phoenixthoughtsandchronicles

[phoenixthoughtsandchronicles]

Triggers and Thoughts

August 23, 2023

This past week has really taught me what my triggers are as well as my thought process when I get triggered. Yes I have been out of my previous relationship/marriage since 2014. I have taken the time to figure out who I am as a mother, woman as well as a person in general. The healing journey that I have been on over the years has really taught me a lot and is still teaching me. Overcoming narcissistic abuse is extremely tough especially when you have to have some sort of relationship with the abuser still due to the children and trying to co-parent with them.I am just now getting to the spot in my life and healing journey to start to open up about my abuse that I have lived through to help teach and support other people that have gone through it. I have had to learn for myself that it is ok to ask for help and to get the help that I needed. Asking for help is not a weakness like some people may say and make you feel. Asking for help is actually a sign of strength in my opinion, it shows that you have tried to fight through and heal on your own and that you have reached the point in your healing journey to get the help that you need to continue your journey. I had to come to terms a couple years ago to reach out for help,it was one of the hardest things I did, was to admit that I needed the help. My fears had come true when I started getting the help that I needed, PTSD from Narcissistic Abuse, that was one of the toughest things for me to hear, I knew what I was dealing with, but to have it confirmed hit different for me. With that said, I have been able to continue to heal and grow as well as become a better mother to my children who also have to deal with the after effects of the abuse. So after coming out of the situation that I was in for 13yrs I have learned what my triggers are as well and am still learning how to control my mindset when I do get triggered. I have been triggered recently and it has taught me to rewire the way I think and to not take certain words and actions as personal. I have to remember that the person that has triggered me, does not know what I have come out of and also it could be that they are going through a situation and this is how they are dealing with it. I feel that it is one of the hardest things to do is to rethink and to be mindful on how you react, I have dealt with everything being my fault and that I am not good enough for anyone. So I close with this....whatever it is that you are going through, you are loved, you are worth being loved, you are a fighter, you do have the strength to get through this. Is it going to be easy? NOT AT ALL, it is going to take work on your part to get through. Sometimes you just have to go day by day and even hour by hour at times. You will rise above it all in the end, just keep pushing through and continue your healing journey.

[phoenixthoughtsandchronicles]

[phoenixthoughtsandchronicles]

Snakes and Grass

Thought of the day..grass and snakes...in life you always have people that are trying to slither their way into your life to try and destroy it. Snakes love that tall grass being that they can hide and it makes it easier to sneak up on their prey. People are the same way, people will try to manipulate their way into your life to destroy everything that you have worked hard for. Your grass has been too tall, meaning that you have allowed too many people into your yard that you have no idea what they are for as well as their intentions. It is always a great thing to be sure to cut that grass short and be well aware of the people you allow into your yard. When you start being aware of your yard and who is in your yard is when you will realize who in your life are there to actually make it better and help you get through whatever it is that life throws at you. When you keep your yard clean and manicured it is easier to spot the snakes in your life that are sent to destroy you. Keep your grass cut short and be aware of people around you and who you call a friend....stay strong and do better everyday. There is always room to grow as an individual no matter the age. Don't allow people to destroy you, learn from your mistakes and grow from it to get stronger.