repentic

[repentic]

@peacefulapostle || continued from here || why? because i can!

There’s nothing but love and love and love pouring from Joseph’s gaze as he watches his younger brother moving about his kitchen. Happiness in the fact that Paul is where he belongs at last. Free from addiction. Free from the hell he voluntarily put himself into time and time again. Whole and happy and healthy. The way God intended for one of his most faithful to be. Not dredging through gutters trying to meet death over and over. Because that was all he considered himself worthy of. No, no. His Apostle is worthy of so much more. 

Including this birthday celebration. One that Joseph has come to join him in. For a whole day. No services. No meetings. Only him and Paul. The way it should be. Until the other two brothers and Faith come. But that is a surprise for later. Joseph smiles, nodding as he nudges himself off the wall and moves towards the table. “Who am I to say no to something that smells so far too TEMPTING to turn down?” He sits, pulling his mug closer towards himself and turning his attention up to Paul as the ceramic slides across wood. “Are you? Happy? That’s all I ever wanted. Bringing you here was meant to give you all you deserved. I am glad it has. And to have you here today? With ME? Means the world..”

[repentic]

Revelation 6:8

Far Cry 5 // Far Cry: New Dawn

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🤷 🤷 🤷

@youhavebeenmarked influenced me to draw this. thanks fam

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𝚒 𝚜𝚙𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚖𝚢 𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚛𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚊𝚢 𝚢𝚎𝚜 𝚝𝚘    — ind. & selective john seed from far cry 5. —  heavy religious themes & triggering content  — written by cyn.

[repentic]

                                 They were honey on my lips                                    Then a bitter twist in my side                                 I knew they’d lay me in my grave                      "Is there no one who could save me?“ I cried

INDIE SEED SIBLING OC from FAR CRY 5 CREATED BY: MONROE EST: MAY 2018

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paul doesn't understand, explain it to him joseph! he won't listen to me. tell him what i do is for the betterment of mankind! to cleanse their souls!

dear brother. i think that you could learn from paul’s ways. taking the anger out of leading those who are damned is something you must understand is necessary. or the beginning of their new life will be as tarnished as the one they are ascending from.

and paul? paul could learn from you. to understand that the world is not as kind as he is. that he is something pure, meant to be protected, but will soon have to realize that there will be a time when none of our hands will remain unbloodied. 

you balance one another and the time has long passed where you, my dearest john, must not only lead him to strength to do what needs to be done but allow yourself to be lead into his light and let it fill those parts of you that still cling to the dark.

do you understand me? please tell me this is not in vain. that my love for you both hasn’t clouded either one of your chances for salvation. i cannot do this without either one of you. and i will not.

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YOU'RE SUCH A MENACE

// says the menace of menaces. PSHHHH. i think you need to think about repenting for that. i’ll wait. you got five minutes. 

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DO YOU MOCK THE CLEANSING JOHN!?

[repentic]

peacefulapostle‌.

what the fuck. @apostleled ordered a pizza to be sent to my house and its being delivered by a guy named jacob. WTF IS THIS SHIT. 

trust. prey. deliv-er-ray!

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“If it’s family, you protect. Doesn’t matter who it is, blood or not.”

— Aveline (via steelbloom)

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Official illustrations of a place of Joseph Seed known as “The Father” by Andrew Averkin

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gentle reminder that i love joseph seed.

// that and i really need to do more things here again. like. soon. idk. i miss this dude. and his dumb brothers. that includes @peacefulapostle and @sanctemony. joseph’s birthday bro (aka the good one) and murder chair bro (aka the problem child).

[repentic]

peacefulapostle‌.

knowing he should be in the comfort of his own home   ,  the apostle is stubborn  .  it was his idea to come here in the middle of the night after calling joseph for help .  it took a lot to ask for it  , but the first step is admittance right ?  paul is in dire need of assistance and asking for it is harder than he’s ever had to deal with because he does not want his family to judge him  ,  they are all that he has and he feels as if he’s already failed them . 

this pain is worse than has ever been felt  ,  his bones ache to the very marrow and each nerve stands on end when it comes rolling through  .  his teeth do chatter and his skin crawls which takes more strength than he has to refuse  .  why can’t he just feel normal  ?  eyes close with the fingers on his temple  ,  paul is still shivering under the touch if only still a little comforted  .  TRUST IN GOD !! If only it was that simple  .  why isn’t it as easy as he makes it sound  ?? 

 one thing he does have right is that he has SURVIVED this long  ,  but only just barely  . BARELY being too strong of a word considering the condition that joseph found him in  .   before he can register the intent  ,  paul is pulled into joseph’s lap and somehow he feels like a kid again as if he’s been in this exact position before .  had this been something he did when they were younger that paul simply does not remember  ??  feels like it  . 

he feels weak despite joseph telling him otherwise  ,  for the withdrawals ravage him making him close in on himself while joseph runs his hands through his hair  .  with hands in his hair and his brother close  ,  paul knows that this could be MUCH WORSE than it is and for that he is grateful  . ❝  i don’t want to feel like this anymore  .  and i don’t want to be alone anymore  ,  ❞ he says using one hand to cling to his brothers knees  .  if he can pull through this its only up hill from there right  ?? 

Paul will not be like this forever. There’s a hellish path he must travel on in order to overcome his demons. Fortunately? He is in the hands of those who love him most. FAMILY. Who will guide him along. Protect him. Heal him. Joseph’s touch never ceases to comb through long strands of hair. Or swipe lovingly over Paul’s cheekbones. His temples. Shoulder. Anything to promise him he will never be alone. Not again. Not ever again.

“You are not alone, my Paul. I am here. Your brothers. We love you and this pain? It’s temporary. Then? I will never allow you this agony again.” Joseph’s voice is soft. Careful. Sympathetic and soothing. A velvet tone, deep and loving. “Once it is over. We will see you through healing and there will be peace. For that is what you are. Peace inside the wreckage of what time, loneliness. Of what this world has done to you. That hollowness is over now. Filled with love instead.”

Joseph hums. Amazing Grace. How sweet the sound. The melody is clear as day. As they began to rock slowly. Motion of the sea and comfort found there in is the intention. “You have a home. People who will love you. Guide you. Follow in the footsteps of a strength inside of you that you have done nothing but doubt. No more fear. No more doubt. Trust in yourself. Trust in me. In God, all things are possible. Even coming back from this.”

Keeping one hand inside Paul’s hair, Joseph covers the other resting against his knee. Cupping the flesh and holding it in his palm with such reverence that there is nothing but adoration behind the touch. Warmth exudes between their hands. “Hope County? It will embrace you. Everyone will see that you shine brilliantly. Walk towards that path. Let it guide you from this shadow. Follow my words. I’ll be with you every step of the way.”

[repentic]

eden’s gate moodboard.

　“ Jesus said to her, I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me will live, even though they die. ”

— john, 11:25.

[repentic]

peacefulapostle‌.

paul’s eyes teary and red are closed, his head bowed and trembling fingertips set right at his lips. every word spoken by his brother is like a soft prayer in the dimly lit church where only the two of them occupy for now. the new arrival to hope county is unsure and he is TERRIFIED for what is to come. to think that he could have been nothing more than a blemish on the asphalt if it hadn’t been for joseph. oh what a miraculous intervention, one enough to make him BELIEVE everything that has been said to him on this long journey. 

his NEED is slowly creeping up in that time, its resulting in cold sweats and aches have been the longest he’s been in a long time without getting some sort of fix. a hand comes down on his shoulder and joseph’s forehead meets his own and the tears start falling again.   

“give me hope in the darkness that i will see the light” joseph says nothing more than a whisper. and it forces a choked sob to emit further. only hours ago hope was nothing more than a memory. something he hadn’t had in YEARS. 

he’s been lost for so long that he doesn’t feel WORTH saving, but yet his brother is here. HE SAVED HIM from his own self-destruction. and now he speaks to him as if he is worth EVERYTHING.  “please, brother,” paul pleads, his voice pained and cracking. “i can’t live like this anymore…” 

Sympathy. It flows from Joseph’s entire being. Sympathy and sadness. To see his sweet brother reduced to detox. Cold sweats, shaking. Teeth chattering and gut wrenching pain. Tears in his eyes? They’re reflected in the Prophet’s. Joseph watches Paul shiver beside him. Watches how he trembles with fearing the pending agony his body is soon to give him another round of. Oh, he would do anything to take it upon himself. To suffer so Paul would not. But it is essential to the Apostle. If that is who he is destined to be. To know this pain in order to overcome it and become what he is. Who he truly is.

Their foreheads meet and they both begin to shed tears. Fingers drift up the sides of Paul’s temples. His right hand doesn’t stop moving until it’s cupping the back of his head. The left swipes faint circles along Paul’s temple before tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. His voice is a whisper. Cracked but so gentle it could be a lullaby. Paul only shatters more in it’s softness.

“You are HOME, brother. Trust in God. Trust in me. You will be seen through this. You are far stronger than you give yourself credit for. You’ve already survived alone for so long. You are not alone in this. You have your family. You have me.” Watery eyes open and he clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth. 

In one fluid motion, Paul’s not given an opportunity to object. Instead, he’s guided downwards with gentle instructions on how to shift his body until the man is curled up on the pew with his upper body in Joseph’s lap. The lengths of both hands bury themselves in Paul’s hair, petting it back out of his face until his profile is bared to Joseph. With the church locked down, it is only them or their brothers who may enter. No one will see this. Because this is the beginning of Paul’s awakening from years spent trapped inside of a nightmare. A moment for only them.

[repentic]

when are you gonna learn that not every problem can be solved with a                      bullet?

[repentic]

warkept‌.

               Everything about Joseph drew him in ; he was his salvation. To an extent, more so than the rest that Joseph was tasked with saving, Ashley was devout. Their nights spent together, the times Joseph had asked him for his company rather than his gun or his blade or his body as a shield, it had brought them closer. Ashley knew he was held closer than most in the flock, yet he was never able to read how Joseph truly felt about him.

                 It was wishful thinking, but he wonders every now and then if he is more than a tool. Ashley finally looks at Joseph, curiosity piqued by his words. Jacob ; Ashley knew not much more than his cruelty. The conditioning failed to effect Ashley, though the pain he endured still clung to him. Jacob may be cruel, but the things Ashley has endured in the past were much crueler. “ You may speak freely around me, if you so wish. I’m sure Jacob wouldn’t mind you telling tales of him. ”

                  Their eyes meet when Joseph glances up, and Ashley sighs. Fingers knit awkwardly in his lap, and he looks away. “ You do much in attempts to comfort me. ” A pause, and a sigh. At times, he felt like Joseph viewed him as weak, someone who needed constant attention. Most things he did with Ashley, he did for the sake of trying to make the soldier feel content. It pries at his brain to know if anything Ashley does Joseph finds comfort in.

                “ I will not force my sister’s superstition upon you because you think it will ease my guilt, ” he says, and it feels odd to speak so freely around the Father. “ Tell me, Father, what would bring you comfort ?? You know I would do anything. Command me, and I shall obey. Do you wish for company ?? We can speak. I will offer whatever comforts I can. Please, ” his voice cracks for a moment, something uncharacteristic of him. “ Focus on yourself. On what makes you happy. I am okay. ”

Joseph seemed to think over his skipping a tale about Jacob after Ashley’s encouragement to share what was on his mind. He’d asked for companionship from the being, hadn’t he? Weeks ago. A conversation that they shared included those words. Yet, here he is. Wounded and seeking to converse while shrugging off any attempt to do that which he asked for. It’s nonsense. Hypocritical. 

The realization of it has his jaw clamping shut as he chastises himself. Teeth bite into the back of his tongue, his eyes close and then all at once? It’s over. “My brother used to tell me stories. Do whatever he could to protect me. To take away pain. To patch up whatever hurt. Comfort me in the worst times. Siblings. What would we be without them, hm?”

Ashley’s concern strikes Joseph as a surprise. Does it seem that way? His brows crinkle. “Comfort you.How?” The sigh that leaves Ashley’s lips is even more confusing. Does he see conversation as comfort? “I don’t understand what you see as comfort.” It makes him curious. Does Ashley see the way he’s treated as something other than it is? God sent Ashley to him. If it’s abuse he is seeking? He is on the wrong side.

Rather than focusing on his wound. Or acknowledging it whatsoever. Joseph’s eyes comb across Ashley’s expression when the being’s voice cracks. What has put him in such a state? His hand lifts to cup Ashley’s cheek and fingertips spread across his cheekbone. “You can begin by telling me what has your voice unsteady and your eyes so desperate. First? Perhaps your sister was right. We won’t know until you try..”

“I’m not in the habit of catching superstitions.” He goes quiet. Expectant. What he asked for, he expects to be granted. Including the truth as to what has Ashley so unsteady. If for no other reason than it being something deeper that could open them up to far worse things than simple flesh wounds should it bring Ashley to a compromise.