saltysciencesixer

[saltysciencesixer]

I haven't written anything here yet, but I should probably mention my activity is going to be slow to non-existent here. My younger brother died on September 28th. He was only 35. I'm grieving. I'm often struck by flashes of pain when I think of how I will no longer see him on this Earth.

In recent times, I've tried to avoid talking about personal matters, and keep this a just-for-fun RP blog. But my brother's death has brought to memory something very important. You see, I'm a Christian (who does not believe in harassing the LGBTQ+ community and thinks LGBTQ+ identifying people should be welcomed in Christian communities - and it's sad that Christian communities in their current state have forced me to add that disclaimer), and I firmly believe that my brother, also a believer, went to Heaven. It has brought me immense comfort in this trying time even though I still feel the pain of his loss and miss him.

But I worry about other people not going to heaven. I worry about the people I've RPed with or laughed at their posts. I won't pressure or force the issue. I know I can't force the issue. I know Jesus wouldn't want that. It's even said in the Bible that the Gospel (The Good News - that Jesus died for every bad thing we have said, thought, or done or our inaction causing bad things to occur, rose from the grave after three days, and will forgive us of all those bad things if we just ask and put our faith in him) should be presented with all gentleness and respect. I think Jesus would welcome anyone regardless of race, orientation, gender identity, etc. He really does love us all.

I know a lot of people think being a "good person" is enough. But no one is truly good. There's a secular, non-religious, and rather comedic show called "The Good Place" that actually breaks down rather well why being "a morally good person" overall is pretty much impossible - it uses a lot of philosophical concepts.

I also think that Jesus as a Savior necessarily implies that there is something He's saving us from. Hell. I know God is real and loving, and I don't have all the answers. Is Hell eternal punishment? I don't know. Possibly. But the Bible also says that only believers in Jesus will be granted eternal life. So maybe Hell is just punishment and death (the translation does seem tricky in parts). I don't know. I only know I don't want people going there.

I just really needed to put this out there. I'm not trying to scare or hurt anyone. I just felt legitimately concerned because my brother's death reminded me that one day, we'll all die, and because of my beliefs, I have a strong desire to see all my friends go to heaven (and my acquaintances - and strangers, too - I really don't want anyone to go to hell). It's okay if I didn't convince you. I hope we can still be friends.

If you have any questions or thoughts you want to share, please field them to an account I'll be using to write or reblog on matters pertaining to my faith.

@onethousandwords

[saltysciencesixer]

I don't normally do this but I really need help. After a week of HELL of trying to save her life, My mother passed away Sunday and I have no way to bury her ;; if you can donate or just reblog I would be so very grateful.

[saltysciencesixer]

they need to have a long talk methinks...

[saltysciencesixer]

Bill Cipher, The Blind Eye

So, I recently saw this video involving the Destruction is a Form of Creation McGucket doodle page on this is not a website dot com as well as the wallpapers from Dispense My Treat. And I was immediately struck by some thoughts involving that video as well as the Book of Bill in general (as well as looking back on the show). Buckle up because there's a lot of stuff here. The main crux of this theory is that Bill is severely vision-impaired. Let's start with two examples relating to my first point in regards to Bill Cipher's vision impairment.

Squinting here trying to read the combination to Stan's safe.

Arguably, the other example could be in Weirdmageddon when despite Ford having a cleft chin and Stan not having one - Bill was unable to tell the two apart. Now, this could just be because it's hard to tell twins apart in general, and Bill doesn't seem like the type to pay very close attention to detail. But... Let's look at the other evidence. In the Book of Bill, we see this sort of flashback pov from that time Stan punched Bill near the end of Weirdmageddon.

Now, maybe this is just for effect. Or maybe this is how Bill actually saw Stan at the time - covered in static because he can't actually see that well. We also have from the Book of Bill evidence that Bill's vision could have been impacted badly in some way. "Eye doctor of a different kind / Wants to make his patient blind" and "Three sips a day to make the visions go away."

In the Book of Bill, there's also this question in the "Intelligence Test" section. I think this may, in fact, be a legitimate question of Bill's. He sees something akin to this in the same way one might see "floaters" "vision spots" or "vision snow" (in people who have that condition). And then going back to that video of the Destruction is a Form of Creation doodle, I noticed some interesting things. I decided to try and recreate the way the images were overlayed and-

This is the Seeyouinmydreams wallpaper that lines up with the stars on the corner of the McGucket doodle. If you look at the writing within this image, It says "I MIGHT HAVE TO TO TELL FORD I CANNOT SEE HIM." Is this one of Bill's dreams?

HE IS BLIND is right next to this Bill statue (which also has some rectangular boxes scribbled in covered over his eyes). It also has "I might be wrong" here - so this could be an acknowledgment that Bill is not FULLY blind - just partially.

Finally, there's the fact that Fiddleford McGucket is the founder of the Society of the Blind Eye. If Bill Cipher is "blind" as McGucket sees it, does this mean the society was centered around Bill? Food for thought: Why was the Society of the Blind Eye located in what looked to be a Bill Cipher Temple? (Watch the episode again - one of the ways to enter the Society of the Blind Eye temple was through pressing a triangle with an eye at the center of it - and if you look on the Society of the Blind Eye page in the Gravity Falls wiki, it talks about how the Pythagorean theorem is written on one of the pillars in the temple). I have A LOT more thoughts about McGucket and the Book of Bill as well which I will post later.

[saltysciencesixer]

Ford why do they call it an oven when you of in the cold food and ov out eat the hot food

"Just when you thought some questions couldn't get more asinine. Ask your mother."

[saltysciencesixer]

OldManWhoNeedsAnGPSSaysWhat-

"What?"

[saltysciencesixer]

“You’re lost in this world. Wandering without a purpose.”

"My purpose is to love and protect my family and advance science. I'm not lost!"

... Mostly.

[saltysciencesixer]

How much blood have you spilled? How much death have you seen? Don’t you think your actions are reckless?

"I -"

A heaviness settled on his shoulders. "I'd prefer not to answer that question. I did what I had to do. I tried. I know it wasn't good enough. It's never good enough."

[saltysciencesixer]

“You’re an emotionless robot.”

"I once had an opportunity to completely remove my emotions in favor of being purely rational. But then, I realized I was practically surviving on anger and spite and dismissed the idea. I am not emotionless - I experience many emotions in a varied range. As for a robot, I'm 89.9% sure that I am not one, or if I am, I'm a significantly advanced robot that seems indistinguishable from an organic lifeform."

[saltysciencesixer]

Questions/Comments to be sent anonymously!

(though off anon is fine too!)

“Is there someone you hold dear?”

“Don’t you feel any guilt?”

“You’re actually afraid to be alone, aren’t you?”

“There must be something you fear.”

“Do you have a home?”

“Is there someone you like?”

“Are you really expecting a positive outcome out of this?”

“Aren’t you ashamed?”

“Aren’t you happy?”

“Who do you despise?” 

“How do you sleep at night?”

“How do you manage to keep going despite everything?”

“What do you think of kindness?”

“What do you think of hatred?”

“Why do you fight?”

“Why do you live?”

“How much blood have you spilled?”

“How much death have you seen?”

“Don’t you think your actions are reckless?”

“Don’t you know how much good you’ve done for others?”

“Can’t you tell they love you?”

“Can’t you see he/she would die for you?”

“Can’t you see that they hate you?”

“Can’t you tell the truth for once?”

“You’re not tainted.”

“You’re not alone.”

“You’re awful.”

“You don’t think of anyone but yourself.”

“You’re an emotionless robot.”

“You’re just a lap dog.”

“It’s not over.”

“He/she needs you.”

“Stop lying.”

“Stop fighting.”

“Stop pushing others away.”

“You’re cruel.”

“You’re far too kind. Too kind for your own good.”

“You depend on him/her too often.”

“You’re overprotective, it’s stifling.”

“You’re too impulsive, it’s reckless.”

“You’re too careless, it’s a liability.”

“He/she is bringing you down.”

“You’re too timid, it’s easy to see you as a target.”

“You need to listen.”

“You need to speak up more often.”

“You’re weak.”

“You’re strong. Stronger than you’ll ever know.”

“You’re too proud.”

“Quit blaming others for your mistakes.”

“You won’t always be around to save him/her.”

“One day, he/she won’t need you anymore.”

“You can’t cheat death.”

“You can’t hide forever.”

“They’ll find out the truth eventually.”

“That person is only holding you back.”

“They’re too good for you.”

“You’ll be rewarded for your efforts if you keep trying.”

“It will get better.”

“You look lonely.”

“You look bitter.”

“You look tired.”

“You’re hiding a painful burden.”

“You’re perfect.”

“You’re beautiful.”

“You will always be worthless.”

“Your hands are too dirty, too tainted to be clean.”

“You’re lost in this world. Wandering without a purpose.”

“You’ll rise above them all.” 

“You’ll find your place in this world.”

“Eventually, someone will knock you off your pedestal.”

[saltysciencesixer]

Would Ford ever willingly choose to do dimension hopping again if the opportunity presented itself?

"The multiverse is a vast unknown and incomprehensibly dangerous. I had my fill of it for thirty years. What I didn't have in that time was my family. And that is an adventure I would be remiss to let go unexplored any longer. I would not leave them behind, and I would not put them in untold amounts of danger I wouldn't be sure I could protect them from."

He clasped his hands behind his back. "Do I miss traveling between dimensions? From time to time, yes. But I love my family much more."

[saltysciencesixer]

Felt a need to draw hugs (thinking about sea grunks has made me extra emotional :’))

[saltysciencesixer]

Ford wasn't sure why she was apologizing to him. He continued to look mistrustful as she told him she thought he was sad.

"I'm not sad." He wasn't about to talk "feelings" with a stranger. "And I don't need your help."

He didn't sound angry or annoyed - just very matter-of-fact. He paused. "However, I appreciate your attempt to engage in positive social interaction with me."

He stood there awkwardly a moment with his hands behind his back. What do people normally do in this situation in this dimension?

"The temperature is a pleasant 77 degrees fahrenheit. The cloud cover percentage over this area is approximately twenty-three percent. The chance of rain is negligible."

He seems like these questions are getting to him, and she doesn't know what to do, so she just. Pats him. Gently on the arm.

He jerked his arm away. "That isn't a common greeting in this dimension."

He paused, then he seemed to relax just slightly. Very slightly. He still seemed all too tense. He always did.

"My apologies. I'm... not in a good mood. But also, I do not know you. I would prefer you hold off on attempts to illicit a comforting response via touch as it gives me doubt of your intentions."

[saltysciencesixer]

Ford's heart clenched painfully at seeing her wide, tearful eyes. It felt like getting smacked in the face when Mabel blurted out that she bet Dipper wouldn't have done what? Gotten tricked by Bill? Honestly, he wished she would smack him. He would've deserved it. This was all his fault. He'd been showing favoritism to Dipper, and Mabel was paying the consequences for it. He should've known better. Look where his father's favoritism had gotten him and Stanley.

"Dipper... knew about the rift, though," Ford said, uneasiness settling in his stomach. One of his hands went up to the back of his neck, rubbing anxiously. He couldn't just tell her why he hadn't trusted her, why he had trusted Dipper over her because he had reminded him so much of himself, and he was grateful that was something he was wrong about, too, because Dipper had a much better head on his shoulders than he ever did.

"I should've told you, too," he said, instead. His voice was getting heavy with regret. "I don't know what all happened between you and Bill because your brother thought it best to let you come to me first, but I know if you'd known what the rift was, you would've protected it - and thus protected us, your family, and the world. I know this because you're a good person, Mabel, and you've already proven the lengths you'll go to help your family. Remember the unicorn hair? You accomplished a feat I never was able to, and your deeds that day should've proven to me your capabilities and resolve then and there. I was foolish, Mabel. You must understand that. I should be the one asking for your forgiveness."

Ford gave a heavy sigh, then a nod. "I know. And you have every right to feel that way. But Mabel, look at the good you're doing. It's thanks to your love for your family - and scrapbooking -" He managed to quirk a small smile. "That Stanley is getting his memories back at all. I'd thought they were gone for good, but you didn't give up. At the rate he's been remembering, he might make a full recovery. That's because of you."

He gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. He didn't tear his gaze away from her for a moment - even though it hurt him to see her crying. "Yes, dear girl. I've never been more sure about anything in my life."

It was true. As a scientist and as someone who had dealt with all the horrors Bill had to offer, he'd been in a constant state of doubt of just about everything. He half-expected to wake up - in the Fearamid or in this shack, empty and alone, covered in injuries - He put a stop on that train of thought. He'd treat reality as it was until proven otherwise and only then. And right now, the current state of reality and the most fixed fact in his mind at that moment was that Mabel was NOT at fault for Weirdmageddon.

He grimaced slightly when she told him she didn't think bottling things up was healthy. "It... probably isn't," Ford said, a wisp of uncertainty entering his voice.

Though, healthy or unhealthy, he was not going to be unbottling any of his own issues to his niece. No one deserved that.

He pulled his hand away a moment. "Which is why I'm glad you're talking to me about this."

Whatever Ford had been working on (something to do with a microscope) was immediately neglected the moment Mabel approached him and began talking about... Causing Weirdmageddon??? His eyes had gone wide, and for a few seconds, he looked horrified. He tried to school his expression - something he was usually very good at, but even with it shifting more into neutral mode, there was a quiet desperation in his eyes. Without hesitation he left the lab bench - closing the distance between them in a mere moment. He crouched down and placed a six-fingered hand gently on her small shoulder.

"Dear girl, no," Ford said, softly but emphatically. "No. Mabel, you didn't cause Weirdmageddon. You're not the first person to have been tricked by Bill. If anyone, besides Bill himself, is to blame for Weirdmageddon, it's me. I didn't tell you or Stanley about the rift that needed protecting when I should've trusted my family. I was the one who summoned Bill here in the first place so many years ago. I built the portal that would allow him entry into our world. I failed to destroy him in all my thirty years traveling the multiverse. You are not and never will be at fault for any of this."

His voice was steady and sincere. He searched her eyes, hoping she'd believe him. The idea of her blaming herself for his mess, his mistakes - Sweet Sagan, she was only twelve. It was too much for him to bear to think of her trying to shoulder that weight.

[saltysciencesixer]

Whatever Ford had been working on (something to do with a microscope) was immediately neglected the moment Mabel approached him and began talking about... Causing Weirdmageddon??? His eyes had gone wide, and for a few seconds, he looked horrified. He tried to school his expression - something he was usually very good at, but even with it shifting more into neutral mode, there was a quiet desperation in his eyes. Without hesitation he left the lab bench - closing the distance between them in a mere moment. He crouched down and placed a six-fingered hand gently on her small shoulder.

"Dear girl, no," Ford said, softly but emphatically. "No. Mabel, you didn't cause Weirdmageddon. You're not the first person to have been tricked by Bill. If anyone, besides Bill himself, is to blame for Weirdmageddon, it's me. I didn't tell you or Stanley about the rift that needed protecting when I should've trusted my family. I was the one who summoned Bill here in the first place so many years ago. I built the portal that would allow him entry into our world. I failed to destroy him in all my thirty years traveling the multiverse. You are not and never will be at fault for any of this."

His voice was steady and sincere. He searched her eyes, hoping she'd believe him. The idea of her blaming herself for his mess, his mistakes - Sweet Sagan, she was only twelve. It was too much for him to bear to think of her trying to shoulder that weight.

" . . . i'm sorry i caused the whole... thing with bill taking over, " her voice, usually boisterous and loud and quite overbearing is meek, quiet, and almost like she's wanting to whisper it. " i never apologized and i feel like i need to. genuinely. i just didn't want to end summer. i wanted everything to stay the same. it was selfish. "

[saltysciencesixer]

I'm joining the war on self indulgence on the side of self indulgence

[saltysciencesixer]

44 , 47 , 58

"I would not sacrifice my life and journey and memories for a chance to start over. For one, there are people who have placed a high value on my life despite the fact that I have done little to earn it. Two, I would not give up everything I have learned for that would leave me vulnerable and at risk of repeating things I would care not to repeat."

He blinked at the next question.

"Four things I like about myself? Hm. Well, I like my ability to protect the people I care about... in the few instances I've managed to succeed at that. My intelligence... when I'm not using it in a way that gets me or the people I love in trouble. I like my determination... when it is not hurting the people I love. And..."

He paused. "And... hm. I might need to get back to you on this one."

He managed a smile. "What I like about this world, this Earth, is that the people I care about are in it."