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hi, a lot of you need a perspective reset

the average human lifespan globally is 70+ years

taking the threshold of adulthood as 18, you are likely to spend at least 52 years as a fully grown adult

at the age of 30 you have lived less than one quarter of your adult life (12/52 years)

'middle age' is typically considered to be between 45-65

it is extremely common to switch careers, start new relationships, emigrate, go to college for the first or second time, or make other life-changing decisions in middle age

it's wild that I even have to spell it out, but older adults (60+) still have social lives and hobbies and interests.

you can still date when you get old. you can still fuck. you can still learn new skills, be fashionable, be competitive. you can still gossip, you can still travel, you can still read. you can still transition. you can still come out.

young doesn't mean peaked. you're inexperienced in your 20s! you're still learning and practicing! you're developing social skills and muscle memory that will last decades!

there are a million things to do in the world, and they don't vanish overnight because an imaginary number gets too big

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The difference between pain erasing your selfhood and pain being a teacher is whether or not you have someone in your life who will be some kind of guide back to yourself. If there is no healing there is no lesson.

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When Dostoevsky said, "Pain changes you, but it teaches. That is its mercy." but Kafka said, "Pain changes nothing. It just repeats itself until you forget who you were before it started."

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I probably would have killed myself seven times by now if it weren’t for red efts

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2027: Wizards of the Coast and the American Psychological Association collaborate on the D&DSM, 6th Edition, widely regarded as the worst thing ever published

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watched the stalks of a lavender bush by the bus stop dip and sway from the sheer amount of fat little bumblebees on it and you know what. some things in this world are good

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btw curating a beautiful environment is about honouring yourself. when you choose to surround yourself with things that are well-made, thoughtfully designed, and meaningful, you affirm that your daily experience matters. investing in quality over convenience sends a subconscious message of self-worth that is completely foundational to building a better life.

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There is a standard media depiction of a "healed" person. Someone who has Gone To Therapy. I've noticed this in a few works recently. We often see them at the end of a story, maybe in a "ten years later" epilogue. They speak in a soft, serene voice. They have Accepted what they cannot change. They have let go of a lot, including most of what we see them actually care about in the story itself. They are Happy, At Peace, in some non-descript way. They bare little resemble to the person we were actually shown. They bare little resemblance to any person. We were shown, as we usually are in stories, an agent, a desirer, someone becoming. Now they have Become. And they look back on all that silly becoming as something childish that they have moved past. Fire, you know, fire is for children who don't know any better. To be Healed is to have your fire rightly extinguished; to not even miss it.

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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I keep loosening my grip and everything keeps getting easier and better

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I spent the absolute perfection of yesterday’s solstice evening sitting on the side-steps of the church at the edge of the garden with the organist, talking and eating shrimp tempura ramen bowls as the sun so very slowly set and the city passed by and it was the closest I’ve been to heaven in a very long time.

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learning that one of the biggest factors about whether or not people develop ptsd (or other severe mental health issues) after trauma isn’t necessarily the severity of what happened but the ways in which we received or didn’t receive support, compassion, and understanding in our communities and in our personal relationships following the trauma.. life changing

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only 5 seconds

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— Kristin Harmel, The Room on Rue Amélie

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