sardonicsergeant

[sardonicsergeant]

AUSTIN POWERS: INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY (1997) dir. Jay Roach

Austin Powers: [holding Scott hostage] It seems the tables have turned again, Dr. Evil.

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Any idiot can like something thats good. It takes a real genius to like things that suck ass

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i'm entering the next phase of my life: tuesday afternoon

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There's something very charming about when beetles open up their wing covers in this big dramatic display just to fly less than ten centimetres.

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Princess who knows nothing about sex and the knight who's more than willing to teach her everything

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girl who desperately craves something but is also deathly afraid of reaching for it: *hasnt responded to you in a week*

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“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

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They should block chatgpt on uni WiFi the way they used to block coolmathgames

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i dont give a FUCK any more man this has gone TOO far i'm deleting ALL the exclamation points from my work emails. that's right. i hope you have a good weekend. and no more than that

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i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

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Sometimes l'm late because I sit like this for a long time

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bitches hate me for my earnest whimsy and my pathological degree of avoidant behavior