plmrz

[plmrz]

𝟬𝟬𝟭. 𝙞 𝙬𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙪𝙥 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙘𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙜𝙧𝙚𝙬 𝙪𝙥, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙚 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙖 𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙠 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙡𝙙 ...

the rain always falls hardest on reaping day, breaking through the humidity and pelting thick and hard against the stone steps of the justice building. for van, just shy of ageing out, it's a tedious formality.

they were ten or so years old when they first saw the sickness in their mom. shaking hands shattered glass. an unseen sickness, lurking in the empty space between the tv and the liquor cabinet, eating up their meagre earnings and forcing van's name into the draw again, and again, and again ...

so when their name is called, it shouldn't come as a surprise — but it does. the world takes on a dreamlike quality. their shirt and hair stick against their skin and they squint through the downpour as people step aside, carving a path toward the stage where their escort stands beaming, hand outstretched, grinning like a wolf in the dark.

𝟬𝟬𝟮. ... 𝙬𝙚'𝙡𝙡 𝙬𝙖𝙩𝙘𝙝 𝙩𝙫 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙩, 𝙥𝙪𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝 ...

the woods stretch on forever, and so do the games. weeks turn to months. seasons change. blistering heat turns to freezing cold. the tributes, having formed tenuous friendships in an act of defiance, and having survived against all odds, grow impatient. paranoid. they fear they've been somehow cut away from the rest of the world. a limb turned black by frostbite, severed and preserved. something has to give. but there are no mutts. no drones. no capitol engineering to spare them from their misery. just the trees, and the quiet.

we hear the wilderness, and the wilderness hears us.

back in the districts, the screens turn black. the official story is an earthquake — contact with the arena, and with the tributes, suspended indefinitely. the power is ' out ' for two weeks. the last scene broadcast is a fever dream of fire-side festivities, guttural screaming, and the bodies of the dead roasting over the fire. by the time it resumes, a lone victor remains.

[plmrz]

I have no words

[plmrz]

" i haven't told them about us. " @likehaunting101

jackie's been in the car for less than ten minutes when she blurts it out, unprovoked. van, who's been trying to parse the awkward tension for the better part of that ten minutes, exhales an audible sigh of relief. no looming break-ups, no cheating, no terminal illness or rush week cult activity — or none of note, at least.

they turn their body slightly towards her and raise their eyebrows. " okay. " the vowel sound is pulled out like it's been extracted by force; like pulling teeth. " i didn't ask, but that's ... " and what is that, exactly? good to know? not really. it feels a bit like a conversational dead-end. logically, they should say something or feel some sort of way about it, but all they can think in the moment is — well, yeah, no shit.

they clear their throat and turn their gaze back to the road, crawling from rutgers to wiskayok with the growing sense that this is going to be a long drive. " do you want to, like, talk about it ... ? "

[plmrz]

bringing this back again

sliding a shipping call out there while i try to write things

[plmrz]

it's closing in on 8PM. the air is hot and thick and sticky, and with their mom having abandoned them in pursuit of a dive bar and a dance floor, it seemed as good a time as any to branch out, sample from the little plastic baggy they've kept stuffed in their sock drawer since new year, and just say ' maybe ' to drugs.

only now they've been listening to nothing compares 2 u for either seven hours or forty minutes, hard to say for sure, and they can't stop crying. not bawling or sobbing, just letting the tears and snot stream down their face in a river of viscous fluid and regret. they can't call tai, 'cause tai would want to know why they're crying. and given the direct causal nexus between the fact of them crying and the fact of taissa turner's existence, this is a non-starter.

instead, they call the one friend they know won't judge. the one friend who knows about the situation with taissa. not the details, just enough to have gleaned that there's something going on there. conveniently, she also happens to be the friend that lives a brisk, six-minute walk across the trailer park.

" nat, " they whisper into the landline, cradling the receiver with two hands and trying to sound at least somewhat like a sane, normal person. " i think i fucked up. i think i'm fucked up. "

" just stay put, i'll be over in a minute. " @sc4torccio

[plmrz]

🐝  *  ―  𝑷𝑳𝑨𝑻𝑶𝑵𝑰𝑪 𝑺𝑬𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑵𝑪𝑬 𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹𝑻𝑬𝑹𝑺.

❛  you've been my best friend for years, what made you think it would change now?  ❜ ❛  i'm always here for you if you need me.  ❜ ❛  well, that's what friends are for.  ❜ ❛  remember, i'm always just one call away.  ❜ ❛  how long have we known each other now? i know you better than you know yourself.  ❜ ❛  you're an idiot most of the time, but you're my idiot.  ❜ ❛  do you want to come over and watch movies tonight? i could use some company.  ❜ ❛  you always know how to cheer me up.  ❜ ❛  i made you your favorite food.  ❜ ❛  i know it's 2 a.m. but i really need someone to talk to. are you awake?  ❜ ❛  remember when we used to build blanket forts? let's do it again.  ❜ ❛  please come to this family dinner with me. my family already loves you and i need some neutral person there with me.  ❜ ❛  here, i got you something. i saw it at the shop and it reminded me of you.  ❜ ❛  do you remember that promise we made to each other when we were kids?  ❜ ❛  i'm so grateful to have you in my life. you mean the world to me.  ❜ ❛  i don't need advice right now, just a friend to listen.  ❜ ❛  you're the best friend one could ever ask for.  ❜ ❛  hey, umm ... thank you for being my friend.  ❜ ❛  you don't have to go through this alone. i'm here for you.  ❜ ❛  want to grab a coffee and catch up?  ❜ ❛  we may not talk every day anymore, but i still consider you my friend.  ❜ ❛  i can stay and help you finish this if you want.  ❜ ❛  you've got this. i believe in you!  ❜ ❛  how about we plan a game night this weekend?  ❜ ❛  do you ever wonder what our lives will be like in ten years?  ❜ ❛  no matter what happens, you'll always have me.  ❜ ❛  you don't have to pretend with me. i like you just the way you are.  ❜ ❛  consider it ... a little friendly competition.  ❜ ❛  thank you, you always know how to make me laugh.  ❜ ❛  i can't believe how far we've come together.  ❜ ❛  just stay put, i'll be over in a minute.  ❜ ❛  i've got us tickets for that concert/movies/exhibition you wanted to go to.  ❜ ❛  how about a road trip? just like old times ...  ❜ ❛  i really appreciate you staying in my life all these years.  ❜ ❛  i don't know what i'd do without you.  ❜ ❛  you can tell me if something is bothering you.  ❜ ❛  race you to the end of the street!  ❜ ❛  bet you can't beat me at this game. i'm a pro.  ❜ ❛  i challenge you to a cooking contest. loser has to buy dinner for the next week.  ❜ ❛  you've been such a great friend, and i just wanted to say thanks.  ❜

[plmrz]

PROMPTS FOR PRE ESTABLISHED CONNECTIONS AND CREATING HISTORY BETWEEN CHARACTERS *  assorted dialogue for giving your characters a history and giving them past things or events to talk about, adjust as necessary

do you remember what i told you last time?

have you been doing well since i saw you?

that's not what you told me back then.

when was the last time i saw you?

you were shorter then.

i'm picking the restaurant this time.

we've known each other since we were children.

always knew i could count on you.

that time was different. this is worse.

you're not going to let me live that down, are you?

i seem to remember a conversation we had back then.

so you changed your mind about it?

do you remember our encounter in paris?

you should know me by now.

am i the only one that knows the truth?

we had a lot of help back then.

your mom told me to look out for you.

you just love bringing that back up to annoy me.

maybe don't mention my past indescretions?

this was never going to work out between us.

i told you not to get attached.

i know more about you than you think.

i was there, remember?

i'm not about to forget all the shit you put me through.

you told me you were going to try and make this work.

remember what i said to you?

the last time i saw you, things were good between us.

you never mentioned this before.

that was the longest flight of my life, and you made it worse.

can i still trust you after all that?

at least we tried to make something work.

we never discussed what happened between us.

okay, but i'm driving the car this time.

i haven't forgotten what you said last week.

i'm still thinking about your comment.

i didn't realize it was you when i first saw you.

you seem to make a lot of enemies around here.

there's not much for us to talk about.

we worked it out last time.

i know you far better than you know yourself.

we have a long history.

is that the shirt you were wearing last time?

what don't i know about you?

i haven't told them about us.

you were the only person i could go to.

you know me.

this is bigger than both of us.

i can't stand your driving.

are you taking me to the place we had dinner last time?

that's not at all what you said.

didn't we agree on that?

i thought i made it very clear where i stand.

are these the same people that came after you last time?

are you still going on about it?

can we talk about it?

staying silent about it won't help.

you're the only person who knows the real me.

this is a bad time to talk about your problems.

[plmrz]

there's a laugh taissa does these days — or maybe it's a laugh taissa has these days. it's clipped. professional. van's heard it on tv, when they're held to ransom by their borderline masochistic interest in their ex-girlfriend and her picture-perfect, nuclear family. hearing it in person makes their nose scrunch up.

at least allie's there to provide some plausible deniability. no tai, it's definitely not your corporate lizard-person persona that's making my face like this.

" right," they grimace, wiping their mouth with the side of their palm and casting a not-so-subtle glance to where allie is draped languidly over the other side of the bar. " 'cause she thinks two or three degrees of proximity is her golden ticket to a book deal. " that, or she thinks she can coax their secrets out over a bottle of white zinfandel and pack of marlboro lights. the adult equivalent of a slumber party. less ' tell me about your crush ' more ' tell me about the crash, hon, is it true you ate each-other? '

" i dunno, " they shrug, peering over at the table in question where natalie, misty, and shauna sit hunched over a tray of tequila shots. " i never knew the others like you did, tai. and it's not like we stayed in touch. "

it was weird, being in the same space again. it doesn't really hit taissa until she hears van respond. it was almost like that made everything feel more real. she couldn't hide from the mistakes she'd made, when the biggest one (which had always been letting van go) was right in front of her. they still looked the same, but with more life experience. taissa wonders if they'd come here with anybody, eyes darting to make sure there wasn't anybody who looked like they were their plus one.

it's not like she should care, anyways. but she was nosy, always wanting to insert herself in other people's business. it's not lost on her that she's the one who is married - it's like a constant mantra that she has to repeat in her head. memories of van were kept away in a box inside of her head and she had refused to even think about it. she couldn't think about what happened.

she laughs, her tone professional and almost timid in a way. she's careful with her words, knowing deep down that she has no right to be nostalgic about any of this. "you know, she would have loved if we referred to her as such. even now." which is strange to taissa, knowing that she was the one who broke her leg all of those years ago. but then again, that saved her life. it seemed like all allie cared about was pretending like she was one of them anyways. taissa doesn't exactly understand that part.

"are you going to stick around?" she ponders, those feelings in her heart bubbling up again. "for the slideshow, i mean." her voice lowers, moving her face a bit closer to whisper. "there's an extra seat at our table. it's better then being stuck talking to randy walsh." it was easy to just talk to them like an old friend in public, that's all their surrounding classmates knew they were to eachother anyways.

[plmrz]

the threat conjures memories of long nights spent toe to toe on a tiny, threadbare couch. dim lights and tv dinners. max is their cousin, but she's always been more like a sister. they've grown intertwined, seldom more than an arm's length or a phone call away. they can't fathom being stuck out here without her — always wondering where she is, what she's doing, and whether she needs a reprieve from that house.

the thought of it sets them on edge. but they're starting to suspect the devil they know might be better, safer, than the devil they don't. and domestic dangers are more knowable than the dangers presented by eight thousand square kilometres of wilderness. wolves, for example. literal fucking wolves.

" wow, " they snort. " guess i better drink up. " but they still don't touch the broth. it's not just their face, though taking stock of the damage in jackie's compact mirror was a tough pill to swallow. it's everything. there's this sense of hopelessness now they just can't shake, and the others feel it, too. it's creeping in. settling over the cabin like nightfall.

" i'll be fine. i'm just, " they pause, searching for the words. " i don't know. i can't face a steaming bowl of plant water right now. "

the guilt is practically choking her . as if lugging around the weight of her dead brother isn't enough , max has decided to shoulder the responsibility for what happened to van , too . it was a last minute decision for max to stay in the cabin ---- in the end she had chickened out & chose safety , leaving her cousin quite literally to the wolves . it's not a mistake she'll make again . in fact , she's been keeping a very close eye on van since their return . their refusal to eat ( or do much of anything , really ) hasn't gone unnoticed , but if max has any say in it , it ends today .

' i didn't ask , ' she announces plainly , plopping herself beside the other . van's face is still a grisly sight , pieced together with thread & a prayer , but she's more worried about the way the light has started to fade from their gaze . there's a hopelessness that has begun to permeate their aura , flickering like a fading light . ' whether you're hungry or not , van , you need to eat . come on . ' the broth isn't good by any means . it's not even filling , but it's something to help soothe the insistent , gnawing hunger . max nudges them gentle with one freckled arm , ' don't make me kick your ass . ' it's a familiar empty threat , a sign of her fondness & outright concern .

[plmrz]

the van of all time. my light. my joy. jackie’s perfect spouse who she drags hiking and makes apple cider vinegar ginger wheatgrass bullshit shots for. i love your van and i love the beautiful little world we made for our barbie’s. your van is so warm and rich and so full of dimension. it is such a joy to write with you and to read what comes from your universe sized brain!!!!

AUGUST the way i saw this and wept !! your jackie and mari are everything, van loves their wife fr 🫶

[plmrz]

van palmer and jackie taylor — friends. they snort, bemused, but there's no real bite in it. " alright, jesus. don't hurt yourself. " they can't bring themselves to say i missed you too. it feels too vulnerable. like lying down at her feet, ripping themselves down the middle, and bearing their goddamn soul.

" something. " they agree instead, casting their mind back to the before times and wondering if they can even really do friends. it's always felt so black and white with jackie. all or nothing. forever or not at all. regardless of whatever else this is, it's borrowed time.

but they're willing to take what they can get.

" two somethings going on a walk down to the stream. i think i can handle that, " they muse, brushing past her to dump their clothes by the open door, wiping their hands on their shorts. " but who's gonna protect me? "

she wanted to laugh, to smile at a jab that van threw her way just like old times. but even with the realizations and the enlightenments regarding their current situation... she couldn't bring herself to truly enjoy the statement.

"i never. SERIOUSLY." she couldn't be more serious about it if she tried -- jackie was a lot of things. a coward, a princess, maybe even a ditz sometimes. but she would never treat van the way she'd been accused of due to her mother's -- what? her CRUELTY? her overprotective nature? her BIAS and prejudice? jackie shifted her weight from one foot to the other, still uneasy and nervous.

"i mean -- now i guess we're gonna keep trying to find a way home and not kill each other, right?" she asked with a weak laugh, arms swinging gently at her sides. "and maybe... fuck, i don't know. maybe now we could actually, like, be friends again? or... something? i just -- i MISSED you, van." words she hadn't been able to say out loud to the other, ones that only existed in her mind and in her aching heart. it all felt so stupid now, so INANE and small compared to their current problems.

"i also have been tasked to get some buckets of water... if you wanna, like, come help. or just... walk and supervise. protect me from the wilderness and stuff."

[plmrz]

we havent written together yet but i absolutely loveee to peek in on your writing and you have such a deep and intrinsic understanding of them !!! like im so excited to write w you because the way you portray van is so so inspiring !!! like absolutely has to be one of my fav van blogs & i felt soso honored u followed me !! much love xx !!

THANK YOU this is so sweet i'll cry! let's make the writing happen ASAP i beg

[plmrz]

where do I start?? your van just exudes so much warmth, and it's so clear that you really get who they are, what makes them do what they do, and how they express themselves. I love that I can always clearly hear liv and lauren's voice in everything you write. van really feels like they've jumped from the screen and straight into your writing, and it's beautiful to see how you've made them yours. <3

steph i'll literally cry, did u think abt that when u wrote this? your natalie is everything!

[plmrz]

it's still snowing. van blinks steadily as they watch it fall, face cut apart by tear tracks through grime — some fresh, some dry. they feel sick. there's a heavy stone in the pit of their stomach, and it marks her grave. here lies mariana sofia ibarra. mari, unshakeable. mari, drawing the queen. mari, dying. and for what? so the rest of them can go home and pretend like it never happened? so they can make up some bullshit story? she died in the crash. she starved. she froze. anything but the ugly truth.

mari didn't die. they killed her. they dealt the card.

they wipe their face and glance right, tensing when they spy a hooded figure trudging through the drift. it's hard to make them out so they sit up a little straighter, readying themselves to go another round with shauna. she knows they fucked with the cards. when there's another hunt, and there will be another hunt, they'll be the one running barefoot over frozen ground — luck of the draw be damned. and maybe they'll deserve it.

but then the hood lowers, and it's not shauna. nancy enters and van shifts on their perch, watching warily as though in fear that she'll give a voice to all the ugly thoughts in their head. murderer. traitor. cheat.

instead: " i pretended everything was fine. i think that just made everything worse. " @hollowvictory

they stare for a moment, confused, then slowly shake their head. " don't do that to yourself, nance. you could've called us out on our bullshit from day one. it wouldn't have changed anything. "

[plmrz]

it's not like the movies. there's no whisper, no easing in. one second it's quiet, van working their thumb anxiously into the palm of their hand as they survey the cards, the next it's like she's right there next to them — solid and loud, like she made it through the winter.

like she isn't a bag of charred bones and a constant reminder of all the things they should've done different.

they stare first, slack-jawed, then scrub their hand over their face and exhale a shaky breath. " oh my god. i'm losing my fucking mind. "

@plmrz liked for ghost jackie!

jackie tries, tries hard to make herself known to van - to be able to communicate with the other - and she thinks she's been successful, thinks she can see it in the other's eyes, but she doesn't have time to beat around the bush. "you can't do this!" she blurts out almost immediately, giving the other zero time to react before she continues. "rigging the draw. you don't - shauna's smart. she'll figure it out. she'll fuck it up. she'll do something. or hell, with how she's been lately she might just convince everyone to hunt you instead." she lets out a sad little sigh. "shauna i - i don't know who she is anymore, but i do know she's unpredictable. either don't do it or you and tai need to have the most perfect fucking poker faces ever." she looks the other in the eyes now. "van. please."

[plmrz]

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[plmrz]

did a silly @haym12tch