rayesworld

[rayesworld]

Writing characters who don’t know they’re in love

(PS: but literally everyone else does and is so tired)

These characters aren’t clueless, no, they’re not walking around like, “love? never heard of her.” They know something’s going on, they just won’t admit it (not to themselves, not to anyone.) Maybe they’re scared of messing it up, or maybe they think the other person doesn’t feel the same. Maybe they’ve stuffed the feeling so deep even a NASA rover couldn’t dig it out.

Whatever the reason, they’re not avoiding the truth as much as they’re…rebranding it. Calling it “friendship” while giving each other their only jacket and dreaming about each other’s voices like it’s totally normal behavior.

ꕤ They don’t realize it’s love, but they notice everything else. They clock every mood shift, every absence, every little thing. They definitely  know when something’s off.

⇢ “You changed your hair.” ⇢ “You looked upset earlier.” ⇢ “You didn’t text me back and I panicked.” ⇢ “You weren’t at lunch and it felt weird.” ⇢ “Are you cold?” hands over jacket without a second thought

They don’t say “I love you,” but their actions scream it constantly.

ꕤ they get weird when someone else gets close They’re not jealous. No, how dare you think something like that… they’re just keeping an eye out. For safety... Or whatever."

⇢ “Who was that?” ⇢ “Oh, you’re hanging out with them again?” ⇢ “I just think it’s interesting how you never cancel on them.”

They don’t say it, but they hate the idea of being replaced. It stings more than they’re ready to admit.

ꕤ they make excuses to be around each other.

Literally inventing reasons to be in the same space.

⇢ “Wanna study together? I’m struggling with this topic.” (They’re not.) ⇢ “Oh, I was just in the area.” (They weren’t.) ⇢ “You forgot this.” (It’s a single pen.)

They’d rather lie badly than admit, “I just wanted to see you.”

ꕤ  Their friends are so over it Everyone around them is either rooting for them or trying not to scream.

⇢ “You’re in love with them.” ⇢ “That’s not friendship, and you know it.” ⇢ “You made them soup. FUCKING SOUP. Just say you’re married already.” ⇢ “If I have to hear you talk about them one more time, I’m charging rent.”

Friends are the Greek chorus of this situation, like, brutally honest and endlessly tired.

ꕤ  There’s always a moment they almost figure it out That one soft, unspoken beat where the truth almost breaks through.

⇢ Watching them laugh like it’s the first time. ⇢ Seeing them cry and wanting to fix it more than anything. ⇢ Realizing no one else makes them feel like this. ⇢ Thinking, God, they’re beautiful.

Then they blink, panic a little, and go, “Huh. Weird.” And move on. Like absolute fools.

ꕤ  When it finally hits, it’s not cute, it’s catastrophic. Suddenly everything makes sense and feels like too much.

⇢ Flashbacks. ⇢ Internal screaming. ⇢ “Oh no.” ⇢ “OH MY GOD.” ⇢ “Has it always been this obvious??” ⇢ “Wait. Everyone knew?!”

Yes. Everyone. The friends, the neighbor’s cat. You were the only two who didn’t get the memo...

[rayesworld]

thinking about how when you experience a lot of shame in your formative years (indirectly, directly, as abuse or just as an extant part of your environment) it becomes really difficult to be perceived by other people in general. the mere concept of someone watching me do anything, whether it's a totally normal activity or something unfamiliar of embarrassing, whether I'm working in an excel spreadsheet or being horny on main, it just makes my skin crawl and my brain turn to static because I cannot convince myself that it's okay to be seen and experienced. because to exist is to be ashamed and embarrassed of myself, whether I'm failing at something or not, because my instinctive reaction to anyone commenting on ANYTHING I'm doing is to crawl into a hole and die. it's such a bizarre and dehumanizing feeling to just not be able to exist without constantly thinking about how you are being Perceived. ceaseless watcher give me a god damn break.

[rayesworld]

[rayesworld]

[rayesworld]

[rayesworld]

Speaking of vampires - here's the drawing of some nosferatu guys I did back in 2020. It's a redraw of an even older sketch.

[rayesworld]

Forbidden Love Dialogue Prompts

Trying out some different tropes. If there's a trope you'd like to see some prompts for in the future please let me know.

"Stop—someone might see us."

"You told them. You—I can't believe you told them about us. I trusted you."

"That fucking hurt!" "I'm sorry. I—I panicked when they walked in. I don't want to get caught!"

"Come on, you have to admit, sneaking around like this is kind of... fun."

"Someone saw us last night. They saw us. God, what if they tell?"

"I don't care! I don't care. I can't do this anymore. The lying, the sneaking around. I can't bear the thought of anyone else touching you, of anyone thinking... I want everyone to know you're mine."

"We—We can't." "Why not?" "If anyone ever found out..." "They won't."

"I love you." "You take that back." "No. I'm done hiding. I love you, and I want the entire world to know you're mine."

"Would it really be so bad—getting caught?" "Yes!"

"We have to stop." "What are you talking about?" "We can't keep doing this. We're going to get caught." "I don't care."

"Why won't you admit it?" "Because I'm scared, dammit! I'm terrified of what this means. I'm terrified to want you, to need you, to... love you. Because if anyone ever found out... God, it would destroy us."

"We were doomed from the start. But you know what, I wouldn't change a damn thing."

"Loving you was never the problem. It was pretending I didn't that killed me."

[rayesworld]

My two yr old is looking through a book about prehistoric art and she saw a picture of those cave painting of hands and she held up her own and said "hand!" And I gotta be honest. That hit

[rayesworld]

no actually i don't think antivaxxers' kids should die from a disease. i don't think gun advocates' kids should die in school shooting. children dying is bad actually, even if they're children of people you don't like.

[rayesworld]

JURASSIC BESTIARY (individual cards version)

Dinosaurs and other prehistoric animals of the Jurassic Period stylized as a medieval Bestiary. Some of these are available at Redbubble for prints, t-shirts and more

___

Youtube channel

Instagram

Prints and more paleoart merch

[rayesworld]

Hey just a quick check in- now that musk is like severely imploding on trump and their severed ties

Yall won't forget this part right?

Yall won't forget he's still a massive scumbag right? That he's still a nazi right? That won't get lost in translation right???

(I don't THINK it'll get forgotten but I really want to remind people that just because Musk is now bashing trump for all the shit we've known about him for awhile that we don't forget he was complicit. If anything his bashing and airing out trumps laundry makes it worse, because he KNEW all that and still worked with him.)

[rayesworld]

some fallout fauna sketches, hayburner and razorback 

[rayesworld]

South Island, New Zealand by Ashley Dobson

[rayesworld]

I'll never stop defending the use of funky grammar. deconstruct the english language and scatter its remains. leave grammar errors like a trail of breadcrumbs for people to follow and find a part of your soul.

[rayesworld]

[rayesworld]

[rayesworld]

where’s that 1900s painting of the centaur mother playing with her child in a grassy field?