rptabloid

[rptabloid]

hey there! the age gap anon reminded me of something i sent to that confessrpc blog that's inactive now but i never got any feedback that i saw to help after they posted my ask. so i'm hoping it's okay if i ask it here and get some feedback?? just gonna copy/paste the same message i had sent so it's a little messy and rambly but hope it's readable!:

i have issues with figuring out exactly what i should do sometimes when determining what the best fc age:muse age ratio should be. when i first started roleplaying, first i'll admit that i was in groups that allowed for some muses that were minor ages and played 16-18 year old high schoolers. i was in my early 20s and struggle still with getting older so at the time i think i was just using that as a way to try and re-live my high school years. but the point is, i remember back then when it became an issue of people using 25+ cw fcs to play teenagers, which of course makes sense people shouldn't have been using paul wesley to play a 17 year old high schooler (shouldn't play minors in general obviously again want to state i know that's wrong now and haven't played a character as a minor in at least 10 years) and eventually it turned to the whole using a +/- rule whether it was +2/-2 or +5/-5 and then it's become a world where gif makers explicitly state they don't support that rule which is fine, but what confuses me is you ask an rph for fc suggestions and give an age range, sometimes they give fcs that are younger than the age range, older i can understand more i guess? i just basically don't know what the best way to determine the ages i should be looking for when i know exactly how old i want my muse to be?

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[rptabloid]

are the tags messed up again? like they were messed up then it seemed they were fixed now it seems like they're not working again?? and last time i used findtags that wasn't working anymore either so idk what to dooooo

rip findrps i miss you so much

[rptabloid]

do people still do self-paras? is that still a thing? lol i enjoyed those

i haven’t seen a self para in ages i loved them too! i feel like if they were brought back it would really help with keeping muse

[rptabloid]

how can someone be triggered by the idea of an age gap relationship? im genuinely curious //// there’s a lot of people that were groomed by older people or may have other situations where they were abused by someone older than them in a relationship. seeing romantic relationships that mirror that dynamic can be triggering, especially in rp where everyone is a little nuts and don’t execute sensitive topics well lmao. there’s also just like… certain people on here that take age gap relationships and RUN with it. like full on making their muses the youngest legally possible and then making them behave like they’re in middle school, then shipping them with someone in their 40s. it’s very much meant to mimic exactly what you’re thinking.

super true

[rptabloid]

re: tagging age gaps, if ur in a group i think best course of action is to check the rules and if it’s not covered, confirm with the admins. there are obvious things that should be covered but you don’t want to assume where the line is. once i was in a group and in my character’s backstory, there was one line that mentioned her mother being younger than her father (no specifics - just a brief single sentence) and the admins were NOT happy that i did tw mentions of an age gap. some people might have lines you would t even really think about.

i’m dead simply that they were upset before asking for further clarification

[rptabloid]

how can someone be triggered by the idea of an age gap relationship? im genuinely curious

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[rptabloid]

when it comes to age gap i think it changes from person to person. i’d tag as triggering any age gap that’s under 25, and especially if it’s under 21+ and with more than 5 years between the muses, but i myself wouldn’t bat an eye if both muses are 30+ and have huge age gaps. in general i think people would be trigged by 10+ years when muses are 30+ tho. but like i said, changes from person to person.

absolutely is subjective. like 19-25 to me personally is not triggering. 19 and a 27/28 year old? yeah that one is a bit odd. but then you get a 27 year old and 36 year old and that is not as triggering for me. idk if someone is 30 and dating someone’s who’s 40 i wouldn’t bat an eye

[rptabloid]

oh yes i don’t think 30 and 45 is a typical age gap, but i brought i up because generally it seems the rule online is that once you’re 25 you’re free to date older than you without it being considered highly inappropriate unless the older person is like your boss or an actual senior citizen. from what i gather, some have rules that say age gaps can be anything with 25+ muses but with muses under 25 it can be 5-8 years max before it’s considered taboo. but i’ve seen some people side eye fictional relationships between 21 and 28, 19 and 25, etc. to me, anything with a teenager is weird but not if it’s like a 19 and 22 year old? but i can’t tell where the line is being made in general. part of my confusion is that i’m relatively young myself so my idea of older/younger is different than 30 year old writers, iykwim?

i was saying 30-45 is a pretty normal age gap but one thing that’s for sure before i post the rest of my anons is that age gaps and what is considered triggering is 100% subjective

[rptabloid]

re: oversharing in the ooc chats // i’m not a huge fan of when people overshare either, especially when it gets into potentially triggering topics (i hate when servers have vent channels and things like that…) but on the admin side it is nice to know what to expect from my members activity-wise? i don’t think you need to get into why your activity is currently slow if you don’t want to, but a quick heads up of hey my activity might be spotty for a bit never goes amiss. but we really don’t need more details than that!

seems like it should be taken to a vote at the start of the server

[rptabloid]

can admins weigh in? // i’m an admin!! in our discord we have a ‘writings updates’ channel where people can post there about anything to do with why they’ve not been on or when they’re going to get on. we also have a ‘vent’ channel for serious topics which we ask are mostly put under spoilers. honestly, i never need to know details of why someone has been a bit awol especially if you don’t want to share but i also care a lot and would want to support you if something is going on in your life aka need a hiatus or something! but tbh as long as someone hits activity it’s fine for me! i do think the group ive built is super comfortable and open with each other so we mostly always share stuff anyway, even just ‘has a hard few days bc of mental health’. but the choice is always members to share! my two cents <3

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[rptabloid]

for age gap anon: i've seen most rps say 10+ years is to be trigger warned

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[rptabloid]

a while ago there was discussion about oversharing in the ooc chat, can admins weigh in?

an admin here. i'm not big on general oversharing of personal lives in the ooc because i'm also a private person and frankly i'm in this group to rp. i save the more personal details about myself for the rp partners that i've known for years and at this point consider friends. everyone's different, of course, but i see no reason to update the group like you would in a corporate teams group chat about your availability. this is a hobby; it's something we all get to in our free times when we have the energy. i don't believe in apologizing for not being around but then again the group i run is very respectful of everyone's personal lives taking priority (not every group may be like this).

that said, from my opinion, if there is something keeping a player away indefinitely from doing replies, i'm the admin that asks for a private update that'll stay between the player and myself. the whole group may not need to know what's going on. i don't need to know the full details but i like at least a head's up if someone needs a hiatus from the group. longer periods of time (say over a month or two) away i may ask for a little more info to understand why so much hiatus time is necessary.

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[rptabloid]

to the anon asking/resurfacing the convo about oversharing, telling people you have irl stuff things are fine to let them know where you’re at. but oversharing to me is like… sharing pictures of kids/nieces, posting selfies, how buzzed/high you are, talking about your sex life, snippets from therapy, etc. there’s just a fine line in general. talking about how difficult work is is fine, complaining about your boss and fishing for sympathy is somewhat pushing it, and sharing workplace drama/gossip is definitely over the line. but it depends on the group really! i’ve just been in groups where people share too much information and it gets uncomfortable super quick because we were just talking about fun muse stuff and someone came into ooc drunk and started telling us about their dad abandoning them

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[rptabloid]

i, personally, think a relationship with a 19 year old and a 25 year old needs to be triggered. while numerically the ages are not far apart, mentally the muses would be in two different places. for some, a 25 year old dating a 19 year old, regardless of gender, would be seen as preyful (a 19-year-old still has 'teen' in their age ). i generally don't rp in spaces that are not 21+ muses for starters, and i use the age gap of 5 years for muses between 21-25 and 26+, it is whatever. i hope that makes sense !

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[rptabloid]

can you put this in the rpc and rpt tag?

what is the age gap that needs to be tagged as a trigger? is there like a generally accepted number that’s like… if it exceeds x amount of years, then it needs to be tagged? or is it based on the actual ages of the muses? for example, obviously a 19 year old and 40 year old would be off putting to most people and that’s obvious to tag. but what about a 19 and 25 year old? or a 30 and 45 year old? is it still considered triggering once the younger muse is over 25? is it still considered triggering if the older muse is under 35? someone tell me pls

personally with the last two age examples i don’t think that’s considered an age gap that’s normal for adults

[rptabloid]

a while ago there was discussion about oversharing in the ooc chat, can admins weigh in? ooc chats are created (usually on discord) by them, usually for chit chat. Im a private person in general so i dont participate in them, but i do want to get admin opinions. If they prefer the updates (for example "sorry i havent been on i've been sick/work is a lot/visited family") to muns who stay silent? I always worry that because I don't share whats going on irl, it might seen like im not as committed to the group. Recently i went through a break up that had my activity suffering. I didn't share ooc but i wonder if it was a bad look the admins to just post ic once or twice every four days.

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[rptabloid]

about using influencers as fcs, there are accounts on instagram that dm influencers to ask if they consent to being used for rps or not! @rpmodel4u and @insposhape! i highly recommend everyone to peruse these accounts. some noteworthy people who have pressed not wanting to be used as fcs to these accounts are manon bannerman (meret manon), aron piper, and more!

there ya go!