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on hold with the pest control company for work, and their hold message seriously just hit me with

"did you know there are a million ants for every human on earth? someone will be with you shortly"

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Art dump ^_^ off I go for a week again probably bye bye 👋

If only people ever asked me about my hcs …

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"Femininity is rewarded!" "No, masculinity is rewarded!"

You're both wrong. It's perceived gender conformity that's actually rewarded.

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ranking the best things I have heard surgeons say mid-surgery:

1. "Five second rule!" while scrubbed, after dropping a sterile scalpel on the floor (no they did NOT pick it up again but I swear everyone's buttholes puckered)

2. (spoken during the closing of a particularly long and difficult case) "Nurse - my tunes." :heavy metal starts blasting:

3. Gently to a fretful patient, pre-anaesthesia: "It's going to be okay. I promise, I've dealt with worse." As soon as the patient is unconscious: "This is literally the worst thing I've ever seen."

4. [okay this one was a med student] "Wowwww, that's so gross!!" Reg: "Please remember that [patient] is awake for this procedure." Student to patient: "Oh my god. I am so sorry, that was really unprofessional - " Patient, cheerfully, also engrossed with what's happening inside them on the screen: "Nah - it's, like, super gross, right?"

5. [another procedure where the patient couldn't be put under GA] Patient: *starts singing country roads midway through the procedure* Surgeon: *shrugs and joins in with surprisingly good harmony*

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Just found out I was thirsty not by receiving a signal from my body about it but by dozing off and dreaming about cold water from different alluring angles. This is great. I think all my wants and needs should be revealed to me this way

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we’re really at that point in the year where no one cares about anything huh

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if prince sidon ever swears then BY GOD he's gonna swear it with 𝓰𝓻𝓪𝓬𝓮

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Вставай, скоро молоко раздавать будут!…

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Day 16 - Time

“You played the Song of Time!”

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The other night husband and I were watching a documentary about the yeti where they were doing DNA analysis of samples of supposed yeti fur, and every one of them came back as bears.

Anyway, the next night we watched a thing about some pig man who is supposed to live in Vermont. People said it had claws and a pig nose but walked upright like a man. Now, I happen to know that sideshows used to shave bears and present them as pig men. So every piece of evidence they gave of this monster sounds to me like a bear with mange.

So now the running joke in our house is that everything is bears. Aliens? Bears. Loch Ness monster? Bear. Every cryptozoological mystery is just a very crafty bear.

Bears. They’re everywhere. Be wary. Anyone or anything could be a bear.

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quick lil fanart of miss princess zelda 🐉

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This one really popped off on Twitter …

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I actually passed away quite a few years ago, but I'm a very private person and never told anybody.

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Reblog daily for health and prosperity

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art prompt: draw a creature/animal that fits the name Scrimpering Whimperlet