ramblingsaboutthewaynes

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

putting this in a separate post + even more silly battinson/corensupes stuff based off this post (and op’s tags)

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

You know those posts about one of Bruce’s kids getting kidnapped and him having no idea which kid they have based on the vague descriptions he’s given? Well now I can’t only imagine Bruce getting the dreaded call and immediately pulling out a guess who board filled entirely with his kids. Like

kidnapper: we have one of your children

Bruce: I have so many of those you need to be more specific

kidnapper: the loud and annoying one

Bruce, flipping down Cass and Duke: that does not help as much as you think it does

kidnapper: well he has black hair?

Bruce, flips down Steph: keep going

kidnapper: uhhhh? He’s short?

Bruce, flips down Dick and Jason leaving Tim and Damian: more specific

kidnapper: he’s been condescending and judgmental since we got him

Bruce: yeah they both tend to do that

kidnapper: he keeps throwing around words I don’t understand

Bruce, realizing that Damian and Tim are significantly more similar than he thought: uhh more specific?

kidnapper: more?? look just wore us the mon— WHERE’D HE HIDE A KATANA???

Bruce: ah you have Damian

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

"a girl is damned if she does, damned if she doesn't" - my professor

if this isn't stephanie brown......................

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

So this is definitely a case of "we did not expect Harvard to fight back and we forgot they have billions of dollars and the best lawyers"

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

Tim: I was awake at 2 am last night and-

Dick: patrolling?

Tim: no, in bed, anyways-

Jason: do you need a new mattress or something? That seems like a bad time to be up

Tim: no?? As I was saying, do we get.. like.. a pension?

Dick: uh? I do I’m a police officer?

Tim: no, for being Robin?

Damian: Drake, don’t be ridiculous.

Tim: don’t get me wrong, Bruce did support us when we were all minors but… what about retirement??

Jason: …holy shit

Damian: father probably has money put away

Dick: I mean…

*Alfred walking in*

Alfred: What is this about retirement?

Tim: ARE WE GOING TO GET ANY FORM OF PENSION??

Alfred: master Timothy, you are one of the least likely to need to worry about that

Jason: WHAT ABOUT ME??

Alfred:

Alfred: Im sure Master Bruce has money put aside for university that… none of you have used

Damian: I could use mine

Alfred: Al Ghul, you are a money tree

*Bruce walks in*

Bruce: Whats happening in here?

Dick: Do we get pension? Or anything for being Robin?

Bruce: uh.

Bruce: Maybe, I put stuff aside for you and Jason, but after you inherited your families money, and Jason died… oh

Jason: …

Bruce: I’ll… start investing

Tim: great things happen at 2 am

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

Tumblr usernames are so funny, "the ghost of jason todd started following you" okay well can he stop

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

"I would kill for you. I would die for you" would you take a break for me? Would you sit down and rest? For a day, a week, a year? Would you let others take care of your needs for me? Would you let yourself be held for me? By me?

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

Damian: I quit Robin.

Tim: You can do that???

Jason: First I’m hearing about it.

Dick: Aww Dami what superhero name have you picked now?

Damian: I will become a doctor.

Dick: …

Dick: YOU CAN DO THAT??

Jason: You’ve done it brat. You’ve escaped.

Tim, still muttering: You can quit Robin? How long has it been?

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

Here’s how timberkon can still win (text from here)

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

Watching Bruce lose his mind over Ra's parenting is the funniest thing I've seen all week.

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

The original "Damn Bitch you live like this?"

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

Hear me out: Robin Dick would be the biggest Bruceman supporter and shipper.

This boy hates any of Bruce’s love interest with a passion because then his dad guardian spends less time with him and that’s obviously UNACCEPTABLE, SCANDALOUS even, so when rumours start circulating that Bruce Wayne is in a relationship with the Batman, he jumps right on the wagon.

Reporter, thirsty for a story: Mr Grayson what do you think about the rumours that Bruce Wayne is dating the Batman?

Dick: What do I think about my dads you mean? My very married very taken dads? My very faithful to each other plural dads?

He would fuel the rumours both as Robin and as Dick Grayson, punching criminals for talking bad about Wayne enterprises as Robin (“THAT’S MY STEPDADS COMPANY YOURE TALKING ABOUT!”). He would be on online forums all day talking about how Bruceman is the only Batman ship that makes sense and Doxxing people who disagree.

Bruce is so exasperated because this is happening at a time where only Alfred and Dick know his real identity so he can’t even do anything with ANYONE without making either Bruce Wayne or Batman look unfaithful.

Throw Reporter Clark Kent into the mix who has been sent to scope out the Bruceman story, who Bruce makes the mistake of flirting with at a gala. Both Clark AND dick are scandalised.

Dick, making a scene: HOW COULD YOU! BATMAN IS WAITING FOR YOU AT HOME AND YOURE HERE FLIRTING WITH SOME… SOME REPORTER??

Bruce, sighing: Dick-

Dick, tugging on Bruce’s suit and looking up at him with fake tears in his eyes: Dad, are you and dad getting a divorce? :(

Clark, panicking: NO NO THEYRE NOT GETTING A DIVORCE PLEASE DONT CRY

Meanwhile:

Bruce, crying in the corner: he called me dad

He would even go as far as insisting that Robin is his step sibling

Principal: how do you explain that whenever Robin is injured, Dick fails to show up at school the next day?

Dick: Robin and I are twins :) so when he’s injured I’m injured too and we have to stay home together!!

Bruce, whispering: I’m sorry, they’re not really twins but neither I or Bats have the heart to tell hem

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

Fanon: Cass loves all her brothers equally even she calls them "little brother" 💕

Canon:

Cass with Dick 🤨:

Cass with Jason 💀:

Cass with Tim 🥰:

Cass with Duke 🥰:

Cass with Damian 😠:

She is not subtle and I love it 😆

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

[Tim and Jason watching Dick as he fakes his death for a mission]

Tim: Man, he really is peak pretty boy

Jason: Right? Like, stop serving while you’re dying. It’s disrespectful.

Tim: For real, like, at least YOU had your priorities straight.

Jason: Exactly, I—

Jason:

Jason: Now hold up just a second—

Tim: I mean, you looked like shit when you died

Jason: THE FUCK, TIM????

[ramblingsaboutthewaynes]

Take a picture, it will last longer