scrumptiousninjatidalwave-blog

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Back again

So it's been a while. That long in fact that I had to get a link as I forgot my logging in jargon. Well I'm back. I'm 37 now, and I'm still struggling with my fibro. I only have the one rat now. Poor Niffler fell in the cage and hurt his leg. It swelled up that much the vet said it would be risky to fix. So he was put to sleep. Demiguise is coping well, I thought he would have to be occupied and given attention all the time due to being alone, but he seems happy enough. A piggy when it comes to treats and left overs as he doesn't have to fight his brother for it. My ever faithful ginger cat 😻 is still going strong. He is never too far away and is definitely a lap cat. He can tell whether. I am feeling down and he comes for cuddles. The kids are growing too fast. My boy is now in year 11! Vehicle tech and bushcraft is his gift. And I wish him well in the future for using it. My middle child now 9, seems to think she knows all, and can boss all. Even to the point she back chats and argues with adults. My youngest now 5 is in year 1. She loves school, makes friends easily, isn't attached to any child in particular so that's helpful I guess, and she loves food, and is hungry all the time. And they all seem to be having growth spurts. My tattoo collection is growing. I now have Sir Didymus and a Firey on my arm, progressing up to a full sleeve.

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This looks awesome

Remember.

The Lion King (2019) dir. Jon Favreau

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Hair n nails done today. What a change, I feel so beautiful and sexy. All the grey and white has gone, now i can stand out.

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Must stay awake

Struggling to stay awake, been on the go all day. Fatigue is high today. Weighing up having a bath later just to refresh.

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Not defined

Ok, so here goes, another long but purposeful post. I’m typing like i talk so excuse the grammar. Im 36, soon to be 37 end of December, like literally the end. I’m married, happily, with 3 kids. I got my happy ever after eventually after going through some pretty tough n rough times. I wont confide cos who knows who is out there, and i’m not exactly everyone’s friend as i’m a bit different. I been through a lot of frogs n toads, and a couple of evil baddies, Disney expectations caused by watching fairy tales growing up. reality is different to the movies. I’ve got Fibromyalgia and EDS (joint hyper-mobility). Not a condition i would wish upon anyone, even my enemies. And i portray the Fibro as my enemy, living inside my body, taking up residency and not being a welcome visitor, in fact it has well and truly out stayed its welcome. Its a thief. Plain and simple. Its robbed me of so many things. I cannot walk far anymore i have to use a stick, or crutches. I’ve got one of those Rollator things you see elderly people using. Boy did i have trouble finding one that was tall enough, I’m 5 ft 7, and one that didn’t look like it belonged to my Nan who also uses one. I found one eventually, quite modern looking, but it didn’t stop the stares. I have a mobility scooter, so i can regain some independence and go to the local supermarket, parks by myself without having to have help. I’ve had to have adult social services come and kit my house out, extra hand rails on the stairs, perching stool for kitchen as i cant stand too long. a shower seat, which i still cant manage and a frame around my toilet.So its practical but its very much in your face. I mentioned I’ve got 3 kids. Now from their point of view this is a change that is going to take a lot to get used to. Mum can no longer chase after them and play, i can’t get down on the floor to play with my 4 yr old anymore. None of my kids can sit on my lap for long as the pain is unbearable. They need their comfort, but cant bear to see mummy in pain, let alone knowing that they could cause me pain unintentionally. My middle child is 8. She understands a bit better but i feel guilty as there is so much we cant do together, and she has seen the change of a healthy me to the fragile me. My youngest will grow up never knowing any different. my oldest, has Autism and Tourettes. Everything has always had to be broken down and explained factual and precise. its an adjustment. they feel helpless as there is nothing they can do to stop this happening. We have always had to plan outings and now we have to work out if it is accessible for me too. By law most places now are wheelchair accessible, if you don’t own one, they have ones you can use. And quite a few places like supermarkets and some National Trust places have mobile scooters that can be hired to use. Brilliant. My issue is the vulnerability i feel when i am out. Being in wheelchair puts you more or less level with peoples bottoms. It’s what i imagine being in a pushchair feels like for a toddler. Peoples shopping bags, cigarettes are all at that level. The stares, and the looks i get, I don’t want pity, i just want to be accepted for me. No i am not borrowing my Nans scooter to whizz to the shops. No i am not too lazy to walk. And surprisingly to some people, it is possible that people who use wheelchairs can walk, we are not giving up we are simply using the wheelchair as a tool so we can access places, and of course to save causing ourselves more pain and possible injury. So next time you see a younger person, some one under 50 using a mobility scooter or a walker, have a thought before you stare or say something rude or nasty. A smile will do. even a hello. I’ve had my scooter for a year and everytime i pass someone else in one, they will always smile and say hello. Its like a code. Bit like dog walkers talk to other dog walkers, and mums with babies talk to other mums. We get it. Phew this is long winded. And maybe a bit off course. But its in my head. I need to get it out. Its not just old people that have to use mobility scooters, walkers, walking sticks, rollators, etc. Its all ages. I guess i’m going through not a midlife crisis, but an identity crisis. If i catch a reflection of myself, i don’t see me, i see an old person. Its all down to stereotypes. i feel old beyond my years. my hair is going white against my dark brown hair. I’m not ready to be old and grey. I’m young still. I’m very excited to be getting a bright pink wheelchair! I couldn’t have said anything positive about my situation, it was all negative. i still have bad days, but a pink wheelchair means i don’t have to do anything to it to make it girly, away from the dull dark colours they usually come in. and it folds and goes in the boot of the car..i don’t drive. i look at my mobility scooter as my open top car lol. its even got a name, but thats another story. lol. I’m kind of trying to find myself, who i am, and so things are starting to get positive. I’m going to get my hair done, get rid of the grey and white, and have a nice ombre look. i’ve been getting my tattoos that I’ve always wanted. so far I’ve got my ghost busters, ludo from The Labyrinth with David Bowie, that’s going to be eventually a sleeve. And ive got my Galifreyan cartouche which my husband designed, he has a matching one. So i’m getting there. My old english teacher would have a field day, no pararaphs lol.but thats me, my thought of the day. over and out

 #housefairy81

#refinednotdefined #oldbeforemytime

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Morning peeps

So it's sunny and the squirrels have made their daily visit to rob my bird feeders. Won't stop them, they need food too. So have a bright day where ever you all are out there.

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Shop Avon with me today through my online store, and see all the latest products you love; Beauty, Skincare, Fragrance, Fashion, Home, and more!

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My new tattoo. Loved watching David bowie in the labyrinth growing up, and Ludo was my favourite. Start of a sleeve. More characters to follow.

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Shop Avon with me today through my online store, and see all the latest products you love; Beauty, Skincare, Fragrance, Fashion, Home, and more!

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this looks lush

Bacon Guacamole Grilled Cheese Sandwich

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10 days ive been an avon rep. its a new venture, i feel i can achieve something. Im not going to let my fibromyalgia stop me. You are welcome to visit my store if you are in the United Kingdom. www.avo.uk.com/store/Julies-Emporium

Ive been doing some online training too, from the comfort of my sofa in my slippers. #avon#comfyinslippers#