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Eartha Kitt, c.1958

“My recipe for life is not being afraid of myself, afraid of what I think or of my opinions.”

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* caspers·!

𝙻𝙸𝚂𝚃𝙴𝙽 𝚃𝙾 𝚂𝙾𝙼𝙴 𝚃𝚄𝙽𝙴𝚂.      he   wishes   that   were   the   case.    wishes   it   were   that   simple.    faint   smile   runs   across   mouth,   humoring   the   lighthearted   attempt   at   levity.   as   the   phone   rings,   the   radio   shuts   off,   the   flickering   overhead   lights   casting   a   deep   shadow   throughout   the   room.    raindrops   still   continue   to   pelt   the   window,   and   as   casper   picks   up   the   receiver,   his   eyes   close   briefly,   but   tight.    𝙳𝙾 𝙸𝚃 𝙽𝙾𝚆.    with   a   shaky   breath,   he   places   the   receiver   to   his   ear,   and   it   begins.   no   notes   are   taken,   no   words   from   his   mouth   are   uttered.    casper’s   eyes   flick   to   meet   letitia’s,   and   he   stares   at   her   for   a   moment   before   shifting   his   gaze   forward.    his   face   is   tight   with   discomfort,   as   if   what   he's   hearing   is   unpleasant.    brows   contract,   casper’s   chest   rising   and   falling   as   the   call   continues.   on   the   other   end,   the   spirits   speak,   naming   their   intentions.   𝙰𝙻𝙻 𝙼𝙰𝙻𝙸𝙲𝙴.    the   specifics,   the   details      ——————     casper   struggles   to   keep   them   locked   inside   of   his   mind,   the   way   the   words   keep   flowing   through   his   ears.    when   it   finally   ends,   he   lowers   the   receiver,   nursing   it   to   his   chest.   whatever   he   has   heard   resonates,   and   he   glances   up   at   letitia   again,   shaking   his   head   once,   gently,   before   lowering   the   receiver   back   onto   the   body   of   the   phone.   ❛❛     you   should   sit,      ❜❜   a   nod   with   his   chin,   and   he   pushes   his  glasses   back   up   his   nose.    he's   unsure   if   letitia   will,   if   she’ll   even   pick   up   the   hotline   when   it   rings,   as   he   knows   the   trust   between   them   is   as   thin   as   a   thread.   he   decides   to   continue   anyway.   ❛❛     what   you’re   going   to   hear   might   be   a   little     …     strange.     ❜❜   𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚅𝙾𝙸𝙲𝙴𝚂 𝙾𝙵 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙳𝙴𝙰𝙳.    casper's   hands   are   clasped   together,   resting   on   the   surface   of   the   table.   ❛❛      we   cannot   discuss   it   until   you’ve   listened,   but   then   we   can   devise   a   plan.   this   job   requires   us   to.     ❜❜   the   equipment   beeps   softly   and   he   lowers   his   head,   checking   the   results.    ❛❛      it   will   probably   ring   soon,   and   it   will   be   your   conversation   to   have.    listen   carefully,   and   try   to   remember   as   much   as   you   can.      ❜❜    the   room   is   still   dark,   the   only   light   the   gray   and   endless   clouds   from   outside.    the   radio   is   silent,   not   even   a   wisp   of   static   to   be   heard.   it’s   off   -   putting,   just   how   much   the   quiet   can   weigh.   it   presses   against   casper’s   chest   as   if   his   lungs   are   filling   with   it,   as   if   he's   suffocating.   he   pulls   at   his   collar,   anxious   with   ideas.    if   letitia   hears   anything   close   to   what   he   has      ——————     his   heart   beats   faster   and   faster.   the   spirits   are   legion,   each   one   talking   over   another   to   describe   the   hate   they   would   like   to   spread,   and   casper's   ears   are   still   ringing   with   it.   there   is   a   bizarre   juxtaposition   between   the   whispering   he’s   heard,   the   angry   mob   of   strengthening   ghosts,   in   comparison   to   how   calm   he   is.    or,   rather,   how   calm   he   seems   to   be.   𝙱𝚄𝚁𝙴𝙰𝚄 𝙴𝙼𝙿𝙻𝙾𝚈𝙴𝙴𝚂 𝙵𝙴𝙴𝙻 𝙽𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙸𝙽𝙶.    casper   purses   his   lips,   staring   down   at   the   phone   and   waiting,   and   after   a   few   seconds,   it   begins   to   ring   once   more.    ❛❛      i   believe   it’s   your   turn   now,      ❜❜    with   a   frown,   he   tilts   his   head   toward   the   hotline.    𝙱𝙴 𝙲𝙰𝚁𝙴𝙵𝚄𝙻.

A WIND PICKED UP!    light,   enough to keep leti’s cheeks a bit cold and blush them up to a deeper shade of burnt red.     she watched with a parted mouth,   always on the verge of saying something and ready to put up a fight.    but, despite her disposition of intensity,   she remained still.     silent,   with her hands on the edge of the table and her chin resting on the wood.   she remained squatted down,    watching with child-like fear.     INHALE  ------  she should be used to this by now.    but red tipped nails tapped along with the static.  she tried to listen.    ❛❛  what are they sayin’ to you?    ❜❜    

leti knew he wouldn’t answer, but she asked the question anyway.   THAT THIN. TRUST----    it was shaking like an earthquake.     it was enough in his eyes,   and his strength he pretended to have that pushed her eyebrows together in worry.     slowly she rose,    palms pressed against the table as she felt it shake under her.      SHE DIDN’T SIT.    she stood with shoulders tense as she looked at the phone.      BBBRR-RIIING!!!      it was now or never.   with a lift of her eyebrow,   and a curse to her mouth,    she reached down and picked it up and jerked it to her face in an almost robotic movement. 

both hands clutched the phone,     holding it against her cheek.   a loud scream filled the phone,   straight in her ear.    SHE WINCED,   and the instinct to pull it away from her ear almost got her.    but she shook it out of her face,   and leti knew she had to listen.    THE WINCE DIDN’T LEAVE HER FACE.    it was glued to her features,   distorting her features as she heard the whispered or screams.    TERRIBLE ! TERRIBLE !  TERRIBLE !      as soon as it was over,  she slammed the receiver down, missing twice before it finally silenced it. 

❛❛  This is fucked up.   ❜❜      her voice gained back the bite,    as she pointed at the phone as she shook her head.    ❛❛  YOU KNOW THAT WE CAN’T DO THIS,  WHAT IT’S ASKIN’.   ❜❜    

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i love leti!!!!

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you know what, Satan? we’re gonna tear your kingdom down

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Jurnee Smollett in One Last Thing (2018)

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*unforgive​!

𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐒 𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐍 𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐈𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐋𝐊𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐒 𝐀𝐓 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓. the  unknown  nightmares  that  linger  just  beyond  the  veil,  hunting  them  like  wild  animals.   fear  does  not  find  a  home  in  his  beating  heart,  instead  the  strings  of  fate  pull  him  towards  the  danger,  wandering  towards  the  call  of  a  siren.   the  entity  inside  of  him  longs  to  climb  out  of  his  ribcage,  claws  sharp  like  blades,  mouth  full  of  teeth,  ready  to  devour.   she  moves  to  push  him  to  safety,  but  the  deputy  is  like  a  moth  to  a  flame,  magnetized  and  mesmerized.

𝐃𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓? 𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐄 𝐍𝐎𝐓?     the  call  is  ancient,  older  than  the  concept  of  time,  older  than  than  this  reality.   what  was  once  a  horrific  scream  turns  to  a  familiar  song,  nostalgic  in  nature,  reminiscent  of  times  long  passed.          𝑶𝑵𝑳𝒀 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑪𝑨𝑵 𝑴𝑨𝑲𝑬 𝑻𝑯𝑰𝑺 𝑾𝑶𝑹𝑳𝑫 𝑺𝑬𝑬𝑴 𝑹𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻, 𝑶𝑵𝑳𝒀 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑪𝑨𝑵 𝑴𝑨𝑲𝑬 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑫𝑨𝑹𝑲𝑵𝑬𝑺𝑺 𝑩𝑹𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻, 𝑶𝑵𝑳𝒀 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑨𝑵𝑫 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑨𝑳𝑶𝑵𝑬 𝑪𝑨𝑵 𝑻𝑯𝑹𝑰𝑳𝑳 𝑴𝑬 𝑳𝑰𝑲𝑬 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑫𝑶 𝑨𝑵𝑫 𝑭𝑰𝑳𝑳 𝑴𝒀 𝑯𝑬𝑨𝑹𝑻 𝑾𝑰𝑻𝑯 𝑳𝑶𝑽𝑬 𝑭𝑶𝑹 𝑶𝑵𝑳𝒀 𝒀𝑶𝑼.     there’s  a  gun  in  his  hand,  some  minuscule  weapon  against  whatever  is  in  the  darkness,  ineffective  beyond comprehension,  but  a  false  sense  of  security,  regardless.

“     SOUNDS  LIKE  A  SONG.     ”          his  comment  is  late,  drawn  out  over  what  feels  like a  century,  but  monotone  in  comparison  to  all  that  had  come  before.   the  weight  of  his  body  is  the  only  thing  that  feels  real,  and  perhaps  the  lingering  warmth  upon  his  chest  where  her  hand  once  lay.   graham’s  body  moves  against  his  will,  while  his  mind  becomes  trapped  in  the  confusion  of  the  moment.          “     it’s  coming  from  over  here,  leti.   it’s  coming   —     ”     and  he’s  gone.   disappeared  without  a  trace.

 ❛❛  A SONG?  ARE YOU CRAZY?   ❜❜      to her it was a rattle,   guttural and low inside of her ribcage.   it shook her knees and squeezed her bones.    her eyes looked up at the man,    and she tried to reconcile the look in his eyes.  this whole thing only put her on a higher alert,   and her fingers squeezed against the fabric as she continued to push him back.    IT WAS A WAVE CRASH—————    like the tension was going to swallow them under the ocean.    and it too loud for her to think.   shaking her head,   leti did her best to focus on getting out,  getting safe,  getting away.    ALWAYS TRYING TO GET SOMEWHERE / but she wasn’t getting anywhere like this. 

she waited for a reply  /  but it never came.    she waited baited,  nervous and shaking as she looked up at him.  nails dragged to his cheek, trying to scratch him awake with desperation.   THIS WAS WRONG !   and why couldn’t he see that?    ❛❛ THEN WE GOTTA GO !    ❜❜  

as soon as she said it, her body feel forward.  she lost her footing,   stumbling as she hit the concrete hard.   palms slid and bloodied, and she hissed in pain.   and her was gone,  and her head shot up to look around her.  she opened her mouth to scream but nothing came out,   rolling on her back,  she kicked herself up pulling knees to her chest  WITH HER EYES JERKING FRANTICALLY! 

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* caspers!

𝙰 𝙻𝙸𝚃𝚃𝙻𝙴 𝙱𝙸𝚃 𝙾𝙵 𝙸𝚃 𝙰𝙻𝙻.      he   blinks   behind   frames,   opening   his   mouth   to   reply:   tell   me   about   that.   he   doesn’t   get   the   chance;   the   lamp   turns   on,   bright   and   cutting   through   the   semi   -   darkness.   gaze   set   upon   it,   brows   contracting,   confusion   crossing   the   the   usual   curious   expression   of   casper’s   face.   the   sound   resonates,   not   quite   an   exhausted   crack,   but   more   of   an   ear   -   splitting,  high   -   pitched   whine   of  warning.    the   glass   then   flies,   and   casper   juts   his   chin   to   the   side,   hand   up   to   shield.   he   doesn’t   move   from   his   seat,   he   doesn’t   panic,   but   he   does   cut   letitia   a   look,   surveying   her   for   injuries.    with   a   purse   of   his   lips,   he   flips   a   few   switches   on   the   equipment,   lungs   filling   with   a   steadying   breath.    not   wanting   to   take   a   chance   with   calm   down,   he   leaves   letitia   to   do   what   aids   her.    the   whispering   of   prayer   isn’t   lost   on   him,   but   he   decides   that   whatever   makes   her   feel   comfortable   is   what   she   should   do.   picking   up   the   clipboard,   casper   lifts   the   top   paper   to   reveal   a   blank   form.    a   beep   comes   from   one   of   the   machines,   and  casper   begins   to   scribble   the   reading.    ❛❛     i   know   that   this   is   obvious,   but   we’re   not   alone.     ❜❜   𝙷𝙰𝚅𝙴𝙽'𝚃 𝙱𝙴𝙴𝙽 𝙵𝙾𝚁 𝙰 𝚆𝙷𝙸𝙻𝙴.    side   -   glance   is   cast   at   letitia,   and     another   machine   turns   itself   on.   ❛❛      there's   more   than   one,     ❜❜    casper's   brows   arch,   and   while   he’s   mildly   surprised   by   this,   he’s   nowhere   near   where   letitia   is.    again,   he   doesn’t   tell   her   what   to   do,   doesn’t   tell   her   to   collect   herself.   there's   no   need   for   that,   as   whatever   she’s   feeling,   she’ll   dive   deep   with   it   and   come   up   for   air   when   she’s   ready.    casper   dips   his   chin,   watching   the   waves   and   lines   and   symbols   that   tell   him   exactly   what's   happening.   the   radio’s   volume   eases   up   on   its   own:    you   can't   hurry   love,   no,   you'll   just   have   to   wait.    ❛❛      attention   is   what   they   want,   but   what   else?   we’ll   have   to   find   out   the   old   -   fashioned   way,      ❜❜    eyes   dart,   more   scribbles,   and   he   heaves   a   sigh.    ❛❛      we   should   talk   to   them.    i've   brought   something   that   will   help   with   that,   but   i’ll   need   you   for   it.   it's   a   two   -   person   job.      ❜❜    𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙷𝙾𝚃𝙻𝙸𝙽𝙴.    there’s   a   box   near   the   booth,   and   he   digs   through   it,   fishing   out   a   decade   -   old   pink   phone.    there   is   no   connection,   just   the   phone   itself,   and   he   places   it   in   the   center   of   the   table.   ❛❛      once   it   rings,   we   must   answer   it.   i’ll   go   first,   then   you.    whatever   you   hear?     ❜❜    cant   of   head,   his   eyes   meet   letitia’s   with   utmost   seriousness.    ❛❛      don’t   tell   me   until   the   full   conversation   is   over,      ❜❜    casper   frowns   quickly   before   adding:   ❛❛     otherwise   bad   things   will   happen.      ❜❜    𝙷𝙴 𝙼𝙴𝙰𝙽𝚂 𝙸𝚃.    another   breath,   and   within   a   minute   of   silence,   the   phone   begins   to   ring.    𝙽𝙾𝚆 𝙾𝚁 𝙽𝙴𝚅𝙴𝚁.

HARD EYES CAUGHT HIS !    and she nodded her head with a silent understanding.   there was no need to keep praying anymore.   ( you would think she would already have learned that! )  ,    and her mouth shut with a stained red lips as she slowly turned her body back toward the man.    she moved her head from side to side,   releasing the tension from her shoulders as her fingers ran up and down arm to check for any cuts.    she listened,   but there was a touch of distraction energy———     these curses seemed to follow her,   clinging to the edge of her skin or the collars of her coats.  fingers rubbed against each cheek, checking her pulse in the process before she stood up.   glass broke under he heels as she looked down at the table.       

there were a few small cuts on her skin,   but letitia didn’t give it much attention. not when things became so strange so quickly.    SHE NEW THIS WAS THE JOB,  BUT SHE DIDN’T EXPECT IT TO BE SO VIOLENT.    when the radio turned up,  she looked over her shoulder at it,   swaying her hips to get a better view before turning her attention back him.   ❛❛  ain’t that pretty obvious ?    maybe they just want to listen to some tunes. . . ❜❜       that wasn’t the case,  but a girl could dream. 

her nose scrunched at the phone dropped in the center of the table,   and her head tipped to one side with curiosity before she looked back at casper.   TRUST  / now that was still a struggle fo her.    her head nodded in understanding,     and she crossed her arms across her chest as she continued to watch the phone,    and a sense of distrust tightened her features.     ❛❛  so once you answer,   you stay until its over.  seems easy enough. . .   ❜❜    she bent at the knee, crouching down     so she was eye level with the phone.    once it rang,   she arched her brows and focused across to casper.     ❛❛  i think it’s for you,  doc.   ❜❜    

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me, at midnight, thinkin about the appropriation of white musical artists of the early 60s off black musicians of the 50s.  

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Little Richard | Long Tall Sally

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whose gonna write tic.

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Silently Serene Starters Nonverbal Edition

Send in one of the following to have my muse (or yours if you add + reverse)

[Comb] - Running their fingers through their hair.

[Lookout] - Watch them sleep for a little while.

[Cover] - Wrap them in a blanket or something else.

[Keeper] - Hold them close.

[Tend] - Take care of them in a weakened state.

[Nonsense] - Find them attempting something ridiculous.

[Take] - Borrow something of theirs, purposely or by accident.

[Laze] - Find them being carelessly relaxing.

[Repose] - Calm down in their presence.

[Lean] - Rest some part of them against the other.

[Embrace] - Give them physical affection.

[Chance] - Get to do something they normally couldn’t.

[Opportunity] - Show them something new.

[Expose] - Share something unknown with them.

[Partner] - Help them with a task.

[Worn] - Find them drained but still going.

[Blithe] - Find them feeling pleasant and carefree.

[Veiled] - Find them hiding, or hiding something.

[Soft] - Be gentle and comforting.

[Elude] - Avoid or diffuse a tense situation.

[Guard] - Be protective of them or in their defense.

[Ramble] - Talking about something not too important.

[Mind]- Find them thinking or lost in thought.

[Refresh] - Bring them food after a long day.

[Free] - Make one of your own!

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Jurnee Smollett-Bell for EBONY Magazine - Behind The Cover

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JURNEE SMOLLETT as Letitia Lewis in Lovecraft Country | 1x04 - A History of Violence