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"feminine pronouns" can be any pronouns as long as they have a bow on like such

he🎀him

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prisons separating gay couples when they learn two prisoners are dating is an incredible admission that one big reason why prisons are gender segregated is to deny prisoners the right to love

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People are so much more sad, and desparate, and lonely than you think. I have had three incidents in the last four months were a technician I was working with was being either dangerously unfocused (we work with high voltage), or just flat out angry with their coworkers, and every time when I just pulled them aside to say hey, this isn't you, you're nice, and you're competent, so something must be up - what can I do to help - they have responded by bursting into tears. One guy was struggling to get his wife moved into a care home, one guy just got served divorce papers, and the other hadn't slept a wink the night before because his daughter had the pukes.

I haven't spent my whole life responding to people being rude, or stupid, or dangerous with knee jerk compassion. It's a new habit. The first time I did that as the lead for my lab, it was because the guy genuinely was so good natured that I knew something had to be off. But the other two times were just me going, alright, lets see if it always goes this well, and so far, it has. I'm almost 30, and I just figured out that the #1 reason people are shitty are because they are going through shit.

I don't think you have, like, a moral obligation to respond to people being jerks with knee jerk compassion. But it has made my life so much easier the last four months that I would recommend trying. For your own sake. Please.

(I'll step off my soapbox now. Enjoy your Sunday.)

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I guess a more general version of the point is that in the last 50-ish years, everyday language has borrowed more and more of both the terminology and structural features of technical language. This happens for a lot of reasons. But I think it's mostly not a good thing. For one, being abstract and technical is not actually very useful in the messy real world, where concepts are fuzzy and vague and most things of importance are not quantifiable. For another, if natural language borrows too much of the authority of science and the law, it might find that there's not enough left afterwards for science and the law to do what we need them to do.

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I have to finish reformatting everything and adding an updated conclusion, but I'm working on getting this posted as a free guide on my Patreon page. I'm busy as hell today so I won't say exactly when it's going live, but I'm aiming to have it up by the end of the week. Patreon's text editor doesn't like it when I paste in big blocks of text, so everybody cross your fingers it doesn't keep freezing on me.

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"Will she know who we are, in the river?"

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waiter waiter! more homoerotic rivalry please!

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The thing is, even if you were lucky and your parents taught you how to clean, they probably didn't teach you how to clean the stuff you clean stuff with, like brushes, mops, sponges, rags, and so on. Or how to clean your cleaning appliances, like a dish washer, clothes washing machine, and clothes dryer and its ducts (if you have a ducted dryer), or a carpet cleaner, vacuum, Or how to clean up clean messes, like spilled bleach or detergent.

My parents threw away all of these things (even the vacuum cleaners and the dryer) when they got too dirty to function, because no one even told them THAT they could be cleaned. Cost them thousands of dollars over the years.

All I'm saying is that cleaning is not intuitive, and not knowing how to clean is not a moral failing, but it is something you can learn.

I'm going to reblog this post with resources for learning how to clean things and how to clean cleaning things (I'm not at my desk at the moment). If you have any favorites, please feel free to add them in too!

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ideal living situation is what i call the 'sitcom special' : having all your closest friends live in the same apartment building or neighborhood where you each have your own space but can wander in and out of eachothers homes at will, seemingly always welcome and never at bad times. and also all of you only have jobs when its important to the plot.

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BABES WAKE UP NEW MESOPOTAMIAN MYTH FEATURING AN ABDUCTION TO THE UNDERWORLD FOOD OF THE DEAD AND WITHERED CROPS JUST DROPPED

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while I do think there are definitely films with gay reputations higher than how gay they actually are and there are very real instances of queerbaiting....there is truly nothing more irritating to me personally than gay film/tv fans saying a movie or show "wasn't gay enough" and all they obviously mean is "I personally couldn't jerk off to this cos there was no kissing or sex". an obvious example of this is how a lot of white gay ppl discuss Moonlight (2017). But I also just watched Burning Days (2022) a super compelling political thriller about a closeted police prosecutor who moves to a small Turkish town to investigate corruption and gets caught up in a blackmail scheme by the mayor because he's gay and trying to stop the shady shit going on. The tension between the lead and the handsome bisexual journalist who's trying to warn him about all this is SOOOOO palpable I was barely blinking when they were on screen just 👀. They don't technically "get together" because the film isn't a romance but essentially the whole plot is driven by how the prosecutor is so easily marked for ostracizing because he's gay. Tell me why one of the top reviews of this film that has a gay main character in a plot driven by hostility to him being gay and one of the top reviews is "could've been gayer" can ppl please either grow the fuck up or just go watch porn if all you wanna get out of a film is shallow portrayals of intimacy. youse are so boring the way you'll just dismiss the queerness of something wholesale if that queerness isn't the most obvious form of intimacy, or if it doesn't make you horny. and isn't it so interesting how these comments are most often made about LGBT films focused on people of colour??? Transparent. Exhausting.

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nona the ninth

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if youre against body shaming, then you HAVE to be against body shaming men too.

that means no more micropenis and small dick "jokes".

that means no more neckbeard "jokes".

that means no more "jokes" about moobs / man boobs if someone has told you that it makes them uncomfortable (/ dysphoric).

that means no more mocking men (and women, but i see this targeting men more often) with flat asses.

that means no more mocking men for having long hair.

that means no more mocking men for having a "pedo 'stache".

that means not mocking trans men who dont want to medically transition and respecting their boundaries.

that means not mocking intersex men whose intersex variations you dont personally understand.

be against body shaming ANYONE.

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“As previously noted, normalcy bias is the belief that if something terrible were to happen, a responsible party would intervene and stop it, and that if no one is intervening, the terrible thing must either not really be happening or must not be as bad as it seems. The framework of ‘normalcy bias’ relies on tacit agreement about who is considered 'somebody’ and who decides that this 'somebody’ matters. The status of 'somebody’ stands in inverse relation to 'nobody’ - people viewed as so worthless that they need not be identified. But 'nobody’ is out there, rolling their eyes and clenching their fists as the stratified somebodies declare that all is well. "As I wrote in Hiding in Plain Sight, the-oft recited claim that 'nobody saw it coming’ is an admission of whom the speaker considers to be nobody. In the United States, 'nobody’ historically included women, immigrants, poor people, and anyone who is not white. People dismissed as nobody are those most likely to be affected by a terrible situation and therefore the most likely to warn about it in advance. 'Somebody’ is a similarly convoluted category. For centuries, to be somebody in the United States meant to be a wealthy white man or to be treated like one. This idea of 'somebody’ is baked into the founding of the country, in which only white male landowners were granted the right to vote. White, land-owning men who deviated from the establishment were often punished for their efforts: castigated as troublemakers or conspiracy theorists. The goal was to reduce them, at least in their ability to gain institutional support, to the status of 'nobody’.”

— Sarah Kenzidor, “They Knew” pg. 109