roach-witch

[roach-witch]

As much mileage as I’ve gotten out of same love I stand by you need to calm down by Taylor swift being the worst straight person pride song I don’t think people fully appreciate how bad the lyrics are

[roach-witch]

Something I find incredibly cool is that they’ve found neandertal bone tools made from polished rib bones, and they couldn’t figure out what they were for for the life of them. 

Until, of course, they showed it to a traditional leatherworker and she took one look at it and said “Oh yeah sure that’s a leather burnisher, you use it to close the pores of leather and work oil into the hide to make it waterproof. Mine looks just the same.” 

“Wait you’re still using the exact same fucking thing 50,000 years later???”

“Well, yeah. We’ve tried other things. Metal scratches up and damages the hide. Wood splinters and wears out. Bone lasts forever and gives the best polish. There are new, cheaper plastic ones, but they crack and break after a couple years. A bone polisher is nearly indestructible, and only gets better with age. The more you use a bone polisher the better it works.”

It’s just. 

50,000 years. 50,000. And over that huge arc of time, we’ve been quietly using the exact same thing, unchanged, because we simply haven’t found anything better to do the job. 

[roach-witch]

the more i hear abt that lilo n stitch remake the more im like oh this isn’t just like. a bad remake it’s actually deeply deeply evil in a way that i hope reaps some sort of cosmic punishment

[roach-witch]

i completely understand & agree with the backlash against students using chatgpt to get degrees but some of you are out here saying "getting a degree in xyz means pulling multiple consecutive all-nighters and writing essays through debilitating migraines and having severe back pain from constantly studying at your desk and chugging energy drinks until you get a kidney stone and waking up wishing you were dead every day, and that's just part of the natural process of learning!!!" and like. umm. i don't think that any of us should have had to endure that either. like maybe the solution for stopping students from using anti-learning software depends on college institutions making the process of learning actually sustainable on the human body & mind rather than a grueling health-destroying soul-crushing endeavor

[roach-witch]

let's 😐 with mama

[roach-witch]

Good morning

[roach-witch]

Maid cleaning a massive chateau surely belonging to the richest people you’ve ever seen, and as she’s walking from room to room you notice that every single portrait is of her

[roach-witch]

a few days ago i woke up thinking: snails are cute, but what if they had legs?

so i made this, and i was like "aww yeahhh such a funny animal"

and then a second image popped up in my head

what if they acted like dogs?

YEAAAAHHHHH HAPPY PUPPY SNAIL

[roach-witch]

“Grandma, it’s me, Anastasia!”

Anastasia (1997) Ocean’s Eight (2018) Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (2018) Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith (2005) The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) The Witches (1990)

[roach-witch]

we could go back to telegraphs instead of social media. send your mutuals unspeakable strings of morse code at 4:30am

[roach-witch]

i CANNOT stop thinking about this job ad. i am absolutely losing it over the implication that someone is going to apply to this job who 1) loves chasing birds and 2) is disturbingly competetive about it

[roach-witch]

[roach-witch]

"why did your cat bite me" you pet her incorrectly. deserved

[roach-witch]

[roach-witch]

[roach-witch]

The OT3: Hitter, Hacker, Thief.

"Live together. Lots of touching. Emotionally entangled. Doesn't sound like they're coworkers."

Co-created with @laser-tripwires