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i am brave and strong and capable and i can say no as much as i want

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trees i'd like to plant in the event of a miraculous home acqusition

Ong nursery, Clausen's Nursery

elderberry (mexican?)

lemon

peach?

snow queen nectarine

passionfruit vine

jasmine bush?

thyme, basil, cilantro, parsley, green onion

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The Drowned Halls

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a list of goals (one week of summer left)

beach

thrift

sourdough starter

start a very very very light load of planning for next year (art schedule, novels, list of supplies?)

read so much

make sourdough starter

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A Conversation with Richard Siken by Thomas Hobohm

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I'M ALIVE!!!!!! (goals for summer 2025)

i've had an existential crisis where i wanted everything in my life to change but then when i took steps toward making big life changes, i didn't really like the direction and then there was that old adage that "hey maybe i'm just running from myself and i'll still be there when i get there"

really really design the bedroom (rug, paint, probably siding?)

frame the art

buy art

get a new dresser

plan to renovate the bathroom(s)

fill the holes in the wall

surf (3) times

save lots of money

book japan trip (lol at odds with the previous point)

pick a ring you like and tell k

i talked to dana today and she really validated how hard it is to have difficult students and that hey, this really really tough time is in part because of me but its also because the kids are tough. and it drains you. we do more tomorrow and move on, and again, etc etc.

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love love love 🍅🥕🥬 | JOMP book photo challenge | 16 August 2024

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2025 reads!

A Snake Falls to Earth

Saevus Corax Deals with the Dead

Ebony Gate

Starling House

Tress of the Emerald Sea

The Familiar

Emily Wilde's Encyclopaedia of Faeries

Someone You Can Build A Nest With

The Book That Wouldn't Burn

How to Become the Dark Lord and Die Trying

A study in all types of fiction and worlds and diving deep into places and spaces that are magical and foreign. I had a great reading year and I think it's in large part due to moving back into the fantasy world (I'm always in it, but I really prioritized it this year). So many special books that I can't wait to revisit. Happy New Reading Year!

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fruitless

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my thoughts are trying to kill me

they have knives and switchblades and wait in the corners for me to wave goodbye to friends

in my moment alone, they take knotches out

again and again and again

and retreat

never dealing the final stroke

waiting more

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it's not that serious!!!!!!! think about if you were a character in a book

goals for break!

keep the basil alive

finish some more landscaping

go to irvine? LA? drive home??

valley thrift

jump in the ocean!

read more more more!

bake at least one more thing

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Gustav Klimt, Forrest House in Weissenbach, 1912

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i lost my phone TWICE today

running around the school, i left it in the 1st grade printer room and then downstairs from my house. not terrible losses, but the downstairs one absolutely got me good. thanks to m.d always

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they tried to cancel the street bomb night

with cones and lights and crowds of uniforms to ward of the riff raff "no speed, no wheels, no free fall" they said "we watch these street and they will be safe" they came with jeans and shoes torn to shreds for shredding's the goal and lights and cops and cones did all their goal except when you dream of flying and you've already got artemis' wings why would something as simple as ground stand in your way?

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a letter to you, of many.

i always think it will be my last

every time you come back to this place, i risk something. another broken heart, being the one who is in pain, having my peaceful life interrupted. i am not innocent. i know much of it is from a place of care (actually i really don't know that - and that makes me raging mad). in fact, a lot of this makes me raging mad. a friend asked why i don't just block you and it really feels like the right thing to do now.

i deserve peace. i am not interested in any more. i am so grateful for my big full life and it does not have room for this any more. addendum on 8/3:: and then i find out you're MARRIED and did this either right before, during, or right afterwards. that also makes me so very mad. that is all

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and if they try to slow you down, tell them all

to go to hell

why why, why?