polychroms

[polychroms]

if you were a deity, what would you be the god of?  ( i’m gonna do this for ray since i haven’t thought about him enough )

THE ROBIN & THE THORN

You would do anything to feel, as emotion is the hill you die on. Romance, love, song, art, film, running around for the hell of it - the things that bring a flush to your cheeks and make you breathless and bright-eyed are what you live for. You're a true Romantic, in the Keatsian sense, and you hold fast to the notion that the connections you make with the people in your life is all you truly have. You probably identify with the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice, and you long to have your reckless, head-over-heels affections returned; to be loved the way you love. When you find a film or a song that makes you feel something you play it until you get sick of it, and you would work yourself to burnout to make something beautiful. As a deity, you're the god of platonic and non-platonic love, of romance, of art in all its forms, of joy and of youth.

tagged by: @solichor tagging: whoever has NOT done this and wishes to... i await ur post

[polychroms]

adding “witch’s enchanted talking cat” to the desired character list in my brain

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goign absolutely mentol over more beautiful stunning show-stopping art of julian & oscaar from dearest meaghan @miscreating i am destroyed with love

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this gorgeous art of julian from @miscreating is going to be in my brain for eternity LOOK AT IT!!!!!!

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Music Link Special 1996, Denver

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— Clarice Lispector, Água Viva

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@metuere liked for a starter with julian

    “he seems to be very taken with you.”

     at the end of a long blue leash pulled taut is an orange tabby, a little overweight and spilling out of his harness - getting his needed exercise in for the day. the purring fur dumpling walks back and forth in front of the stranger’s legs, bumping his hefty weight up against her, attesting julian’s observation. with how friendly the interaction is, he almost believes she could’ve been the cat’s past owner. then again, if not, if even she’s allergic - how awkward that the current owner isn’t intervening. “—if he’s bothering you, i can pick him up...”

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starter call for julian!

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since julian has a verse where he bartends at cheers, here is He being mister uncle to the to-be-softball-lesbian child of sam and diane... ft @aspirinqs herself

[polychroms]

Blur ZTV Nytt 27 Nov 1995

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oscaar.

     there’s a certain smugness in the way oscaar catches his eye, chin lifted. his hands slot beneath julian’s thighs, presumptuous adjustment to the angle of his (welcome) weight. ‘ was there something you wanted? ’ 

    as he settles, one arm comfortably drapes about oscaar’s shoulders, fingertips carding through the hair by his ear; dotingly persuasive, their language is purely physical. “oh i always want something,” purrs julian, close proximity calling for a low and devilish tone, “—but tonight it’s a little less... exciting than usual.” 

    absently he toys with the collar of oscaar’s shirt, an ellipsis to his request. “i need someone to accompany me to this gallery thing. someone’s expecting me to be there. i thought maybe... you could be my plus one.” 

[polychroms]

some julian factoids:

in his early teens, he most definitely identified as a punk and spent a lot of his time away from home, hanging out with other kids his age and older who would have been considered ‘delinquents’ to his parents. this atmosphere was where he was introduced to adventurous and slightly risky behaviour.

his parents weren’t around much through his childhood and when they were, they were often intoxicated or in a frustrated and antsy mood. this is partially why julian is so fiercely independent and self driven. 

he insists on control over his personal life - he keeps his more studious and introspective habits entirely to himself, not out of insecurity, but out of a fear that it might be threatened by someone getting too close and attached.

after his parents’ passing, he spent a couple of years travelling around as many countries as he could access. in each location, he pushed himself to experience as much life as he could manage to absorb.

he is extremely observant to changes - having moved around a lot he avoids getting too attached to things because he expects change. he is always ready to let go, even prematurely - to avoid hurt.

his personal history is a whirlwind of events and different versions of himself that can’t be detailed in one sitting. a lot of it he doesn’t even remember, so he tends not to have any need to talk about it.

he is an ENABLER. he will only take the spotlight if it means encouraging others to do the same. if someone expresses a need, he doesn’t hold them back from seizing it. sometimes this habit can be a bit reckless.

he used to be exceedingly insecure and has worked hard to try undoing that. in his youth he had poor hygiene and found it difficult to make friends, so his personal solitary world is very important to him, as well as all the strides he took to teach himself self care.

he doesn’t particularly care about his day-to-day outfits and will wear whatever is most comfortable and available. however, if he wants to make a singular impression, he will take care to look his best and knows that since he usually looks rather bland it will make him stand out a bit more.

[polychroms]

moody julian casual vs formal lewks

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What do you do with a body / this wild to be held?

Leslie Harrison, “Fifty States: A Travelogue (VI)”, Displacement (via voirlvmer)

[polychroms]

one of the elements of julian’s character i hope to elaborate more on is his experience as a trans person not being within the bounds of a cis narrative - i think there is kind of a harmful idea (and some may disagree) that trans people should have a ‘death’ of their past selves, that they must distance themselves from their past and feel shame and disconnect about it. that ‘true happiness’ only comes with the assimilation into the cis world. the issue with that idea is that it creates a tremendous amount of issues with self identity and almost encourages a disdain for the past self, erasing the experiences from those times. the problem with trying to push trans people into a very limiting binary is that once someone thinks of you as cis, your past experiences as a trans person are assumed and the day-to-day struggles become invisible. being trans is not something the cis world can define. 

with julian’s character i intend to show that he has grown past this shame that was never his to begin with, that he has a compassion and admiration for his young self for surviving in the only terms that he understood at the time, and still sees himself in his youth. that despite all the categories and strict labels that society threw at him, he continued to hold onto himself, even if he had no words for who he was, and he pursued the complexity of that self in whatever ways he felt suited him. 

[polychroms]

julian drag night

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