s-zephyr

[s-zephyr]

i do love that you can name pets pretty much anything. with children you have to be reasonable but with pets you can just do anything. you can name your tortoise panopticon

[s-zephyr]

obsessed with this. grandprev. much better than prev prev prev or whatever honestly I like it

[s-zephyr]

[s-zephyr]

[s-zephyr]

ourgh discworld is still so good

[s-zephyr]

i used to have no hope for the future but now i'm thinking. i want rich people food. i want rare sirloin steak. i've never had sirloin steak in my life. i think i want to try it before i die.

[s-zephyr]

The worst trick a childhood anxiety disorder pulls is, you spend your early years being applauded for being so much more mature than your peers, because you aren’t disruptive, you don’t want any kind of attention, you don’t express yourself, you keep yourself to yourself - this makes you a pleasure to have in class, etc etc - and you start to believe it’s virtue. But you’re actually way behind your peers in normal social development, and who knows if you can ever catch up.

[s-zephyr]

Miss Piggy’s Treasury of Art Masterpieces from the Kermitage Collection is a picture book featuring sixteen (minus the “The Birth of Venus” parody) different muppet parodies of famous artwork, edited by Henry Beard and illustrated by John E. Barrett, and published by Holt, Rinehart and Winston in 1984.

A majority of the illustrations were originally from the Miss Piggy’s Art Masterpiece Calendar which were all reprinted with commentary from Miss Piggy herself and new additions that expanded on the “Kermitage Collection” from the calendar.

illustrations continued:

Henri Rousseau. The Sleepy Zootsy.

Rembrant van Rijn. Arisfroggle Contemplating the Bust of a Twerp.

Jan Vermeer. Young Lady Adorning Herself with Pearls (and Why Not?).

Grant Wood. American Gothique.

Pablo Picasso. Pig Before a Mirror.

[s-zephyr]

i <3 tiktaalik

[s-zephyr]

[s-zephyr]

people needdddd to wear headphones in public because while on an otherwise very lovely walk in the park today i saw a guy sitting under a tree watching a porn parody of the star wars prequels

[s-zephyr]

i bet count von count has killer fuckin music taste

[s-zephyr]

I was trying to think of a way to explain why this is stupid and also ghoulish. I think I came up with something.

Imagine you are an engineer designing body armor. You are tasked with making sure the body armor can stop 10 different types of bullets. In your first attempt, you create body armor that stops 6 of the 10 bullets. You start selling those because that's pretty good protection. You can save some lives while you continue to improve things.

You already know how to stop 6 bullets, but you really want to figure out how to stop the last 4. So you do exactly what you did before, but add a few more layers of Kevlar and a steel plate.

Your boss, RFK Jr., says he wants a test of the new and improved body armor. But he says you have to give one test subject the real thing and the other test subject fake body armor that does nothing.

And you're like, "Hey, can I at least give them the body armor that stops 6 bullets? We already know that gives some protection. We only need to compare the new armor to what we already accomplished."

And RFK says, "No, please shoot a person dead. It's science."

[s-zephyr]

[s-zephyr]

I love Brennan's commitment to reminding you that he was hideously bullied for being a fucking weird nerd, ESPECIALLY when you're watching content about how outrageously successful and beloved he is now for being a fucking weird nerd.

Dita Von Teese was so right, you really can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches. And depending on the social dynamics of your school, there may be a few high-status people who hate peaches who can bring enough people on board to make your life a living hell.

Brennan was bullied so badly that he had to be pulled out of school and homeschooled. Those kids hated his ass! And look at him now. What more proof do you need that being surrounded by people who want to kill you during your school years doesn't say fucking anything about how loveable you are or what your life will be like as an adult.