sarievenea - Tumblr blog

[sarievenea]

i think when some of you say "neurodivergent" you just mean adhd and autism

[sarievenea]

I am learning to imagine the future:

My sycamore tree began life in the gravel at the edge of a parking lot. If trees can feel pain, that is a painful, unlucky death. I carefully dug it up and put it in a pot I made out of a disposable cup.

Hello small one. This world may be cruel, but I will not be.

I decided to take care of it, not expecting it to survive, and when my sycamore tree unfurled one tiny leaf and then another, it chiseled a tiny foothold in my terrified brain, the kind of brain that doesn't remember a world before the atomic bomb and before 9/11.

I googled the lifespans of trees. My neurons had to stretch and expand to accommodate what I learned: My sycamore tree may live five hundred years. It's hard to think something so big. In twenty years, my baby sycamore tree will be three stories tall, and the home of many creatures. In five years, my sycamore tree will be taller than I am. In one year, it will be summer.

There's this concept called sense of foreshortened future where people who have lived through trauma can't conceptualize a future for themselves because deep down they don't expect to survive, When I look forward, all I see is fire and death, melting ice and burning sky. We were raised Evangelical. All we see is Judgment Day, except there is no heaven.

But now there is a tiny gap in the wall, a crack in the door of my cell

and on the other side, I see a tree

There is, in the future, a great old sycamore tree, full of clean winds and the stir of a thousand wings. A hundred years from now. Fifty years from now. There will be forests in that world. There will be a world.

It takes courage, but we have to imagine it.

Most tree species can live in excess of three or four hundred years. I think I'm learning something. I think there are ancient voices saying hello small one, touch the dirt and the leaves, for now you are part of something that cannot die

in 2030 I will be thirty years old and the world will not have ended and there will still be hummingbirds, and we will have photos of the stars more beautiful than we can now imagine.

I planted an Eastern Redcedar; they may live nine hundred years. There will be nine hundred years. The people in that time will remember us. Maybe we will meet the aliens (hi aliens!).

I will blow out the candles on many birthday cakes in a world where there are wolves in dark forests far from home. I am learning to imagine the future. I learned recently that elk were reintroduced to the Appalachian Mountains after over a hundred years of extirpation, and that they are expanding their range.

That tiny crack I can see through now opens a tiny bit more:

Maybe elk will pass through my hometown, maybe there will be a forest where the pasture is on the high hill that I can see from my home

say it, say it, say it: ten years, thirty years, a hundred years from now

I am learning to imagine the future. There is a crack in the wall of this prison, of this machine, of this darkness, and through it, I see a tree.

[sarievenea]

Bridgerton Ladies + Greek Goddesses

[sarievenea]

My sweet tiny Bug Princess. You delight me more every day. You are such a good big sister, such a thoughtful friend to bugs and people and Tias alike. It’s my honor to watch you grow into the amazing woman you will become. #zoeesther #tiaismyfavoritejob https://www.instagram.com/p/Cc4e6qqLGiz/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[sarievenea]

Some days you’re the crab, some days you’re the crab cake. #launchparty #crabguts #beadyeyes #thatnonprofitlife #otherdutiesasassigned https://www.instagram.com/p/CcCjX9qLIkm/?utm_medium=tumblr

[sarievenea]

I recently saw a post lamenting how expensive sewing as a hobby is, which has been nagging me all day and of course now I can’t find it anymore.

It is, in fact, quite an extensive hobby and you can get bogged down by the capitalism monster thinking you need to buy a ton of things right away. You don’t! I’ve been sewing most of my life and have been slowly collecting tools and things as I need them but you can start off real small! Here are some random tips from me to you:

Sewing patterns: there are butt loads of free patterns all over the internet. Check out Mood patterns, Peppermint magazine, and your local library for the pattern bind up books if you’re lucky. However, indie patterns are totally worth the price, especially for beginners. They tend to have great instructions and better fit than the paper patterns you can find in stores and they come from people with a real passion for sewing. If you’re going more historical costuming, some of the free patterns can be finagled, but your best bet (besides drafting) is to purchase patterns depending on your era, just avoid Sense and Sensibility patterns. You can also find vintage patterns, but the instructions and fit are a tad different than you may be used to, especially for beginners. Shameless plug anyway for my vintage pattern shop.

Fabric: don’t be scared of your thrift store! Ive found lengths of fabric a couple times, but I always check for sheets and tablecloths that I like the look and feel of. You can get natural fibers wayyyy cheaper this way and tho it’s an extra step you can dye or overdye to get the color you want. The black fabric in this stack was faded so I dyed it darker black with Rit and the yellow I dyed with marigolds from my garden.

Notions/random bits and bobs: ask your friends and family! Sewing used to be basically ubiquitous and has gone out of style so as a result there are more vintage sewing supplies in the world than you could ever want and usually people hold on to them until they can find a good home. I’ve gotten so much random bullshit from my mom and grandmas and friends just by announcing that I love to sew. Obvi don’t be rude or conspiratorial, but esp older folks love to share their love of the craft.

Machine: cheapest is to inherit one, but you can usually find some older models at thrift stores or on Craigslist/fb marketplace. I found my serger for a decent discount from a company that refurbishes sewing machines.

I hope this helps anyone who is interested in sewing but scared of the starting costs. It’s a bit of a learning and cost curve, but the internet has helped break that down so much.

[sarievenea]

i’m pretty sure at this point if someone held me tenderly id just black out

[sarievenea]

Mom and I went for the first hike of the summer at #talusrocks! I investigated a fae gate. Decided to stay in this world. #middleearth #cougarmountain #hikingwithdogs (at High Point:Talus Rocks) https://www.instagram.com/p/CayRk0irIN-/?utm_medium=tumblr

[sarievenea]

Kudos to fanfiction writers for writing about all the trauma and emotional and mental turmoil that the original content creators dont acknowledge when putting characters through hell

[sarievenea]

[sarievenea]

For those who have overactive guilt complexes like me…

[sarievenea]

Moana (2016)

[sarievenea]

Today I walked for Cecelia and Florine and all of those who came home missing a part of their spirit. I walked for those who never came home at all. I walked for those who are still searching for home, still finding those pieces. I walked for my father, my brothers and sisters, for myself. I walked so that the little ones won’t have to carry these burdens. #orangeshirtday2021 #everychildmatters🧡 #boardingschoolsurvivors #intergenerationaltrauma #endswithme (at St. James Cathedral) https://www.instagram.com/p/CUddqbevA-sC9NGDHxnb03B5xgaZiZSR6rhZds0/?utm_medium=tumblr

[sarievenea]

Up to my old tricks with 24 jars of Ginger Pear Jam. It’s delightful. Who wants to come hang out and learn how to make Honeycrisp apple jelly tomorrow? #canning #sustainableeating #gingerpearjam #applejelly https://www.instagram.com/p/CUOnIuNrAZPjoOaTCpb_xr0GHguajlyuVsaRZs0/?utm_medium=tumblr

[sarievenea]

Growing up in a family of eight on one very limited income, canning was a way to provide food through the winter. For a month late every summer, the kitchen was filled with smells of jam, jelly, pickles, salsa, corn, applesauce, tomato sauce, and anything else my amazing mom could cram into a jar! We kids learned to avoid the house for hours during pickle week, to show up just in time to skim the foam off the strawberry rhubarb jam, and how to slice an apple into one long strip with a ancient cast iron apple corer. And all winter, despite the snow and isolation of rural Eastern Washington, we always had the tastes and smells of summer with every opened jar. These memories are so precious. . Today, I spent my day using these precious skills to preserve the peaches off our tree, a harvest that we can enjoy in a sustainable, healthy way throughout the year until she blooms and fruits again next summer. I am so proud of the teachings my mother passed down, and I can’t wait to pass them along to the next generation. #sustainableharvest #sustainableeating #canning #preserving #peachjam #strawberryrhubarb https://www.instagram.com/p/CSa2FuUrYPxUmVYj3iDJRrdf3ETVsZXWb6Gr880/?utm_medium=tumblr

[sarievenea]

Period Drama Appreciation Week

Day 1 ► Favorite Period Drama

Anne of Green Gables (1985) dir. Kevin Sullivan

[sarievenea]

My favorite humans came to see me today. So of course we strapped the 3 month old onto the car and demonstrated how to use the beep beep functions. He was less impressed than his sister thought he should be. #niblets #zoeesther #finleyowen #tiaisthebestjob https://www.instagram.com/p/CSTXG6MrN8UQKZ7-obmoBgyg1WoPObOT2pc-4Q0/?utm_medium=tumblr