queerautism - Tumblr blog

[queerautism]

Every single day people on tumblr say "what if the shit moral OCD tells you was true and living by it was the only way to be a real progressive"

[queerautism]

reblog to manifest gender euphoria for the person you reblogged this from

[queerautism]

If you want to start with something really small and see how you feel about the sensation / if it hurts at all, then work yoyr way up, you can look into vaginal dilators! They come in a set with gradual size increases, and if you take your time working through them you can explore what your body can accommodate comfortably, so it's a lot less likely to hurt or bleed.

I would very much like to use a dildo to masturbate, but I'm scared bc I'm still a virgin and my hymen could break (or, as I've learned, tear).

I've done some reading on the topic, which honestly made me more scared because the hymen being a stretchy bit of membrane/flesh with holes is scarier to me than it being this thin membrane that'll break.

I just don't want it to hurt and/or bleed. I'm very scared of it hurting and/or bleeding.

Okay, anon. So, here's the thing: being a virgin has nothing to do with your hymen. If you've put a tampon in, done certain exercises, rode a bike, your hymen could very well already be broken. In fact, depending on your age, it's fairly probable. [Some people with vaginas don't even have hymens, btw.]

Also, you can figure out if your hymen is intact by feeling at the entrance of your vagina [or even looking]. If your hymen is still intact, you should be able to feel it covering part of your vaginal entrance.

Now, if your hymen is intact, you can still use a dildo. I understand being scared of it hurting/bleeding but not only can your hymen not always break during penetrative sex but as a matter of fact, most people don't feel pain when their hymen tears and those who do usually say its fairly mild.

The idea everyone feels pain when their hymen tears is partially a myth to discourage sex and partially an issue of misogyny and people not knowing/not caring how to properly have sex with their partners. It's not true!

Also, even without your hymen in mind, you could feel pain regardless. Vaginal tears happen sometimes, especially if you're not sure what you're doing and/or don't use enough lube.

Sometimes things happen; it doesn't mean you have to avoid sex. It just means you should be prepared, be careful, be gentle and maybe do it scared.

Some people do bleed when their hymen breaks but its not a lot and if you keep a tissue with you just in case, that should take care of it. Same with vaginal tears.

I understand being scared. It makes a lot of sense, especially with how weird some people can be about hymens. But don't let it scare you out of trying out something you clearly want, especially when what you want is to try a safe activity for fun!

I hope this helps. If it doesn't/you have more questions, lemme know! <3

*There's some transphobic language in both articles, sorry!

[queerautism]

Here's that paper on intersex medicalization I've been working on for the last month.

This paper covers basic criteria for what it means to be intersex and how common it is, crossover between intersex and trans populations and issues, medical misconceptions about intersex surgeries done on infants, the origins of those surgeries, where we are now with the medical community re: medicalization, statistics on mental health issues faced by intersex people, and some goals of some intersex activists.

Keep in mind this paper was supposed to be an informational report for a composition 101 class and that I had to cut back some of my tone and extra details regarding the nuances of intersex identity and queerness. I did what I could with the time and context I was given.

The content I had to read while doing this paper gave me two weeks of mental breakdowns and I'm still super depressed and my birthday is coming up if anyone wants to show support!

CA $fuzzcheeks | PP @ fuzzcheeks | Ven @ novastarchild

[queerautism]

This is definitely also true, good point!

Most people don't discover their kinks through porn, but also it'd be fine if they did tbh

[queerautism]

I feel like a lot of weird attitudes and views about sexually explicit material would be a lot less prevalent if more people had kinks that weren't possible in reality. Like, I see so many wild takes that start out because people don't understand that they can be into something without actually wanting to see it really happen or without wanting to do that thing IRL, and then they apply that attitude to all sexual concepts. If more people were into kinks that aren't anatomically possible I think more people would realize sexual fantasies aren't a 1 to 1 for reality

You might be right! There's a weird assumption from many of these people that everyone who is into something conceptually would also enjoy the real life version of that thing, and it's nonsensical to me as someone who is familiar with impossible to execute kinks. Most people I know with those kinks do end up instinctively understanding the difference between fantasy and reality.

And even with things that aren't impossible, it's totally normal and common to have things that turn you on conceptually, in fantasies / fiction, but that you have little or no desire to do in real life. It's also common sometimes to try a kink irl you usually fantasise about, and discover you don't actually like it as much in practice, just because of practical or safety concerns, or because it simply doesn't feel the way you thought it would.

[queerautism]

I think it's just posting about kink education at all that's the problem

Yeah that wouldn't surprise me at all

[queerautism]

Ohh that tracks tbh thank u

Okay but really. What are the hyperspecific niche kinks I'm supposedly regularly posting about

[queerautism]

I feel like more people might discover kinks through written erotica / smut than porn videos? That would make sense to me since a written piece can more easily 'make a case' for specific kinks, through a more in depth exploration of the scenario, the characters, the dynamic, etc

Or maybe this is just my aegosexual ass relating to things differently. But I feel like I've seen a lot of comments mentioning things like "This made me discover a new kink" or "I'm not usually into this kink, but this is written so well it makes me see the appeal"

Most people don't discover their kinks through porn, but also it'd be fine if they did tbh

[queerautism]

Most people don't discover their kinks through porn, but also it'd be fine if they did tbh

[queerautism]

@r1ngfinger well im glad it wasnt just me that found it super confusing lol

Okay but really. What are the hyperspecific niche kinks I'm supposedly regularly posting about

[queerautism]

Salem has a message

(HE/HIM) 🐇🎤🗣️

[queerautism]

Okay but really. What are the hyperspecific niche kinks I'm supposedly regularly posting about

[queerautism]

I think it's very interesting that after about a week of one of my posts being shared in radfem circles, the version with their additions has moved on to straight up fascists and pro life christian blogs

[queerautism]

Tag yourself, Im the grown adult who uses it/its pronouns and posts about hyperspecific niche kinks sometimes

Also i almost wrote Pronuns. Like and reblog if you support It/Its Pro Nuns.

Lmao nice 💜 love that

[queerautism]

hate to be the one to do this but the user who reblogged your post saying thst they're asexual but have "hyperspecific kinks", is a terf and reblogs from other terfs ("radfems")

It's just a terf trying to use that to describe me as an insult lol

[queerautism]

Fun how they admit they were making up a guy though

"Porn is bad because (something that happens because of lack of sex education)" is such a frustrating and common opinion tbh