probably-a-muppet - Tumblr blog

[probably-a-muppet]

I think that the real essence of a 'trans' story isn't actually about gender at all, so much as it's about going through a transition from one state where you're miserable and unhappy and wish for death or feel like you're already dead to another radically different state where...you're content. You're just content. You had something chronically wrong with you, like a painful screeching that just becomes the background noise of your existence and then...it's gone. You are, in some ineffable cosmic sense, where you belong.

[probably-a-muppet]

STOP!!! being in other countries. I wanna! Hang out >:(

[probably-a-muppet]

[probably-a-muppet]

Gay asf to be a dentist. Why you wanna drill another man??? Why you wanna make him scream? Why you wanna put your hands in his mouth? Anyway I’m here to shoot you because you’re mistreating your girlfriend who Im in love with and I need fresh human blood to feed my gaint talking plant from outer space

[probably-a-muppet]

*me talking to a guy with a penis* listen here, penis boy.

[probably-a-muppet]

This meme gets thrown around a lot but I do actually think it's less pathetic because asserting your queerness is never something you should be ashamed of even if you can't score

[probably-a-muppet]

[probably-a-muppet]

[probably-a-muppet]

local woman who claimed she will "cross that bridge when she comes to it" arrives at said bridge

[probably-a-muppet]

Are acts of service really your love language or have you just internalized that love is a reward for being useful to someone

[probably-a-muppet]

"irreversible side effects of HRT" all of life is irreversible. i cannot go back a single second in time

[probably-a-muppet]

i have normal thoughts and feelings about mandibles. you can trust me.

[probably-a-muppet]

i think we should remind musicians they can absolutely make up little stories for their songs btw. it doesn’t have to be about them at all. you can invent a guy and put him in situations to music. time honoured tradition in fact.

[probably-a-muppet]

it's so fucking cool that like. in addition to making me a pretty girl, transitioning has also made me happier and kinder and more able to talk about my life and my feelings and my relationships and my wants and my needs and like. i'm a better person now? both in how i interact with other people and the world and also how i treat myself?

[probably-a-muppet]

Noted, swallowing large amounts of semen is magical practice because it requires willpower and also semen is magical

Anon that is truly and unironically a large part of many 20th century ritual magic practices.

[probably-a-muppet]

being obsessed w a piece of media is so scary. what if my mutuals see how insane i go about it and think oh i gotta check out what this is about and then think it sucks and kill me with rocks. what if they hate my favorite characters

[probably-a-muppet]

fangs in your femoral artery friday, even