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[rarelypureneversimple]

“Oh you know…” A hand was waved absently and inconclusively between them. “I have a steady flow of clients that keeps me in expensive liquor and good food.” He answered, unwilling to delve further into his job. Crowley had learned long ago that the best way to keep good paying clients and also to keep himself out of hot water was to not talk about any dealings he had. The only one he even remotely opened up to was Aziraphale in that respect. “And I should hope not considering you expect me to fish you out of the water when you are floundering in the deep end. You never did learn to stay in the kiddies pool.” Picking up a piece of pepperoni between his thumb and forefinger, he popped it into his mouth with a slight smile.

“I would argue that it’s been a very long time since I’ve floundered,” Ernest said, although he had a small smile on his face. He remembered many, many times when Crowley had grabbed him by the back of his neck like a kitten and dragged him away from trouble. There were many things he owed to the other man - and many things sat in the air around them, the building blocks of their shared history. “Most days it’s much younger versions of myself who’s messes I have to clean up. And who knows - maybe one day they’ll have my job and I’ll be dead, just like the old man. This shit is cyclical, I’m tellin ya.” He paused, pizza halfway into his mouth. 

“Motel ownership, that is. I figure it’ll be good to pass it along the same way I got it.”

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Octavia had been about to leave, moving on to her other work but his expression and then his words stopped her, “What?” She asked, “What are you talking about?” She said it casually but she needed the money. Ever since she had lost her spot in police training, she had been desperate for a proper job. Maybe he could offer something.

“I work for a bit of a... rogue actor, I guess you could call her. She’s looking for someone to do work similar to that of a bouncer. Plus some other odd jobs. You’d still keep your job here, of course, that would be necessary. But working with us you’d make... 10k a month.” He said it casually, as though he were saying a much smaller number, like 15 dollars an hour. 

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“Then sounds like you’re pretty lucky then… Or maybe he is since you seem to get yourself into trouble more than most.” Rick explained with a bit of a shrug of his shoulders, moving to sit opposite the other man.  “Nothing is going on with me. It was too quiet in here so I wanted to check you were still kickin’.” Came the answer as he shrugged. “I’ve already had most of my meetings done for the day so I a was thinking of visiting my favorite establishment in Maple; the bar.”

Ernest perked up slightly at the mention of the bar, sitting up straighter and folding his hands together gleefully. He held it all in though, not wanting to get too excited at the idea of going out drinking with his friend. There was every chance that it would fall apart and then he would have wasted time being happy for nothing. "Okay - where are we going?" He asked, pursing his lips slightly. He always had business to attend to at the Arcane Inferno, but there was every chance that Magnus would actually see him and try to talk to him. Which was the opposite of what he wanted. "Because depending on where you're going I might be interested in joining you."

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Bj looked at the other suspiciously, like this was too good to be true. “You wanna hire me? A homeless guy who doesn’t even have a college degree?” Bj didn’t know why he was even saying all this. Why was he talking himself out of a job? He took the card and examined it, not knowing what to make of all this. “I mean, I’ll take it. Just what would you have me be doing? Because I don’t do well working by myself.” He said, hoping this was all real and not just some prank.

Ernest shook his head, a small smile growing on his face at the other man’s enthusiasm. This was perfect, Beetlejuice would be perfect, and he was proud of himself for having found him.  “Don’t worry. We’ll be working together closely. Some odd jobs around the motel - some odd jobs around town. But what you need to understand about my line of work is that discretion is key.” Ernest’s tone turned rather solid and serious, although his friendly smile did not change. “I run a by-the-hour motel. I’m sure you can understand why my guests would prefer their privacy not be invaded by anyone being nosy.”

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Kit smiled and placed a big kiss on his cheek. “I knew you couldn’t turn down your favorite Snicket.” She smirked and promptly took the keys before he could change his mind. “Want to have coffee tomorrow morning? I don’t start my shift until 9.” She asked as she handed him her credit card.

Ernest nodded, taking down the card information with a pen and handing it back to her. “Sure. You know where I’ll be. Although actually if I’m not here - someone else will be manning the desk I’m sure.” He said with a smile. “They’ll certainly be willing to have coffee with you, I’m sure.” 

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“I prefer the term woman.” Catherine corrected, being called a girl made her sound so juvenile and she was far from that. She was about to thank him for his compliments, her mouth parted as she was about to speak before she stopped. Simply gaping at him, “What do you mean ‘It’s a shame what happened’?” She questioned him. “Is it really good business to tell people that you’re known for overcharging?” She asked, “But I promise I’ll keep my lips sealed, as long as you don’t go blabbing around town that I got a room here.”

“Oh, it’s nothing. I just heard some negative reviews from some people about your last set. Not me, of course, just some other people. I might be one of your biggest fans.” He said flatly, pulling out a form and sliding it across the desk to her. “If you don't mind me asking - what does bring you to our little bed and breakfast?” He inquired. 

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If there was a thread loose on Magnus’ shirt in the first place, that was enough of a reason to throw it out so he was already planning that in his head. It wasn’t like he didn’t have more and besides, it meant he could go shopping. 

“I think you need to go to bed.” Magnus answered simply, attempting to evade the question somewhat. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know where their conversation would go next if he did. “Come on. The sheets are fresh. I’ll throw your clothes in the washer and stay with you until you fall asleep if you like.” He didn’t think it would take all that long from the way the others eyelids were drooping. “You know the way to my bedroom by now.”

It wasn’t the answer he wanted, and he made it very clear in the expression on his face that he was unhappy. But he was exhasuted, and he could hardly keep his eyes open. He was resigned to his fate, it seemed, and he stood slowly. He swayed on his feet, catching himself. He kicked his shoes off as he walked, tearing his shirt over his head and just dropping it onto the floor. He did the same with his pants, not necessarily caring where they landed, opening the bedroom door and falling into the bed. By the time he arrived he was clad in only his boxers, not even bothering to cover himself in a blanket. 

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Hades took in the younger man’s mix of nerves and defeat with a sort of near-giddy amusement. “Young man,” he responded, raising the back of his hand to his mouth to disguise a deep chuckle in the clearing of his throat, “I do believe that’s the first intelligent thing you’ve said this afternoon.”

Every soul he worked with back at the office had stayed employed because they ain’t made themselves trouble ; every client he maintained with a careful distance and courtesy. Rare was the opportunity Hades had to go toe-to-toe, get the thrill from stretching out the presence he’d dutifully cultivated over the years. If ya got more than straw between your ears, ain’t hard at all to manage the darker underbelly of the world and come out with blood singing and inspiration turnin’ the mind. Not that Ernest Denouement was much to manage ; Hades had worked land deals in the private rooms of his hotel for years, and it’d be kind to say the young man had a hay stack in his head. But at least, usually, he had a talent for bein’ discrete. 

Though a run-of-the-mill land inspection hardly required it. He quirked his eyebrow the longer the younger man pontificated and, not gathering, glanced behind him for the crushed pile of greenery he’d been so eager to disguise. Hades sniffed again and, this time, frowned. Second time around the scent was unfortunately familiar ; he’d found the same sickly sweet, heady odor clingin’ to his wife’s laundry more times than he liked to think about. He looked back to Ernest with a furrowed brow, gesturing vaguely to the pile. “It ain’t mine,” he rumbled, considering it again with a deeper frown. Wouldn’t look good if some dumb kid came stompin’ through here once he’d gotten this place sold and found a patch of the stuff.

Mulling his jaw and still considering the pile, he pointed again with his hat out to the man. “I tell you what, Mr. Denouement,” he offered, slow to drawl while his mind turned. A sniffer weasel for certain, but a discrete one, and clever enough to avoid any toothy jaws ‘til now. “You forget the IOU and you make it a 'quick favor,’ I won’t call any other hands into this. Do some diggin’ for me, find out how this wound up here in the first place - you’ll excuse the turn of expression, but it does look like ya’ve got a talent for it. You dig fast enough and I’ll ensure some nice compensation as well.”

Ernest looked a little surprised at that, but then his look of shock turned into more of a feral grin. This would be dealt with much, much easier than he thought it would be. He twisted his hands together anxiously, pressing his pointer fingers together and using them to gesture as he spoke.  “You’ve found the perfect man for the job, Hades - uh. Mr. Hades. I’ll get rid of the beasts as quick as I can, just like I intended to do in the first place. It won’t do to have weeds in the garden, I’m sure.” He paused for a moment at his own joke. He was obviously making an effort to stand still, and thus his mouth was off like a light. He was still very much the middle child with undiagnosed ADHD at heart - no matter how old or estranged from his family he got.  “I’m assuming you want to actually know about who’s doing this, then. Or do you just want me to pass it, uh. Up the ladder?” He asked, pursing his lips a little bit as he awaited an answer, rocking up onto his toes for a moment. 

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“Apparently.” Crowley answered simply as he watched, the food not looking entirely appealing but he also didn’t have any intention for hurting the others feeling. For some reason he’d yet to figure out, the man had formed an attachment to him back when he was barely an adult himself. Since then, he’d popped up all the time. Granted, the guy wasn’t very good at keeping out of trouble but… he’d had less reason to fix his messes the older Ernest had gotten. “If you aren’t going to do things properly, why do things at all.” Crowley argued when the man mentioned how often he had four course meals. “Eat. I can’t possibly ingest all that. I’ll take a slice.”

Ernest grinned when Crowley offered up the rest of the pizza, greedily pulling it back towards himself, taking another bite from the piece on his plate. In reality, he always found himself running around too much during the day to actually eat a real meal. He’d gotten into the habit of sticking a little bag of carrots around in his shirt pocket just to keep himself going. He’d never been able to sit down through those long dinners or events - showing up at a chuck e. cheese and shooting skee-ball was always more his speed.  “How’s business for you anyways?” He asked inquisitively, squinting his eyes at him. “Heard about your case last week - a bit of a doozy. But I’ve never doubted your skills.” He said, face growing into a sly smile. 

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This wasn’t usually the type of place one would find Crowley. The only time he tended to eat food like this was when he was drunk. Still, the younger male in front of him was inhaling it like he’d never get fed again. “I’m still trying to figure out why I am here with you. I don’t think you needed two people to eat this pizza.”

Ernest looked up, pausing with the pizza halfway into his mouth, his eyes almost comically wide at being called out. He let the piece drop back onto his plate with a huff, crossing his arms over his chest in mock offense. “Well forgive me for offering to buy you a meal. Not all of us have the time to sit down for a four-course meal every day. I’m still practically a growing boy.” He inspected the already half-gone pizza between them, pushing the rest of the pan closer to Crowley in invitation. “Everyone deserves something greasy every now and then.”

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“Have you ever been punched in the face because a man was unable to accomplish what you were showing them and you were smug about it- because I could totally see that happen. It’s 2020 and fragile masculinity is still a very common thing I’ve noticed.” Leo blinked several times at the other, “You do realize that either sounded like a terrible pick up line or like something I would hear before I ended up on the news because my body had been found in some ditch, right?” 

Ernest shrugged, taking another sip of his drink before responding. “I’m just making conversation - I think you might be reading into it what you want to hear,” He said, entirely too comfortable with being on the receiving end of either of the two assumptions, and doing nothing to contradict either one. “Maybe you do have a thing for being tied up by potential murderers. Who am I to judge?”

“To answer your question - yes, I have. The really, really good thing is that I’m equally as capable at throwing punches as any other guy. Fragile masculinity and all that.” He said, grinning like a feral cat. 

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Ernest Denouement || Peter Pevensie

emoji starters 001

🌊 - our muses spend a day at the lake/beach together

🍻 - our muses grab a drink together

🍕  - our muses grab a slice at the diner together

⚽️ - our muses play sports together

🤕 - on of our muses get’s injured

🎶 - our muses go to a dance club / karaoke bar together

🔒 - our muses get stuck in an elevator together

🎮 - our muses spend the day at level up

🧗‍♂️ - our muses spend the day at the oasis recreational center

🗺️ - our muses get lost on a hike together

🏕️ - our muses go camping together   

🧁- our muses bake/make food together

☀️ - our muses take advantage of the sunny weather

📱 - one of our muses sends an accidental text to the other

ooc info

we thought these would be nice to set the summer mood here in maple falls. these are not obligatory, but we thought they’d be fun for those who wanted us to make them a while back!

for this task the closed starter rule will no longer be ineffective. was also ask that if you reblog/repost this to your blog and you have multiple characters, please only reblog/repost it to one and tag the others in the post to avoid clogging the dash!!

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“I know I work the job for the money but being a bouncer is more interesting to me and I’m more qualified for it than bartending. I have half a year of police training and years of mixed-martial arts experience. I had no experience mixing or pouring drinks before this job.”

Ernest considered her for a moment before leaning forward, opening his mouth to speak before closing it again, giving a dismissive shake of his head and having another drink of the beer in front of him. “No, no. You probably wouldn’t be interested.” He said, flicking his eyes back over to her before looking down at his hands again. “Although you’d probably make a lot more money from it than bartending,” He said, as though he himself hadn’t decided yet if he was going to reveal what he had almost offered her.

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“Ernest…” The others name was spoken softly but with a tinge of warning behind it at the kiss. Still, a second later and it seemed almost as if the male had settled in for the night. It wasn’t exactly the way Magnus had envisaged attempting to sleep tonight but then none of this had really been how he had expected the evening to unfold. 

“Of course it matters.” Magnus accepted and validated the others feelings, lifting a hand to ruffle the others hair lightly, because if not, Ernest would not have been here with Magnus right now. “In my eyes there was and is nothing wrong with you Ernest. Everyone is different though and everyone has an A– their own person who is just for them and them alone. You’ll find yours eventually.” He’d caught himself before he managed to let the name slip. If anything, meeting Alexander had proven to him that there was someone for everyone. Not just anyone could have convinced Magnus to give up on his playboy ways. “And this isn’t me getting away from you. We will still be close just in a different way.”

Ernest only hummed in disbelief, tugging harshly at the loose thread almost as though he expected to upset the other by pulling apart his shirt, before dropping it and wrapping his arm around Magnus’s middle, letting his hand settle by his hip. He took a deep breath before opening his eyes and lifting his head with great effort to meet Magnus’ eyes. 

“Do you want to go to bed?” He whispered, reaching a hand up to cup Magnus’ face gently, smoothing his thumb over the other man’s cheekbone curiously. He ducked his head again, hiding his face before the other could answer.

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Kit narrowed her eyes at the other. “Have I ever told you that my biological brothers are less of a pain in my ass than you?” She was joking…mostly. “Ernest I would never do anything that would put you in danger, you know that. Look, I’m trying to give you my business. Are you going to take it or not?”At first her words were sharp, but then she started pleading at him with sad, dopey eyes.

Ernest sighed, finally grabbing some keys and putting them into a very tiny manilla folder, closing it and handing it to her. “Fine. Room 105, out the doors and the your immediate left. The laundry room is wrecked right now - something wrong with the washer and it’s been leaking a little bit so I have someone coming out to look at it. Should be fixed in a couple days. I need a credit card on file in case you break anything. Coffee gets made every morning at six, donuts are delivered at eight. I’ll come around and clean the rooms around eleven. If you need anything feel free to call the front desk and enjoy your stay.” As soon as he had begun his spiel he was speaking a mile a minute, not slowing down, asking if she needed anything repreated, or taking a breath.  He held the keys out to her with a large, too wide smile, staring at her until she took the keys from him. 

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Magnus did not expect his lap to suddenly be occupied by the other man and he had been ready to carefully extricate himself to avoid the situation from escalating. As much as he didn’t want to hurt Ernest, he wanted to do something that might have been considered cheating on his… well not his boyfriend but Magnus didn’t know how to describe them… but he knew that it would be doing something unacceptable given their current status. 

A soft sigh left Magnus though when Ernest assured him he wouldn’t do anything more and despite being a little taken aback, he appeared to relax, his arms moving to rest around the man. “I’m sure I’m easily replaceable Ernest. There will be someone else that you will find far more captivating than me soon enough and you’ll wonder why you cared so much.” He murmured quietly.

Ernest sighed, pressing a single chaste kiss to his neck before settling, his eyes closed. He was already half asleep, the alcohol doing it’s job rather quickly now that he was settled.  “But I care right now,” Ernest said softly, his hand dropping down to fiddle with the other man’s shirt, grabbing and tugging on a loose thread. “Doesn’t that matter?” He was quiet for a moment, biting at his lower lip before speaking again. “You were my favorite. Even though I’m... me. And I’m broken. It’s for the best that you’re getting away from me.”

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Bj shook his head. “That’s real grand of ya, but I’ve got a stink hole downtown. The money I make doing this and odd jobs is enough to keep me in it.” Nevermind all the drugs he sold, no one needed to know about that. “Running a motel…that sounds like a cool gig though.”

Ernest smiled rather proudly, giving a shrug of his shoulders. “It’s fine, if you like dealing with partying college kids and tinder hookups.” He said casually, crouching down and resting his elbows on his knees in front of him. He lowered his voice slightly, maintaining eye contact as he spoke. “Really, if you think it’s cool, I could let you help me out. I’d have to look at the books, but I think I’ll be able to pay you enough that you could stop with the odd jobs. Might be nice to know where your next paycheck is coming from.”  He fished into his pocket, taking out a business card and offering it to him between two fingers. It was a black card with a silver 'MM’ pressed into the front of it. On the back it was very similar to any old motel business card, boasting about the motel’s free wireless internet and complimentary continental breakfast. Instead of any address, though, there was simply a phone number with a local area code. 

He raised an eyebrow at him challengingly, waiting for him to accept the card.