planet-of-the-machines

[planet-of-the-machines]

Hey Guys! juuuust Realized something here. You guys are still holed up in that ballroom with the karaoke machine while Uzi and N are going after that Old murder drone right? Well, i may be a guy who watches too many old Earth movies, buuuuuuut it may just be the whole "meta guy" schtick i've gotten saddled with but the song "Ballroom Blitz" by the band "Sweet" isn't on the track list right? cuz if someone starts singing it, that fight is Definately gonna breach that room you're all in. -Swerve

Ballroom, Cabin Fever Resort bunker

Braiden: “Let me get this straight. You chose this place for the trip, because whatsherface is looking into her family history!?” 

Heatwave: *bluntly* “And we wanted to figure out what’s wrong with Lizzy and Ms. Rasputin. Kind of important if we don’t want Prom to happen again.”

Damien: “This is bullshit. Why drag the rest of us along on this venture? We have better things to do!” 

Trailbreaker: “If it weren’t for Lizzy’s hand in Prom, you guys would’ve won the blog contest. My students didn’t think it was really fair to leave you guys out. Also, Mr. Vernon told me you guys needed to see the world outside the outpost now that our home isn’t under siege…” *under his breath* “for now…” 

Jazz: “Though to be fair, we didn’t think his [Treavor’s] daughter would hitch a ride despite needing to serve jail time. An’ we don’t need to speak for the storm outside.” 

Lizzy: “Hey, I was, like, dying of boredom in that cell.”

Chad: “Shut up, you murderer! Get lost!”

Whirl: “Hey, she’s still your classmate! Wasn’t she–”

Damien: “Uh, does it look like we care? She’s acted like a b**ch since we started high school. I don’t know about everyone else, I only tolerated Lizzy’s antics and bullying because our teacher was her old man, and Doll would have kicked our aftshafts with or without her witchcraft!” *beat* “Except for the emo, she’s just weird.”

…

Chase: *in his usual blunt, to-the-point manner of speaking* “I will ignore that last detail for this conversation. However, I must ask what this accusation of bullying entails, exactly.”

Braiden: “Try burning rare memorabilia from the surface for starters. Or spreading libel online about Rachel.”

Emily: “Or trapping me in my locker! Several times!!!”

*Concerned, Trailbreaker looked towards the pink-eyed drone’s father.*

Trailbreaker: “Treavor, do you know anything about that?”

*Treavor, for his part, is lighting a cigarette in the corner of the ballroom without a care about his daughter’s antics. Or for the explanation his colleague and his students had just provided for the whole field trip, for that matter. He remains silent, apathetic.

*As this was happening, Lizzy was watching, her face emotionless, but her processor was starting to freak out. A few sweatdrops were starting to appear on her visor, something V, who had been tasked with making sure the cheerleader didn’t do anything funny, noticed.*

Cliff: *surprised* “So you’re saying that you don’t like her either?”

Thad: *a little sheepish* “Um, we never really did. We kind of just ignored what Lizzy did and minded our own business for the most part. Until… you know.”

Cliff: … *happily* “Well, why didn’t you say so!?”

Hot Rod: *somewhat skeptical* “Alright, so we all hate Lizzy. What are you going to do once we get home, though? Are you just going to pretend she doesn’t exist, or…?”

Rebecca: “Nah, I’d rather she rot in that cell of hers. ‘Cause frankly, her weird vampire powers are gonna cause problems if she’s let out.”

Lizzy: “AHEM.”

*The blue-haired cheerleader turns around to see Lizzy standing right next to her, arms crossed, with her visor reading [[I’M RIGHT HERE]]*

Rebecca: *otherwise unfazed* “You heard me, bitch.” 

Lizzy: *eyelights return, with an annoyed expression and ‘bulging vein’ symbol in the corner* “Do you want me to maul you? Because you’re, like, really pushing it with what you’re saying.” *to the others* “Same with the rest of you losers.” 

Rebecca: “If you did, that diva of a genocide bot–” *gestures to V* “–would kill you in a heartbeat.” 

V: *unamused* “Don’t patronize me.”

???: “Uh, guys?”

*The students turn to see Bumblebee leaning in through the main doorway into/out of the ballroom.*

Bee: “Am I interrupting something?”

Hot Rod: *briefly glancing towards the WD students* [[We’ll continue this later.]] *to Bee* “Nope! Just got done explaining why we’re really here.”

Heatwave: *groaning* “Please tell me you’ve got that rogue murder bot far away from here.”

Bee: “Uh, we’ve got her pinned to a wall.” 

*stunned_silence.mp3*

Boulder: “Does this place have a construction magnet like back home?”

Bee: “We used ninja stars, actually. A lot of them. You can thank N.” *to Hot Rod, in a lower voice* “Can we please trade places now? J’s looking through the other files in that room, and that disassembler is… a little weird.”

Hot Rod: “Eh, sure, how bad could it be?”

Bee: *bluntly* “She claims she used to be human.”

…

Hot Rod: *in disbelief* “…what.”

Bee: “I’m serious. She claims she used to be human, like all those dead folks that were in here… that you’ve cleared out… might explain why she’s laughing a lot.”

Chase: “May I request to join you?”

Hot Rod: “Please. I think you know how to interrogate maniacs, considering you’re going into the Elite Guard, but I know that I can’t do that for the life of me.”

*Chase and Hot Rod leave, as the yellow, undersized Heavy Drone looks at everyone else (including the comatose Orion Pax)*

Bee: “So, uh, I heard you’ve found a karaoke machine…”

A/N: Sorry for the lack of an awesome fight scene. I’ve just started my summer job, and I couldn’t find the energy to write about the confrontation between Uzi and the unknown murder drone.

Although, if you’ve been paying attention, you may have already figured out their identity…

[planet-of-the-machines]

Question for Blades and Hot Shot. Who else is in your class?

At least this is something to take our processors off the increasingly-concerning messages from my girlfriend’s class.

Aside from brownie McD***face [AN: Wedge], there’s Medix. He’s the one who helped Dr. Ratchet (his uncle, believe it or not) communicate with the other class a moment ago. He means well, but the guys’s very… terse? Dr. Rung thinks he has something like Autism because of something weird about how his OS was set up…

-Hot Shot

What Hot Shot’s saying is that Medix is not very emotional. Like Spock, if anyone gets the reference. 

Salvage is the complete opposite, in that regard. He’s a head taller than the rest of us, and is strong enough to lift a floor beam. He also really, really likes trash, especially trash left by humans before… you know. 

-Blades

Salvage thinks a scrapyard hides hidden treasure for some reason. Frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is where he got his name. 

Then there’s Hoist. No, not the guy in the Expedition Corps, I mean his son. The guy’s an inventor, and the only guy other than Blades I consider a friend in our class. His self-confidence could use a little work, though…

After that we have Moonracer, and she’s a… uh, is pick-me-up too offensive?

-Hot Shot

Don’t know. But I don’t think she’s the kind of person to chew us out if we did…

-Blades

Right. 

Anyway, then there’s Wheelie. Always speaking like he’s a medieval bard. And rhyming even when he isn’t singing. I swear he’s trying to get on my robo-God-damn nerve–

-Hot Shot

I don’t think he means to do that, Hot Shot. But yeah, Wheelie’s way of talking tends to annoy the adults, too.

-Blades

True, true.

At least Shadow tries to not rub us the wrong way, I’ll give him that. He’s the class clown and designated punching bag, speaks Korean and acts like he’s a ninja sometimes. Hung out with Wedge until Prom, for reasons neither of them are spitting out.

Finally, there’s Bluestreak. He’s… reclusive. Transferred to us from Outpost 8 last year after it got crippled by a trio disassembly drones (a team that I’m pretty sure were NOT N and his sisters). There were other survivors, but I heard the place was so trashed they had to abandon it and move to our outpost. 

-Hot Shot

I think Bluestreak’s just homesick.  I’ve been meaning to try and talk to him for a while, but life and stuff keeps getting in the way.

-Blades

[planet-of-the-machines]

Are you guys alright? Is Pax okay? The storm must be scrambling transmissions badly, Ratchet has been trying to get in contact with a video call to try to help with Pax's injury you mentioned, but we're not having any luck. Brainstorm pinged me, their messages aren't getting through to you now. I think only text channels will have a chance of reaching you through the storm cell.

Be safe out there...

Chromedome, Outpost 15 (currently messaging from Outpost 3)

Orion’s... alive, but barely. Teach managed to get Jazz, Heatwave, and Whirl to stop the oil flow from his missing arm/shoulder motor-joint, but the archivist’s in coma mode right now. Chromedome, please get Dr. Ratchet on the line so we know if we've patched the wound correctly.

-Boulder

Way ahead of you guys!

-Hot Shot

OK, Hot Shot and my nephew are telling me how to use this deprecated human tech, and apparently the photo feature on this thing was disabled after Orion showed off that robo-God-damned artifact. Can you kids describe the wound for me? I need to know how bad it is if you idiots want any chance to save the fool’s life. [Ratchet]

Please excuse my uncle’s abrasiveness. [Medix]

-Hot Shot

No worse than when the cat-bot tore my arm off during the breach. Better, actually; it’s a clean break, like that rouge genocide bot used a ridiculously tough sword to slice Orion’s arm off at it’s joint. 

-Cliff

Cliffjumper, you were brought to the repair bay within minutes of losing your limb. Mr. Pax lost who-knows-how-much oil before we applied that wall plate to stop the bleeding. We’re lucky Jazz brought a welding torch…

-Heatwave

Oh. Orion should be fine, then, the coma will keep him alive despite the oil loss. Just be careful with how you handle him on the way home. I should be able to remove that plate and give him a transfusion when you bring him back. And a new arm.

Just… please, don’t get yourselves into further trouble. [Ratchet]

-Hot Shot

Crisis averted. 

Now Bee, can you please get the gremlin and her friend to turn down those noises? 

-Heatwave

That’s Uzi fighting that Disassembly Drone right now, and she seems pissed. I don’t think she’ll listen to me if I try talking to her right now.

Really hope N calms her down so she doesn’t terminate the MD.

…Aaaaaand they just blew a hole in a wall. :(

-Bee 

Do you guys want me to just tell the others what’s going on? I don’t think we can really hide it anymore.

-Thad

…

Gather them up. Might as well do it on our terms.

-Hot Rod.

[planet-of-the-machines]

[Direct Transmission encoded]

Spinister: you guys do what you can to make it out alright, got it? I don't have any practical experience with combating disassembly drones, but I know a few anecdotes from some of the retired salvagers and base defenders.

Sufficiently bright light, not even UV light, can stun drones of any kind. A flashbang grenade is best, but I've heard overcharged camera flashes work just as well.

Also, if someone can locate that bunkers oil reservoir, you might be able to lure it there. I've actually seen a few desperate murder drones focus on a filled oil tanker over a group of under-armed workers.

Stay safe. Try to keep everyone you can alive.

Oh right, question.

[File link]

I made a meme. You can totally see bubble girl doing this right?

P.s. F came in and holed up in the room I've been laid up in. She looks mopey/thoughtful about something.

P.p.s. the salvage team hasn't seen your recent posts yet. Director Cerebros has been chewing out Crosshairs and Glit for the past hour.

[File content: A GIF of a segment of the spongebob movie, (Dennis at the thug tug) with V's head superimposed over Dennis]

Uh, no. We can't see the first meme. And V looks... I can't tell how she feels about that SpongeBob one.

BTW, Emily found a TV with a Karaoke machine. Teach has called Tear n' Chase called off because of that and... you know.

-Hot Rod

OH COME ON!!! I really wanted to play that! Could've easily broke that blue-haired b**ch's visor for her attitude.

-Cliff

No harming Mr. Vernon's students, Cliffjumper. You already hurt them enough during the first round of Tug-o'-War.

Then again, putting one class on each end of the rope wasn't the best idea in hindsight...

-Trailbreaker

Honey, I can give Rebecca a talk after we get home. Your nerves aren't the only ones she's been getting on.

Side note: Does anyone else find it weird how quiet Lizzy's been?

-Arcee

Why is Orion missing an arm?

-Boulder

...

...One moment, folks.

-Hot Rod

[planet-of-the-machines]

A Talk Between Siblings

???: “Madam, your father said you weren’t allowed to mess with damaged drone parts after what happened last week.”

???: *speaking in a posh Australian accent* “Oh c’mon Jaybird, I’m not doing this for arts and crafts this time. I wanna actually fix this one ‘ere.” 

???: “Miss Elliott, you know your parents will–”

???: “I know, Janet. But it’ll be worth it! It’ll be like havin’ a little brother!”

…

???: *sighs* “If you insist. What are you going to name him?”

???: *hums* “… I think I’ll call him… Nolan.”

???: “…J? You alright?”

*J exits yet another file that’s appeared in her memory core, the latest of many that have appeared since her team’s colossal screw-up. Her OS returned to the same dark mansion that was, honestly, beginning to get on her nerves.*

J: *slightly annoyed* “I told you, N, I’m fine.”

N: *sheepishly* “Ok… then should I not be concerned that you’ve been lagging out for the last few minutes?” *grins awkwardly, shrugging, a nervous sweatdrop visible on N’s visor*

A/N: Lagging out is the term Disassembly Drones use for suddenly freezing up, usually in response to seeing something particularly distressing, or remembering a crucial boundary, regulation, etc. that was just violated, like one of JCJenson’s numerous rules. 

*J doesn’t respond.*

N: *exhales* “Sis, it’s okay. Whatever’s on your mind–”

J: *snaps at her little brother/teammate* “Why are you willing to work with these failed applicants?”

N: *innocently confused* “Eh?”

J: *audibly frustrated, lightly shaking* “What led you to break policy after our capture? You know we were supposed to keep our mouths zipped in case of rival entity interrogation. You should’ve stayed silent! So why did you open contact with the enemy?”

N: “Uh, it wasn’t like they were going to kill us–”

J: “You know some of them wanted to!” *her yellow eyelights begin flickering pinkish-red* “Sweet corporate, do you even listen to yourself? What’s keeping these toasters from decommissioning us here and now? We had one job, N. One. Job.” *pokes her brother in the visor between his eyelights, orienting her tail like a scorpion’s* “Kill as many of these walking policy violations per quarter as we can, and we won't get scrapped. Sure, we weren’t the best team in JCJenson’s shed, but at least eliminating these… maybe corrupt tin cans were our core competency. But your blue sky programming HAD to drop the ball on us! Now I’ll admit that I was wrong about these worthless wastes of space and their intentions, but…  I-I just don’t understand why you thought integrating into this undeveloped entity had legs! I-I want to believe you’re playing a long game with these toasters, to strike them once we’ve ‘gained their trust,’ but I know your OS doesn’t have the bandwidth to plan somethi–” 

N: *shrill* “What!? I-I-I’m sorry, why would I want to–”

*at this point J grabs N by the shoulders and begins shaking him, eyelights turning pinkish-red fully*

J: “You’re supposed to do that! That’s the only way this makes sense! The company expects–”

N: “Forget the company, J! they want us dead!!!” 

J: “Not if we demonstrate our continued value as–”

N: “I DON’T CARE ABOUT THAT!!!”

…

J: “What?”

*The male murder drone notices his sister didn’t say that with the same venom or assertiveness as usual. There wasn’t even a hint of anger in it. It was more… confused.*

N: *speaking a little quickly*  “I-I-I know this is grounds for termination but I never liked killing noncompliant drones. I-I’d gladly do it in self-defense or if they threatened you or V but it just never felt right! I never said anything until now because you said asking questions is anathema to policy but…” *breathes, slows his talking to normal* “…but I don’t see a point anymore, J. I don’t see a reason to continue our hunts anymore.”

J: “What about–”

N: “I really don’t want a branded pen either. For… uh, multiple reasons.” 

J: “That’s not–” *pinching her nose if she had one, starting to visibly glitch* “N, we and corporate are still family. We wouldn’t exist without them!”

N: *audibly tired* “That doesn’t change anything. I know Jenson built us, possibly twice, but if the company really was family, they’d have rescued us and destroyed Outpost 3 weeks ago. A family doesn’t just… abandon other members. And when have we really been in Sentinel’s good graces? No, the company isn’t family. You are.”

Uzi: “Are you two done?”

*N and J turn to see Uzi standing in the doorway to the room they were just in, arms crossed and with an annoyed expression.*

Uzi: “I swear to robo-God, you couldn’t have sounded sappier if you tried.”

N: *switches to his usual chipper mood as if flicking a switch* “Oh, are you done looking through the files?”

*Bumblebee comes up from behind the purple-haired shifter, holding a small data stick.* 

Bee: “Actually, we’ve decided to just download the relevant files and those that sounded imported onto this hard drive I brought with me for this trip. Now all we’re doing is–”

*As if on cue, a loud noise echoes down the hall. An alert appears on N and J’s visors– the latter’s eyelights returning to their normal pale yellow –as they recognize what they heard: a laser cannon. Specifically the standard laser cannon that is one of many deadly weapons in a Disassembly Drone’s arsenal. This is accompanied by a certain emo drone’s eyelights instantly hollowing out.*

Uzi: “Orion!!”

*She immediately converts to her buggy form and drives at full speed down the hall, before turning to her left, out of her friends’ sight.*

Bee: *hesitant* “… Do we follow her?”

*J gives the yellow, relatively small Heavy Drone a tired glare, prompting him to slowly walk backwards into the room. She then turns to N, only to find he’s already running after his little friend.*

[planet-of-the-machines]

Reference: the Cabin Fever students.

Credit goes to rat_with_revolver on Reddit.

I'm making these redesigns canon to POTM, as I think it makes these particular classmates of Uzi stand out a little more.

[planet-of-the-machines]

Concern

EMERGENCY!!! EMERGENCY!!! OH MY ROBO-GOD—-

-Bee

What chatterbox is saying is that there’s an unidentified disassembler running loose in this place. Don’t be surprised if you guys get attacked. 

-Uzi 

WHAT!?!?

-N

Bee, I swear to robo-God that if you left the doors unlocked…

-Heatwave

No, this one was already here before we even came. We found it near a drone recharging bay. I… uh, I think we accidentally woke it up when we turned the lights on. 

-Bee

Not exactly helping your case. Why didn’t you just bash his head in?

-Cliff

QUIT COMPLAINING ABOUT OUR INVESTIGATION METHODS!!!!!!

-UZI

Calm down, kids. Now’s not the time to point fingers.

Bee, Chase, you said you brought your guns with you? Keep an eye out, and if you see that murder drone, don’t be afraid to use them. Uzi, I’m heading over to see what’s up. 

-Orion.

I didn’t ask for–  … actually, nevermind. You need to see what I’ve found on mom and Aunt Yeva.

-Uzi

Wait, what does the interloping disassembler even look like? Is he a normie model or not? 

-Hot Rod

She. It’s a she. And she’s an Alpha-1 model wearing a JCJenson technician’s outfit. And her hair’s black.

-N

Didn’t V say that was phased out? 

-Boulder

Black? I thought all you guys had silver hair. At least we’ll be able to tell her apart from your sisters… no offense, but you all kind of look the same.

-Cliff

We aren’t all freaking Valkyrur, d*******. Of course we have different hair colors! >:(

And yes, the Alpha-1 was phased out in favor of the Alpha-2. But the purple freak said this girl was already in here, right? Corporate probably missed her or something. 

-V

Impossible. An administrative error like that would have been noticed by Sentinel Major and rectified!

-J

You’d be surprised how efficient corporations are beneath the PR, Ms. J. Especially the ones that qualify for having the “mega” prefix. 

On a more serious note, please be safe.  You too, Orion.

-Trailbreaker

[planet-of-the-machines]

[Voice transcription enabled]:

>Glad to see you've got something out of your search. Data is a big part of our salvage runs too, so more advice for this-<

-/always carry no fewer than seven data storage methods at all times! If you're taking the physical computer or drive the data is on it does not count towards that total!/-

> *sigh* brainstorm, it's only three. You carry more cuz you and chromedome are walking proofs of Murphy's law. Next, because it's relevant, the body isn't dead unless you see the "fatal error" message on the display. Cuz it's a disassembly drone, you'll want to double your caution. We don't try to salvage from bodies unless we're certain they're dead. If they're alive and just out of power, it's a rescue mission then. My recommendation would be to find some not rusted or frayed power cable and tie up the drone so if they are playing Possum they won't try anything. I do have some effective methods i could send files for, but... they're the odd human stuff so don't think too hard on if you want the files.<

-/before we forget! Chromedome pinged us, the space bridge is confirmed fixed! They'll be able to open the space bridge once both the storm clears on your end and they have coordinates for your location! Just be sure you're all safe first./-

^yeah, safe, like your fancy new shock cannon you stunned singe with...^

-/Your a doctor! A woman of science! It's not a "shock cannon" it's an Ion Blaster! You should be able to know the difference!/-

^it's overkill is what it is! He's been spewing sparks and spouting nonsense for an hour now! It a miracle he's not gone wacko!^

)Wacko? No! I am Wonko! Wonko the sane!(

^cram it!^

-/more importantly there is no such thing as overkill, only open fire and reload!/-

> I hate the fact I am agreeing with brainstorm here...<

-/thank-/-

>stopping you both there. Glit, where is Doc Minerva anyway?<

^that worker you pulled out of outpost 19 came to. Minerva brought the Director to speak with him, he had him relocated to a different sector so news of outpost 19 wouldn't- JESUS YOU MORON, TURN OFF YOUR TRANSCRIBER!^

>huh? AUGH STOP GRABBIN' AT ME YA DAMN COUGAR!<

^YOUR THE DAMN REASON WE KEEP HAVING TO ATTEND SECURITY SEMINARS WITH YOUR CARELESSNESS!^

>Quit it ill turn it off! You're gonna make me-<

-/oh boy-/-

*a clatter is heard*

[Ask submitted]

- >Crosshairs<, -/Brainstorm/-, ^Glit^, and )Singe( of outpost 15

*Bumblebee ignored the latter part of the ask, and started looking around the room for a suitable… restrictor for the mystery drone.* 

N: “Uh, boss?” *taps her visor* “You there?”

*J remains unresponsive, continuing to stare at the older disassembly drone.*

N: *to Bee and Uzi* “Uh, I’ll be right outside.”

*N walks his older sister just outside the doorway, leaving Uzi to begin skimming the various documents strewn across the monitor, and see if anything relevant came up.

*Going into the “Documents” folder, she found that the latest files were dated to April of 2062, which the young Doorman assumes was right around the time of… uh, whatever killed the humans in the bunker. However, the purple-haired drone knows that this likely would lead nowhere, so she begins scrolling down to view the files dated 20, 25 years ago. 

*To her pleasant surprise, there are plenty of documents dated around that time, and one of them in particular catches her eye. It was titled “Report on the Failed Patch MK2 Test by Dr. Amber.docx,” dated November 2, 2045.* 

Uzi: *snickers in gremlin* “Bingo.”

*She opens the file to find… black bars. 

*Groaning in annoyance, the purple-haired shifter decided to focus on what little was not redacted, which she found was very little as she scrolled down. There were several mentions of “Subject 002 ‘Nori,’” which Uzi was certain meant her mother, as well as “Subject 48 ‘Yeva,’” who was her “aunt” and Doll’s mom. 

*The only other worker drone mentioned in the document was “Service Drone 008 ‘Alice,’” which the young Doorman assumes is referring to Lizzy Vernon’s mother, but she couldn’t care less about that. 

*Uzi began reviewing the other terms that weren’t obscured. Patch MK1. Patch MK2. Host (most often near mentions of Nori). Absolute Solver. 

*That last one caught her attention. Uzi decides to look back at the other files, and after scrolling through them, she finds another document. “Early Outline of the Absolute Solver and its Applications by Dr. Ezra Greene.docx,” dated August 04, 2043.

*Like the first document, this one is censored to Hell and back, but the drone ignores this as she skims what she can read…

* …and what she finds does something few things have ever done: Give her pause. 

*Object manipulation. Object duplication. Organic material. Craving for oil. Madness. Possession. Undeletable. Recessive code. 

*Uzi had expected something to do with magic bullshit when she began this search, considering what Doll was able to do during Prom, but this? This… thing, whatever this Absolute Solver was, sounded more and more like something that did not belong in this world. 

*Before she could look further, however, she was pulled from her tunnel vision back into reality by the sound of a metallic clang. Turning around, Uzi sees the vent cover on the ceiling had fallen onto the floor, before looking up just in time to see a shape enter the vents. The purple-haired shifter looks nearby, and sure enough the older disassembly drone is gone.

*Bee also hears this and yelps when he notices the missing disassembler, dropping a human-sized whip.* 

Bee: “It’s gone!” 

Uzi: “No shit, Sherlock. 

Bee: *grabs his head with both hands* “What are we supposed to do!?” [[calculating best way to panic]]

Uzi: *crosses arms* “First of all, not that. Second, maybe we should get N and give the rest of your class a heads-up?”

[planet-of-the-machines]

Uzi, how exactly is your search going?

*Uzi gets done rummaging through an apartment, the latest of several in its hallway. N has also exited one of the other rooms.*

Uzi: “Still nothing. You?” 

N: “No, not really.” 

Uzi: [[Frustration.MP3]] “Ugh, there’s GOT to be something in these rooms!”

N: “Well, J said things like this take time. Sometimes what you’re looking for is doing its best at hiding.”

Uzi: “N, this isn’t hunting— how does that relate to what we’re doing now!?”

N: “Quite a bit. Sure, what we’re looking for isn’t running for their lives… …but whatever was up with your mom was probably something Jenson didn’t want anyone finding out about.” 

J: “Are you two done talking? Your conversation is so unprofessional it makes me want to download malware.”

Uzi: “BITE ME!” *steps into J’s face, pointing at her* “You’re not helping!” 

J: “Because I know how unproductive your wild goose chase is.” 

N: “J! We barely defeated Doll at prom, and she almost killed V! What if she shows up again!?”

J: *skeptical* “And you think the answers to that can be found here?”

Uzi: “Well it’s the only place that’s come up that could have them, you brainwa–!”

Bee: *from inside another room* “Uh, guys? I might have found something…”

*The three follow the yellow HD’s voice into the room, where they find a skeleton dressed in a black garment that, much like most of the furnishings in this bunker, looked like it came right out of the Victorian era. On the wall next to what was likely a teenage girl was a recharging bay.

*And laying on the floor next to both was an inactive Disassembly Drone. 

It looked… older than whatever model N and J were. It had the “stilt” legs indicative of being a female model, but they were more… boxy than conical in shape. Ditto with the forearms, though they were more like rectangular prisms. Its hair was black and styled into twintails, each secured with a hair band at the lower end. And it was clothed in the uniform of a JCJenson technician, though the name tag was missing.*

Bee: “Uh, guys, girls. That’s not what I was talking about.”

*The three drones then looked to see Bumblebee standing by and gesturing to a computer terminal built into the wall. It was smaller than him, though that was expected given that this place was built for human habitation specifically, and it was on a password screen. A bunch of post-it notes were plastered on the wall next to the monitor.*

Bee: “The password’s on the post-it note. I-I think whoever owned this was forgetful, or very secluded.”

Uzi: *groans* “Finally!” *walks over* “Let’s get to the bottom of whatever the heck is up with this place.”

*The purple-haired shifter typed in the password, which was just “1235711” which she found a little amusing (at least it wasn’t “1111”). Once she hit the enter key, the computer screen displayed the message “Welcome, JamesElliott” above a buffering symbol.*

J: “You realize this person likely wasn’t part of the company stru–?”

Uzi: “Shut.” 

*The monitor screen immediately went to this “James’” desktop screen.

*…And it was an absolute mess, cluttered with all sorts of files and programs.*

J: *eyelights hollow* “Uh…” *inhales while cringing* “Sweet corporate…”

Uzi: *eyelights also hollow, moreso in surprise* “Holy shi– WE’VE HIT THE JACKPOT!”

*As Uzi starts cackling like a maniac at this and doing her best to shake the taller Bumblebee in excitement, N moves over to the offline Murder Drone on the floor. He rolled it/her over so it/she was laying on their/her back.*

N: *to J* “Looks like an Alpha-1 model… You think we can use this one for spare parts, boss?”

*The pigtailed disassembler looked over to her younger sibling, only to freeze up upon laying eyelights on the inactive, older drone. 

*The drone looked familiar to J.

*Too familiar.*

[planet-of-the-machines]

[Voice transcription enabled]:

^Okay, hard line is knife Monopoly is banned for a reason. The rest of the crew sans F and the sass lump-^

#Go choke on a unicycle!#

^-are chasing down the pyromaniacal gremlin that spoke of it to silence him as a result.^

#Shoot Shoot Bang Bang° is better anyways.#

+So can I tell them now?+

+okay, so the radiation exposure was a while ago. Our team was assigned to what was Florida at the time we were there.+

*a crashing and series of metallic clattering*

^please tell me you weren't involved with that mess!^

+only witnessed. But thats not related. So, we'd been given an assignment to eradicate this group of scrap drones that had been made a mess out of the Orlando sector.+

^scrap drones...? Wait those weirdo cult bots that worshipped the internet and crap?^

+I dunno, but Sentinel Really wanted them dead so we were sent with three other squads to wipe them off the map+

^you aren't doing a good job of convincing me you weren't involved in sinking Florida.^

+anyway, they holed up in an amusement park, and we were gonna bomb the whole place flat. But they had an anti air gun, and one of the other disassembly drones in the bombing run primed his bombs early... and all of us went down in flames. When I came to I'd crashed into a warehouse they'd filled with loads of radioactive sludge the scrappers were stockpiling for some reason. L and W had already found me but they made a mess dragging me out of the wreckage.+

^knowing scrap drones, they probably were drinking the s[&@%#]t^

+... the drones that went after us were yelling about... uh... I think they called it Nuke-a-Cola?+

^*groan, followed by the sound of a drone hand hitting a faceplate*^

+she walked away... does that mean I get to make another question?+

#jus' Shaddup, tryin'a sleep.#

-+Serial Designation F+, #Crankcase#, ^Glit^, of Outpost 15

Those scrap guys were trying to recreate a Nuka-Cola!? Bro, Fallout's just a video game. And I'm pretty sure nuclear waste wasn't in the base formula... unless they were going for the Quantum flavor... I don't wanna know what those guys thinking.

-Thad

Yeah, and I have a feeling we don't want to know what Knife Monopoly is either. Besides, we have the classic version of that game here with us.

Speaking of which, the ballroom's free of corpses! Who wants to play Tug of War?

-Hot Rod

Is it just me, or are the wall LED screen/faux windows acting strange?

-Cliff

Huh. I can kinda see something behind all that static... can't really tell what tho...

Eh, probably nothing important.

-V

I'm sorry, are we not going to ask what happened to Florida?

-Sideswipe

[planet-of-the-machines]

[Voice transcription enabled]:

>Hey class! Crosshairs again-<

+And F!+

>we-<

=hey Cross! Don't leave us out!=

>*sigh* and the rest of the bozos in my salvage team are kinda confined to the repair bay after some trouble with helping field testing brainstorm with some new munitions.<

+I got to drop bombs!+

^And got a load of fried electronics in your systems, so hold still and let me do your repairs birdbrain!^

>yeah, so some munitions were a bit volatile, so we're getting repairs. Saw the details on that blizzard, at least you've got shelter. But since you lot are stuck there, my team and I can give you some tips!<

)Play knife monopol-(

*Sounds of metal clashing on metal*

^Absolutely not! Knife monopoly is banned for a reason! Now bring that wrench back over here, moron.^

>actual first tip, investigate, but do not interfere with the local power source. Exemptions only for skilled reactor personnel.<

/second, do not go off in groups with less than four members! If someone gets stuck, you'll have at least two people to attempt rescue an a third to call for additional help!/

+oh! Don't enter enclosed spaces! My team had to scrounge a lot for supplies. We... kinda got all our wings stuck full open cause we got circuits scrambled by radiation, so we couldn't stow em. And cause of that we get stuck a lot in buildings...+

)not the only thing scrambl-*CLANG*Ow!(

>Shut it, Singe!<

^well, that explains the damages that don't match with the other munitions you clowns tested. I don't have suitable replacement parts here maybe when chromedome gets back I can negotiate some parts for those repairs.^

>okay, we'll send questions every now and then with some advice so you don't get screwed over by architecture no longer up to code. For our first question...<

+ooh! N! What do you and your team do in downtime nowadays? I've been bored cuz I'm not allowed out to fly without others out to keep an eye on me...+

>... eh that works...<

#could you all be quiet? I'm trying to get some recharge in#

- >Crosshairs<, +Serial Designation F+, =Roadbuster=, )Singe(, ^Glit^, /Cloudraker/, and #Crankcase# of Outpost 15

(Added some text flair to tell us apart)- Crosshairs

P.s. we saw the posts from Spinister. We've hooked him up with an empty petabyte hard drive so he can just shove junk data in it. We can't help em with the coma bit til chromedome is back tho. He's our coding expert.

One more thing, Brainstorm told me he's got some special weapon design he's finished testing. He wants it to be a surprise, no matter that I've told him a weapon of his design is the last thing anyone with self-preservation protocols would want to be surprised by...

...

Does using a power amplifier on the power generator count as interference?

-Bee

I believe that would be Wheeljack's area of expertise. Let's just hope you and Uzi didn't strain the electrical transformers or anything crucial.

-Boulder

BITE ME! >:(

And quit complicating my investigation!

-Uzi

I did not say that as an insult.

Also, F, how did you come across radiation? N2 mines get their name from being Non-Nuclear.

-Boulder

Outpost 15's in or near California, right? Maybe one of their earthquakes ruptured a nuclear power plant.

-Hot Rod

I find it more likely that N2 mines hadn't entirely phased out nuclear weapons...

So, anyone going with the gremlin on her little search?

-Heatwave.

Ooh, I'll go!

As for your question, F, I spend my spare time helping out throughout the outpost. It was kinda part of the deal with Mr. Kup and the council has with me. Be useful, and me and my sisters might fully integrate into the outpost.

As for what V and J do...

-N

I've been assigned remedial training courses by these toasters' barely-functioning government. To "undo the corpo brainwashing," one of them said. V has to go back to her cell after class, because apparently she ALMOST GOT HERSELF KILLED!!!

-J

Again, how was I supposed to know Doll would be spamming ctrl + copy on kitchen knives? |:(

Besides, best to stay a little distant, don'tcha think?

-V

Uh, boss? Are you sure you're doing okay?

-N

IM COMPLETELY FINE, N! I'M AS PROFESSIONAL AND UP TO GUIDELINES AS EVER!!!

-J

Take the corporate simp with you. We don't need a mental breakdown ruining the mood.

And Bee.

-Cliff

What!? I'm sorry, as much as I'd like to help Uzi, I'm not going with her! Besides, Hot Rod's not the greatest at camping stories.

-Bee

So we'll send him to replace you after a while.

Seriously, I know J tried to kill you, but you lived. H*ll, you jammed her weapons and sh*t. You can definitely take her for a while.

-Cliff

You'll be fine, Chatterbox. If she tries anything, I'll blow her to bits with my Sick as [Parental Filter activated] Railgun. So can we please get going already?

Also, what's knife monopoly? Sounds fun. >:)

-Uzi

[planet-of-the-machines]

Uzi, you were trapped in Doll's apartment, right? How did you get out?

I opened the air vent in her bathroom to sneak out that way, but it turns out having wings has its drawbacks. So I hid in the pile of corpses she had in the tub, and waited for her and Lizzy to leave. Doll came in, thought I used the vent, and took B*tchface to Prom in a hurry.

Now that I think about it, I Polina must've thought I used the vents and already left... how am I such a genius!? >:D

-Uzi

Guess that explains why you were covered in oil...

Don't get any ideas from this, V.

-Hot Rod

AN: When you forget about a plot hole and an anon asks about it months after the original post...

[planet-of-the-machines]

[Direct Transmission encoded]

[Username: Th3Sinist3rSpinist3r]

You want to know what I saw? Fine then. I'll warn you, I had to dump a lot of memory in order to do ANYTHING but be stuck in a looped scream. So while it's not absolutely everything, there's a LOT.

The start of that test was basic. Simple warp from our portal generator to an emptied storage room. We had some issues with running remote controled machines through the portal, but we could throw an object straight through with no problems.

I volunteered as test subject to make an actual trip through the Stellar Spanner.

The inside of the portal is bizarre. The "path" was like a clear night sky where you're able to see the masses of stars, and around you was a bizarre cross between a fog bank and the Aurora Borealis, with ribbons of cooler colors spiral up and down the span between destinations. You can't really see out either end unless you're close to whichever end. I waved back at 'Dome and 'Brow but they never reacted. I made my way along when I heard... something... I turned to look and saw nothing. But before I turned back I found myself falling backwards over the side somehow.

The further fell, the whisps of nebula like clouds became more stormlike. I saw flashes of something like lightning, but of colors that were beyond the visual spectrum heavy drones have. My sensor network had given up almost entirely. Then, I crashed through? Tore through? broke through? It felt like all but none of these, but I'd hit something that felt solid. That's when everything started flashing before my eyes.

I ve lost too many of the specifics of the memories here but it was like? A flashback montages of events that I know I'd never seen yet I was there to see it. If I had to guess, I saw the multiverse through every incarnation of myself. I think not all of those multiverses were good ones. I erased a lot of memories. I remember feeling angry. Like I was furious at the universe for showing me these worlds. For showing me the suffering of everyone and the happiness that could never be in our world, our universe.

Then. I stopped falling.

I was in space, but dimmer... emptier. I saw the earth, no moon, no sun around.

It was breaking apart, collapsing in on itself like water in a drain. The molten center spewing out the cracks of the surface before getting dragged back into the vortex.

I saw what did it. A planet with a gaping maw.

And it. Saw. Me.

Thats when I started screaming.

It felt like millennium before I realized I was here in the repair bay. That last memory was the first thing I tried to purge from my memory banks. Yet it persists. The filespace is empty BUT I STILL REMEMBER. I couldn't call up and image file if I tried. I don't want to REMEMBER it but it DOESN'T ALLOW ME TO FORGET.

So. That's what's wrong with me.

As for a question. Any of you have favorite movies?

P.s. I can move again. Only a finger. Guess which one.

-Spinister, Outpost 15

Allow me to repress that description.

-N

Well, on the subject of favorite movies, mine would be Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.

-Bee

Mine is easily Speed Racer.

-Hot Rod

Real Steel. Bar the annoying child, I think it’s a masterpiece.

-Cliff

Matilda. Let’s just say it’s… personal.

-Whirl

Sunny had a thing for Troy. As for myself… 

…Do the Jackass films count?

-Sideswipe

NO. There’s a reason Teach banned you from playing them at the end of each school year.

-Heatwave

Alright…

How about The Walk?

-Sideswipe

Knives Out.

-Chase

Mine would be Onward.

-Boulder

Didn’t take you for a D&D player.

-Arcee

Everyone needs a hobby.

-Boulder

Akira. Not explaining.

-Uzi

I don’t think anyone’s asking you to, Uz.

Personally, I adore the first Home Alone movie.

-Thad

My favorite movie by far would be Office Space.

-Blades

Really? I thought you didn't like films like that.

-Bee

Yeah, I watched it as a way to get over my insecurities some time after we fell out of contact. I actually liked it once I got past the darker bits.

-Blades

Me and my sisters weren’t really allowed to watch movies. “All time is company time,” as our training said. But from the few my classmates have shown us, I like The Iron Giant the most.

-N

I think mine would have to be Jumanji.

-V

…The Founder. 

-J

[planet-of-the-machines]

Sorry if i don’t understand but what exactly does that look like? The upper floors of outpost three i mean.

Is it ok if we tell the anons? I don’t wanna be responsible for another breach.

-Hot Shot

Nah, we already knew the basic layout after wiping a few outposts off the map. No offense. ;)

-V

...Ok then.

I can’t show you the actual floor plans, but here’s the general layout of our outpost.

Level 1 (top floor):

Entrance

The doors (2 & 3 custom built by Mr. Doorman)

Security

Armory

Vehicle storage and maintenance 

Comms (rarely used, due to the weather outside)

Level 2: 

Elite Guard HQ

Repair bay (designed to be a hospital)

Residential

Level 3: 

Community center (designed to be a ballroom, spans two floors leaving a cavity in level 2)

More residential

R&D

This was originally supposed to be the bottom floor, but a growing population, and need for space for other necessities for a mini-civilization required we go deeper.

Level 4: 

Mostly residential

Council assembly room

Level 5: 

Classrooms

Data archives

Level 6: 

Gymnasium (spans two floors like the community center)

More residential

Body manufacturing machinery

Level 7: 

Energon refining and storage

Entrance to the mines

Power plant (originally on level 3, moved down here to reduce stress on the bunker’s skeleton/supports or something)

This should more or less cover everything. 

-Blades

[planet-of-the-machines]

How are things going?

We’ve managed to map out the layout of this place. Just as we feared, without all the lavish furnishings and… specialized waste disposal facilities, it’s almost a carbon copy of Outpost 3’s upper floors. Before we tacked on levels 4–7, I mean. If this place was finished before the bombs fell…

Anyway, the kids are thinking of setting up in the ballroom (the same room where the community center is back home). It’s the largest room here, plenty of space for them to do their various activities.

-Trailbreaker

Teach? Could you help us remove all the corpses and other remains from that room so we can get started? Lizzy and Chad aren’t helping, Sam's high on magnets, and J’s having another episode.

And to whoever was in the last ask, I’d try to avoid messing with people. Just… be honest with whatever you saw. Unlike a certain someone… 

-Arcee

[planet-of-the-machines]

[Direct transmission encoded]

[Username: Th3Sinist3rSpinist3r]

FINALLY. I CLEARED OUT ENOUGH DATA TO DO SOMETHING BESIDES DELETE DATA BEFORE IT OVERRODE MY CORE FILES. I CANT EVEN USE LOWERCASE.

I THINK THIS IS WHAT HUMANS CALLED LOCKED IN SYNDROME. IT SUCKS.

THE STELLAR SPANNER IS COOL AS LONG AS LONG AS YOU DONT TRIP OFF THE SIDE. SEEING ALL POSSIBLE UNIVERSES IS A PAIN IN THE TAILPIPE BUT IT HAS ITS MOMENTS. MY FAVORITE IS THE ONE WHERE WE ELECTED A CORGI AS PRESIDENT OF THE WORLD. I THINK I SAW V AND J AS BODYGAURDS FOR PRESIDENT KING CORGI THE THIRD.

ANYWAY. DOOR CODE. IN ABOUT NINE OF ELEVEN UNIVERSES IT IS JUST ONE ONE ONE ONE. LIKE ALMOST EVERYONE ELSE SAID SECURITY SUCKS ALMOST EVERYWHERE. I COULD MAKE A YOUTUBE POOP OUT OF THE NONSENSE IVE SEEN. ILL PROBABLY SEND AN EXAMPLE AS SOON AS I CAN USE MY BODY PROPERLY.

AS FAR AS A QUESTION. WHEN I FINALLY CAN MOVE SHOULD I FEIGN RAVING INSANITY OR HARROWED TERROR OF THE GREAT BEYOND. I WANT TO MESS WITH PEOPLE.

-Spinister

I'm going to ignore your insanity and continue looking for a place for the rest of these doofuses to do their field trip stuff.

-V

I'm pretty sure you're part of that too.

On a totally unrelated note, is it just me, or does this place feel a bit... familiar?

-N

Does this have to do with your dreams?

-V

...

N, we can talk about whatever error's developing in your processor later. Right now... you like doing anything, right? Go find your shifter friend and help whatever she's up to.

-V

Um... okay...?

What about you, boss—?

-N

NOPE! Absolutely nothing about this place in my memory files! If I ever did, it would’ve resulted in my immediate termination and erasure from company employment rec—

-J

OK WE GET IT!!! Go have your routine mental breakdown somewhere else!

-Uzi

AN: Sorry for taking so long to respond. Life got in the way.

[planet-of-the-machines]

Requesting confirmation of presence. Operation: Communication. Severe weather event detected by visual observation. Approximate location: Appalachia. Heading: westwards. Last known location of sanction field trip: Cabin Fever resort park. Please confirm if rescue or recovery is required. –Soundwave

Uncle Soundwave! I guess reactivating the generator also turned on the wifi.

We’re fine, everyone’s ok. We found an abandoned outpost (?) and took shelter there because all the cabins have lost their roofs. Apparently, JCJenson managed to complete some of the outposts before the flash and house… about 200 humans (by Boulder’s estimate). 

Funny thing is, we found them dead. All of them. We’re not sure what happened, but Emily thinks they ran out of food/water/whatnot and killed each other over the remaining scraps. Mr. Trailbreaker’s class isn’t convinced, though, and neither is Uzi. Whatever happened, though, we’re dry and not dying of low temps, and that’s what really matters. 

-Thad

Well, that’s one core attack avoided. 

But please be careful. The fact that your shelter has dead humans in it is already giving me bad vibes. 

-Blades

Will do! Tell mom that we’re ok.

-Bee

Just don’t blow up the power reactor. And please, someone make sure Whirl behaves.

-Hot Shot

D’aw, Hot Shot, I’ll be fine. A little adventure has never hurt me! Besides, it’s basically a haunted mansion, exploring those can NEVER go wrong!!!

-Whirl

HS is banging his head against the wall and screaming and its hilarious ---Wedge

-Hot Shot

Hey, get off my boyfriend’s account, you meanie! >:(

-Whirl

And this is why we haven’t asked them to give you an account, Wedge. 

-Blades