royaltee98

[royaltee98]

A lot has happened...

Since the last time I wrote on my blog, I have been to my happy place the beach multiple times feeling the hot sand and cool water between my toes. It has been one year since my wound has been healed and every day I am beyond grateful to God for hearing my prayers day in and day out. My grandma passed in October 2032 and I graduated in Dec 2023 those 3 months were very tough on me mentally because my grandma was my everything, and her not being there physically took a toll on me but life has to move on. Walking across and earning my diploma I felt so proud of myself, hearing my sister and seeing my family in the crowd cheering me on was the best day ever.

Now, I am just living life and waiting to see what God has for me next. Until next time write soon... Love TB

[royaltee98]

It’s been 10 months…

January 6.2022 was the best day mentally and emotionally. My wound finally closed, I got to wear sandals and shorts again, and I got to experience the beach with my sister for the first time in 11 years in August also my self-confidence showed again I felt like myself again I felt happy.

These past few weeks I felt some small pains thinking it was a scab, so I just ignored it. Two weeks ago on Wednesday, I was in the shower cleaning my feet and I rubbed the wrong way. I started to panic the water was stinging 🔥 I got out of the shower and looked at my foot I saw nothing no small cuts or scrapes so I carry on about my day. My foot kept on hurting, hurting and I started to limp more.

Yesterday (October 31.2022 Halloween) I had an appointment at the wound care doctor again just to see what was going on with my foot. I was telling the nurse I think it was just a scab come to find out it was a wound I have been mentally and emotionally drained dealing with these wounds. These wounds have taken my whole teenage years and the beginning of my adult life. I can not do another wound it's been every year since I was thirteen I had one or two wounds on my feet. One would heal and even nine months later another would just appear and the worst thing is the doctors don't know why the wounds keep appearing. I take my meds, I drink water, I dress according to the weather, I eat pretty healthy sometimes now that I have gallstones, I get enough sleep, and I try not to overstress, overthink, over worry, overexert myself as much as possible. I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND THE REASON WHY!!!! This has taken a big toll on me.

So until next time write soon...

Love TB

[royaltee98]

August 8.2022 Best. surprise. ever

I have the best sister in the ENTIRE WORLD!! This morning I told myself that I was tired of always walking around the house in my pajamas, so I changed into a beige tee shirt and lose-fitting paper bag shorts something cute but comfortable. I grabbed my Bible and turned on my Christian fire playlist I was reading and jamming out to the music after when I was finished reading I always tell myself today is going to be a great day and it definitely was.

I made myself some maple & brown sugar oatmeal and turned on Chloe Yazmean on YouTube she is so funny, real, and a Christian. After I finished my oatmeal I polish my nails white I love a clean white polish look on my nails and toes but I haven’t gotten my feet done professionally in 10 years due to my wound in previous years don’t get it twisted I do cut toes nails. So I polished my nails and as they were drying my sister woke up and said to get dressed I told her I just polished my nails but I did it always. I was planning the outfit in my head I was going to wear a plain shirt and jeans short but I changed my mind I put on my teal sundress with yellow cherry blossoms, dusty pink sandals, and my light pink hair scarf I did wrap the hair scarf in a low bun it me took a minute to get right as I was getting dressed my nails were getting mess up so I just used nail polish remover to wipe off the polish cause baby I'm not going out with messes up nails. So I grab my purse, and other belongings and headed to the car. As soon as I open her car door it smelled like popeye's shrimp which me made hungry. Our dad calls on her phone I couldn't hear what they were talking about because she was staying outside of her car. We were driving she tells me we need to make a stop before our next stop I said ok. We stopped at Popeye's I said "we are getting some lunch for dad" and she said, "no girl it is for us". As we are walking in she said "look there's dad" I was surprised I was like "now you could have told that dad was here." We ate lunch with our dad it was nice then we drove some more and I just vibing in the car.

The thing is I had no idea where we were going I asked her "where we are going," and she shrugged her shoulders I was like ok, and continue to vibe to the music.(I trust my sister 1000% with my life) as we were driving I see road signs leading to the beach and it is still not clicking in my brain that we were going to my favorite beach. We pulled up to the beach and I got immediately happy.

(sidenote I haven't been to the beach in 10 years due to my wound in previous years or I would go but my foot needed to be completely wrapped and I would wear jeans because I was so insured about my feet. I felt like everyone was starring and looking at me walk; I do walk with a very noticeable limp and I'm still insured but I'm trying my best to feel comfortable in my skin again and cancel out the insured voice in my head)

Now, my sister had planned of taking me to the beach since last week and my parents knew about this plan and said nothing to me!!

Anyways we are walking up the pier towards the beach and I feel this rush of nervousness, fear, just pure scared. My sister went ahead of me and caught the moment I stepped on the sand for the first time in years all on video. She said " Tee you ready" I was like "no I'm nervous" and as I stepped out on the sand I felt this sense of happiness, and peace and I started to cry it was an automatic reaction like my body was saying this is the moment we have been waiting for.

The sand was hot but so amazing putting the sand over my feet as I dug deeper and deeper into the sand. My sister facetimed our parents to ask if I can go stand in the water they both said "yes". I just wish all of us could have been there because I know pain and trauma happened to me but my mom was doing all of the wound care like cleaning and dressing, my dad took me to all of the wound care treatments, and my sister stood by my side. I looked at her with the biggest smile on my face as we are walking toward the water my mind was racing and my heart was going 1000 beats per second I didn't know if the water was going to be cold, warm, or hot. I got to the edge of the water squeezing my sister's hand as water rushed to the shoreline hitting my feet I started to cry again because it was so cold and just lovely. Our parents were still on facetime watching this experience happen. At that moment I felt like the world was silent and God had me in his arms. We got to the beach around 2:50 we left at 3:15 I truly did not want to leave but we had to.

Like I know I did it feeling the sand and water between my toes for the first time in 10 years barefoot but it is still processing in my head I just did that. I wish precious moments like those had a replay button cause I would replay this moment forever.

I just had to write this in my blog and tell you guys. So until next time write soon...

Love TB

[royaltee98]

January 17,2022

Title:It’s has been a while

My mom and sister had C-19 which was hell being isolated and being in my room away from them for 3 weeks just staring at my wall day in and day out I was losing my mind, I felt so bad for my dad who was taking care of them. The only I was able to communicate with my mom and sister was through my window on facetime. After they got better and restored their strength. I had a terrible sickle crisis last year it is so bad I was transferred to the Intensive Care Unit a.k.a ICU which was the scariest that in my lifetime (Read "The worst sickle Cell crisis" I posted). After I was discharged everything was good and dandy getting back my feet a month later on my birthday November 17 my family received some really horrible news that my big brother aka my cousin had a heart attack and passed away.

I can’t hold my emotions and was in such disbelief everything was hurting I felt so empty, lost, and numb still feel lost for words. My birthday night was and will always be a night I would never ever forget. I really tried to celebrate just the mood and vibe weren’t the same. I went into the bathroom took my makeup off and just cried all night.

We drove to Washington for his funeral there were so many thoughts going through my mind 1. I couldn't go into a crisis up there because I didn't want to be admitted into a hospital that I had never been to before and 2. What do I say when I pass his casket. I have seen my entire family hurt before when my auntie died but this hurt was on another level. I felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest and was thrown into a meat grinder when I said my last goodbyes. I still struggle with his and auntie's passing. There was some really great news my wound finally closed after 13 years, after so many treatments, after being in a Hybarberic oxygen chamber 3 times, and physical therapy, and so many different doctors and nurses there has been so much being thrown to my family and me in those 13 years. My sister got her very first car on her birthday our parents surprised both of us mainly her but I was super happy for her and also she into her dream college.

Now (June 13. 2022) things have been really good for my family and me. We are getting my sister ready to off to college I'm going to her so much but we have facetime, text, anytime I miss her I can just visit her so not all that bad, My art grin has really been on 10 last week I signed up for a free live stream that was a week-long filled with 40+ artists, giveaways, prizes, live chat, meet the artist and dance parties. My health is been really good. We are just enjoying life. So until next time write soon...

Love TB ❤️

[royaltee98]

Betty White and a bear stop what you’re doing and reblog

Betty White: First Lady of Television (Netflix)

[royaltee98]

Today for the first time I made fresh guacamole I’m so proud of myself🤗🤗.

Ingredients:

4 avocados 🥑 ,Juice of 1 lime, ½ of a small onion* I used a purple onion , 3 tbsp Fresh cilantro, 2 Garlic cloves (minced), Roma tomatoes 🍅 * I used a regular tomato, jalapeño peppers 🌶, ½ tsp salt 🧂.

Direction:

Smash the avocado 🥑 , squeeze the lime into guacamole , diced the onion,tomato, jalapeños,cilantro, and the garlic. Then taste to see you need more or less ingredients after that put the salt. Enjoy 😁

3.10.19

Love T. B. ♥️

[royaltee98]

The worst sickle cell crisis

September 25-October 3.2021

Saturday September 25.2021

This was Sunday 2:00 in the morning mom just finished changing my foot and I was watching the golden girls.I fell asleep for a few minutes feeling this awful pain in my lower back I called my dad to tell him that I was having pain and to tell mom but instead I called her. She came over and laid with me rubbing my back and gave me some Motrin, until the next morning…. to be continued

Sunday September 26.2021

This was Saturday afternoon I told my dad I was going to shower while in the shower I wasn’t feeling so good I had to rush and wrap myself in a towel and go sat under the ac because I was feeling very tired and shaking. My mom came in my room and said I didn’t so good, still in awful pain I had a nail appointment that I made last week so I went with mom feeling ok, it took like 30 minutes to do. I got back in the car feeling very tired again, I walked into my house put my stuff down I crawled into bed and continued to watched golden girls I fell asleep again and mom was still rubbing my back. I just couldn’t get comfortable I was moving all my bed.

My mom said do you want to go hospital I immediately said yes it was so hard to get dress my mom helped me while getting the hospital bag ready. I was in so pain it was very difficult to walk so my dad swung me over his shoulders and put me in my mom cars. While driving to the hospital I felt every single stop, bump, and turn in the road. I was crying”. I need relief, I need fast” for me to say that means the pain was sky high. Couldn’t get comfortable always turning and sitting still was so hard in the car.

I got to the emergency room at this point the pain was beyond a 10 more like 10,000 I felt like drawing out of my skin and curling up into a ball until the pain was 100% gone. Once I got in the back and the nurses started an IV for fluids I got strong *pain medication. I would sleep for 10 minutes and right back up balling crying, turning, asking for more relief.

I was being transferred to the 3 floor which was orthopedic floor with a clean hospital bed. I was going in and out of pain in between trying to sleep to the prior medication I was given back at home. My mom was always rubbing my back, hips, and legs. Getting up to use the restroom felt like my legs were set on fire and about to break at any moment. I spent that night and half the that next morning in so much pain and agony.

Monday September 27. 2021

It was the next morning still in was much pain. I did a chest X-ray and take and *nebulizer breathing treatment. This sweet nurse told my mom and I, I needed to be *I.C.U because my oxygen level was at a 45 and had pneumonia, no one on this planet earth should be at a 45. SIDE-NOTE: I cried but I remember when my auntie I wasn’t allowed in the ICU to say my goodbyes because I was to young I was 14 when she pass away from cancer. My body was asking for help and I was transferred to the I.C.U. Once I got into the ICU the nurses put me on the this *high flow oxygen machine. It felt like I was growing in my air the oxygen was going so fast up my nose and the taste was horrible.

I really didn’t have an appetite but I knew I eat something so I won’t have another on my hands. I took a few bites for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Still coughing, in an *active sickle cell crisis , pain was going on. I was in misery I just wanted home to see my sister.

Tuesday September 28. 2021

This morning I did so much such as go get a *CAT scan, do a *echocardiography and I need to use the restroom today. The nurse get a wheelchair for me, it felt so good to come out of ICU. I did a CAT scan before so I was use to it. I got to my room I made a thumbs up gesture to my mom. A few hours went then the echocardiogram technician came to my room, I was pretty nosey she allowed me to look. I asked questions because I was curious the way my heart sounded when she put on the audio gave me more power to fight my way out of the ICU.

The pain management doctor came to ask how is my pain and have went yet. I said my pain is ok and no I haven’t went he said ok and said that he would make a medical mixture for me. I was ok with that.

For rest of the day doctors and different labs techincan came in my room.

Wednesday September 29. 2021

I sat up the chair cause the bed was staring to get uncomfortable and by this time I haven’t went to bathroom and it was kind of getting painful by I still needed eat still taking a few bites of breakfast and I said to my mom that my stomach was hurting. In the ICU there is a little separator dividing the room in the corner was a toilet. ⚠️ TMI ⚠️ Ever since I was born I suffered and still suffer from constipation. That morning I took the mixture pill with my other medication. Let me tell you when I sat on that toilet it was like WW3 I could destroy the whole of Afghanistan the smell that came out my body could have taken me out. It went on for some time back to back ever for the next few days.

After I went I was so hungry any time a nurse came in and ask me if I wanted anything I said yes I usually got ginger ale and chocolate pudding, I love me some snack pack chocolate pudding.

I want to shoutout to my mom because I had so many wires on me, she did everything for me if you know what I mean 😉

Every hour my nurse came to check on me and my mom and ever 4 hours to me my iv medication and if I needed any pain medication. I started to wean off the pain medication because I didn’t want to get addicted to them but if I needed I would ask politely.

I had to sleep on my left side because I had the pneumonia was in my right lung. So I facing the door to my room I prayed to God basically saying: Dear God, please heal my lung so I can get out of ICU and to be able to see my sister and dad. I know that you can do it I believe in you.

Thursday September 30. 2021

Still in the ICU feeling much still can’t take a deep breath but I was working on the *breathing spirometer that is mess felt like hell. More doctors came in to update me and my mom, they said I looked perfectly fine but my CAT scan and X-ray was showing that I had fluid overload, a small amount of fluid around of heart, and pneumonia.

In my head I was like I need to get out of here. Still working on the breathing barometer trying to cleat my lung coughing like a maniac and sitting up off my lungs.

That night the new season of station 19 and grey anatomy came on so my mom and I watched while I ate my hospital dinner and mom had her dinner. After that I FaceTime my sister as I did ever night in hospital saying goodnight and making jokes I say goodnight and can’t wait to get home to her.

Ever other night my mom changes my wound I had of 10 years now; she was coming to the end of wrapping the rolled gauze around my foot. Around the same time the I got a new night shift nurse she would so sweet and her charge nurse pass her a piece of paper. She read it and wrote on my room board 2258 and said that I was switching floors. At that moment I knew God heard my prayer for the night before I was so excited that I was moving rooms.

My mom stared to packed our belongs and checking the room to see if we had left anything in the cabinet.

Friday October 1 2021

It was barley 1:00 in the morning on our way to the new floor. This floor was called *PCU entering our new room 2258 where we spent the next three days in. I told my mom one day closer to seeing my sister; the nurses slid me over to my new bed which was super uncomfortable. Now on this new floor between 12 and 4 they you sleep which was very comforting to hear.

I really didn’t sleep cause cause there was lab technicians taking my blood and nurses taking vitals sign. Once the sun came up my mom and I started to get up. I had such an appetite I ate all of my breakfast and was still hungry but my mom kept a sash of little snack from previous breakfast, Lunch, and dinner trays that I didn’t eat prior to being backed up so I had my favorite combo ginger ale and snack pack chocolate pudding.

The same doctor from the ICU came up was updated my mom and I still looked fine on the outside but the inside was still acting up. After they left I did so research why are keeping it is because I had a low grade fever due to pneumonia that’s all.

The physical therapist came in to work with me and my limp due to the wound I had and still have for 10 years. I walked the entire PCU floor, basic excise like in and out kicks, stepping in place, hip opener, and muscle resistance.

The more I felt better the more food was on my hospital food tray that night for dinner I had pasta and meatball with ice tea, and chocolate pudding. For the rest of night my mom and I watched tv and was heading to bed.

Saturday October 2. 2021

That morning my mom and I had a mission I was to freshen up, take my meds, let the nurses give me my Iv antibiotic and we were going for a walk on the PCU floor. After all that I decided to sit up in the chair again. The doctors came in and still I was feeling better but the x-rays were getting clearer still had pneumonia but I since couching and using my breathing barometer is was getting better. They wanted to still keep me over night to watch me for any fever spikes.

The fever spikes will only happened at 12:00 in the night so they still concerned about that. Physical therapist came to walked me and this time I didn’t even realized that I walked the over floor I was going my speed like yesterday but it seemed faster.

My dad stopped by to give me some really pretty flowers and to relieve my mom so she can go home and freshen up and checked on to my sister. My dad and I went for a walk and by the time we finished she was on her back to the hospital. She brought Popeyes and we watched the movie Selena I almost cried because I heard how she died by never got to watch it, it was the older one with Jennifer Lopez.

We continue to watch tv as we went to bed.

Sunday October 3 .2021

This was the morning I felt that I was going to be discharged form the hospital and on our way home. For breakfast I had some pancakes and sausage to drink I had some orange juice and the nurse gave me my medication and I was just chilling. The doctors came in by now it was just the fever spikes at night was reason they kept me an extra night. The nurse I had was trying to discharge me I really appreciated that.

Lunch time had just begun at the same time the nurse had came into my room to tell me I had been discharged in mid bite of my pasta and meatball I just felt it I was so happy to see my sister and dad. She said do you want to finish your lunch or just want to be discharge I said I wanted to be discharged so she was took off my heart monitor, pulse oximeter, and the IV I had.

She read me my discharge papers that I had to sign after that she went to go get a wheelchair and my mom went ahead down to get the car. For a moment I was left in the room by myself I turned on some gospel music and was praising God and thanking him for bringing me out of this one.

I told my mom to not to tell my dad I was being discharged cause I wanted to surprise him. He even called me I said the I using the bathroom the truth was I was sitting sign my discharge papers. While being rolled down to the lobby I kept thanking God for all his had done.

Pulling up to my house I got out of the car rang the doorbell and my dad opened the door and was so surprised and my sister was still sleeping so I waited until she had gotten up to tell her that I was in the ICU she just was surprised.

Now it has been four days I been home feeling much better still keeping up on my water intake and taking my temperature, oxygen levels and working on my breathing spirometer. God has and will forever been by my family and I side in times of needs he is just so good, caring, loving, merciful. Thank you God.

*pain medication: Dilaudid: treat moderate to severe pain

*nebulizer: A device for producing a fine spray of liquid, used for example for inhaling a medicinal drug

*I.C.U: a unit in a hospital providing intensive care for critically ill or injured patients that is staffed by specially trained medical personnel and has equipment that allows for continuous monitoring and life support

*high flow oxygen machine: Only offered if traditional oxygen therapy isn't helping, high flow oxygen therapy helps reduce the effort your body needs to put into breathing. By decreasing the effort of breathing and creating a small amount of positive pressure in the upper airways, this therapy helps improve oxygen delivery.

*active sickle cell crisis (in my opinion): is the pain the starts you feel it as the bad cells dies off

*CAT scan: n X-ray image made using a form of tomography in which a computer controls the motion of the X-ray source and detectors, processes the data, and produces the image.

*echocardiogram:a test of the action of the heart using ultrasound waves to produce a visual display, used for the diagnosis or monitoring of heart disease.

*breathing Spirometer:a common office test used to assess how well your lungs work by measuring how much air you inhale, how much you exhale and how quickly you exhale.

*PCU: The Progressive Care Unit or PCU is a telemetry (vital signs) monitored unit that provides care for adult patients requiring continuous cardiac monitoring

Love T.B.❤️

[royaltee98]

Good morning everyone, please take time to read thank you.

I am posting it because I honestly want to educate you on sickle cell. This past 5 week has been truly HELL and back. My family and I had been through literal fire and came out on the other by the grace and love of my God.

This week since Sunday September 26- Sunday October 3 2021, my sickle cell crisis started out so simple as just feeling so tired but prior to that I was sleeping ALOT which is not like me. ⚠️ TMI that is one of my period symptoms but I was sleeping so much.

The pain started in my back like a something was pinching me so I knew what to do to start my home remedy that consist of Motrin, heating pads, and *watching something super funny which was the golden girls.

*distracting yourself with something funny tends to trick the mind and ease the pain

The pain grew more and more intense and was traveling back and forth in my back, hips, and legs. It felt like my skeleton was coming out of my body and set of fire. It was so was difficult to get dress for the hospital my mom helped me while getting the *hospital bag ready.

*medications, medical paperwork, change of clothes, breathing barometer, comfort teddy bear and small activities.

While my mom was driving me to the hospital I felt everything single bump, turn, stop in the road there was. I was crying “I need relief I need relief fast”, couldn’t get comfortable, always turning and it was so hard to sit still. I got to the Emergency Room and at this point the pain was beyond a 10 more like a 10,000 I felt crawling out of my skin and curling up into a ball and just staying there until the pain was 100% gone. Once I got in the back and the nurses started my fluids I got some *pain medication.

*Dilaudid, works fast but doesn’t last

So I would sleep and in 10 minutes be right back up crying and screaming bloody murder in pain asking for more pain relief.

I transferred to floor 3 at this point I was going in and out of pain always sleeping and getting up balling crying for my mom to rubbing my back plus always getting up to use to the bathroom. My legs felt like they were set on fire and about to break at any given moment that how much pain I was in.

I spent that night and half of the next morning in so much agony. Then this super sweet nurse told my mom I needed to be in *I.C.U, because my oxygen was at a 45 no one in this world should be at a 45. So my body was asking for help and I was transferred to ICU. I was so backed up due to all of medication they gave me but eventually I went and I also had pneumonia so dealing with a active crisis and respiratory issues so was hard. This crisis was so bad.

*ICU= intensive care unit, nurses watching over you very carefully.

I stayed for 4 days and was transferred again to *PCU where I stayed for 3 day

*PCU= progressive care unit, it is a step down from ICU. I want to thank all of nurses from ER, ICU, PCU, the housekeeping, dietitians, physical therapist and doctors for nursing my back to health. It will take time to me to regain my strength but I am willing to do whatever it takes.

I say all for this because God wasn’t ready me to come home yet and knowing that my aunt wasn’t ready for me either I can hear her now saying “ Reese I got you 😉 keep on fighting”. I literally fought my way back to my family said prayers, few of my family knew and they always praying and my best friend knew and she was also praying. Sometimes you just have to put on your war clothes and go on head first stand your ground until you see the rainbow on the other side it might be hard see, problem coming towards your from nowhere, might even have crawl but one thing that I know for sure it that God is always there if you believe or not he is ALWAYS AND WILL NEVER EVER EVER leave you, me or everyone astray or forsake you. These are my battle scars that will that time to heal but I made it to the other side with God and my family. Please if you have any comments or questions don’t hesitate to ask I am willing to asking. And to the family who don’t to know please call me and I will explain.

[royaltee98]

Self Love by Lori Saint Rome

[royaltee98]

Small shop update with some new prints and stickers :3

[royaltee98]

shining brighter than the moon, shining brighter than the stars • ☕ •

[royaltee98]

May 29.2021

My family and I watched this movie two nights ago. As sickle cell warrior I felt every scene from missing school to wearing base how cold or hot I am so I won’t have a crisis. Warriors need doctors like the one in the movie, that doctor was to the point and honest.

Living with a chronic condition is never easy it messes with my mental, emotional, and physical health. As warriors we just got to take it one day at a time.

Love T.B.

[royaltee98]

Ever since I started making my own granola this past summer, I’ve almost stopped purchasing boxed cereal entirely. My friend’s mother introduced me to her quick and easy recipe and I’ve since added a few ingredients of my own at the suggestion of this Buzzfeed article. 

I buy raw nuts and seeds so that I can mix everything together and make sure they all get coated in the spice mix. Trader Joe’s has a great selection of inexpensive raw nuts/seeds that come pre-chopped or sliced. It takes about 20 minutes to measure and mix everything and another 40-60 minutes to bake at 300-315 degrees. Flat baking sheets work best so you can spread the mixture out in a thin layer and make sure to stir every 20 minutes or so.

3 cups of plain rolled oats 

1 - 1 ½ cups raw nuts (I like a combo walnuts, almonds, pecans)

1 cup unsweetened coconut flakes

1 cup of raw pumpkin seeds aka pepitas

½ cup raw flax seeds

1 tsp cinnamon

½ tsp ground ginger and nutmeg

½ cup of honey

¼ cup of melted salted butter mixed with ¼ cup olive oil 

1 cup raisins (added after you bake)

Before anyone attacks me for using butter, the debates continue over it’s good/bad properties compared to other oils. I, personally, like the taste component it adds to my granola and if you decide to use butter, read the labels on the kind of butter you buy to make sure it DOES NOT contain trans fats! 

This recipe makes about 7-8 cups of granola so invest in a few airtight containers for storage (my jars are from IKEA). Enjoy as a breakfast cereal with milk, yogurt topping, or midday snack and don’t be afraid to mix it up and try different nut, seed, and dried fruit combos

[royaltee98]

Where to being..... First off let me say a very Happy Birthday Auntie Sheila🥳 . 9 years ago God called you home. In the beginning of your passing I struggle so bad with the thought of you not being here to see my graduation from middle school to high school to college , prom, getting morning calls telling me to “have a great day Reese”. I get random scents, flashbacks and dreams of you when I really really miss you but I know you are without pain. I miss your smile, laughter, and watching endless cooking shows. I hold so many memories of you in my heart but there is this one memory that is so fond: when you came up here (PSL) in 08 to see our first house we sit on the floor playing Mancala and cards. Man words can’t very form how deeply I miss you 😢🥺 one day we will meet again. Keep watch over our Family and please popping up in my mind and dreams that way I can feel close you. I love you so very much and Happy Birthday again Auntie Sheila❤️ ~Love always your Reese 7:33pm April 10.2021 https://www.instagram.com/p/CNgSMUTAyxD/?igshid=3bbqbx42enlr

[royaltee98]

Art by Angela Hao

[royaltee98]

Dear Auntie Sheila, The holiday times are the most difficult without you here. You gain your wings going on 9 years and it still feels like it was yesterday when I heard the words “ baby girl she didn’t make it”, it felt like my world had blown up into a million tint pieces that were unsalvageable. The grieving process it is like a feeling I never in experience in my life I can’t bring myself to fulling weep so I just shoved it down😔 I know that is really bad for mental health. Sometimes I just wish I had just ran threw those ICU door just to see you one last time but my age was the only thing holding me back. You were the bravest person I know kicking cancer behind. Your smile made it seems like there was always better and beautiful days ahead. I miss sitting at your house watching the cooking channel or the price is right. Today I found the small snow globe that you gave us in 2007 I smiled just thinking of you; I still remember where I was staying when you gave it us. I also remember when you,uncle and your kids came up here to our house for thanksgiving, I really didn’t understand how sick you were but you were always there for us the good and bay days. You made the effort to show up no matter what holiday it was. I loved the morning calls before school and evening calls after school it was like you were the mom ( shhh don’t tell mom I said that😆😆). Ugh 😢 I hope you are always with me wherever I go in life. I love when you show up in my dreams it is so comforting and reassuring that everything will be a-ok. Man I how I wish you were still here just to physically catch you up on my accomplishments and the tough thing I have been though but I know for sure that you are always looking down from the beautiful paradise place in heaven talking to God. I love to feel your presence or get a quick smell for you it is a the warmest feeling ever. I love you so much auntie you are always with us in spirit and in memory. Until we meet again beautiful soul❤️❤️ ~ Love Reese December 14,2020

[royaltee98]

November 17.2020

It is my 22 birthday and so far I have been relaxing to the max and watching my favorite shows. It is lunch time 1:23 I am eating Chinese food and drinking a sprite while watching Station 19. Then I took a nap for an hour and when I woke up my parents and sister threw me a party we had crab, shrimp, salad and sparkling cider 🥂. It was a really birthday 🥳.

Love T.B. 💛