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the light beyond the gloom

other beautiful story in book

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i need to befriend some old ladies and men who live by the sea with a wood stove beneath their bedroom.

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writer's contemplative solemnity or da filmmaker's love of beauty and motion in time fo today 😈💯🔥

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i'm considering putting all my other projects on hold and finishing a wii sports resort fan fiction i started in fifth grade that never got finished

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you have to do your do diligence and tell youtube what you dont want

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i do not like charlie rose but at least he makes the people he interviews look really smart in comparison

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but then how would you know who died at the end of white lotus season 2, august hayden?

if there were a thunderstorm every day i wouldn't need tv

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i scheduled this post on august 29th of 2023. idk where my life or tumblr is at at this point but hello.

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Unused and seemingly unfinished music track found in an early prototype of Dr. Mario, known as "Virus" at that point during development.

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merry thismas

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When taking a walk, the focus is not on the destination, but on the company along the way. With someone special, who you love, who loves you, even an ordinary road can become dazzling than ever.

I think walking with dog is different to walking dog.

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if there were a thunderstorm every day i wouldn't need tv

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it is day 6 in philly, but the fifth full day. my adjustment has been very pleasant but it has yet to set in that i'm gonna be here in this apartment for another twelve months. when that sets in i hope it's a good feeling and i think it will be.

the first few days were very productive and standard for the earlytimes of a new move: unboxing, refurnituring, and touristing. i spent quality time with ellie and their parents, who i had only met a day before. we got some delicious kbbq and then went to the rocky stairs, where the clouds were going crazy.

ellie and i were both ready to be on our own by the time their parents left, and so we celebrated by watching peppermint candy over at the philly film center. it was beautiful and sad and difficult and good.

i memorized the wifi password despite its auto-generatedness. i've been applying to jobs but every time i do i feel like i'm dropping a day's worth of cover letter/resume work into a black void that will never email me back. plus the captain at the trader joe's that i intended to transfer to was not in and "won't be in for a while" according to the manager i talked to. i talked to the person scanning my groceries and when i asked whether they liked it here they hesitated and said "yeah it's, good." so maybe i should check out the one on arch street instead or just go full throttle with non-TJ's applications.

my room on day one was a mess and it still basically looks like this. i need a desk but now that there's no car i'm debating just chilling without one. our landlord has said nothing about our broken washer since informing us that it was broken on our move in day, so i still have no clean sheets to put on my bed.

yesterday ellie and i explored south street and went to the magic gardens. it was very beautiful and very cool to walk through. i was a bit tired throughout so i got a dirty chai after and ellie and i watched the barista and some guy get into a fight and then went to a cool bookstore. i had the below-pictured spirally, eye-like bit from the magic gardens in my mind the entire rest of the day.

we watched aftersun and connected with ryan the last couple days. a big thing on our minds is safety and making sure we're walking in the right areas of town when we go to and from the house. boston was extremely safe so this is, though dangerously real, an exciting new element of life to get accustomed to. and today we waited for a man who never arrived to look at our gas meter because it's in the basement that we don't have access to.

now all i'm waiting for is some tea that i ordered and an original nintendo DS i got off facebook marketplace. getting it in a legit retro games shop has been a bit of a white whale for me so i just sucked it up and bought it online, but i'm really excited to have a new system with a backlight(!!!) to play all my gameboy games on. plus i beat link's awakening today too so i'm ready to delve into the 2D zeldas from the DS era.

overall it feels really good to be on my own away from what i'm used to. there's always something to do and i'm usually getting it done because i'm unemployed, which is very good for me at the moment. tomorrow i'm seeing didi and probably la haine, yay!

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taping trader joe's boxes back together for my move feels like retribution for all the boxes i've broken down

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here's what's in 11th to 18th place out of the 33 movies i've watched so far this year

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i missed my substack today because all i wrote was underdeveloped so here's the tumblr draft of it

in fifth grade i was in the chess club. i was pretty good at it, having been taught by my dad and my fourth grade teacher (who advised the club). i made it to the semifinals in the tournament at the end of the semester and ran out of time on my clock because i kept forgetting to stop it after my moves.

i accepted defeat but my advisor asked my opponent if she wouldn't mind if i actually continued, because it was a really interesting game. i got five or ten more minutes on the clock and ended up winning. i advanced to finals on a cheated win.

then it gets worse. in the final round i was going against my very intelligent friend jeff. concerned about losing, i studied plays beforehand and found one that ended the game in like five moves. sweating, i used it in the final match, successfully blindsiding and checkmating jeff in the first ten minutes of the game. my advisor identified the move as "fool's chess", noting, "not that you're a fool, of course, jeffrey." jeff was not a fool. i was the fool.

i won the tournament and since my cheap move left a lot of extra time, we all just played some chess. jeff and i played a much longer game then, for fun, and we agreed that our finals game should have been more like this one. i don't remember who won it.