purityandbeans

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Bring the light back to us…, Photoshop illustration by Ben J

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[purityandbeans]

why is mike tyson hopping out of a two decade retirement to fight jake paul

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Audio Book Production

I have been trying to work with this guy and he started saying he was sick a few weeks ago.

Right after I asked for a certain thing to change with the way he reads, (ie. pauses in the wrong places, inflections on the right words)

I listened back to some of the clips he's sent me and I started noticing a lot of the signs they say to look for when trying to figure out if someone is using AI for their voice, and I guess the reason he says he's sick is because he can't get his AI program to do what I want it to do.

He was supposed to have finished sending me the recorded book by oct 31, (it is now Nov 12)

Like he literally signed the contract, and now, for the past few days he hasn't been responding to any of my messages. So it's sus. And I'm 99% positive he's using AI. I went to his page where he advises himself and each sample audio he has provided sounds different, he's not consistent and I'm just upset.

so I asked my younger siblings to help me write the email I would send him in order to fire him. I want him to feel like he's been called out by a child, so I asked them to use all the Gen-Alpha slang they could think of. Here is the result.

Tristan Stone. I hope you are doing well, homie. You did not lock in according to my standards, and unfortunately, I'm crashing out. You are an opp, and I don't want you here. You've triggered the wrong Gen-Z'er. You are too Skibidi for my Sigma story, and I must choose a more alpha male to be my narrator. I apologize, but this book is Mad Lit and fire for real. You are not cooking, and you sold. TBH, your voice is sus and low-key giving AI. You have big negative aura, and give me the ick. ugh brother, UGH. Respectfully, *insert name*.

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yeah i'm mad

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Hana-Rawhiti Kareariki Maipi-Clarke, the youngest MP in Aotearoa, starts a haka to protest the first vote on a bill reinterpreting the 1840 Treaty of Waitangi

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the lesson I'm taking away from this election is not that the Democrats need to become more left wing or more right wing but moreso that they need to find a way to cater their rhetoric towards people who genuinly have no idea what is going on. the target audience for every speech and political appearance should be someone who doesn't know what the three branches of government are because they were drawing a Cool S during high school civics

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X

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women & bitches love my cavern

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Chai tea bag + lil but of brown sugar + apple cider packet + 16 oz. mug of hot but not quite boiling water

it will not Fix You but like. maybe. maybe.

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"syntax error: unclosed if at line 56": perfect error message, tells me exactly what I need to fix and exactly where to look for it.

"memory write failure at address 0xeb008a": good error message. describes the problem well enough to enable troubleshooting by an experienced user.

"something went wrong, please try again": bad error message. does not tell me anything useful.

"oops! something blooped! 🙁": I will kill you with my bare teeth

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[purityandbeans]

legit the best advice i can give you: feed your friends

any time someone is in any kind of crisis or upheaval, offer to feed them. tell them they don't have to choose what it is if they can't make decisions, just ask about allergies and preferences and tell them you're just gonna make food happen at their house.

friend having a baby? delivery gift certificate to order food to the hospital after the kid shows up.

someone's relative passes away? offer to make them dinner.

buddy gets laid off? ask if you can order them lunch.

pal stuck in a depressive episode? offer to drive them to fucking mcdonalds, if that's what they want.

people in crisis are tired and sad and angry and the last thing most of them are doing is thinking about feeding themselves. so if you have the ability or time or money, providing that is always, always a good move.

legit i do this all the time, and it is 100% always appreciated. i have taught all my friends that when something happens, we feed each other. it makes people feel extremely cared for, and I cannot recommend it enough.

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Damn what if you told your dad he mispronounced a word during a zoom meeting and he disowned you for embarrassing him and told you you were only welcome back home if you found bigfoot so you spend three years travelling the world to find bigfoot but along the way you become friends with bigfoot and teach him how to fight so he beats up your dad for you

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[purityandbeans]

titillating