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This feels like the start to a horror movie and I love it

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What do you mean you can’t find a job? Have you looked on Indeed? What about Linkedin? You should try Upwork. How about Rise? Have you tried Jobera? Take a look on Dribbble. You GOTTA be on Jooble, dude. Get on Jooble. Jooble has it for you.

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EEEKKK *trips and falls and you catch a glimpse of my evil and irredeemable soul*

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Why are you using chatgpt to get through college. Why are you spending so much time and money on something just to be functionally illiterate and have zero new skills at the end of it all. Literally shooting yourself in the foot. If you want to waste thirty grand you can always just buy a sportscar.

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local dumb bitch whose work bestie became real bestie finally understands platonic love

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Going to work my manual labor job with nothing but a Benadryl energy drink and Robitussin in my system feeling more beautiful than I've ever felt before

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honestly i never thought the phrase “i want that twink obliterated” was like a sexual thing. like when i read the phrase i imagine “a meteor like the one that killed the dinosaurs is summoned from the heavens and hits the twink in question” type situation

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when i was at walgreens (at 3 in the morning which explains all of this) the cashier was talking to her coworker about how shed rather be a werewolf than a vampire because vampires are condemned to hell but werewolves arent and then she asked me what i thought and i said vampire because im already condemned to hell and she said in the nicest tone of voice “i dont think anybody is condemned to hell….” paused, stared at me for a few moments, and added on “…not even gay people” 

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gotta love a dog that just doesn't care if the ball of fluff is spicy or not, it will eventually surrender to the warm

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remember when you drew incest?

I'm glad that it was good enough for you to remember

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Having your main anxiety response be Avoidance is crazy cause you'll think you're chillin and then one day you're like waitttt I've been paralyzed with fear this whole time. Damn

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i’m sorry kink fans but i just can’t see the suffix ‘con’ without thinking it means convention

‘dubcon’ will skrillex be there??

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i can’t stand “it’s not that deep” attitudes like even if it really really isn’t that deep just PLAY WITH ME. just fucking PLAY. have a meaningless but deep analytical conversation with me. just like think about shit for fun. does anyone else like to think about stuff for fun. it’s so lonely

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happy pride month to cody–boy kisser–rhodes 🫶🏻🏳️‍🌈‼️