schmoldy

[schmoldy]

in recent events of that zoo losing the clouded leopard, it reminded me of the time i went to a large petting zoo and there was a free roaming little black sheep. cutest little guy i ever saw, soi went to the zookeeper nearby and said ‘i think its really cute how you have a sheep thats allowed to just walk around. ‘ then the zookeepers eyes widened and he grabbed his walky talky and ran 

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sacré bleu...somebody âs deepthreauxted ze eiffel toweur

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why so many bots following me wth

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Reblog to give the person you reblogged this from a Croissant (🥐).

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haha these guys are all fucked up

Thinking about the nature of what Dave and Karkat faced in their childhoods and how they reflect on their development

Dave:

-The danger is restricted to an area, the area is an extension of the danger

-The danger is restricted to a single individual

-The danger will become a threat at known times and places

-When the danger becomes a threat it won’t be lethal

-The threat is recurrent and unavoidable, but temporary

Karkat:

-The danger is potentially everywhere

-The danger is potentially everyone

-The danger will become a threat when a mistake is made

-When the danger becomes a threat it will be lethal

-The scope of the threat is unknowable but the threat can be fled from

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jadekat

Alright, now that I'm done choosing fandom violence for the day, what's your favorite crackship and why do you like it?

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hey how are you now??

All this talk of blue checkmarks on tumbr ... If only I wasn’t on mobile and could be in on the joke.

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hehe robo dirk looks like sonic

AGGIE DOODLES

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oh shit i loved this so much

Narrative Town

Summary: You don’t ever want to be the main character. In your town, that’s deadly. Someone has to warn the new kid. 

——–.

Someone has got to tell the new kid in town the Rules.

“Hey,” you say.

The new kid looks up at you. He’s sitting at his desk in the back corner of the classroom, right next to the windows. It’s a chilly day, but he’s got the window open so that the breeze ruffles his curly, black hair. “What’s up? Fern, right?”

“Don’t call me by my name,” you snarl. Then, realizing what you’ve done, you look over your shoulder. The other teenagers are still looped around the teacher’s desk, trying to get Ms. Slauson to move the test date so they could organize a welcome part for the new kid. “I need to talk to you. Privately.”

The new kid leans back in his chair and studies you. You know what he sees – a completely average high school girl in jeans, a sweatshirt, and a ponytail. There’s nothing remarkable about you. He tilts his head. “You don’t look like a bully.”

You frown. “I’m not.”

“You’re being awfully threatening,” he says in a drawl.

The accent is going to be a problem. It’s southern and sounds really cool. Honestly, it might be too late for him already.

But you still have to try.

“Meet me on the rooftop—no!” You press the heel of one hand against your eye. Fight it, you tell yourself. Fight it! “Meet me at the supermarket on Western Street. The dairy aisle. After school.”

“Okay…?”

You spin on your heel, head throbbing. Meeting on the rooftop is against the rules. You glance up at the ceiling uneasily. You’re not usually affected by the compulsion so badly. Are you being targeted?

If you were smart, you wouldn’t show up to the meeting. You’d just let the guy get sucked into the madness on his own.

But you also really need to buy some milk.

Keep reading

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riveting

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I'm telling you one day I will snap and in a moment of total complete insanity I will format my entire pc and install fucking windows 95 on it

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<< POKEMON SCARLET AND VIOLET  >>

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i stole this

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Oh what heavens my finger myst have slipped and now I am speaking in an accent uncharacteristically formal goodness me

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i just learned how to format

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real

begging all of you to get a cup of hot chocolate just because i’ve been chugging hot chocolate lately and it’s really good. also i don’t feel like getting into internet arguments as often anymore bc i see someone being stupid and i go ok… and i drink my hot chocolate and i stop caring about them. i think everyone should drink some hot chocolate and stop caring

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there's a clothes boutique near me I go to way too often and the clothes are expensive and arent even exactly my taste but there's one thing going for that boutique I can't pass up on:

the owner basically REFUSES to stock pants and skirts that don't have GOOD pockets

there's either no pockets or you can fit your whole phone and wallet in them; there's no in between

and I just realised how sad it is that selling Functional Clothes is the reason I like that boutique so much. that is... a very low bar for so many other shops to be completely and utterly failing