pplnjns-blog

[pplnjns-blog]

I have forgotten that I now have a medium for writing on the computer. I was just about to open up a new Notepad file and then I remembered I made a new tumblr.

Wonderful, isn’t it?

Here’s a question: 

What is it about the sensitivity of touch screens that they (mostly. ok, man.) only respond to fingertips? I have a pair of gluvvies that have some shit on the the fingertips* that tickle the god damn screen in just the right way - so you can play with your phone while wearing gloves◘ . What is this fake skin shit made out of? Well, to borrow a catch phrase from my father, “I guess you could always look it up on the internet.” ¶

Help my fuck - 

I was recently lookin’ into buying some BlooTooth speakers. I have a set of Bose [ad] desktop speakers that are wonderful, and I can plug my phone into it and listen to all of my favorite tunes on a prize-winning set. I thought, “yeah so why do I want this blootooth shit? Am I actually not ok with my phone being plugged into something that ain’t chargin’ it? 

I play out a quick scene in my head: gettin’ hassled by some fuckin’ salesman at Circuit City or something:

sb - Bluetooth, huh? Oh, so it’s wireless. I’ve got some decent speakers already-

fuckin’ moron [fm]: But are they BlooTooth?

sb - Wireless? Bluetooth and wireless are the same thing, right?

NOTE: One common trait of fuckin’ morons is that they think they are smart. For example, this character has a clever answer to this question, which he thought of all by himself: 

fm: All Bluetooth is wireless, but not all wireless is Bluetooth. Bluetooth is a special kind of wireless.

sb - [doesn’t seem excited about having Blootooth in his life]

fm: With these, you could play music from your phone without plugging it into the speakers. What if your doorbell rings? What if you have to take a shit?....with these, you can have the speakers playing music from your phone but you can still walk around with it.

Good grief, I don’t need that shit! [rhyme]

--------------

Footnotes:

* Not all fingers on these gloves have the phone shit on them. They are only on the forefinger and thumb. Sure, (not realizing it until just now) those are the two main fingers used during phone time, but still...is this material so expensive that they gotta cut corners like that? It can’t be that expensive, because the fake skin layers have already worn off. That’s just fine, though, no problem at all, because the gloves  are fuckin’ great, fake fingertips or not.

◘ Of course it’s an inconvenience that should have a solution, but this is where we are. Still, there were enough people who refuse to choose [rhyme] between wearing gloves ¯  and playing on their phones.

¯ Gloves are very underrated, at least by me. I was averse to most cold weather gear until my late twenties, and I have no idea why, for not enough time has passed to give me that sweet sweet 20/20 hindsight vision. Now I’ll wear gloves even when it’s in the 40s ³ because I don’t have to....I’ve been walking around with my hands in my pockets for my entire life!

³ a supplementary link to a YooToob video

¶ am I really borrowing the quote if I’m citing the source? Well, I could use the wisdom presented in that quote to find out. Maybe later (probably not). But I think that if I had thought of and asked that question to any of my elementary school English teachers (high school English teachers, too, but in high school, English teachers taught literature. They didn’t give a fuck about grammar.), none of them would know the answer. 

[pplnjns-blog]

think of

Think of all the different platforms/formats you use to communicate [in any way, with anyone or anything]. If’yer in a high-enough-tech of a situation to be reading this, you likely use more of these (we’ll call em) tools than I do. Yet I’ve still got more than I know how to keep track of.

First thing to recognize is that I ain’t keepin’ track of anything. As I’ve acknowledged elsewhere, it ain’t the methods or tools that are the problem. I yam the problem. But it’s a very small problem, because it ain’t really too important for me. It’s something I occasionally think about, but not often, and I ain’t bothered (...I AIN’T!!!!!) to be not pursuing this task. Is it a task or is it an endeavor? More of a task, I’d say. Maintenance.

So I’ve got my NBs and my TW - both which cause this fuckerin’ clutter that I’m not so sure I wanna have around. One sense of it is the main reason people don’t leave their diaries/(they ain’t no fuckin’ diaries, they’re) journals (caps+!!!s) around for any guest or intruder to be able to take a peek. The other is that I’ve been been to happy about shit piling up - what started as as a combination of a vague anti-materialism and laziness turned into a firm believer in the “no, seriously, FUCK that shit (hoarding, keeping miscellaneous shit around because there’s a chance it might be useful some day...)” mentality after living in the Ave H Rats’ Nest. I’ve already got more than enough NBs filled up to overflow the suitcase I took with me when I went to Armenia for two years, and the collection of filled up NBs is always growing. Do I need these fuckin’ typed out pages? Should I get a binder? I’ll need a whoresload of binders. Should I get a scanner? I’m considering getting both. Binders to keep the physical TWd shits, and scanners to make em easy to organize and find shit etc. Ultimately, more shit piling up. 

Here’s a poem:

This is me 

Electronically

[pplnjns-blog]

...and they didn’t even listen to the shit. Neither did I until a couple of years ago. The radio/tv edits were always very fascinating to me. Much like the various ways movies were edited for TV, the methods used always made me think of a group of people, committees perhaps, getting together and making a list of things from the theatrical release than needed to me altered or removed in order for the film to be shown on TV, and then coming to a consensus on how to fuck with the parts they chose not to cut out entirely.

These were long lasting fuckin-fodder for entertainment and cluckin, on account of some pretty bizarre choices, which upon reflection, give me hope that the censors were not a cult stiff rigid puritanical superstitious idiots and assholes, but people who had to deal with this annoying formality in order to keep their movie relevant and makin’ money, and had a good time with it.

Some examples I can recall:

- In The Big Lebowski: Made for TV, Walter whacks the fuck out of a car with a golf club while he screams repeatedly at a kid who he believed to be the owner of the car (it wasn’t the kid’s car), “THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FIND A STRANGER IN THE ALPS!!!”

- I don’t know what the movie was, but it was something my mom and sister were watching and were talking about at some later point. I want to say it was Little Women or Pride and Prejudice or one of those goddam insufferable Victorian period pieces with everyone wearing all that frilly shit and conducting themselves in a level of formality that I get a headache just from imagining myself doing the same. [footnote: I have never read either of those books, nor I ain’t’ve seen any of the goddam movies or TV shows that were based on, to quote Iggy Reilly, those god damn “literary abortions,” so I may be wrong about those media productions. It’s a shame if that’s the case.

Anyway, the TV used the overdub method for editing out “bullshit” and replaced it with “balderdash.” I remember my mom and sister thinking this was funny because the word “balderdash” was so out of place in the movie. “Balderdash” is a word that sounds very much in place for that Victorian genre. Maybe they were watching Clueless. I’m feeling pretty clueless, myself, right about now.

They had to please the censors, who couldn’t care less about the quality or all the etc.s of the edited version. They don’t give a shit-shinin’ fuck, so long as there ain’t no cussin’, no boobs, no asses (except for babies). Dicks weren’t allowed either, but that wasn’t a common issue. [pulp fiction/little mermaid...something?]

- cont on TW