pooryasabzehkar - Tumblr blog

[pooryasabzehkar]

This image below was taken by Chandra X-ray Observatory; a space telescope launched by NASA which is in operation since 1999. The image was taken in November 19, 2023 and it's got its name as the Christmas Tree Cluster.

It's an X-ray image, so we can't see it as it's shown with the naked eyes. Still it amazes me. This is somewhere in the Milky Way, pretty close to us! I look at it and think "we're in such a crowded universe, full of things!" We don't know what these objects really are, let's not to forget that we're probably just an object to them too, only if there is someone there, capable of observing us from there. That green shade is a nebula, so it's clouds of dust and smoke in the space. Other objects could planets, stars, moons, and other orbiting or traveling objects.

I wonder how you feel about it when you look at it. Would you like to be close to this cluster, far away from Earth just so you can take better gaze at it? Or would this thought intimidate you for not being sure how would you survive if you get that far from your home planet? I know this idea excites many. I wonder how it feels like to be out there. What sounds would I hear? Could someone or something tell me the temperature out where I am since this spacesuit I'm wearing is just sealing me away from anything out there. All I'm hearing is my heart beat and the soft air ventilation between the interior of the suit where my body is and the air tanks I'm carrying. I can't really hear these flying objects around me. But I wonder how my human ears receive their sounds; what the temperature of this spot is. The suns seems pretty darn far but there's not water to freeze on me and my equipment. Is it -1000° F? On Earth we have this thermodynamic rule that says the temperature can't go lower than the absolute zero which is around -455° F. Well, I think that is a universal rule so let me change my guess and say, -100 °F maybe?

If there are some living creatures here, their movements must be as slow as mountains!

I'm too sleepy to bring this text to a conclusion, I trust your perception.

[pooryasabzehkar]

They killed Armita. It was announced today. My heart is broken.

I think about her, who she was, who she had become, what her family had done for her. What she had done for herself. I think about her family. Her parents, her younger sister. A cowardice takes over me when I want to imagine what have been through last few weeks.

It's fucked me up. Can't think straight. I feel sullen, and I'm mad at those who know it and gives no care. What the fuck is with them? Don't they ever fucking get it? I don't mind them being fucking happy, it's their heedlessness that fucking gets me. I know I care deeply. Maybe it's just them, as they are. What the fuck can they do when they don't have the capacity to receive this melancholy? How the hell can they feel morose when their brain doesn't have the capability to produce gloom hormones?

The more you know the more glorious you live, the less you know, the less you take the mental pain.

They don't know yet, their kids might. Or some generation of theirs down the line would start knowing onward. Then they know. Until then, I think, fuck'em.

Armita. I wish you were here. I wish this freaking global society had still a place for you where you could blossom to the very level that you desired. You deserved a life, that's why you were here in the first place. You deserved a life of your dreams, not theirs. They took you from us, little did they know how they gave you to all of us.

[pooryasabzehkar]

Outside of this prison, there's a larger one. You can't be freer as you are.

[pooryasabzehkar]

Today, at long last, I posted a video on my YouTube channel. The acoustic version of the intro solo of Pink Floyd Coming Back to Life. This song is from their Division Bell album, my favorite of theirs. This album is an ongoing story of life which I'm going to skip talking abou lt here, maybe at another time later. I need a lot of words for that.

The song's title, Coming Back to Life, is inevitably woven into my current life chapter. Although I am feeling refreshingly alive, my presence in life is going to be different soon after my military service. It is an advantage to spectate the life before entering it in a different way. I have been observing, I am forming and being prepared. There's a question I'd like to ask people who fit receiving it; if you were to see 10 millenia before, and 10 after from this date, when would you have you liked to show up, where, and as what kind of creature, and a few more following questions depending on the type of the living being they would choose? Keep in mind that there's only one answer, and it's not reversible. So they have to think it out before deciding, only if they ever be able to decide. For me, I might answer this later. Again, not here to talk about this interestingly astonishing query neither.

It's more than a year that I've been practicing the intro solo, a piece about one minute has taken me over a year to practice and I haven't mastered it yet. I need to do it over, and over, and over, until I could end up recording a take that is acceptable enough for hearing or maybe good enough to be uploaded for the world. Even with this current skill I have acquired, I can point out critical mistakes happened within the take posted on YouTube. But I needed a start, even a faulty one if it could be acceptable, just to get me going. It had been months that I had decided not to play anything else until I make a video of the solo for YouTube, and over the past few days when I was watching the recorded videos, I had serious misgivings about posting anything on YouTube with my current guitar skills. But I reminded myself that I had given myself my words, and promise is a promise, I'm not a kind of person who would think of breaking them. Irrelevant to this post, promising could be another topic to write about once.

Anyway, I promised and I fulfilled it. It feels satisfying. I don't have any plans continuing posting music on YouTube after I woke up to the long journey I still have to go on toward the guitar mastery, where I'd encourage myself to share music with the world. On the other hand, I am extroverted soul, I'd like to communicate with the global society in every which way, music is one of them and YouTube seems to be a convenient platform. So I have to weigh out and see. I'd like to share, but I can't see myself sharing garbage, wasting my time and others'.

All in all, I am content and pleased that I got to share my performance. I feel as a burden was taken off my shoulder and set free to practice and play almost whatever I want now. Almost, because I have been thinking about learning Hallelujah by John Cale and adding a quick intro to it borrowing from the Shrek Fairy Tale instrumental. But I can play other things too as I progress through learning the song.

[pooryasabzehkar]

Instagram's full of shit. At least these days it is!

Who's ranting? I'm not ranting.

[pooryasabzehkar]

A suggestion for a global agreement: Let's make our daily bullshit minimized and be a no-bullshit creature again. None giving, none recieving.

Indeed our intelligence evolution brought us to this hight state of bullshit creation and bullshit detection. As a survival response we learned to cover our secert plans underneath a mask of bullshit so that we would be able to fool a rival. And later on after falling victim to a bully who physically seemed to be stronger, again we learned to cover our weakness with a disguise layer of bullshit so that we wouldn't be preyed on again, a method to shit the bully! And as we grow smarter in bullshiting we left this notion under consideration that we might not be the only people who can bullshit, others are showing this potentiality too, so our brain decided to develop a bullshit detecting feature as well by using our own experience as a bullshiter and also those traumatic moments of being a victim to others' bullshit.

Still with all that being said, a great deal of psychiatrists' effort these days in modern societies, is to liberate people from each other bullshit, and of course people's self bullshit as well. Since, it seems to be in our DNA now, once the power of bullshiting is fostered and unleashed, it has no mercy on who it is targeting, that includes the individual too. Hence, accepting this powerful capability, once survivingly useful but now socially and individually destructive, we have reached to the state where we demand no more of this feature, and it could go extinct along with all other harmful traits we have left behind, as unprovoked murder, stealing, colonization. But all of these forementioned still exist don't they? So should we give up on an ideally no-bullshit society, label it a pipe dream and let this toxic trait spread all over our lives until becomes a civilized norm? Or we take action now before we get fully drowned in our bullshit.

P.S.

I decry the use of bullshit, horseshit and suchlike when it is all humanshit. A bull or horse is much more dignified in this regard. They do what they mean and they act out no pretense.

[pooryasabzehkar]

Are you living a glorious life or aiming for a piteous death?