vent blog w religious/christian themes | idk man i hate it here and wish Jesus would come back so everyone stops fucking hurting eachother
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#politics are so fucking stupid#like. american specifically but other places too#left right left right left right#you do realize that you're both just different wings on the same bird right#i hate it#so much#i dont know what to believe anymore honestly#i feel like i cant trust anyone but God#but i barely hear anything from him too#i need guidance but i cant trust man#so all i can do is flounder about like a fish out of water#desperate for answers like air but never able to breathe it in#im tired#i should sleep but i dont want to wake up on this planet again tomorrow#i want to be in the clouds#where a hug is waiting for me#and my dad is#and my pets#and my grandpa#and where all the suffering ends forever#i want that more than life itself#but when i pray that i dont wake up i always do#so i guess i must have some purpose to accomplish here#im so tired
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#i wonder why God took my dad so early a lot#yeah yeah laugh it up the rapturehead vent freak on tumblr is fatherless#but still i do#i want my dad so bad#i never got to know him the way i should have#i was only in 5th grade#i didnt get to know him with an actual cognitive ability that could understand#he should still be here#we could have watched horror movies together and laughed at how cheesy they are#we could have gone on trips#i should be huddled into his side right now watching shitty cartoons at 3am in his room#but instead his room is my room now#and he's not here#i love you dad#i hope to see you soon#preferably without the dying part
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#i hate that i was put on this planet against my will#and now the only way out is either jesus coming back or death#like what the fuck is this#i dont want to be here but i cant leave unless i die#and im scared to die#so all i can do is sit and pray and beg jesus to come back#its pathetic isnt it?#i wonder if theres anyone else out there who feels the way i do#its so lonely feeling like this
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#i hate thinking#and i hate being alone with my own thoughts#why are there so many religions#in a way i know that its wonderful#to be such diverse people with such diverse ideas#but fuck#i wish we just had one#so i could rest in it and let my mind be at ease#instead of constantly doubting#it hurts#so bad#some people say that they have dreams from God#and visions#and can talk to him and he answers in a way that they can percieve#i want that so badly#i wonder if im too broken a lot#if there's just something so fucked up about me that jesus doesn't want to talk to me#and i know he wouldn't want me to think that way about myself#but i cant help it#i want to hear him#i want to be close with him and hold him close#i want to be his best friend#i want i want i want#thats all i ever seem to do isn't it#maybe thats why i cant hear him#because all i ever do is want#and i cant even follow his commandments properly#but no one can really#we all fall short#i dont know
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#i feel like the whole “gen z doesn't care about ww3” trend is going on isn't because we (hopefully) don't actually care#i feel like its because we dont know what to fucking do#like. weve been thrown into a post pandemic nightmare where our governments are constantly threatening to nuke eachother#and were the adults now so we should do smth abt it#but What The Fuck Do We Do#im 20 and i feel like im 16#i feel like im still just a baby#and now ww3 is on the cusp of happenint#what the fuck do i do in this situation#i want people to be safe and happy and live long happy lives full of love#i know that's naive#but why should it be? humans made the rules#why did we make them so horribly to where people have to die for stupid reasons by our own hands#why couldn't we have made life as fair as we possibly could#why did we fuck this up so badly?#sometimes i wonder if God regrets making us#i know he did at some point#and he destroyed almost everything and started over#and we fucked it up again!!!#it seems like all we're capable of doing is sin#hurting eachother in the name of greed and gluttony#and im so SICK of it#i want to go home#please take us home#please make it end
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#its so hard to see the beauty in the small things#knowing that im a privleged piece of shit#living a life i dont deserve#while innocent people who's only sin was being born in the wrong place#suffer every single day#they don't get to take their dogs for walks#and hang out with their friends#and eat their favorite foods#and play their favorite games#and join random discord calls to be silly#and run shitty vent blogs on tumblr#they dont get to experience the most mundane things that mean nothing to me but would mean the world to them#and its so so so not fair#they deserve what i have more than i do#so why do i have it and they dont#why cant humans just be nice to each other#why do we have to hate each other#why is our species so fucked up?#it makes me feel helpless#because even if i try to do something#will it really matter?#i can protest#i can write letters and make posts#but im just a stupid fucking kid#and i sure as hell dont have the balls to do anything drastic#does that make me selfish? I dont know#why did they fuck up the world so much#and how are we dumbass fresh adults supposed to fix it
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i hate it here
#we were put on this earth and we immediately ruined everything#all we do is hurt eachother and make eachother suffer#those in power get to hide away while millions of innocent people are killed#children dont get to play on playgrounds or go outside with their friends or skip rocks in the river#because theyre too busy being fucking MURDERED#its horrible#its so fucking horrible#i just want to go home#i want the innocent people to go home#to go somewhere where no elites or rich people or any sort of scumbag can ever hurt them again
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