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Ifeel nothing but exhaustion

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I know how trauma works, I know how PTSD works, I know all the psychology.

But I still feel so weak. When others were treated the same way, but they moved on and I still feel like I’m a bleeding wound.

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I hate that you still manipulate my thoughts and feelings, without even having contact with me.

Fucking parasite.

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I still miss you sometimes.

I really know I shouldn’t, you hurt me so much when I was helpless.

But sometimes I feel like that little kid that still wants to run up to you and be comforted.

I know you’d never give me that comfort. Even if I begged. But I need it, sometimes.

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Hi! Im a breadwinner. Sole provider of the family.

Im ready to die but Im thinking about my mom. I know she will be fine but I just cant leave her. Im tired. Im exhausted. She's the only reason I live for. Can I loose my grip now?

I’m so sorry that sounds really tough, I don’t know you or what you struggle with, but I think it’s worth asking for help in this moment.

The people around us, wether we think they care or not and wether we’re close to them or not, usually much prefer knowing that we’re struggling so that they can help us, rather than us dying and them grieving the loss. ❤️

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ha it’s a struggle

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“it doesn’t matter anymore” // 9.06.2013

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Notuing is real. I don’t understand what’s happening. Reality is falling apart.

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