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I cherish him. ๐
danny ramirez , subwayoracle .
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changbin: Strawberry milk doesnโt taste like strawberry OR milk.
minho: Go the fuck to sleep changbin.
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whoever decided to start implementing ads on here that automatically unmute and cut off any music app you might have on in the background as you scroll by should be hunted for sport
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Since all my friends are confused when I say I'm a Cas girl,
I LOVE Dean , I RELATE to Dean, I strive to EMBODY Dean, which is exactly why I am so obsessed with Cas. He's beautiful, majestic and perfect.
I have spent the majority of episodes since he pulled Dean out hell, shouting "Where's Cas?" at the TV.
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It's my 2 year anniversary on Tumblr ๐ฅณ
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Your feelings are valid๐
You are allowed to mourn and grieve anyoneย that has had a positive affect on your life.ย
Five years ago, my sister woke me up with the news of Jonghyunโs passing. It was a rollercoaster of emotions being heartbroken for someone I had never met, will never meet. I never went in depth about how I felt with my family, except my sister, because it was hard to describe mourning a celebrity.ย
It took almost four months to realize that just because I didnโt know him personally, doesnโtย mean that I donโt have the right to feel sad- no heartbroken- about his passing. SHINee has had an immense affect on my Kpop journey and brought, still bring, me so much happiness.
So mourn Moonbin. I know I will. I found Astro in 2018, my first comeback with them was Always You. All Night was my favorite song of 2019 and is one of my favorite Kpop songs ever. Theyโve brought me so much laughter at a time I was going through a lot and honestly, just made me happy with their content and their music. Iโm distraught about Moonbinโs passing and Iโm going to let myself feel what I need to get through this. A Pinterest quote I saw after Jonghyunโs passing wasย โsome things you donโt get over, you just get through them.โ Iโm not over Jonghyunโs death but I got through it. I wonโt get over Moonbinโs death but Iโll get through it. Your feelings, whether youโre an Aroha from the start, an Aroha from the middle, or a baby Aroha, are valid.ย Donโt anyoneย tell you different just because they donโt understand what youโre going through.ย
Check in on your friends but also check in on yourself.ย Itโs almost not said enough but check in on yourself during this hard time. If you need to talk to someone, reach out to a person you trust. If you need to distract yourself, do it safely. If youโre spiraling and think you need help, seek it.ย
My inbox is open. Granted Iโm not a license therapist or medical professional but if having a listening ear, even if itโs a stranger on the internet, can help someoneโs heart feel a little lighter, I would love to be that.
RIP Moonbin๐๐
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I didnโt know if I should post something or notโฆ but, ive been an Aroha since 2018 (the year I got into kpop) and to hear about Moonbin yesterday during my lunch I was very heartbroken and I couldnโt believe what I was hearing or reading. (Im trying not to cry just writing this ๐
) I still feel like this is a sick dream that I canโt wake up fromโฆ I still feel like crying everytime I see himโฆ I cant imagine what Sua, his parents, Eunwoo, MJ, JinJin, Sanha, and those closest to him are going through. My condolences to his family, friends, and all of ASTRO. Moonbin left such an amazing footprint behind. He left with so many people touched and inspired by him. He left with so many people loving him too.
I hope Sua, his members, friends, and Family are given time to mourn and rest
Moonbinnie,
You are very loved by everyone. I hope you are no longer hurting or in pain in anyway. I hope you finally get some peace. I hope you are happy and loved. I hope you know how much we love and miss you
May you rest in peace ๐๏ธ
-Magda (Ramenlixxie)


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i wasnt crying until i remembered the stages of the dandelionโฆ
every reblog to this post is a prayer for moonbinโs sister. a consoling hug to his mother and father. a blowing of a dandelion into the hearts, minds and souls of aroha, rocky, sanha, jinjin, eunwoo, mj, the poor fucking manager that had to deal with the terror of finding moonbin dead in his home.ย
moonbin, i hope with every fiber of myself, my heart, soul and being that your every breath in whatever new chapter, whichever foreign new world youโve just stepped into is free of worry. i hope that you never have to cry again, that throughout your every moment wherever you are now, your heart is unburdened by the darkness of pain, sadness and sorrow.
goodbye my angel- may the stars birthed by the dandelions breathe you a breath of freedom in every moment you shine in the sky.
all our love goes to you, our princeโฆ
~aroha
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
TแผOแE แฏแผO แผOแฏแช
แฐแฉแTEแแชIแT
แผYแแแIแ แญ แทแชแฉแK!แดEแฐ Oแ

โ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ต๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ข ๐๐๐ ๐ฒ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ฑ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ข @parkhabits , ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ 2011 ๐ผ๐๐
๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐. ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐ป๐๐๐๐, ๐ฒ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ข ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐. ๐ฟ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ข ~โก
โ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ฒ๐๐๐๐๐๐/ ๐๐ก๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ข, ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ (๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐), ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐ข ๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐/ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐/ ๐๐๐๐/ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐/ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ฃ๐๐ ๐๐๐ก๐๐๐๐ข, ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ก๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐.
โ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ข ใ ๐ณ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐, ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐. ๐ท๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ท๐ข๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ป๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ข๐'๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ท๐ข๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ก๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐. ๐ป๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ข ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ข ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐. ๐ฐ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ข ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐. ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐?
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐- @peachjaem00 @ramenlixxie
๐ธ๐ ๐ข๐๐'๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐. ๐ธ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ข๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ข ~
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Ay, someone get me the suprised pikachu meme and tape it over my face!! The DRAMA within those few seconds of anger is 10000000000000000000 out of 10 omg ๐๐ผ๐๐ผ๐๐ผ
[4:33pm]
angst | poly!xiaojun x male!reader | requested by @yugiaiโย |ย word countย 475 twย crying, cursing, verbal fights, cheating mentions, near-breakup over a polyamorous relationship
โDejun, what the hell??โ you whimpered, staring blankly at your phone.
โWhat do you mean what the hell?โ he snapped back, โWhat are you talking about?โ
โYouโฆ cheated on me??โ you accused, looking up at him through teary eyes, โWITH YANGYANG?โย
Xiaojun didnโt reply, simply staring at you with fear in his eyes.
โWell?โ you snapped,ย โYou cheated on me, didnโt you?โ
โโฆhow did you find out about that?โ he whispered weakly.
โYangyang never keeps secrets from me.โ you snarled, glaring at your boyfriend with venom in your eyes as you watched his eye and upper lip twitch in silent anger.
โThat little shitโฆโ he mumbled before looking back up at you.ย โBaby, we can talk this outโฆโ
โNo, Iโm sick of you cheating on me and lying to me about it. I canโt stand this relationship anymore,โ you broke him off, your voice deadly calm as you stood up, โweโre done.โ
โWhatโ wait, M/nโโ
โDEJUN, STOP!โ You finally snapped, stepping up into his face in anger.ย โAll you have done since I started dating you is abuse me, Xiaojun! You constantly cheat on me, gaslight me into staying when I find out, talk shit about me to my friendsโ MY FRIENDS, not yours, MINEโ And itโs always with Yangyang! WHY? You know whatโ donโt answer that, just leave, Iโm done!โย
You stopped yourself for a moment and turned away to breathe as you felt your fists ball up. You turned back thirty seconds later to see him still sitting on the bed, his head in his hands, his shoulders shaking as he sobbed into his palms.
โM/n, l-let me explain, pleaseโฆโ he whimpered, coming over and putting his hand on your face, his thumb swiping across your face and wiping away a tear.ย
โWhat?โ you snarled.ย โExplain what, Dejun? You fucking cheated on me.โ
โN-What? No!โ he exclaimed, โM/n, I didnโt ch-cheat on you, Iโve never cheated on you.โ
โWhat the hell are you talking about, youโveย โnever cheated on meโ?? Yangyang called me before you got home from work, he told me about five different times he fucked you!โย
โM/n, Iโฆ Iโm polyamorous.โ
โโฆwhatโโ
โMe and Yangyang were gonna tell you today, but I guess he just felt too guilty to keep it a secret any longer.โ
โโฆI-I donโt understandโฆโ
โM/n, I love him just as much as I love you. I stayed with you for two years, torn between you and him, and eventually, I just couldnโt take the pain anymore. But I didnโt want to pick between you and Yangyang, because I know how much you love me, but I know he loves me too, and I didnโt want to break someoneโs heartโฆโ Xiaojunโs voice cracked and trailed away.
Your heart shattered, you stepped slowly into his chest, wrapping shaking arms around his sides and beginning to bawl into his chest.
ยฉ 2021โ2022 chai saetang.
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theres another gay angsty lucas fic in the works :) <3
YES!!! IM LIVING FOR THIS! :D
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IK BESTIE ITโS PERFECTLY WRITTEN AND EVEYTHING I JUST DIDNT EXPECT IT SO SOON
middle of the night
MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT [Monsta X] G fluff, angst, romance, suggestive,ย lyrical Pย Lucas Wong x male!reader WARNINGS: post-breakup depression, light cursing, self-inflicted wounds, negative thoughts, mentions of blood, implications that Lucas is filthy rich (he is IRL <3 my king), use of tobacco products, pet names (in French!), hickeys A/Nย I changed my song and forgot to fix it on the event page, so yeahโฆ WCย 1,686
+ I thought Iโd never ever need you; now all I wanna do is see youโฆ
Lucas heaved a heavy sigh, carelessly carding his fingers through his hair & pulling at handfuls of the black locks.ย
Why me? What did I do to deserve this? he thought, a sad scowl spreading across his face.
He supposed it was partly his fault; after all, heโd been the one that broke up with you. Heโd gotten so caught up in the weย of the relationship, that he stopped thinking about himself, which led to someโฆ
Self.. destructiveโฆ decisions.
What makes you think you had the right to call yourself his anyways? the snide voice intruded again, youโve always been this way, it wasnโt just the relationship.ย
โNo.. shut upโฆโ he pleaded to himself, in a broken, shaky voice barely more than a whisper.ย โShut up, youโre โ youโre wrongโฆโ
Butโฆ if the voices are wrongโฆ then why did I leave him? Was Iโฆ wrong?
โฆHeโll never take you back, Xuxi,ย the voice sniped, not after what you did to him. You canโt just treat him like heโs the king of your heart and then cast him aside like a dirty dish.
โNoโฆ NO!!โ Lucasโs fingertips slipped steadily and roughly down the wall, the fingers in his other hand curling into a fist, and before he knew it, his knuckles were bleeding.ย
โItโs not trueโฆ I didnโtโฆ Iโฆโ
You never wanted to hurt him?
โOf c-course I d-didnโt! I l-loved hi-himโฆโ he whimpered, pulling at his hair until it burned.
โIโฆ I love himโฆโ he breathed, tears flowing freely down his face. He slowly untangled his visibly trembling hands from his once-silky, slicked black hair, looking blankly at his fingers. For the longest time he simply stared; it was a coonโs age before he noticed theย
Lucas too slid down the wall, deliberately slamming the back of his head into the wall in an effort to make the pain go away, then did it again in an attempt against the voices. When neither attempt worked in his favor, heย screwed his eyes shut and whimpered, unconsciously tightening his fingersโ holds on his hair. He curled his legs until his knees met his nose, wrapped his arms around his knees, situated his face in his knees, and bit his lip, letting it all go.ย
Lucas pulled himself down onto his side, curling into a tight fetal position.ย
The scream you heard as your fingertips touched the doorknob could certainly break glass, for they crushed your heart into bittersweet shards of sugar. ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย โฆ . .
+ I hate sleeping alone; Iโm picking up the phoneโฆ
Lucas groaned long & loud, flinging his arms out and falling backward onto the bed, dramatically smashing his heels into the mattress. You being in a separate unit from him was lonely enough, but you going on tour and the manager not letting him accompany you?? Unacceptable.
Lucas sighed, a big puppy pout painting his handsome features, and flopped onto his front, putting his chin in his hands and absently kicking his feet in the air. He got so lost in his brooding feelings of excitement and impatience that he didnโt even notice when the iPhone 13 by his side began to ring. It took him a moment to register that he was receiving a call, but when his brain finally signalled him to reach over and answer it, his heart swelled as he listened to the familiar tone of Taeyong-hyungโs Long Flightย playing from his phone. That meant you were calling!
โฆ
โI never thought itโd get like thisโฆโ you breathed out, a smile spreading like hot lava across your features.
โI knowโฆ I still think about the very first kiss.โย Lucas replied, disregarding the feeling of his face turning red.
โI feel likeย Iโm going outta my mind for youโฆโย you all but whispered, resting your face in one hand and staring dreamily at Lucas on the other side of the screen.
โLucas, youโre blushing! What the fuck are you thinking about!?โ you cried suddenly, peering into the screen to see your boyfriendโs face better.ย
โWHAT!! I AM NOT!!โ he hollered, stirring a mirthy laugh out of you. Lucas blinked blankly at you for a moment, touched his fingers tenderly to his cheek, and his eyes turned wide as saucers. He fought hard against the smile, but it still broke out, bringing with it the happiest laughter Lucas had experienced in years.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย โฆ . .
+ I shouldnโt let it happen so fast; boy, whyโd you have to beg me like that?
Ah, moving days. The few days where one finally gets the hell out of college and gets to move into an actual house.
All was tranquil, all was peacefulโฆ and then โ
โROAN!!!โ came a booming call from across the dorm you and Lucas shared.
โWHAT???โ you all but shrieked back, โgentlyโ (hastily) dropping your cat down onto the couch and running to the other side of the dorm.ย
โLook what I found,โ your obnoxiously top-naked boyfriend said excitedly, sparking your curiosity. You stared at his abs for maybe a moment too long, then tore your eyes away from his Greek god of a physique, walked over and stood next to him, putting your arms around his middle and peeking over the taller manโs shoulder to see what he was looking at.
โHuh,โ you said shortly, โitโs our old photobook from freshman year.โ
โI canโt believe itโฆโ Lucas mumbled, walking over to his bed and sitting down at its foot.
โI knowโฆ Even after all these infinite eons of time weโve had togetherโฆโ you said, your voice trailing into nothing as you sat down next to him, watching him slowly carding through the old photobook.
โRemember when we were seventeen?โ Lucas asked, wrapping his arm around you and pulling you protectively into his side.ย
โYeahโฆ all those times we snuck out and ran away togetherโฆโ you replied, flipping a page. โOOOH, THIS!!โ you burst suddenly, poking a photo with your finger.
Lucas chuckled, smoke billowing out of his nose and between his lips as his chest shook. โWe almost didnโt come back alive that time!โ
You hummed, your gaze falling slowly out of focus until your brain failed to register anything in your line of vision. You hummed and scooted closer to Lucas, snuggling sideways into his one-arm embrace.
โYou looked so cool just nowโฆ just like you used to beโฆโ you said absentmindedly.
โI lookโฆ cool? Whatever do you mean, darling?โย
You giggled, hiding your face in your hands so that your boyfriend might not notice that your blood was painting cherry blossoms on your cheeks.
โIโฆ just meant thatโฆ that you looked cool when you blew that smoke out while you were laughing just nowโฆโ you mumbled into your hands.
Lucas got off the bed and knelt in front of you, placing two warm, firm hands atop yours, and gently removed your hands from your face. What he saw when your defences were no longer in his path made him smile like a maniac.
Lucas applied his warm, gentle, calming touch to your cheeks, cupping your face in his big hands. You smiled and draped your arms on his shoulders, tugging him closer.ย
The two of you simply stared into one anotherโs eyes for the longest time, and then a sudden, overwhelming urge rushed over you, sending shivers down your spine and a manic grin rampaging across your face.You patted the bed next to you, where Lucas had previously been sitting.
Lucas stood up, (towering over your five-four form) giving you a playfully suspicious look, then sat down where youโd indicated, squinting dramatically at you.ย
You giggled, crawling on top of him and straddling his (thicc) thighs, and ran a finger from the middle of his throat slowly down the center of his godly body, fighting away filthy thoughts and not noticing what he was doing. Your sin-loured mind failed to register the feeling of the other manโs large, rough hands slipping like snakes into your shirt and sliding up your body.ย
When your mind let you slip back into reality, the first thing you noticed was your mysterious lack of shirt.ย
You looked to Lucas for answers, only to find a dangerous expression looking back. Not a bad kind of dangerous, mind you. No, this was good. Great. This was lust. Lucas wanted more out of you. You simply smiled right back at him, feeling his hands go to your neck and the small of your back.
Lucas let a low, vicious sound rip from the back of his throat, something between a hum and a growl. His hand tightened on your neck, his face was getting closerโฆ You were touching noses nowโฆ
Before you knew it, your lips were on his. Your eyes fluttered closed, and you tilted your head the slightest bit to the side. You ran your hands up Lucasโs body, leaning further into the kiss. Lucas smiled and hummed into your lips, pressing his hand gently but firmly into your lower back, and pulled you closer so that yours and his bare chests were pressed together.
You slid your hands further up Lucasโs toned, muscled chest, and over his shoulders. You snaked one hand around his shoulder blades, using your arm to pull him impossibly further into you, and tangled the other into his silky brown locks. Lucas took haste to do the same to you, soon leaving a trail of kisses down your face, following your jawline. He now paved a trail with his mouth down your neck, leaving tiny bites and nibbles here and there. He soon decided he wanted to mark you his, and sucked a bright red mark behind your ear, chuckling low into your ear when you whimpered quietly, dropping your head forward onto his shoulder.ย
Lucas peppered feather-light kissed back up your neck, left a little nibble on your earlobe, and whispered something into your ear that sent shivers down your spine.
โJe t'aime mon cher, mon dragon gardien, ma prรฉcieuse bรชte royale.โย
NCT Content Taglist @thishastwentylettersโโโ @ramenlixxieโโ @galaxybambamโโ @babyboobeanโโ @imdamnconfusedโโ @hyukakesโโ @cherubsandswansโโ @verifiedsunghoonsimpโโ @cherryeooโโ @atiny-chocolate-chipโโ @late-minhoursโโ @kun-flowerโย โโ
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All taglists above are currently OPEN! If youโd like to be added to one, please feel free to send me a message here, as well as if you have any questions or comments about this story, any of my other stories, or anything else!
Networks @the-k-neverlandโ @timenote-libraryโ @superm-netโ @akademia-netโ @//bbh-net @//p1har-money @//taeyong-nw
ยฉ 2021โ2022 chai saetang.
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THE BEGINNING HAD ME BY MY HEARTSTRINGS
middle of the night
MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT [Monsta X] G fluff, angst, romance, suggestive,ย lyrical Pย Lucas Wong x male!reader WARNINGS: post-breakup depression, light cursing, self-inflicted wounds, negative thoughts, mentions of blood, implications that Lucas is filthy rich (he is IRL <3 my king), use of tobacco products, pet names (in French!), hickeys A/Nย I changed my song and forgot to fix it on the event page, so yeahโฆ WCย 1,686
+ I thought Iโd never ever need you; now all I wanna do is see youโฆ
Lucas heaved a heavy sigh, carelessly carding his fingers through his hair & pulling at handfuls of the black locks.ย
Why me? What did I do to deserve this? he thought, a sad scowl spreading across his face.
He supposed it was partly his fault; after all, heโd been the one that broke up with you. Heโd gotten so caught up in the weย of the relationship, that he stopped thinking about himself, which led to someโฆ
Self.. destructiveโฆ decisions.
What makes you think you had the right to call yourself his anyways? the snide voice intruded again, youโve always been this way, it wasnโt just the relationship.ย
โNo.. shut upโฆโ he pleaded to himself, in a broken, shaky voice barely more than a whisper.ย โShut up, youโre โ youโre wrongโฆโ
Butโฆ if the voices are wrongโฆ then why did I leave him? Was Iโฆ wrong?
โฆHeโll never take you back, Xuxi,ย the voice sniped, not after what you did to him. You canโt just treat him like heโs the king of your heart and then cast him aside like a dirty dish.
โNoโฆ NO!!โ Lucasโs fingertips slipped steadily and roughly down the wall, the fingers in his other hand curling into a fist, and before he knew it, his knuckles were bleeding.ย
โItโs not trueโฆ I didnโtโฆ Iโฆโ
You never wanted to hurt him?
โOf c-course I d-didnโt! I l-loved hi-himโฆโ he whimpered, pulling at his hair until it burned.
โIโฆ I love himโฆโ he breathed, tears flowing freely down his face. He slowly untangled his visibly trembling hands from his once-silky, slicked black hair, looking blankly at his fingers. For the longest time he simply stared; it was a coonโs age before he noticed theย
Lucas too slid down the wall, deliberately slamming the back of his head into the wall in an effort to make the pain go away, then did it again in an attempt against the voices. When neither attempt worked in his favor, heย screwed his eyes shut and whimpered, unconsciously tightening his fingersโ holds on his hair. He curled his legs until his knees met his nose, wrapped his arms around his knees, situated his face in his knees, and bit his lip, letting it all go.ย
Lucas pulled himself down onto his side, curling into a tight fetal position.ย
The scream you heard as your fingertips touched the doorknob could certainly break glass, for they crushed your heart into bittersweet shards of sugar. ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย โฆ . .
+ I hate sleeping alone; Iโm picking up the phoneโฆ
Lucas groaned long & loud, flinging his arms out and falling backward onto the bed, dramatically smashing his heels into the mattress. You being in a separate unit from him was lonely enough, but you going on tour and the manager not letting him accompany you?? Unacceptable.
Lucas sighed, a big puppy pout painting his handsome features, and flopped onto his front, putting his chin in his hands and absently kicking his feet in the air. He got so lost in his brooding feelings of excitement and impatience that he didnโt even notice when the iPhone 13 by his side began to ring. It took him a moment to register that he was receiving a call, but when his brain finally signalled him to reach over and answer it, his heart swelled as he listened to the familiar tone of Taeyong-hyungโs Long Flightย playing from his phone. That meant you were calling!
โฆ
โI never thought itโd get like thisโฆโ you breathed out, a smile spreading like hot lava across your features.
โI knowโฆ I still think about the very first kiss.โย Lucas replied, disregarding the feeling of his face turning red.
โI feel likeย Iโm going outta my mind for youโฆโย you all but whispered, resting your face in one hand and staring dreamily at Lucas on the other side of the screen.
โLucas, youโre blushing! What the fuck are you thinking about!?โ you cried suddenly, peering into the screen to see your boyfriendโs face better.ย
โWHAT!! I AM NOT!!โ he hollered, stirring a mirthy laugh out of you. Lucas blinked blankly at you for a moment, touched his fingers tenderly to his cheek, and his eyes turned wide as saucers. He fought hard against the smile, but it still broke out, bringing with it the happiest laughter Lucas had experienced in years.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย โฆ . .
+ I shouldnโt let it happen so fast; boy, whyโd you have to beg me like that?
Ah, moving days. The few days where one finally gets the hell out of college and gets to move into an actual house.
All was tranquil, all was peacefulโฆ and then โ
โROAN!!!โ came a booming call from across the dorm you and Lucas shared.
โWHAT???โ you all but shrieked back, โgentlyโ (hastily) dropping your cat down onto the couch and running to the other side of the dorm.ย
โLook what I found,โ your obnoxiously top-naked boyfriend said excitedly, sparking your curiosity. You stared at his abs for maybe a moment too long, then tore your eyes away from his Greek god of a physique, walked over and stood next to him, putting your arms around his middle and peeking over the taller manโs shoulder to see what he was looking at.
โHuh,โ you said shortly, โitโs our old photobook from freshman year.โ
โI canโt believe itโฆโ Lucas mumbled, walking over to his bed and sitting down at its foot.
โI knowโฆ Even after all these infinite eons of time weโve had togetherโฆโ you said, your voice trailing into nothing as you sat down next to him, watching him slowly carding through the old photobook.
โRemember when we were seventeen?โ Lucas asked, wrapping his arm around you and pulling you protectively into his side.ย
โYeahโฆ all those times we snuck out and ran away togetherโฆโ you replied, flipping a page. โOOOH, THIS!!โ you burst suddenly, poking a photo with your finger.
Lucas chuckled, smoke billowing out of his nose and between his lips as his chest shook. โWe almost didnโt come back alive that time!โ
You hummed, your gaze falling slowly out of focus until your brain failed to register anything in your line of vision. You hummed and scooted closer to Lucas, snuggling sideways into his one-arm embrace.
โYou looked so cool just nowโฆ just like you used to beโฆโ you said absentmindedly.
โI lookโฆ cool? Whatever do you mean, darling?โย
You giggled, hiding your face in your hands so that your boyfriend might not notice that your blood was painting cherry blossoms on your cheeks.
โIโฆ just meant thatโฆ that you looked cool when you blew that smoke out while you were laughing just nowโฆโ you mumbled into your hands.
Lucas got off the bed and knelt in front of you, placing two warm, firm hands atop yours, and gently removed your hands from your face. What he saw when your defences were no longer in his path made him smile like a maniac.
Lucas applied his warm, gentle, calming touch to your cheeks, cupping your face in his big hands. You smiled and draped your arms on his shoulders, tugging him closer.ย
The two of you simply stared into one anotherโs eyes for the longest time, and then a sudden, overwhelming urge rushed over you, sending shivers down your spine and a manic grin rampaging across your face.You patted the bed next to you, where Lucas had previously been sitting.
Lucas stood up, (towering over your five-four form) giving you a playfully suspicious look, then sat down where youโd indicated, squinting dramatically at you.ย
You giggled, crawling on top of him and straddling his (thicc) thighs, and ran a finger from the middle of his throat slowly down the center of his godly body, fighting away filthy thoughts and not noticing what he was doing. Your sin-loured mind failed to register the feeling of the other manโs large, rough hands slipping like snakes into your shirt and sliding up your body.ย
When your mind let you slip back into reality, the first thing you noticed was your mysterious lack of shirt.ย
You looked to Lucas for answers, only to find a dangerous expression looking back. Not a bad kind of dangerous, mind you. No, this was good. Great. This was lust. Lucas wanted more out of you. You simply smiled right back at him, feeling his hands go to your neck and the small of your back.
Lucas let a low, vicious sound rip from the back of his throat, something between a hum and a growl. His hand tightened on your neck, his face was getting closerโฆ You were touching noses nowโฆ
Before you knew it, your lips were on his. Your eyes fluttered closed, and you tilted your head the slightest bit to the side. You ran your hands up Lucasโs body, leaning further into the kiss. Lucas smiled and hummed into your lips, pressing his hand gently but firmly into your lower back, and pulled you closer so that yours and his bare chests were pressed together.
You slid your hands further up Lucasโs toned, muscled chest, and over his shoulders. You snaked one hand around his shoulder blades, using your arm to pull him impossibly further into you, and tangled the other into his silky brown locks. Lucas took haste to do the same to you, soon leaving a trail of kisses down your face, following your jawline. He now paved a trail with his mouth down your neck, leaving tiny bites and nibbles here and there. He soon decided he wanted to mark you his, and sucked a bright red mark behind your ear, chuckling low into your ear when you whimpered quietly, dropping your head forward onto his shoulder.ย
Lucas peppered feather-light kissed back up your neck, left a little nibble on your earlobe, and whispered something into your ear that sent shivers down your spine.
โJe t'aime mon cher, mon dragon gardien, ma prรฉcieuse bรชte royale.โย
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