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Bon giorno it is 10 am for the beutiful fashionistas of italia right now perfect time for a brunch with handsome loved onws

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stop eating coffee cakes with the lesser drakes and come drink from a flagon with an elder dragon

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My body is already an inhospitable environment, there’s no way a friggin baby would be able to survive in it

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I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"

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My mom left an eviction notice for the carpenter bees burrowing into our porch

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his greed sickens me

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i’m sick and tired of people pretending that burger isn’t delicious just to clown on americans. america deserves the ridicule, but why’s burger catching strays? burger did nothing wrong

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bro i,m like two squeaks old

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baby bear loves spaghetti

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Thank you for feeding me you are the true lord to me

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bad news for chocolate lovers: amid massive corporate downsizing, Lindt has had to euthanize 2,000 of its handsome european chocolate chefs . an additional 1,300 will be thrown out in the cold with nothing but their stupid Fucking whisks

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