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[random-story-writer-blog]

Hello Magic

Word Count: 1242

Pairings: none

Warnings: cursing, angst, mentions of death

A/N: Not gonna like this was tricky as hell, but I can't say I didn't enjoy writing it!

Summary: This certainly wasn't the right place, hell this wasn't even the right universe. Klaus's luck just seems to be getting worse and worse. Or does it? Seems the best teacher for talking with the dead would be a demonologist and master of the dark arts.

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John had been drowning his stress in whiskey, much like he tended to do. Chas had left quite a while ago, leaving John to his own devices. That was never a good thing, especially when John decided drunk magic was a good idea. Admittedly though he did a pretty good job of finding the ingredients lying around. The spell was going rather well at the time too.

Until it exploded.

~

Klaus had been laying on the couch, staring at the ceiling. He mindlessly flicked ash from his cigarette onto the floor. Klaus was vaguely aware of Diego arguing with Allison and Five in another room. He was starting to come down from his high, the voices whispering just barely audible. He stared at the ceiling a moment longer. Or he would have if his surroundings hadn't started shifting. He sat up frowning slightly as he watched parts of the house start to fade away.

"Woah... bad trip..."

Then everything went black.

~

John cursed loudly as he pulled himself into a sitting position. He blinked a few times waiting for his eyes to readjust to the light in the room after that small explosion. He stood up, groaning slightly at his sore muscles. When he saw the man laying on the floor across the room he paused.

"Bollocks."

Klaus laid on the ground, his mind reeling as he tried to process just what happened. This definitely wasn't home, and he was almost certain this was not a crazy drug induced dream.

Almost.

"Hey, you alive mate?"

Klaus turned his head to find a pair of shoes beside his head. He slowly looked up, at the blonde man staring down at him.

"I'm don't think I'm in Kansas anymore." Klaus said sarcastically.

The man raised an eyebrow and helped him to his feet.

"That where you're from then? Kansas?"

Klaus looked at the closely. Something was so familiar about him, he just couldn't remember why.

"No, it's just joke, you know Wizard of Oz, sort of thing."

The man gave him a bored expression and nodded.

"Right, then where the bloody hell are you from?" John muttered.

He wanted to get him out of here and resume drowning his problems in cheap booze, and poorly used magic. Klaus stared at him intently, John looked up at him, raising an eyebrow.

"Why do you look so familiar? Have I stolen something from you? Did we get into a bar fight?"

"Trust me mate, we haven't met, you'd likely be dead if we had." John scoffed.

Klaus tapped his chin, as if he was deep in thought. He suddenly perked up, pointing to John.

"I know! You remind me of this character from my favorite comic book! John Constantine! I gotta say you really look like him. Do you do this for a living?"

That seemed to be a poor choice of words as John looked at him with a cold expression.

"I am John Constantine. Now who the hell are you?"

Klaus's smile disappeared, and he raised his eyebrows.

"No you're not. He's just some guy from a comic I used to read. He's not real." Klaus scoffed.

John grabbed him by the shirt, narrowing his eyes. Klaus let out a shout and raised his hands.

"I am John fucking Constantine. Now the bloody hell, are you? Bet you're another feathered arse ain't you? Trying to get me play the good solider? Tell your boss he knows exactly where he can shove it, I ain't playing a part in his game mate." John hissed.

"Klaus! My name is Klaus! I promise you I'm not a.. feathered arse? I swear! I don't even know what that means!"

John watched him closely for a moment, searching for any signs he was lying.

"You smell like a brewery, do you bathe in whiskey?" Klaus asked nervously.

He let him go and took a step back. Klaus fixed his shirt and watched John closely, trying to decide if he was going to flip out on him again.

"You're actually John Constantine?"

" 's what it says on my birth certificate." John muttered.

Klaus blinked slowly and pinched himself.

"Not dreaming..."

John watched him curiously as Klaus looked around.

"This must be a horrible trip then."

Klaus reached for the bottle sitting on the table and took a long drink from it.

"Oi!" John protested.

"It's like, there's two of John now." A new voice sighed.

Klaus tensed looking around. The drugs were slowly working their way out of his system and the voices from the dearly departed were only getting louder. Constantine must have noticed Klaus's frigid posture.

"You alright there mate? You look like ya seen a ghost."

"Hear them is more accurate." Klaus laughed dryly.

"You a medium?" John as casually as if he encountered stuff like this regularly.

Klaus remembered this man did encounter this stuff regularly. That this was normal for him. Klaus's hope raised and he turned to John.

"Kinda. Anyway can you fix me?"

"Fix you?"

"Stop me hearing the voices. You know like a supernatural lobotomy sort of thing." Klaus said.

John snatched his bottle back from Klaus and took a swig of it as he walked towards the living room.

"It ain't a disease mate. There's no cure for talking with the dead."

Klaus deflated a little and followed after John. He was moving about the living room, grabbing strange items from different shelves.

"Then by any chance would you have anything... recreational around here I could use?"

"God you really are just like John." The voice laughed again much louder than before.

Klaus flinched and John regarded him with an unreadable expression.

"Sorry mate, I don't have anything on me today. That how you silence the voices then? Get high?"

John didn't sound like he was judging him or even criticizing him.

"It silences them for a bit." Klaus shrugged.

John nodded slowly, and sat everything he was holding down on the table.

"Who you hear right now?"

Klaus paused for a moment and waited a moment.

"He said his name is Gary, and that you're a wanker."

John chuckled sadly and motioned to the mirror above the fireplace. There were two people in the mirror. One was John but the other was a man Klaus didn't know. In fact nothing in the mirror was happening now.

"That's my mate Gary. The mirror shows you the past. I got him killed, wasn't that long ago." John explained.

John seemed to be having an internal argument with himself.

"Alright, listen here mate. I'll get ya back to your own universe, and you can get back to shooting yourself up just like old times, or I could teach you how to control that handy little gift of yours."

Klaus regarded him skeptically.

"And what do you get out of it? I'm not stupid I read your comics. You're called a Con Man."

John laughed and shrugged.

"Aye, that I am, all you have to do is talk to someone for me, that's all. What'd say? Do we got a deal?"

John held his hand out for Klaus to shake. Klaus crossed his arms, as if he was actually going to say no.

"I'll get ya all the cheap booze you can drink. I've plenty of people to go to if you need something with a little more kick." John smirked.

Klaus grinned back, shaking his hand.

"You had me at cheap booze Constantine."

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@thelonejester