renesmeehappy

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https://innocenceproject.org/petitions/call-on-gov-abbott-to-stop-robert-robersons-execution/

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Problem #1 regarding child abuse is that a lot of people seem to struggle to imagine normal, respectable-looking parents and other authority figures ever doing it despite the statistics so instead they do the stranger danger panic and completely overlook some of the greatest threats.

Problem #2 is that even when people understand, even if in an abstract way, that parents can be abusive they just... don't seem to actually register that as something that can apply to real life. It's just hypothetical to them and doesn't actually guide their ideas of how to prevent child abuse.

Problem #3 is that even after overcoming the above biases a lot of people have a very narrow image of what abusive parenting is where they imagine like... people doing violent things basically out of sadism and without provocation. They don't seem to think it's "real" abuse if the victim did something that "justifies" punitive violence, like disobeying the parents.

In fact, most people think parents have a right to do a whole lot of awful things to their children beyond just hitting them, like violating their privacy, controlling their access to information, and deciding what/when/if they eat, among other things.

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Here I present you Hoshino Keiko! Daughter of Hoshino Aqua and Kurokawa Akane from Oshi No Ko.

I thought about drawing her, but I couldn't so I used an app to make her.

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No offense to any aquakana fans, but I didn't like the new chapter. In my opinion the way Aqua and Kana described what they like about each other and how their dynamic is written in general is cliché and superficial. Aquakane has a more interesting and balanced dynamic. I really hope Aka will pull a twist and Aqua and Akane will end up together. Unless of course Aqua says he dated Akane because he couldn't date Kana. In that case I don't want aquakane together, my girl deserves better.

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I love how Akane gets to the heart of the issue. To how wrong it is that Aqua blames himself for that corpse when the one at fault is the killer. To how wrong it is that he takes responsibility for anything and everything that goes wrong at any given time.

I love how taken aback Aqua looks. It's so sad that all he can say is you... think? as if the thought of someone else being the one to blame had never crossed his mind until Akane brings it up.

And then Aqua, being Aqua, just goes for the next thing to blame himself about. Because he just does not know what it's like to not feel guilty about something.

But Akane kneels down to his eye level and shines a light on him. She cuts right through his dark thoughts, through his guilt, and takes that weight off his shoulders.

She won't let herself be another thing Aqua feels guilty about.

Most of all, she doesn't let Aqua blindside her with the image of himself that he sees. When Aqua wants to think the worst of himself, Akane reminds him of the kind person he is.

Look at his face. I love them 😭

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ONK Chapter 144 Spoilers

Queen behavior. How does she manage to be so good in such a lousy manga 😭

I've been following OnK veeeeeery loosely lately but I find it hilarious that Akane hasn't only been keeping an eye on Aqua's moves, she has also been following Kamiki. Since all of that has been off-paneled, I wonder if we'll one day just have Akane reveal that she already figured out that Aqua is Goro's reincarnation lmao

Considering that the movies show Doctor A dying in the same forest where Akane and Ruby find Goro's body, Akane should be able to tell that this is the same doctor Aqua told her about.

Except now she would also know that he died on the same night Aqua was born, which means there was absolutely no way for Aqua to have known him at all, least of all so intimately.

This was the missing piece of the puzzle and it's right there in the movie, so here's to hoping Akane has either already put 2 + 2 together off-panel or that she's on her way to do so.

If Akane finally figuring this out is in the cards, I wouldn't be surprised if we get a chapter that parallels Chapter 51 whenever S2 gets around to adapting these particular scenes 😂

Or he could save the parallel for whenever these scenes get adapted, since Chapter 51 will probably get its anime counterpart pretty early into the season.

All in all though this is the second time Akane and Kamiki have had contact with each other, I hope that Aka won't deny us of a proper confrontation eventually 😭

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Please help this Sudanese family get to safety!! Reblogs are much appreciated!!

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Shin-AeXNol- Les Amoureux

My first I Love Yoo video.

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"donate to gaza" "humanitarian aid to gaza" "raise money for gaza" and egypt, gaza's neighbor that has the only border through which aid can get through, cannot currently get aid through to gaza because israel is refusing to let the trucks pass. the gate was supposed to open three hours ago in a deal struck between egypt and the US to let foreign gaza nationals out and humanitarian aid in. now israel is denying it. Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's office said in a statement: "There is currently no truce and humanitarian aid in Gaza in exchange for getting foreigners out." and this is after israel bombed the border crossing three times in the past week. this is the reality that's happening right now. the tonnes of aid that countries are donating, the money the EU is promising, all of this is NOT GETTING THROUGH TO GAZA. if egyptians cannot get through to gaza, nobody can!!!!! the only fucking way this happens is through international pressure to hold israel accountable and that is currently not happening!!!

this is genocide. israel is a fascist state with genocidal maniacs in charge, and they want gazans obliterated, they want gaza gone. this is genocide happening right in front of us. and the entire first world has sanctioned it.

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"donate to gaza" "humanitarian aid to gaza" "raise money for gaza" and egypt, gaza's neighbor that has the only border through which aid can get through, cannot currently get aid through to gaza because israel is refusing to let the trucks pass. the gate was supposed to open three hours ago in a deal struck between egypt and the US to let foreign gaza nationals out and humanitarian aid in. now israel is denying it. Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's office said in a statement: "There is currently no truce and humanitarian aid in Gaza in exchange for getting foreigners out." and this is after israel bombed the border crossing three times in the past week. this is the reality that's happening right now. the tonnes of aid that countries are donating, the money the EU is promising, all of this is NOT GETTING THROUGH TO GAZA. if egyptians cannot get through to gaza, nobody can!!!!! the only fucking way this happens is through international pressure to hold israel accountable and that is currently not happening!!!

this is genocide. israel is a fascist state with genocidal maniacs in charge, and they want gazans obliterated, they want gaza gone. this is genocide happening right in front of us. and the entire first world has sanctioned it.

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Quimchee/ILY Update

Hey guys - as you've probably gathered, ILY is not updating tonight, nor did it update last week. I won't go into all the details because it's patreon content (subscribe if you can!) but this week's episode was supposed to be a big double episode, with like 200 panels (her minimum panels per episode is 50, so that's still 100 unpaid panels). Last week she talked about it to her editor and it was supposed to post this week as a special.

We can see that didn't happen.

WT is really fucking weird about how they do things - I have a whole rant about it on twitter here that is a QRT of another thread with information and links in the replies to the AMA on reddit I'm talking about, if you want some more information on the shoddy practices of WTs. In fact, I've been bitching about webtoon forever.

Anyway, I'm prefacing this because I want to ask you guys for understanding in why quimchee has not updated ILY in 2 weeks. This is an important episode, one that she does NOT want to have to chop up - we know how webtoon does, how they cut off her episodes at cliffhangers they choose, how they try to interrupt the flow, how the week-by-week format kills any tension. She already talked to her editor because she wanted to do this as a massive episode special. She has already done the work!!!! And, probably because they want to get two eps worth of FP payment said no and want her to break it up. So she's standing her ground and that's why we don't have an episode tonight - because WT doesn't want to give her any freedom to update HER webtoon the way SHE wants, doesn't care about quality only quantity.

But also that means she's out TWO weeks of paychecks, even though she spoke to her editor about posting as a double episode (which would have paid her as two episodes not one) and now here she is.

IF you have the means, please consider donating a little bit to quimchee on her ko-fi. I know we can't make up for two weeks of lost revenue, but it's more than WT is doing for her, more than her editor is vouching for her, more than HER EMPLOYER!!!!! is doing for her. She hasn't had payments on on patreon for ages so I just consider this my monthly patreon payment. I'd rather give her my money directly than go through those dirty rat bastards if I can help it.

But more than that I ask that you please be understanding of the situation - not that it would matter but this isn't a matter of quimcheee being unable to complete her episodes on time, but is quimchee standing her ground against a company who has done nothing but do her dirty THE ENTIRE TIME SHE'S BEEN WITH THEM.

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@skania 's post inspired me. My first aquakane video!

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In Which I Demonstrate that Nol Cannot Deny Shinae; the man is down bad

(I need someone to understand HOW CLOSE I cam to titling this “I can’t deny your eyes, you know I try to read between the lines” i’m so sorry i’m so very on my pop-punk bullshit right now)

One of my favorite dynamics of Shinae and Nol as a pairing and just in general part of how they interact is that it has been shown to us time and time again that Shinae has so much more power (for lack of better word lol) over Nol than I think has been given credit for sometimes. I think often people get very caught up in how Nol’s so very torn in his battle of what he wants vs what he thinks he deserves and the hurt that he ends up causing that sometimes they miss what the true root of it is: that though Nol genuinely believes he does not deserve good things as well as he believes harm will befall all those he cares about and thus he should stay away from the people he loves to protect them - he can’t. He fails. He tries over and over, he gave Kousuke his word, he makes the effort to pull away, but in the end he always caves, he always fails. 

When it comes to Shinae, his resolve crumbles. 

I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!

It’s such an important dynamic BECAUSE Nol is such a victim of what he believes and has been made to believe it’s hard to get through to him. How do you convince someone that all the abuse that has traumatized him wasn’t true. How do you take someone like him who has been made to feel that he is nothing but a worthless mistake, that he only creates problems, that he is a monster, that he brings doom wherever he goes that it’s not so? Especially with his own father telling him these things, with Kousuke tearing him down at every opportunity, with what happened when he was locked away, with the fact that Yui can, in fact, bring harm. And has? 

And yet, despite believing these things, despite internalizing that abuse to the extent that he cannot see anything else - his resolve still crumbles. Shinae has such an effect on him that I think deserves to be talked about, because she sees him when others don’t, she cares for him when others are accustomed to him caring for them, she picks up on these little things without being fully aware of them and in turn, Nol cannot help but want to stay close to pull her closer. And that’s exactly why he has to distance himself from her, from his friends - but we know the harder he struggles, the harder it becomes to maintain his resolve. 

I’m a sucker for it! I love watching the war on his face, the expressions that shift, the way he tries to weasel out of situations and ultimately fail because he can’t very well tell her to her face that he can’t be close to her, that he can’t stay her friend. But because he can never draw that boundary, he keeps moving the line in the sand. It doesn’t matter; he always fails in the end. 

This dynamic begins really early in! Shinae I think we could argue some other earlier moments also quality, but for this I want to specifically focus on post-formal moments, because I think what I love especially about this dynamic is that Nol has given Kousuke his word, has determined that he put Shinae in danger by taking interest in her and engaging in an indulgent friendship, and that for the sake of protecting her from further harm (and also due to his feelings of guilt) he needs to keep his distance and ease out of his friendship with her. 

But post-formal it’s not so easy. Shinae has gone from trying to fend him off to a stick to openly expressing concern for him. She now takes a leaf out his book and reaches out to him - over and over and over. 

It would be easy to not call her back. Catch up later and casually brush her off that he had a big family thing, that he fell asleep early. And yet, in the end, he fails and he winds up returning her call. Even though it’s a call for her reassurance, it’s just as much a call for him, taking in her concern for him, that little admission that maybe he is the villain like they think. He has a way of slipping up with Shinae, always confessing something real. She disarms him as much as she pulls him in and GOD I cannot help but adore this dynamic! 

Another thing that goes hand in hand with this dynamic is that not only does Nol struggle to maintain that distance and create a berth of space between them, but he also continues to struggle to not go above and beyond for her. Shinae isn’t good at accepting favors or letting people do things for them, and I think if she knew that he completely took the blame for her tardiness in addition to going out of his way to go pick her up, she probably would get pretty annoyed. But as it stands, he does exactly that - not only takes the blame, but goes out of his way to pick her up. 

It’s something about his expression after their call, when he looks like he’s torn on what to do, or perhaps torn on what is the best option? Torn on knowing that part of him has already made up his mind he’ll go to her even though he’s trying to convince himself he shouldn’t? He struggles with her at all times and ultimately she always has that effect on him - he just is unable to make himself resist, to NOT go to her, to NOT help her. 

(It’s like when he gets mad at how Kousuke is treating her as an employee and calls him out on it! It’s things he doesn’t need to do, but it’s the fact that he can’t help it that betrays how much he cares, how much she affects him, how much he is unable to just walk away.) 

Nol definitely seems aware of this, too. The moment he gives her the opportunity, he won’t be able to push that distance, so he tries to take advantage in the moments he can. Finding Shinae in the locker room leaves him the opportunity to sneak out, but unfortunately for him she takes notice of him and stops him in his tracks. Part of it is, of course, what he told Kousuke - that he can’t just suddenly cut her off without explaining why, and it’s difficult to ease things when she’s the one who keeps reaching out now, keeps grabbing on to him.

But again, we see that his undoing is that he cares. He’s never seen her like this and she’s willing to actually open up and talk about what’s bothering him? It’s so unlike her! (I love him telling her she has to use words because he can’t help her otherwise lol) 

But what this moment demonstrates is, again, just one of my favorite parts - even when he TRIES to distance himself - he angles himself away from her, body turned away - he always ends up angled right back in. Nol and Shinae have this magnetic draw with each other and even when he makes the effort to turn away from her, he can’t help but be drawn back in, angle right back in to her. It’s something really fun to take note of when you reread, watching the way they just veer in towards each other, drift towards each other.

I’m sure he isn’t aware of it. She sure doesn’t seem to be! It’s just gravitational. Where she is, he will move towards. Where he is, she will drift towards. Their body language conveys that closeness! 

For MANY reasons, the moment they share after work, before Shinae starts her shift at the Wac is one of my FAVORITES. I always feel like it’s the clearest representation of this dynamic, too, of how Nol tries to point himself away, tries to push that distance, but he can’t and he even admits why! Nothing will stop him from caring - she has just wormed her way into his life, wormed her way into his heart. He cares about what happens to her, how she’s treated, how she’s doing, how she’s feeling. He cares and he can’t just stop being her friend! He cares and he can’t just pretend he doesn’t. 

It must take a lot of effort for him to consciously be aware of this - having to be conscious about turning away from her, of creating that space that’s so hard maintain. 

None of it was supposed to be real to matter and yet here he is, helpless against her, unable to stop himself from caring. 

To Nol’s credit, we do see him trying to make more effort - but also to his credit, the harder he tries to pull away, the harder Shinae fights. It’s funny and kind of ironic, because he’s one of the reasons she’s trying so hard. He’s the one who has helped her see value in herself and to open up and rely on others, and as a result, she’s practicing all of her new friend skills on him. How is he supposed to keep pushing her away when she’s literally calling him out (because she now knows him well enough to do that!) AND she’s making him talk through things. 

Shinae doesn’t want another Alyssa repeat and she’s not going to let Nol get away with just pulling away without an explanation. What else can he do? 

I like that’s really surprised he actually stayed - he could have faked a call from Nana that he had to head home, could have found some other excuse. But she demanded he would wait and he gave her his word. 

I love them ;A; 

Time and time again, she disarms him. Time and time again his resolve is put to the test and fails when it concerns his feelings, how much he cares, what kind of significance she has to him. Shinae saying out loud that their friendship must not have meant anything being the trigger that makes him finally act on what he always denies himself - a hand reaching out to her over and over that never makes contact, that he always talks himself out of finally making contact and pulling her into that tight, clinging embrace. On the one hand, we know it began as fake, that it wasn’t supposed to mean anything and certainly not to him.

But we know it was so real. We know that there was a moment where he went from trying to help Dieter, to trying to help her instead, to befriending her for his own enjoyment. It was all so very real, even if it hurts in the end. It was all so real to him and even if he needs her to be angry at him, even if he (thinks he) needs to walk away and leave all of this behind, he still can’t bear to have her think none of it meant anything, none of it was real, none of it mattered when it mattered so much to him. When it mattered so much that he finally embraced her!!!!!!! 

EVEN IN THIS MOMENT! HIS RESOLVE CRUMBLES. And though he’s able to pull himself together enough to do what he set out to do, let’s not forget that it was only because he was reminded her of injury, of what he believes was the culmination of him befriending someone and pulling them into the nightmare wake he leaves where he goes. It was only because he was reminded that she could have been another life taken from him that he was able to walk away. 

(And yknow. Proceeded to retch as a result. alfjakfjkafjkafjk) 

He goes as far as blocking Shinae, Dieter, and Soushi, because he knows he’ll cave. Because he can’t bear to see their messages, to ignore their calls, to see how much they are trying how hard they are fighting and reaching out, because just like when Shinae questioned if any of it was real, he knows he’ll cave. He has to implement a means of denying himself access to them, to nearly physically block them out. 

And yet, in that moment, at a party he doesn’t want to be at on a day he doesn’t want to exist on the eve of him serving time for a crime he doesn’t deserve, he goes and looks at his spam. 

He knows what’s in there waiting for him. He knows what he’s going to see.

He still does it, anyway. 

And there she is, a message received just now about feelings he feels but thinks he isn’t allowed that he shouldn’t have. 

I love this pathetic man, please I need more. 

He tries SO hard, even after hearing Shinae’s unprompted love soliloquy heartfelt sentimental explanation of what Nol means to her, to turn his back, but he can’t. 

His mother’s words are right there, and though they aimed for Rand, they come to land with him. The world can’t punish you forever. Does he not deserve their love, their friendship, the people who matter to him? Does he not deserve to be left alone by the world, to live his life as much as anyone else?

Even when everything he fears lingers over him - he’ll regret this because nothing good comes of indulging, because nothing good comes from letting them in because not only does it put them in danger but it makes it harder and harder for him. 

Like, not to be cheesy but we already know I am so - every time he lets them down, every time he breaks their hearts, he breaks his own, too. 

There’s no more fighting it. There’s only them and an empty hospital room, and a rare of sense of peace and calm, his head on her shoulder, finding comforting (literally) leaning on someone for once. For one moment, he grants himself an opportunity to stop trying to be so strong, to give in to seeking comfort. 

When she reassures him he’s not at Hirahara Memorial and he actually turns his face in towards the crook of her neck? Allowing himself to indulge in this peace in this comfort in this warmth?

GODDDDDDDD I love it he deserves it I want MORE  

And just like that, he’s no longer fighting. I’m including these even though it’s not really a “Nol tried to refrain and failed in the end” because a. we deserve them and b. I think by virtue of Nol acting on his desires and indulging in what he wants while Soushi and Dieter are sleeping in the bed on the other side of them counts enough for this list. Because refraining is no longer on the brain. Because everything Shinae does disarms him and he can’t even pretend to keep the wall up anymore. 

Shinae gets so embarrassed about giving him her gift because she feels like it pales compared to what Dieter did, but probably also because there is a sense of sentimentality to it as well, and it doesn’t miss Nol. It’s the fact that it’s their Orange of Fate, what she drew on his face, and the words she uttered when they first met that have now been taken back. 

It’s how he went from being told all people suck that she wants no friendship to chasing him outside of his school and fighting so hard for him, calling and texting and trying to reach him, it’s how she took advantage of the opportunity when it presented itself to tell him how she feels and what he means and she got so shy about him seeing this gift and it strikes him so much because he knows what he means to her and she means it, too, she’s that special to him, too

And the hand that earlier in the night reached for the spot she denied him does it once again and this time his fingers are in her hair, this time he’s so close in her space, this time he doesn’t deny himself what he wants and what he wants is to be so close to her, what he wants is to stay in this dream as long as he possibly can 

And the most indulgent of them all. 

Let’s not pretend this is not for him. Let’s not pretend this is the most indulgently he’s ever acted on what he wants. Shinae outrules fullbody dancing and he’s like oh bet? lmaoooooo 

He wants the dance. He wanted it back in Minhyuk’s room before Kousuke showed up and everything went to hell. He wants it now and he’s acting on it. There’s no reason - present in his mind lol - for him to refuse what he wants. 

He has refrained SO MUCH. He has refrained for SO LONG. So many times he reached out to her. The dance offer at the Kim formal that Kousuke stared him down into rejecting. Every time he’s felt suffocated by the weight of the world, by the burden of the guilt he carries, by the inherent belief that he’s a monster incapable of providing good, every time he’s been reminded he only brings people pain, every little moment that reminds him he doesn’t deserve any of the things he seeks out, the enjoyment he indulges in. So much of it has weighed him down and in that moment he acts on it

on what he wants

on what he needs

on what he feels 

He acts on the feelings that she is special that she brings him comfort that he wants and wants when she’s in his proximity

He acts on the dream from which he’s afraid to wake and he asks her to dance with him

Despite his back injury. Despite the whole night reminding him that pain follows him wherever he goes. Despite their friends sleeping just a bed over. 

He gives in and he indulges. 

Honorable mention goes to Nol staying outside Shinae’s door at Hirahara Memorial, despite this being a place of trauma and fear for him, despite how much he hates hospitals, despite Kousuke sending him away. It gets honorable mention because I acknowledge part of what compels him to stay outside her door is that he feels so guilty and he needs to see/know for himself that she’s okay - but I think it still counts because of just how compelling it is for him. That this is a person he has grown to care about so much already, a person who we now know he literally is alive for/because, since it was only when he saw her in the pool that he determined he couldn’t stay down there and had to return to the surface to save her, to carry on as Yeonggi for a little longer. 

He stays outside her hospital room because he can’t help it.

He could go home, he could change out of his damp clothes, he could crawl into bed and try to forget this whole nightmare of a night, if only for a few hours, but instead he stays outside her room, unable to leave. 

At every opportunity, Nol is so compelled by Shinae. 

He cannot deny her. 

If Shinae wants it, he will ultimately yield it to her like he has his heart.

I’m being good and not including anything from 231 but JUST YOU WAIT FOR THE FOLLOW UP, especially those of you who don’t fast pass. JUST YOU WAIT. 

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My theories

1.Shin Hye is not Sim Han's biological daughter. That is why she is trying to approach Shin Ae in such a way. She is afraid that Sim Han won't want to see her

2. I ship her with Min Hyuk.

Min Hyuk is overprotective of Shin Ae after her accident. He blames himself for not being there to save her. I think Shin Hye will help understand that he has gone overboard with his protection

3. At first I thought Yui dragged Nol causing him to attack Kousuke, but now I think Yui dragged Kousuke to make it seem as if Nol attacked him. His robot behaviour is not only a result of her gaslighting and manipulation, but of her dragging him too. I think whatever happened to Nessa and the CFO's strock have something to do with her.