roadsidecannibalism

[roadsidecannibalism]

I have a two headed calf on my leg actually :D

and as he stares into the sky, there are twice as many stars as usual

[roadsidecannibalism]

I’m just someone’s weird and gay brother

[roadsidecannibalism]

sorry ignore me im going through something (<- guy who never stopped going through something)

[roadsidecannibalism]

manic pixie dream divorced guy

[roadsidecannibalism]

They should invent a career path that isn't soooooooo scary

[roadsidecannibalism]

life is about doing arts & crafts btw

[roadsidecannibalism]

I’ve decided to implement more nonsense into my life

[roadsidecannibalism]

the most compelling thing a guy can ever say is to another guy and it's "i wish you were a girl" . like record scratch. wow the implications that this phrase has. i think it needs its own bechdel test

[roadsidecannibalism]

like im not even a lesbian but when i see a butch relief and respect washes over me like how i presume an american feels when they see a member of the military or perhaps ronald mac donald.

[roadsidecannibalism]

📦 Shipping update: we're not delivering your parcel because you checked the tracking page too much and we got shy about it

[roadsidecannibalism]

goes to the library to do fuck all & be very scared

[roadsidecannibalism]

Mice religion places extreme importance on scampering and little adventures

[roadsidecannibalism]

Wanting top surgery so I can sleep face down shirtless in boxers like the lazy teenage boys at the start of 90s films

[roadsidecannibalism]

[roadsidecannibalism]

hey man i get that it’s your thing but you are making people uncomfortable by, and these are your words, “blair witching it” in the corner

[roadsidecannibalism]

I’d be a stem kid

if we lived in a world where u had to do the career u were first interested in as a child what would u be doing, id be a firefighter

[roadsidecannibalism]

meetcute idea: your packer slides down your pant leg and falls out and you’re mortified as hell but a guy picks it up and puts it in his pants instead and runs away reallyfast so you have to chase after him and get ur oenis back