pikminfan80 - Tumblr blog

[pikminfan80]

-a very messy post about march in persona 3

sylvia plath / petfurniture on twitter / v.e. schwab / langston hughes / richard silken

[pikminfan80]

for what you have left undone

and, more, what you've left behind

[pikminfan80]

do you think i'll get into heaven?

[pikminfan80]

what if i'd been in love with you since we were children but you'd only let me close to you if we were fighting or you were literally unconscious. and after years of this we were forced to sing for our lives in an alien death game, and in the middle of our song i made out with you and then started strangling you so they'd kill me and you would survive. AND we were both boys. what then.

[pikminfan80]

normal about this btw

[pikminfan80]

you ever feel like you were born with something rotten inside you and if people get close enough they’re gonna find out

[pikminfan80]

thoughts on futa's door and the tunnel in backdraft

boy we have got to talk about this boy

To elaborate more on what this could mean, i think it could have something to do with the fact that futa felt himself part of his friendgroup (the team) because of all the things he did with them together (playing for the team) but they never really saw him as one of them nor did they care (he was barely substitute). It makes sense even looking at his outfit, soccer /players/ don't really dress like that on the field. The substitutes on the bench do

Backdraft constantly plays into his lack of belonging, even though all of his actions come from his own sense of belonging to the group. It wasn't reciprocated

Him entering a soccer stadium in substitute-like clothing but ending up in a dangerous, dark, neverending underground tunnel just further showcases how much he was NOT meant to reach the field with the rest of the team.

[pikminfan80]

Reworking my neurodivergent Fuuta post because I had more to add and wanted it in one place 👍It started out just silly thoughts and projection but I have a lot of evidence now??? It feels pretty solid!

🔴 He holds to an overwhelming sense of right, wrong, rules, justice, etc. It’s a system that makes sense to him (you learn to apologize before anything else, right?) and he’s obsessed with it. He's an extreme rule follower. He's obviously careful so he's not called out online, but even inside Milgram. He follows Es' orders naturally. Even though they’re silly, in the minigrams he’s repeatedly reminding people of the rules about requesting items. Even though he'd been shown to voice thoughts about escaping, he refuses, and is too much of a stickler that he won’t even let other people request things considered dangerous.

🔴 He takes things very literally, most notably some of the interrogation questions. In both his vds he’s pretty particular about describing his involvement, taking a long time to admit he could be a killer because his situation falls pretty far out of its normal definition.

🔴 He’s shown to be intensely lonely: sitting alone, walking alone, watching others from the outskirts, but thriving online where the social rules are different. He has trouble identifying/defining friendships, choosing to focus on the sharing of interests and excitement.

🔴 However, he does find a group that accepts him and listens to him -- and that feeling of belonging becomes intoxicating. The typical “gets a taste of doing something correctly but then gets carried away and crosses a line in excitement”

🔴 He doesn’t think hard work can get him anywhere in society, he doesn’t have any goals, he struggles at school, he wants to just go with the flow -- aka, burnout from trying so hard in a society that isn’t made to accommodate you. Instead of focusing on that, he loses himself in fictional worlds of heroes and villains. He sees connections in everyday life, occasionally getting so lost in them that thoughts of them bleed into reality.

🔴 He's bad at lying. Or, he has to deal with people pointing out nonsensical body language cues to make assumptions about his emotions (which is just as much a neurodivergent experience, unfortunately).

🔴 I know all the prisoners have some kind of act they put up to cover up their true emotions, but it’s still so obvious how he lashes out in anger instead of properly processing/expressing his legitimate fear of the entire situation.

🔴 Extreme restlessness when waiting in an empty room all alone

🔴 This may be more personal interpretation than evidence (because I don’t know how it holds up in the original Japanese), but his line in Muu’s bday timeline just struck me as someone who isn't usually accepted or accommodated for when they're feeling down.

🔴 Also. Transed Gender. 🏳️‍⚧️

[pikminfan80]

Musical Chainshipping kiss son or Musical Stuilly kiss daughter

[pikminfan80]

going insane btw

[pikminfan80]

rotating them in my mind like a microwave

[pikminfan80]

The catgirl hasn't even shown up yet and she's all over my dash; but this awesome young orc woman is being overlooked?

[pikminfan80]

we're not dating

[pikminfan80]

Getting a bit sick of all the "ooh I'm so glad Laios has a soft body!" "Laios is built like an average guy" style posts. Because he doesn't and isn't.

Laios is built like a fucking professional wrestler. He isn't like, super chiseled or anything but he does not have an "average" body, he his built like someone who does a LOT of physical effort and training.

[pikminfan80]

24 ribs

[pikminfan80]

diversity win! the alien planet you landed on that houses living plant creatures and giant bugs is all transgender! all of it!

[pikminfan80]

OH MY GOD. IM SO SORRY GIRLBORB. FORGIVE ME.

HRNG... im so hungry for pikmin