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[runawaytaurus]

i need to (remembers that suicide jokes only hurt yourself and those around you) fag it up

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[runawaytaurus]

Thoughts on Unicorn Wars

(spoilers ahead) When I first watched the trailer I thought that this felt like a sketch from Rick and Morty: take something considered wholesome, infantile and (depending your definition) feminine and combine it with something considered hypermasculine: the army. Fortunately I knew this was not going to be their take on it because the director is Alberto Vázquez, from Birdboy/Psychonauts; and his style is what I would call “children’s apocalypse”.

I think this movie would have been extremely tiring if it was done with the post-irony humour of Rick and Morty and honestly one of the things I love about it is that it is not. The movie does its take on this subject completely straight and while there is some humour on the characters having names like Sgt. Snuggles; you quickly get caught up in the emotional army drama that is the central plot. 

One of the things I enjoyed early on is that this movie was giving us a view of what would toxic masculinity look like in a world that’s obviously inspired by Care Bears and early MLP: what we get is men fighting over who looks cuddlier and huggable, combined with very physical fights and their results. 

When I say that that the movie takes it subject matter seriously, that does not mean it glorifies the army or being in the armed forces: quite the opposite. This movie is extremely cynical about what being a soldier means. Our main character Bluey is a soldier because he selfishly wants to be “the best” at everything; the other soldiers don’t know what they’re getting into and their motivation is a “holy war” that is deconstructed from the first scene. Even their immediate superiors have no idea what they’re fighting against: we see their sargeant fall apart mentally much quicker than the new recruits (and it’s implied that it’s not because he’s seen this too many times, rather that he is seeing it for the first time). The guys at the top of the army know what’s going on and reveal to audience that there’s no reason to keep this holy war going except to keep themselves in power. There’s nearly a verbatim line that the people need an enemy to hate or they’ll notice how fucked up the power structure in their society is. 

Fascinatingly, for a movie that’s so so cynical about the army and using religion as a vehicle for genocide, the soldier chaplain is never presented as a corrupt character. He believes the holy war motivation as much as the other soldiers (perhaps even more so), but there’s a quiet self confidence he has that we don’t see in any other character. He is capable and self assured at all times; which is highlighted when other soldiers are falling apart emotionally around him. Interestingly we don’t see him trying to incite hatred against unicorns among the other soldiers too often, he’s more preoccupied in supporting them morally and spiritually. He even ends up committing suicide with a grenade to kill a group of unicorns and save his fellows. It’s fascinating because he experiences zero character growth in this time in the movie: he lives and he dies being completely convinced that this is the right course of action. Nothing about him was fake, even though as the audience we know that the reason for war is false. 

I would argue that his role is taken over by Bluey in the latter half of the movie: someone who is completely convinced that this holy war is correct and necessary and will stop at nothing to see it through. What makes Bluey a terrifying villain is that he’s now finally someone with the power and resources to actually accomplish the unicorn genocide. 

Major spoilers for the ending below!

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[runawaytaurus]

[runawaytaurus]

[runawaytaurus]

 nourishes it

keeps it warm

fills it with love

fills it with rice

refills sanity bar

grants it a blessing

[runawaytaurus]

I’m not going to explain myself

[runawaytaurus]

hold on. Was suck him good and hard through his jorts supposed to conjour the image of someone who has an unzipped fly because this entire time I've been imagining someone slurping on wet denim

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anyone else afraid worried concerned anxious freaked out etc etc

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god created man to be penetrated

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give that girl a grilled cheese

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badweird feelings

[runawaytaurus]

Hundreds of Jewish anti-war demonstrators have been arrested during a Passover seder that doubled as a protest in New York, as they shut down a major thoroughfare to pray for a ceasefire and urge the Senate majority leader, Chuck Schumer, to end US military aid to Israel.

The 300 or so arrests took place on Tuesday night at Grand Army Plaza, on the doorstep of Schumer’s Brooklyn residence, where thousands of mostly Jewish New Yorkers gathered for the seder, a ritual that marked the second night of the holiday celebrated as a festival of freedom by Jews worldwide.

The seder came just before the US Senate resoundingly passed a military package that includes $26bn for Israel.

[runawaytaurus]

sometimes im like "wow holy shit im being really fucking annoying. i should stop talking" and then i pull out my magic 8 ball and it says "youve always been annoying and your friends chose to talk you anyways. youll be fine" and im like wow thanks magic 8 ball. and then the ogre attacks me

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chilchuck moment

[runawaytaurus]

i don't know man, i just wish that we could [suddenly realising i'm coming dangerously close to expressing a real and earnest thought instead of filtering everything through several layers of intangible running bits] blow up the entire world. or something.