seatanya-blog

[seatanya-blog]

And soar to heights they could never dream.

Grow from the dirt that they left you in

[seatanya-blog]

Day 4: Freeze

In my own tracks

I'm a statue

On exhibit to everyone

All cracks

All scratch

All stains

No cap

I feel exposed froze

Cause you see the picture clearer in still

Than you do in motion

Cause you hear your mind speak louder in still

Than you do in motion

Cause you feel all the cuts deeper in still

Than when in motion

I wish I could put my frozen heart

On a watch

To buy time

To undo the effects of being still in the snow for so long

We need to get the blood circulation back up

No more ice picks crippling my blood's vein

No more stagnant

We're moving forward

With or without a gang

Saetanya D'Evil

[seatanya-blog]

Day 3: Bait

I can't swim but I'm in way too deep

Couldn't afford my freedom to run off the leash

Without me at least

I've been waiting 1.8 years for this day

Nothing will have me desist and cease

I hope by swallowing this bait I don't decease

Cause where I'm going

There'll be no coming back when I leave

If i fall

If I freeze

If I bleed

Every drop

Every chill

Every injury

Will be worth it

The self appointed jury

Is the one and only who can set me free

My throat is wide for the bait

There will be no de bait

I am who and I am me today

Always

Seatanya D'Evil

[seatanya-blog]

Day 2: Mindless

Back when the mind was spotless

I wish I spent a lot less

Time undermining the prospects

Because the echoes off my nest screamed

that I'll make no progress

I was mindless cause I was chicken

I feared the flight of the risen

Running around from people

Feeding me the notion of freedom in prison

I was an audience to the thoughts

Applauding my demise

Autopilot encore

All backstage to this smile

But now that I think I've cried

Now that I think I've died

CTs couldn't help

So I had to revive my mind

Saetanya D'Evil

[seatanya-blog]

Day 1:Ring

Spinning about the commitment at hand

About how it had to end before it started

But what it sparked

It, lit the way for men of a thousand

And before I give this and everything to a woman outside of my flesh

I'd make this vow to align and enmesh

With where I'm going and where I'm at

So when I walk down the isle

I can give my whole

Instead of pieces of myself

So for the sake of not the hypothetical her

I say I do to myself

In sickness and in health

Saetanya D'evil

[seatanya-blog]

Sadly Birthday To Me

Presence in the sunlight decline with time

Must be the essence

Last time, before I blue the candles out

I made a death wish

And all I saw was black

When my mother's mother had passed

I was angry in the mirror reflecting my past

Dropped the gavel on my head

For not feeling everybody's feelings

Felt like her grave was on shoulder

Like I took the place of her cancer

Because I didn't forgive her for her numerous crimes of passion

That made my soul divorce my body

Why should I forgive the unapologetic

But fast forward past the blank day in August for 2018

And for August 2019

But this blank day hits close to home

Cause I looked forward to my departure from the nest

But then I never had nest

All I got was cold worms

My toss and turn made me late

But I could find that on any ground

Emancipation is closer

And in the shackles my ankles feel fatter

Tired of being on my feet

And still being invisible to my maternal massa

Cheers to the day I was born to die

Happy Annual Death Sentence !

-Saetanya D'Evil

[seatanya-blog]

So,what do I know about me?

Well, I've been learning a lot of things during my journey of self discovery. I'm learning that some of the identities I possess don't necessarily define "me" but rather serve as an explanation for some of the experiences I've had in this life. It could be argued that by extension my experiences do aid my character making my identities apart of who I am as person. However, that's not how define "me", I am defined by character traits because I feel that if I was in an alternate world where I was straight I'd still be the same loud mouth "sell me a caramel frap" waste gyal that I am today. These things are just files for the experiences experiences that make "me", me. So here's what I've learnt so far:

I like girls who like girls cause I'm a girl who likes girls. In other words I'm a lesbian aka sapphic aka sadamite aka gladamite aka battygyal aka gay aka homosexual aka dyke aka bulldagger aka female fish. I'm a proud lesbian who is exploring this recent but not so recent self discovery. Tell my wife to shoot her shot when she sees me.

Ice cream with a texture or a chew to it automatically has my undivided attention. I don't really fancy smooth ice cream. Don't have a favorite flavor but any ice cream that have a crunch to it like cookies and cream, Rocky road, chocolate etc have my devoted worship any day.

Football is a beautiful game and Manchester United is the source of this beauty. That's it, that's the statement

Oh yeah, how dis manage slip my mind. I'm honored to be a black woman. My African heritage has taught me great strength and made me wealthy with culture. Sending love to my ancestors from the industrialized shoreline.

Whoever made cheesecake in all it's flavors deserve a Nobel Peace prize for their groundbreaking contributions to the baking world.

I have hobbies outside of my passions that I'm striving to do more of this year. More baking, more drawing and more life for the 99 to the 2000s.

My pen is the veins of my arm that flow onto paper. Writing is oxygen. I'll be sharing this oxygen with whoever sees this blog in the form of poems and small expository rants about anything on this spinning piece of rock that pisses me off. You name it, I write it, from sounds to pictures to emotions. But I'm not dropping chunes here cause I refuse to allow SoundCloud suburbians to bite my poetic rythymns and eat off my talent

Some day hoping to buy a volcano so the lava can cool so I can get cool crystals to meditate with. Yes, I'm a non pacifist hippie so talk shit and get hit with a yoga mat, nigga. This is a last resort though cause I'd rather communicate and settle things maturely but if it boils down to a Fight Club scene then pull up bro. But yes, again this is a more informal of saying I'm a spiritualist and an astrology junkie that talks like a child who just got some sweeties. Thanks to my Sagiterrorist moon for this :)

Sometime, later on in the future, I'll pay my bills by recording my raps and making movies. To make money from my informal means of creative therapy is the occupation I aspire to.

Politics is for the people and I am of and for the people. I'm for the overlooked people that are the monkeys between loud but wrong voices who don't truly care for them but care for their image. I am one of the monkeys in the middle and we're suffering from the silence of loud noises and media spectacle that reiterate their narrative instead of our stories. As long as I'm alive I'll contribute a block towards the wall of protection for black people, women and aligned people, trans people, gay people, poor people and people of the Global South. Praying for a day where people don't have to suffer abuse for a dollar in order to survive, where people wouldn't risk their health to make a decision regarding their bodies, pray that we destroy the prisons that put the vunerable to slavery and erase imaginary boards on the map.

Ah inna di lates, gonna watch YouTube now :)

[seatanya-blog]

Who the fuck are you? What is this Saetan shit?

I have absolutely no idea, that's why I'm creating myself with the little I know of myself. Growing up people usually have parents to water them and feed them the courage to branch off into themselves- my old folks where different. They only aged but didn't mature. My sperm donor was an ex convict that got deported from America at 30 something and my egg donor breathed fresh air without my grandma's nostrils down her neck at 19 for the 1st time. The two, as a couple, decided to take his new found government funded and US state mandated emergency permanent vacation to the island and her new found adulthood to scramble eggs with a dash of sperms on a December night. Nine months later on August 27,2001 I manifested into this big Dovecot called life at 12noon weighing around 9 pounds. My egg donor talks about the C-section she did so often that I feel like I'm about to have C-section between my ears and head. The sperm donor puts a whole different meaning behind that "imma head out" meme when he went ghost on me at 3 months. Ever since then for the pass 18 years I've been living a life of spiritual homicide. This page is an attempt to reincarnate myself into the most despised hero of our time: The Devil. I present to you, Seatanya D'evil: The Teller of the Untold Story of the Other Side. As Seatanya, I aim to to create H.E.L.L- Happiness Exudes Limitless Love. This is the ideal home for members of society who at some point in history have been dehumanized and judged by orthodox religion and sentenced to H.E.L.L. Located below the crust of earth, is a space in which all those prosecuted against can celebrate their resilience and become humanized. My point of duty is to tell our side of the story through my pen, my camera and my vocals. If you read this far, then welcome and thank you. Go pree my next post if you want to know more about me :)