scriblan-blog

[scriblan-blog]

shout out to ace and aro kids who are constantly bombarded with the opinion that sex and romantic love are directly connected to living a happy life.

[scriblan-blog]

So am I just nowhere?

So I'm a heteroromatic demisexual and the LGBTQIAP+ community (both online and local) doesn't believe that I should be considered one of them and all my straight friends that understand sexual and romantic orientations say that I'm not 100% straight either. I never felt like I did what is considered a normal straight person does. I have the inability to feel sexual attraction toward men I think are attractive, but don't know nor connect with personally. I think Ryan Gosling is attractive (God bless), but I never really had a celebrity that I thought about fucking. At least in a serious way. I mostly joked about it to seem like I fit in. But I never really... felt sexual attraction toward strangers and rarely toward people I saw on the daily. Yet, that is not enough to make me queer. So am I just nowhere?

Furthermore, I'm mixed of multiple Asian ethnicities. Since society is slowly ("slowly" it seems at least from my experience in the multiple communities I grew up in California) becoming more comfortable with interracial marriages, the most you'll see from this generation is biracial/biethnic people. And mostly, those people are able to relate with one of the or both two races/ethnicities that make up them fairly easily. However, (I think this is the disadvantage of having Asian parents born in America, too) I'm triethnic(?). I'm Filipino, Chinese, and Laotian. My mom is mixed and my dad is pure Filipino. And they have the same grasp on their respective language and culture as any Asian born American (aka fairly basic to moderate amounts). But they mostly speak English. So here I am around friends that understand and even speak in the foreign language that their parents speak to them in. I barely know Tagalog and Lao and not a lick of Mandarin or Cantonese. And because of that I can't fully connect with people that are of one of the ethnicites that make me up, to most people of any race in America, I'm just some whitewashed Asian. But I'm not. I love whatever my multicultural home represents. But outside of family, I was never accepted into communities of one ethnicity because I was mixed and didn't know that basics of their language. I can only be Asian-American without the extensive list of what I actually am. And to non-Asians, I'm just Asian. But I'm alienated by the Asian communities. So am I just nowhere?

Am I just nothing in the grand scheme of things?

[scriblan-blog]

I feel weird id'ing as a heteroromantic demisexual cause like where do I belong? Will people accept me into LGBTQ+ or not?

Most likely. Look for trustworthy lgbt+ spaces that are known to interact with more than cis white gay people, and you should be set. You’ll run into a handful of assholes no matter where you go, but as time goes on, you’ll build up a rapport and a sense of self assurance. 

- Fae

[scriblan-blog]

i hope you’re all aware of the 300 recently discovered love letters between two gay british soldiers during ww2 that are going to be possibly adapted into a film.

they’re beautiful and poetic and tragic and heart-wrenching and brave. i highly suggest going and reading the excerpts. 

here’s the one that broke my heart:

“Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all our letters could be published in the future in a more enlightened time. Then all the world could see how in love we are.“

[scriblan-blog]