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UH OH

BREAKING UPDATE: The defense minister of the US, Videep, has mysteriously disappeared overnight. no one or thing has seen him and his whereabouts are still unclear. There is however news that the HOS sent 1 million spies to take out Videep, yet failed to get him before he disappeared.

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Chaos 2.0

Amid the uncertainty, something even more inexplicable has emerged. A strange message has been discovered—one that defies logic, language, and, perhaps, even human understanding. It was found simultaneously in multiple locations across different nations: deep within secure government servers, scribbled on scraps of paper in foreign embassies, embedded in radio static, and even carved into stone in remote regions. Experts are unable to determine its origin. Analysts working across multiple intelligence agencies confirm that the text contains symbols, patterns, and words that do not conform to any known language. Linguists claim it is structured yet alien in form. Decryption efforts have begun, but nobody knows who—or what—sent it. In response to the growing uncertainty and global crisis, world leaders have set aside past rivalries and formed a nation known as FRANK—an unprecedented alliance uniting former adversaries under one banner to address the mounting threats. Ministers from all member states are now working within their respective departments, attempting to determine the next course of action. Intelligence agencies are scrambling to interpret the strange message, military forces are on high alert, and top scientists have been mobilized to study the anomalies. For the first time in history, global leaders are not just preparing for war—but for the unknown. The world is at a crossroads. The laws of reality seem to be shifting, alliances are being redrawn, and something beyond comprehension has made its presence known. The question remains: Is humanity ready for what comes next?

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Chaos

A series of unexplained and deeply unsettling events have thrown the world into chaos. The 32 remaining American hostages in Tehran have vanished without a trace. There are no signs of forced entry, no sounds, no escape attempts, and no ransom notes. Just gone. Iranian guards stationed outside report nothing unusual—until they realized the room was empty. Surveillance cameras caught nothing—just static at the critical moments. Some reports mention a strange hum in the air before the disappearance. Others speak of a bright flash, then absolute silence. While initial accusations pointed to a U.S. extraction mission, the CIA, Pentagon, and White House have all denied involvement. Iranian intelligence is scrambling for answers, with growing whispers of "foreign intervention beyond our understanding." Meanwhile, in an equally baffling development, the Soviet invasion of Pakistan has come to an abrupt halt. Over 250,000 Soviet troops have withdrawn from their positions overnight. Entire Soviet bases in Pakistan are being abandoned—supplies, weapons, even vehicles left behind. Moscow has gone eerily silent. No official statements. No explanations. Just silence. Pakistani border units claim they picked up strange radio interference before the retreat. Others report strange aerial disturbances—objects moving at impossible speeds, seen but never truly there. As confusion grips the world, intelligence reports now suggest that both Iran and Iraq may have significantly expanded their nuclear capabilities. In Iran, anomalous activity has been detected at multiple classified facilities. Military assets are being moved in complete secrecy, and satellite imagery has picked up the transport of high-security cargo under extreme protection. Some reports—unverified but deeply concerning—suggest that Israel may have “misplaced” a number of nuclear warheads, and Iranian officials refuse to comment on the growing suspicions. At the same time, Iraq has been accelerating its own nuclear program, fueled by external funding and new technology. Leaks from within Iraq suggest nuclear contamination in rural areas, hinting at the scale and urgency of their development efforts. There are even rumors that the United States has played a hidden role in Iraq's nuclear advancement, though officials deny any involvement. The world is reeling. A group of high-profile hostages has simply disappeared. A war has been abandoned overnight. Two rival nations, once regional powers, now seem to be on the brink of nuclear capability. The balance of power in the Middle East is shifting in ways that no one can predict. Is there a rational explanation for what is happening? Or is the world on the brink of something far more terrifying? For now, nobody knows.

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Operation.. success?

Earlier today, a rescue operation was launched to free hostages held by Iranian forces. Helicopters were sent to carry out the mission, but on the way, three of them were shot down by Iranian border troops stationed near the northwest of Iran. Despite the setback, the remaining helicopters and operatives managed to successfully rescue 15 hostages. However, 32 hostages are still being held by Iranian forces, with their status currently unknown. The incident has heightened regional tensions, and efforts are ongoing through various channels to address the situation. Further updates will be provided as more information becomes available.

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Soviets doing soviet things

The Soviet Union has begun invading Pakistan, placing a blockade on the Karachi port, attempting to block aid. This comes as nearly 250k Soviet soldiers cross the soviet-pakistani border through Afghanistan. Casualties are high, as the terrain makes progress slow. China, who has been silent up to this point of the crisis, have stepped up to provide aid to Pakistan, preparing to mobilize the PLA in defense of the country. The Soviet Union also faces internal challenges. Having relied on the west for grain imports for the past decade, the invasion has caused widespread embargoes, limiting food supply on the Soviet mainland. Already living with limited supplies, Soviet civilians are beginning to feel the resurgence of great starvations akin to those under Stalin. Furthermore, already drained from their 2 year war with Afghanistan, the Soviet Union continues to struggle economy, as reliance on oil exports and the instability of the oil market has lead to an unstable economy. This comes as Saudi Arabia announces that they will freeze all Soviet assets and decrease oil prices, further harming Russian exports. They now emerge as a major oil manufacturer amid global rejection of Iraq

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The USSR has killed the Shah. Across Iran, civilians celebrate as justice seems to have finally been dealt after years of oppression. However, this leaves the question: what role do the hostages play now that the shah has been killed?

Hours after the leak, Brezhnev’s food taster collapsed from botulinum poisoning inside a Saudi restaurant in Moscow. However, upon reading local reviews, many locals claim that the food does not taste too authentic. Soviet officials were quick to blame Saudi, but fresh evidence suggests a different player in the shadows.

The discovery comes as the US quietly withdraws troops from Iraq, redeploying forces into Turkey under a secret NATO defense pact—placing American soldiers within striking distance of Soviet borders. Several of these troops have also relocated to Saudi Arabia and no US troops are present in Iraq.

Meanwhile, naval peace in the Gulf stalls, as well as an increase in US movement, caused Iran to mobilize its impressive navy: 4 frigates and 2 destroyers. In a truly David vs Goliath-esque standoff, Iran seems to have its back against a wall, this time without a slingshot to defend with. Unlike the biblical tale, it seems like this situation looks quite dire. Through Saudi ports, US ships have launched an attack on 2/6 of the ships of the Iranian navy. Exact damages are unclear.

As alliances shift and hidden hands manipulate the board, the crisis spirals deeper into a labyrinth of betrayals. With no one trusting their own allies, the next act of violence may come from any corner of the map—and no one will know who’s really behind it.

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US doing US things

In what was supposed to be a brilliant power move, the US has been secretly training Iranian militias in elite guerrilla warfare tactics. The problem? The trainers forgot they were in a different country and acted like it was 1950s Alabama.

See, instead of focusing on covert ops and military strategy, the US officers apparently spent way too much time reminding the fighters that they were "less civilized" and "lucky to be trained by superior minds." At one point, a US instructor allegedly referred to an Iranian fighter as "a sand farmer".

The recruits, who were literally being trained to overthrow governments, quickly realized that they hated their US trainers more than any foreign enemy. The result? A full-blown armed revolt.

Somewhere in Washington, an advisor is frantically flipping through a history book, muttering, "Has colonialism ever worked? No? Okay, maybe we should stop doing this."

Meanwhile, an important shipment of military equipment has mysteriously vanished. No one knows where it was going, no one knows who arranged it, but everyone now knows who has it: The Patriotic Union of Kurdistan (PUK).

And then we have what might be the most embarrassing Soviet intelligence failure since… well, yesterday.

Determined to rescue American hostages before the U.S. could, a group of Soviet operatives disguised themselves as Iranian civilians and attempted to infiltrate Tehran. The plan? Blend in, get inside the compound, and walk out with the captives like it was just another Tuesday.

There was only one small issue, they learned the wrong language.

Instead of flawless Persian, the Soviet agents arrived speaking something completely different, possibly Pashto, Uzbek, or something they made up on the spot. When locals asked basic questions, the undercover agents responded with the enthusiasm of a tourist who thinks shouting random syllables will make them understood.

To absolutely no one’s surprise, they were immediately arrested.

And now, in one of the most unintentionally hilarious developments of this entire crisis, a group of Soviet spies is being held hostage right next to the Americans they were trying to save. The Switzerland conference exchanging the shah for hostages has hit a road bump. En transit through the alps, the shah's transport was infiltrated by a group of operatives posed as tourists. Who are they? We do not know.

In the wake of the chaos, witnesses claimed to have seen the shah brandish a pair Smith & Wesson Model 39, showcasing a surprising suppleness and agility for a man of his age.

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Iraq Gets a Bad Review… from the Sky

Something strange is in the air. Reports confirm that Iraqi military planes have been conducting frequent mystery flyovers, but instead of bombs, they are raining down thousands of anti-Iraq propaganda leaflets. Who wrote them? Who printed them? And most importantly, who thought this was a good idea?

The contents of these posters remain classified, but sources claim they contain not-so-flattering statements about the Iraqi government, with rumors of bad poetry, questionable illustrations, and an excessive use of capital letters. Iraqi officials are scrambling to figure out who exactly is behind this airborne PR disaster—is it an inside job, foreign meddling, or did someone in Baghdad just really upset the printing industry? As if leaflet bombs and surprise passengers weren’t enough, the same aircraft have also been dropping large amounts of water over key areas along the border. Theories range from an attempt to “refresh” desert conditions to experimental weather control, while others suspect this may be a highly unconventional way to test Iraq’s patience. It's clear that nobody knows what is happening.

Amid the chaos, US transport planes flying in the Middle East were attacked and shot down over deserts in Northern Iraq. A communication from the Patriotic Union of Kurdistan claims that Kurdist have "taken down the great metal birds of the west" as they pursue their mission for Kurdist Independence.

Finally, in a shocking display of diplomacy, The United States and Iran have reached an agreement. In exchange for the release of 5 hostages, the US government will return the Shah to face his crimes in Iran. The exchange will occur on neutral soil, with both parties agreeing to meet in Switzerland to negotiate further terms. However, there are increasing concerns that the hostages are in increasingly dangerous conditions. However, public response in Iran has improved, especially with information that justice will be dealt.

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Iranian Unity FRACTURED

Following a series of negotiations between Iran and other international actors, conservative members, especially amongst the religious clergy, are beginning to question the Ayatollah’s dedication to creating an Iran independent from the west. Many, including the student group that currently holds the hostages, are beginning to become disgruntled over the lack of justice for Iran and persecution of the shah.

Across the world, stagnation of international trade due to the actions of major actors, protectionist policies, and the instability of the oil has many economic experts predicting a global economic crisis in the coming months. What was originally a crisis risking the lives of 52 Americans now has the potential to destroy the economic systems that define our world.

Lastly, in a rare act of kindness in these tumultuous times, the UN has made progressive policy changes to it’s structure, Due to a concern for President Carter’s temporary decline in health, The UN has now implemented disability policies.

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Egyptian officials have released information on an Iraqi-US armed envoy en route from the west through the Suez canal. This envoy is heavily defended by Iraqi destroyers and accompanied by US air presence.

Meanwhile, in Iran, the economy has reached a complete halt. While the Ayatollah remains popular, Iranian civilians are beginning to feel the impact of economic policies from around the world. Due to a lack of imports, food is limited.

Reports from the Red Cross have mentioned rumors of nuclear poisoning from Iraq. The impact seems to be small, but it is unclear where this comes from or who has been most affected due to the lack of access to Iraqi lands at this time. Nuclear contamination at this time occurs at the height of nuclear paranoia, leading to many civilians demanding action from the Iraqi government.

Nikolai Tikhonov has been placed as the new foreign minister of the USSR, a close ally of Brezhnev, he is a long-awaited appointment following years of loyal service to the Politburo.

Finally, as negotiations continue, protests have erupted in major cities across the US following a perceived lack of progress in freeing the hostages. This follows trends seen from across the world, as leaks of transcripts of negotiations between world leaders have led to the labeling of the UN as a" fool's organization where old men feed their egos". The person behind the leak is currently unidentified.

Amid the turmoil, independent news outlets have hailed Saudi as the diplomatic solution. Delegates, how will you respond now that your people are beginning to turn against you?

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Fractured from Within: Rebels, Sanctions, and the Crumbling Iranian Crisis

A major intelligence report has overturned Iran’s claim that a Saudi national was behind the downing of an Iranian helicopter. Investigations by Pakistan, France, Turkey, and Iraq confirm the attack was carried out by a radical Shia rebel group composed of Iranian nationals. Their motive? To prevent the release of five American hostages, believing any negotiation with the U.S. was a betrayal.

This revelation raises serious questions: Was Iran’s leadership aware of this group, or is the revolutionary government losing control? And why did Iran immediately blame Saudi Arabia—an intelligence failure or political maneuvering?

Reports from within the Soviet Union reveal an influx of rocket launches form the USSR. It is unclear what the motive is. All across the world, security is increasing. Embassy are tightening security and diplomacy has reached a standstill. Whispers of troop movements are being heard in rural villages near the Iraq-Iran border.

Meanwhile, Iran’s economy is collapsing under U.S.-led financial sanctions. With frozen assets, oil bans, and a plunging rial, Tehran is facing growing unrest at home. The U.S. has doubled down, calling for multilateral sanctions, while military tensions rise along the Iran-Iraq border, where Iraqi forces continue testing Iranian defenses.

With internal instability, economic collapse, and regional threats mounting, Iran is running out of options.

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Crisis Extra Crispy: The Great KFC Standoff

What started as a hostage crisis has now escalated into something far more ridiculous—and potentially catastrophic.

In a bizarre yet deeply troubling development, U.S. military forces in Iraq have been spotted conducting what intelligence sources are calling “Operation Extra Crispy.” The reason? Apparently, the Ayatollah’s obsession with tasting Kentucky Fried Chicken has reached dangerous new levels.

Reports from inside the U.S. Embassy in Tehran suggest that the Iranian hostage-takers have upped their demands, now insisting that the United States not only return the Shah but also deliver 500 buckets of KFC to the embassy as a sign of goodwill. One hostage claims their captors have been repeatedly whispering “Finger-lickin’ jihad” under their breath.

Meanwhile, Saudi Arabia, eager to assert itself diplomatically, attempted to establish a foreign mediation agency to resolve the crisis. Unfortunately, the plan fell apart almost immediately when officials couldn’t decide on a name and ended up embroiled in a 12-hour shouting match over whether “The Supreme Council for Global Stability and Chicken Procurement” sounded too aggressive.

As for Iraq, Saddam Hussein is now claiming credit for the entire crisis, declaring that it is “proof of American weakness” and, for some reason, “evidence that falafel is superior to fried chicken.” In response, KFC headquarters in Kentucky has released a statement saying that while they do not take sides in international conflicts, they would “absolutely love to expand into the Middle Eastern market.”

Back in Washington, President Carter is in full panic mode. Having exhausted all rational diplomatic options, White House staff say he was last seen in the Situation Room staring at a KFC menu and mumbling, ‘Do they even have these ingredients in Iran?’ Some advisors have suggested sending a “symbolic” three-piece meal as a peace offering, while others fear that this might be seen as an act of war.

And just when you thought things couldn’t get worse, the Soviet Union has now publicly denounced “Western fast food imperialism” and accused the U.S. of attempting to destabilize Iran through “deep-fried psychological warfare.” Moscow has even hinted at sending communist-approved, Soviet-style fried chicken to counteract American influence—though no one is entirely sure what that means, and everyone is deeply afraid.

Local Newspapers in Mexico have reeported an influx of arab immigrants working with local cartel networks. However, it ic unclear who they are and their objective.

Finally, an alarming development: As it was taking off, an Iranian helicopter was shot by a missile. according to Iranian reports, the shooter is identified as abdullah sayyeed, a saudi passport holder. Other soureces have yet to corroborate this info.

So, delegates, we now face several pressing questions:

Will Iran get its KFC?

Will Carter cave to poultry-based diplomacy?

Will Saudi Arabia ever successfully name a foreign agency?

Or is this the moment when global tensions explode—not over politics, but over fried chicken?

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Iran Hostage Crisis

Honourable ministers, the date is November 4th, 1979.

The streets of Tehran are in utter chaos.

Earlier this morning, a group of Iranian students stormed the U.S. Embassy, taking over 60 American diplomats and staff hostage. The attackers claim to be acting in the name of the Islamic Revolution, denouncing U.S. interference in Iran and demanding the extradition of the exiled Shah, Mohammad Reza Pahlavi — currently receiving medical treatment in the United States.

The Iranian government, led by Prime Minister Mehdi Bazargan, appears to have lost control of the situation. Protestors are gathering by the thousands outside the embassy, chanting in support of Ayatollah Khomeini. However, there are whispers that not everyone in the new government approves of the siege, perhaps cracks are beginning to show within the fragile revolutionary regime.

The United States has yet to issue an official response — but tensions are high, and the world is watching.

Will diplomacy prevail? Will the revolution devour itself from within? Or are we standing on the edge of something much darker?

The floor is now open for directives.