purpleunicornladh

[purpleunicornladh]

Nineteen. (Part 1)

Summary: a sexually frustrated middle aged man and horny nineteen year old, what could go wrong? 

Characters: Chris Pine x OFC

Warnings: Younger Girl, Sex; Language, Bluntly speaking about sex. You know, all that stuff.

Requested by.. well two anons:

I decided to combine the two requests, i thought it was something more fun. 

Part 2. 

Keep reading

[purpleunicornladh]

Interviewer: What’s your approach to the ageing process?

Chris Pine: I’m kind of into it. 

[purpleunicornladh]

[purpleunicornladh]

Sometimes the help you need isn’t the help you want. Call 1-800-273-8255 if you’re thinking of suicide.

[purpleunicornladh]

Follow me on twitter

[purpleunicornladh]

cop: can you describe the woman who stabbed you

male author: lithe, spirited, outgoing, and not afraid to speak her mind. she was a raw sexual force and she knew it. she was dandelion fluff on a summer day, gone in an instant, leaving you with nothing but the memory of her touch and the faint taste of strawberries on your lips

[purpleunicornladh]

Don’t fear your kinks Masterlist

Summary: After satisfying her vamp kink Dean and Y/N want to try any fantasy they were holding back for too long. We follow their journey through their kinks.

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Warnings: smut, unprotected sex, kinks, handcuffs, spanking, hairpulling, breeding kink, roleplay (including consensual non-con), fake knotting, fake claiming, biting

@m-winchester-67 inspired me to make a series out of my one-shot so here we go with the roleplay kinks. Thanks for ruining me, hun.

Please be aware this is not a regularly update series. I will add a chapter if I got some spare time to write plotless smut. ;)

Part 1 - Love bites hard (Vamp kink)

Part 2 - Don’t be scared (virgin Dean/age gap kink)

Part 3 - Take me away  (Kidnapper kink)

Part 4 - Cheer me up (Coach/Cheerleader kink)

Part 5 - Clean this up! (Maid/Earl kink)

Part 6 - Darkness awaits you (demonDean/virginAngel kink)

Those chapters have no specific order. It’s just a listing of the kinks to come. I’ll write whatever inspires me first. ;)

Knot me baby (Werewolf/Alpha kink)

Arrest me Officer (Cop kink)

Where is the fire? (Firefighter kink)

You don’t need clothes (Stripper kink)

Dr. Sexy at your service (doctor kink)

I’m all yours soldier (Uniform/Marine kink)

Pimp my car (Mechanic kink)

Miss Y/N to my office, please (secretary/boss kink)

Teach me, Professor (Professor/teacher kink)

Every step you take (Stalker Dean kink)

Thanks to @gipsyjucar for the great ideas:

Obey, little girl (Dom/sub kink)

Hunting you down (The Hunter/red riding hood kink)

My sexy bunny (playboy bunny kink)

My white knight (Knight Dean/princess kink)

Bite me (Vampire Dean/bite kink)

We’ll steal the world together (Gangster kink)    

Just feel (Blindfolded/blinded kink)     

Roomservice, please (room boy kink)

Thanks to the anons sending me those suggestions:

Blow your mind (burlesque or erotic dancer kink)

Oriental Seduction (belly dancer kink)

You are under arrest (FBI/suit kink - the dream request ;))

Please hide me (Criminal/shy/virgin/student reader)

Chasing waterfalls (public sex/sex in water kink)

Hiding the passion (cheating kink with age gap)

Hate can lead to passion (bitchy colleague kink/elevator sex)

Private lessons (Tutor Dean/home-schooling reader)

Thanks to @msimpala67​ for another great kink:

Yes, Master (master/servant kink)

Thanks to @moosekateer13 for the great ideas:

Another one, please (Bartender kink)

Love our reflection (mirror kink)

I’m open for other role-play suggestions.

Forever Tags

@donnaintx, @screechingartisancashbailiff, @fallen-wolf22 , @curly-haired-disaster-deactivat, @sister-winchesters99, @mogaruke, @the-is13, @helloitsmeamie203, @strayrosesbloom, @thewinchesterco, @hobby27, @kittycatlover18, @gh0stgurl, @marvelfansworld , @sandlee44, @hawaiianohana31, @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt, @katpatrova17, @notyourtypicalrose , @heyitscam99, @onethingthatkeepsmealive, @natura1phenomenon, @flamencodiva, @echoesofpassion, @cocklesbelli, @anushay1998, @voltage-my2dlove, @kmvld, @fandom-princess-forevermore, @thenamelesschibi, @lauravic, @fandomsrourlives, @wittysunflower, @drakelover78, @lemondropirwin, @chonisberonica, @lonewolf471, @wronglanemendes, @electraphygelectraphyng , @spnhollis, @void-imaginations, @jay-and-dean, @shatteredabby, @juniorhuntersam, @helpmeluci

If your name is crossed out Tumblr won’t let me tag you for some reason. Sorry.

 Dean/Jensen Forever Tags         

@spnfamily-thewinchesters, @supernatural-bellawinchester, @butifulsoul125, @lyinginthegingerlocks, @deans-baby-momma, @hawaiianohana31, @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester, @20gayneen, @janicho88, @thefaithfulwriter, @dreaminemz, @negans-lucille-tblr, @sadwaywardkid, @akshi8278, @hhiggs, @midnightsilver16830, @mrspeacem1nusone, @ria132love, @caligraphee, @the-witch-in-silence

[purpleunicornladh]

A black out

Pairing: Professor!Tony x student!Reader

Summary: There’s been flirting between the two of them for weeks. When you don’t do well on a test about the human body, you decides it’s better to show him how well you know the human body.

Warnings: Smut ;)

A/N: ohmygod, I loved this. Absolutely. Loved. It. And a big thanks to @buckysthot for proofreading! I really appreciated it, dear! Reblogs & comments are - as always - appreciated.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Stark.” A little smile is showing, your books clenched against your chest. Tony’s head quirks up from some papers.

“Welcome, miss Y/L/N”, he smirks. As per usual, you take a seat at the front. You never take a seat at the front, but for him, you make an exception.

You were always intrigued by his looks, just like you were today. The brown velvet jacket, falling perfectly over his black blouse. You loved how he always had his upper button undone, a few chest hairs showing playfully. Hair screaming sex – ruffled, a bit grey here and there.

Your friend, Wanda, joined you and gave you a playful wink. She knew you had the hots for him. She would have the hots for him too, if she wasn’t that much into girls. But she always teased you about your little crush for him. She’d say stuff like ‘can you imagine him taking you over his desk’ or ‘oh my god, what if you give him head in his office’. At first, you’d slap her, saying it’s inappropriate to say such things. But you got used to it. She sometimes even gave you new ideas to think about later at night.

You watched him again. Some would say you’re staring, you would describe it as taking him in. How he shoves his chair to the back and stands up with such grace. How he knows how to make the class silent in seconds – something any other teacher failed at. How he turned around to the board, showing his ass – which looks ridiculously good in this pants.

Did you ever act on having a crush on him? Well, sometimes. Whenever you had his class – which was every Monday and Thursday – you would make a little bit more effort in your looks. Instead of plain pants or jeans, you wore a skirt and a cute top. You’d make sure your make-up was top notch and your hair was neatly done.

You sometimes tried to make a flirty comment before or after class. But mostly, you just made a fool of yourself or blushed when he gave you that playful smirk. The same one he gave you when you walked in today. And you noticed you were the only one who got that smirk. But you were also the only one he sometimes joked with or messed with.

“Miss Y/L/N?” He looks at you.

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[purpleunicornladh]

Cromulent : Calum

Summary: Calum is not a fan of PR relationships or his new ‘girlfriend’

Word Count: 18.5k

Warnings: smutty smut smut anger smut

Tropes: enemies to lovers, slow burn, anger sex.

Cromulent meaning: appearing legitimate but actually being spurious (fake)

Character Moodboard

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       Calum stared down at his knuckles, bloodied and already bruising from that morning when he’d received the news. He itched to have a cigarette between his lips, lungs engulfing the harsh smoke, head rushing, body relaxing - but instead he was in a room full of managers, all of whom were discussing his love life like it was a game.

       He understood the gist of what they were saying, and from a marketing standpoint, pimping him out for the sake of song promotion made sense. Some people in the room were making the case that Luke was the obvious choice for a PR promotional relationship, but it was clear that the higher ups were dead set on Calum. Apparently his ‘history’ of ‘speaking against love’ and ‘calling it fake’ made him a perfect candidate for a relationship, as if it was some sick redemption arc and Cal was a real life character,  and management were the writers in the movie that was his life.

       He’d been less than pleased at the announcement from management that he’d even be working with Chloe Sterling, or as she was more commonly know, ‘Chlo.’ She was one of those pop star types, the holier than thou, acrylic nailed, high heel wearing, fashion designer inspiring, model turned singer girls. Well, maybe not that last part, she’d been a singer before she began to model, but Calum knew she wouldn’t have gotten to where she had without a face like hers.

       The news always seemed to be about Chlo. She’d had a fun summer, spotted with Harry Styles, Zac Efron, Timothee Chalamet and the like. Chlo was simply big news, which was saying a lot for someone at the young age of twenty one.

       Calum had met her once, briefly, at an award show. She’d fluttered past him, all false eyelashes, glitter, and floral perfume, and she hadn’t even looked at him. But it had been enough of an encounter for Calum to get a vibe on exactly what kind of person Chlo was, and he wasn’t keen on knowing her better.

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[purpleunicornladh]

Clumsy

Tony Stark x Reader

Summary: You’re in the lab with Tony when you accidentally knock over multiple vials containing what, apparently, is sex pollen from another planet. You and Tony evaluate the situation from there.

Word Count: 2950

Warnings: SMUT, age difference (reader is obv 18+), lil bit of a daddy kink at the end, sex pollen, hair pulling, language, other tings

A/N: WHEW we love sex pollen in this house. i’ve been reading all the fics i can find on it sdjfksjkdsj 

“Tony, what the fuck is this stuff?” You plucked one of the small glass vials from its place in the test tube rack, staring intensely at the purple powder-like substance.

He looked over to see what you were inspecting and immediately rushed over, snatching the vial out of your hand. “Thor says that it’s from another planet. Very dangerous to humans, so don’t,” he frowned at you while placing it neatly besides the others, “Touch.” Backing away and looking between you and the vials, Tony seemed to deem you safe with the chemicals as he turned around.

“Yeah, like I’m gonna drop it, or something,” you rolled your eyes, leaning against the table and gasping loudly as your movement caused the rack of pollen to fall to the floor, all ten glasses smashing with impact. “I-” fuck.

Keep reading

[purpleunicornladh]

[purpleunicornladh]

“I was raised by women. Now I’m raising women. I was always better around girls. I live in an all-female household. I even have two female dogs… It’s funny how that turned out. My girls have the best woman to look up to. She’s the strongest woman I know. As role models go, she’s the best. She’s so inspiring and smart. My girls are all going to be strong women, too. I’m not the kind of male who has to put my imprint on everything. That dickhead kind of thing… It didn’t feel right to me that the woman has to take the man’s name. We wanted to give our family unity. I wanted to embrace her name. I’d rather wear her name on everything than mine.”

— AARON TAYLOR-JOHNSON › b. June 13th, 1990

[purpleunicornladh]

When I first saw these Pine Kissing His Star Trek Family photosets this morning, all I thought was “Awwwwww! This is so adorable!” But after a while, I was thinking “mmmmmmm, somehow this is not very Pine.” He smiles, he laughs, he hugs, but we seldom saw him kissing people like this in public. Some of my fds said maybe he was just so happy to see them, some laughed he was drunk. Meh. Maybe. I just feel something is not right….Then one of my fd hit me so hard in the feels: “Maybe because he need to show them how much he love them, when he still can.”

Pine once said Kirk and Chekov are like brothers. I think Anton and his relationship is the same. 

Touring the galaxy with little Anton… that smile on Pine’s face…..

Then I remember what he said at the Australian Premiere…

……..

I just……..

Now every time I saw Pine Kissing His Family photos, I can’t stop my tears…. ‘I should tell him how much I love him more. I should kiss him and hug him and whisper in his ear. Now I can’t.’  

[purpleunicornladh]

Batman vs Superman was over two hours of two men bickering over who has the biggest brooding cock-I mean, who has the better method of "saving" people and whether or not it's ok for Batman to beat and brand criminals without regarding the fact that not everyone's as wealthy and privileged as his morally upright ass and for Superman to ignore the fact that not everyone's as indestructible as him, meanwhile Wonder Woman over here...

Ok.

Wonder Woman was vastly superior to bvs for two reasons.

-Wonder Woman is actually a likable lady and an idealistic believable super hero who doesn’t spend her entire moving thinking about how she COULD help people.

She charges in, headfirst, wanting to help people she doesn’t even KNOW because she wants to protect the people who’re dying.

-and Wonder Woman was just so much more subtle and less pretentious about its message.

Seriously.

Let’s talk.

Wonder Woman’s CHARACTER is not that she’s cold and heartless and…well, masculine.

She doesn’t EMULATE men.

She doesn’t need to act like a man to be strong.

She coos at a baby and kisses Chris Pine and doesn’t spend the entire movie ragging on women.

She dresses and acts feminine, and embodies kindness, grace, beauty, everything “feminine.”

And she’s also strong as fucking hell.

That is Wonder Woman.

She’s a good person.

She’s not some cold warrior goddess, an untouchable female shaped ideal.

She’s GENUINELY KIND.

She sees people suffering in the trenches and her first thought it, stop what we’re doing, we gotta help.

Chris pine and all of his men?

They’ve seen all of this.

They’ve hardened themselves to the horrors of war and accepted them as inevitable.

But Diana, new to the cruelty of the human world, is disgusted and she asks what’s wrong with you?

What is wrong with us?

We have accepted casualties. We have accepted pain.

We have excused suffering because we told ourselves long ago that we couldn’t do anything about it.

But Diana?

She does not accept that.

She fights, yes. She’s ferocious and she, unlike Batman, doesn’t have a compulsion against killing.

She was raised by warrior women, I mean come on.

But who does she fight for?

The women and children who did nothing wrong.

The injured, hopeless men fighting a war to end all wars.

The entire movie was lovely because all of Diana’s bewilderment at the way humans live was incredible.

She’s shocked at how dirty London is.

She’s not impressed by sex and she’s not impressed by war.

She thinks sexism is strange.

But she doesn’t like, rag on it, because Diana is literally so above it that she just wryly questions it at times.

Like I don’t care what all the whiny fanboys say.

There’s not an overt feminist message in this movie.

There’s no “men are so weak.”

There’s “men are corruptible” but as we see, Diana sees them as worth saving in the end, if only to fulfill her own ideals…

Which is feminist as fuck, I guess, because Diana doesn’t defend men because it’s her job.

She defends them because it’s her decision. Her morality. Her duty.

But the feminism in the movie comes from the fact that she’s so kind.

She breaks down when realizing that Ares isn’t behind it all, that MEN are the ones who are cruel to one another.

She sees the war and it’s only senseless violence to her.

All of the people she wants to help are the victims, and it’s clear cut, to her, who’s bad and who’s not.

But Chris Pine helps her realize that humans aren’t so clear cut.

And so even though she was disgusted by human actions, she still wanted to help the people in need.

I absolutely adore the scene where she’s charging across a battle field to pave the way to the town.

First off, it was so badass watching her knock aside artillery like it was nothing as the men cowered in the pits.

Second, SHE SAW THAT PEOPLE WERE SUFFERING AND SHE DIDNT CALCULATE.

She didn’t do a Batman, where she looked at the risks vs the benefits vs the needs of the many and the few.

She just charged in and did what she could.

Chris Pine told her she couldn’t do anything except help him with his plan, in order to stop the war and save them indirectly.

But Diana is a true warrior with the heart of a lion, man.

She helped them directly, with no nonsense, no politicizing, no planning, just action.

At the end she says love will save humanity?

That’s the kind of feminism Wonder Woman was embodying.

Wonder Woman wasn’t this lone independent operator who sneers at men who try to involve themselves in her business.

She was helped and supported by men, but it was clear that she was the star, the true hero who brought them and their plans together but also gave them a new hope, a new heart.

They were jaded by helplessness and mortal frustration, forced to fight to stand stills and accept human deaths.

She came and showed them something miraculous and wonderful: her power.

But not used to beat someone’s head in with a fucking sink.

Used to do good.

To fight for her morals, which aren’t corrupted by the human world’s greyness, not yet.

I loved this movie.

I loved this movie so much.

DC finally did good and we can stop pretending suicide squad and Batman vs superman were good.

Wonder Woman is the good DC movie.

Don’t even try to tell me BVS was better than Wonder Woman because if you genuinely believe that, either out of pride and obstinacy from all your bickering with marvel fans or out of delusional worshipping of anything DC, then I think you just like watching people beat people in slow motion and uncomfortably lofty , corporate-cut and stylized plots as interesting as watching a landscape time lapse.

Suicide squad was cut to bits by its editors, BVS suffered from some severe Snyder wanking, and justice league, I don’t know, we’ll see.

But Wonder Woman?

Best DC movie since dark knight.

God bless Patty.

I knew we needed a woman in charge to get the job done.

Now direct all sexist comments and sneering remarks about feminazis destroying your precious super hero genre with their “love” themes to my inbox where they’ll be lovingly deleted.

[purpleunicornladh]

Chris Pine plays kiss, marry and kill. Chrises Edition.

[purpleunicornladh]

you can replenish your health by…: drinking water, breathing fresh air, eating a wild strawberry…

you can restore your mana by…: listening to folk music, breathing fresh air applies to this one as well… taking a walk…

[purpleunicornladh]

he ages like fine wine