ramxe - Tumblr blog

[ramxe]

I hate it when you’re reading smut and you can’t figure out what position they’re in.

[ramxe]

me

[ramxe]

I received a call for a job interview. I couldn’t exactly remember what position I applied for because I had sent out so many résumés. The interview was short and I got the job. Me, a five foot three woman with tiny arms, was now a bodyguard for the Jonas Brothers.

[ramxe]

Terrible maps

[ramxe]

[ramxe]

I don’t think I’m enlightened enough to doerstarbt this shirt.

[ramxe]

It took me until the last one to realize she is mute and it became 300x more adorable

I’m so glad you’re safe. Extremely safe! Safe and alone!

[ramxe]

THIS IS HILARIOUS I LOVE IT

https://twitter.com/FUTOCHIMPO/status/913645732778852352

[ramxe]

Gonna b honest. A lot of hot ppl go to art museums. I’m one of them

[ramxe]

My tumblr feed right now.

[ramxe]

when your otp has an honest talk only in dire situations, like when they’re running full tilt being carried by the wind shouting at the top of their lungs

(the movie made this flying thing so romantic, but the book version is basically ‘howl and sophie scream into the wind as it slams them back to the castle’)

[ramxe]

Is that Arin Hanson?

u: *saves the game* ur brain:

[ramxe]

australian gothic

- we all refer to the prime minister by their first name. we know them well, and they know us. all of us.

- there’s a man on the street corner who never leaves. “just waiting for a mate,” he says. you realise he is on every corner, of every street.

- you are swooped by a magpie in the same place, at the same time, every single day. “it’s swooping season!” says your neighbour. it has always been swooping season.

- sometimes you hear a woman whispering late at night - or early in the morning. “rage” she hisses. “rage”.

- the prime minister never seems to last long and often disappears through no discernible democratic process. one of them eats a raw onion in an attempt to assimilate. he is gone by morning, replaced by another.

[ramxe]

A girl I liked convinced me to stab a man, so I did. Felt guilty for a bit, then promptly forgot about it and walked around with the murder weapon for a couple of hours, going about my business, walking my dog. Eventually I was cornered by a plainclothes police officer who asked me why I had a bloody knife; I told him I was looking after it for my bogan cousin. He said, “You’re under arrest,” and I was like,, “No, I’m not, watch this,” and then I woke up.

[ramxe]

Reblog this or die.

[ramxe]

Really polite zombies

Zombie Apocalypse

[ramxe]

My heart goes out to the 27 victims of the recent ligma outbreak. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.