scraaaaaam - Tumblr blog

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I hate how people will look at popular indie artists who had one or two songs go viral on TikTok and start making fun of anybody who listens to them. "Oh you listen to Lemon Demon, Will Wood, Jack Stauber, Glass Animals, and Mother Mother? Tsk, don't you know that is stupid TikTok neurodivergent white transmasc preteen music? It's so mid and bad you should listen to real music–" you are a pit of misery

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talking to people while holding a beverage is awesome because you don't have to know what to do with your hands and when you don't know what to do with your face you can just take a sip

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unsung benefit i think a lot of ppl are sleeping on with using the public library is that i think its a great replacement for the dopamine hit some ppl get from online shopping. it kind of fills that niche of reserving something that you then get to anticipate the arrival of and enjoy when it arrives, but without like, the waste and the money.

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hell world!!!! hell world!!!! hell world!!!!

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i know that "unalive" is part of larger worrying trend of self censorship but if you really are in a situtation where you have to avoid the words "die" or "kill" the english language already has centuries worth of much better euphemisms. the iconic and perennial "six feet under"? the lovely imagery of "pushing up daisies"? "shuffle off this mortal coil"????? literally anything from the monty python dead parrot bit???? you have so many options. please try to be more creative at least

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The most annoying people ever: DNI if you ship Lucy with the ghoul. that’s immoral. How could you like that Bad Man? 😭

Lynda Carter:

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me, wrapping my arms around myself: i know it’s scary. i know. just keep being brave for a little while longer. i’m here with you.

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Any conspiracy theory about people going missing in National Parks is automatically silly to me. Like "Why are National Parks such a hotbed of disappearances???" because they're full of idiots. You've got thousands of people who've never pissed outdoors in their life wandering around the woods/desert/mountain with zero experience and zero gear and zero understanding that this place can kill them. You don't see as many disappearances in wild areas because people don't go to them unless they have some background knowledge. Whereas you get tour buses full of old folks and suburban families shuttling people into National Parks 365 days a year. If you took the same amount of buffoons and dropped them in the actual wilderness the disappearances would be significantly higher than at the parks. Use your brain.

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“can anyone hear me” and “its so dark in here” and “who said that” have got to be some of my fav things to say on a post because it brings to mind being locked in a room or lost in a cave, probably because of what youve said. not being called out in desperation, but in much calmer yet still resigned-to-your-fate way. in the case of “who said that” you’re saying something out the side of your mouth or under your breath, sometimes just fully out loud, then feigning bewilderment to whip around and look behind you. Sometimes in this case you’re in a vast and empty wheat field with no audience anyway. In all cases you’re definitely some sort of madman or loon or otherwise totally bonkers. just a glimpse into how my Posting Interpretation is.

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Costco has these artisanal peaches. My betrothed and I first had them while staying with some friends. They’re the platonic ideal of what an amazing peach should be. They’re peeled and preserved in juice whole, and somehow they taste slightly like vanilla.

When we got home from our visit we picked up a jar for ourselves. They lasted a good long while. We finally went to get more- and they were gone. I was devastated. That was two years ago.

Every Costco trip since then has included a hopeful look for the amazing peaches. I never stopped dreaming they’d come back.

My health has gotten better and with my improved energy I’ve finally been able to take over some of the chores. So when my betrothed lamented not having time for a Costco trip last week I volunteered to go alone.

I was meandering down the aisle and then I saw them. The peaches. The promised fruit I had been denied for two years, perfect and golden in that Costco aisle. Orchestral music swelled in my mind and everything around me faded away as I beelined toward them.

I was stricken with peach madness. I got four jars. Sitting in the car afterward I tallied the expense. The peaches were fully a quarter of the Costco bill. I texted my betrothed to apologize for absolutely losing my head. They reassured me over and over that it was a luxury I deserved to indulge and that it was okay.

Tonight while holding a dripping perfect peach in my hands, eating it while standing over the counter, each bite the exact ripeness to have a little give but not too much, and my mouth full of vanilla and peaches I contemplated going to buy more.

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My one friend group can't stop saying, "See you in hell!" in a cheerful voice instead of, "Talk to you later!" and my other friend group can't stop calling things "penis" instead of "cool" or "good", so I just unironically uttered the phrase, "Sounds penis, see you in hell," as I got off the phone.

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How I’ve been welcoming the new Fallout fans: