ploshansky

[ploshansky]

lowkey missin my old phones lag… this motion smoothing doesn‘t give me time 2 reflect on my choices

[ploshansky]

for as much "app tracking" and "improving my experience" they've got going on i am confident that training a blind and deaf dog to buy my groceries would be a more simple and straightforward experience than searching "iphone 16 case" anywhere on the internet

[ploshansky]

phone's bricked and all of my non-ceiling lights are connected through an app

[ploshansky]

outfit that inspired my previous manifesto post

[ploshansky]

haters and losers will see me wearing brown and orange plaid and say "it's literally july.." but when the first crunchy leaf hits the ground they're like "omg it's fall y'all!!!" like ok so you're not a real autumn lover like myself. the difference between a "fall girlie" and a woman of autumn is that the "fall girlie" adheres to an arbitrary schedule whereas a woman of autumn rejoices during the fall months and spends the rest of the year in mourning. a woman of autumn searches for the pumpkin loaf even though she knows it's not there. she hoards and strategically rations out her scented candles from tj maxx that smell of firewood and baked goods because her only respite from various chemical "fresh linen" scents is the humble "vanilla bean."

[ploshansky]

mom pulled me aside to say "you're supposed to ask weight and height" when my friend told me about her sister having a baby and all i could think of to ask was "how is he adjusting to the outside world"

[ploshansky]

[ploshansky]

Gifted kid burnout is the same thing as a divorced drunk guy at a bar complaining about how he could’ve went pro

[ploshansky]

MY NEW WAY TO HAVW FUN🔥🔥

[ploshansky]

whenever i see younger people romanticize working in a Small Indie Coffee Shop, Not Like Starbucks Or Dunkin it feels like hearing someone say "yeah i can be friends with my ex" fresh out of a breakup in that i can tell that your intentions are pure but this is one of those rites of passage where there is absolutely nothing i can say to you that will actually convey how much this experience is going to change you as a person

[ploshansky]

A Woman lighting a cigarette near a cafe window Gordon Parks, Paris, 1964

[ploshansky]

one more thing on the girls harping on and on about roberto cavalli mobwife 2005 aesthetics "finally" coming back around... as if we haven't been beating the animal print horse to death since 2019 trying to make y2k "happen" like oh my goddd when will we be free. the reason the search for y2k in a "cunty little purse" has lasted this long is because a lot of you have created an entirely different aesthetic based on nothing else from the 2000s besides like. the powerpuff girls, that one photo of paris hilton, lindsey lohan, and britney spears in a car, and edgy ps2 advertisements (that aren't even real btw)

[ploshansky]

something ironic about a cringe-sincerity cycle graphic using comic sans (which i don't think was intentional at all)

[ploshansky]

[ploshansky]

clothes are being held hostage by the largest roach ever hatefully standing right outside the dyer in the laundry room

[ploshansky]

when i think about the first time i watched girls i tend to fault myself for the knee-jerk reaction i had of like, vehemently hating hannah and lena dunham but i really do think of it as deconstruction in that like. it was obviously uncomfortable to have a mirror held up to myself. i had to confront all the ugly, dumb, indulgent parts of me that i swore didn't exist because i was 18 and sooo sure of who i was as evidenced by me writing "i don't chase i attract" in a journal and sleeping and crying and vomiting all the time.. like oh i'm sure you didn't like what you saw

[ploshansky]

suffering through the new episode of the girls rewatch podcast so i can hear lena dunham reveal the meaning.... now i know you're probably asking yourself "how could the no. 1 hbo girls fan, tumblr user @ploshansky, dislike the girls rewatch podcast?" thanks for asking. personally it's never spoken to me because it feels sort of like stolen valor... i've rewatched hbo girls more times than i can count and i'm expected to think these people are unhinged or brave for two or three rewatches? also the way they talk is just extremely grating