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Mark my words, Uzumaki.

One day, I will score a squeeze of that booty.

One day!!

No one can touch her booty– its too great.

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Scoot, halt.

Scoot, halt.

He’s very glad Urushi didn’t bring a metric shit ton of children into his office. Kabuto doesn’t like children, they’re noisy and sticky, they’re rude and uncontrollable - and he can’t yell at them, because then they’ll cry and crying is disgusting.

“I appreciate you’re busy. If you need to get back...?”

This isn’t him trying to boot Urushi out so soon. He’s just concerned - people that can work with kids aren’t everywhere, and they’re very important to the children they work with too.

“I’m doing alright. I just wish my patients weren’t so... Stupid.”

“Still. Can’t be helped. How’ve things been for you, Urushi?”

Did he detect a hint of bitterness?

Urushi was stunned. Years and years, and now finally Kabuto was smack dab in front of him–still as nerdy as ever, and on a wheelie chair no less.

“The others would have come, but there’s an influx of orphans and-” he heaved a sigh; what an entrance,  “-a shortage of hands.” And it wasn’t like he was going to drag all of them here. Dozens of kids running around poor Kabuto’s office? The horror.

He entered cautiously, glancing about the room before settling his gaze on the other. Kabuto didn’t look to be the hugging type–not at the moment anyway–so that plan was out.

“How have you been?”

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Touché.

hm.

how about go suck a dick.

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Wheelie chair master race tbh.

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Holy shit.

Dat ass. 10/10 lemme tap.

MY ASS YOU DID!

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I FUCKING KNEW IT.

Like she’d tell anyone, especially Kabuto.  It’s the Pure Uzumaki blood

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What is her secret? How does she manage to be permanently 10/10.

She wakes up FLAWLESS. 

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Shit, she might have me there.

He wishes he woke up this fanfuckingtastic.

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See Karin--

Is still better than her.

See Kabuto– 

Refuses to acknowledge the loser.

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Knock knock.

Eyes twitch to give the door a sidelong stare. The heavens had answered his call! He was just thinking people should stop trying - not that they knew -to get him to confront his pat and his painful lack of knowledge concerning his mother’s not recognising him.

And here they were! People, coming to him! So he scoots over to the door in his wheelie chair and opens the door, giving the other - Urushi - a stare. It was just Urushi? Well, alright then. Not quite the ‘Orphanage’ but one out of... However many there were in that building, now, was still a small victory.

“I was just thinking about you, how remarkable.”

And he scoots back to his desk. Silent permission to enter.

Urushi wasn’t the type to accept defeat; he’d lived through, tolerated and thus mastered too many years of naughty, stubborn children to let something like this get the best of his persistence. 

Showing up out of the blue seemed rude, but after a heavy sigh, he was packing for departure. The last and final note issued had warned of his coming, if his little brother had even bothered to read it, and he wouldn’t sit here any longer.

The other nun could watch the children. By the time lunch hits, he’s already at the office door, knocking on the it before the butterflies in his stomach can stop him. 

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-- Open

He stares for a moment, before sighing and scooting across the office on his wheelie chair, returning to his desk and jamming an elbow atop it, putting his chin in his hand and gesturing to the chair across the desk - a visual invitation for the intruder to take the seat before his temper sees him removing them from his office.

It was lunchtime.

He’d wanted to eat lunch.

This was not eating lunch.

“Okay, let’s make it quick. Are you dying?”

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So she was paying attention. But now he has poisoned coffee... Perhaps he should’ve thought this plan through better.

Takes a sip of her coffee after switching his and hers. What was once his was now hers. What once was hers is now his. Good luck being poisoned, ya jackass. 

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-- brother-in-waiting

Scrunch scrunch scrunch.

The note isn’t even opened - he can recognise the handwriting. Just scrunched into a ball and tossed, from his seat at his desk, at the bin in the corner of the office - it bounces off the wall and lands dead centre of the bin, on top of all the other scrunched up ‘Why aren’t you visiting!?’ notes that Urushi has sent him.

Why, Kabuto asks, does he have to go to the Orphanage? Can the Orphanage not come to him? Can the people that were - and, he supposed, still are - his siblings not come to him? He didn’t want to be in that hall of memories, when the most painful of his own had yet to be confirmed.

“Maybe he’ll give up tomorrow.”

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[ Expedient Leaf Genius ]

So it got long. I’m hoping it makes sense, ‘cause it’s been a long ol’ while since I’ve had to think about that situation and it’s probably a veeerrryyy long stretch and might even be utter crap but--

Kabuto is a weenie and I love him. If y’wanna have a play in this verse, hit me up.

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You know that feel?

That feel in your heart, when you miss a ‘Thing’.

Yeah, I’m getting that now. So I’mma do the one thing I said I’d never do again - I’m gonna bring back the good ol’ Konohaverse for Kabuto. 8′)

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-- mindfucx

He stares for a moment, brows furrowed slightly before he turns on heel to see if anyone else is around. No-one. And no intrusion alerts either - but that’s not the problem he’s finding himself focussing on, no. Because she doesn’t look like she’s geared up for an invasion of any sort, she looks as though she dressed for a stroll in the woods.

“Uh... Yamanaka? What, uh--”

He’s at a loss.

How did a lone Konoha nin make it not only through the Land of Sound, but into Otogakure and into Orochimaru’s lair without alerting a single person? And how the hell did he get his hands on that sort of skill? He could really do with that.

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-- chainedchakra

Drops some arsenic in her coffee when she’s not looking. This is all part of the training, to make sure she’s paying a-fucking-ttention.