sebastiansmythehq-moved

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

you really started to lose me for a moment, but the wine really saved you. welcome to psu, it's mediocre at best, but most people seem to be enjoying themselves and i'm sure you'll find yourself among them. good luck on the turning 30 front, that was me last year and it was not kind to me.

Hello my gays & theys, I'm now here to grace you with my presence on this site. I know, I know. You're welcome. You were probably wondering when The Addie St. James was going to show up, weren't you?

Sorry. That's ridiculous, but what better way to hype yourself up, am I right? Anyway, like it says up there - Addie St. James. You might know me from being the Surfing coach at PSU, or you might know me from seeing me ride some sick waves every now and then. (Every now and then, more like always, but whatever.) I'm 29, turning 30 in two weeks (this is just so everyone knows my birthday is soon, thanks). She/Her. Lesbian as fuck. I like the beach, general tso's chicken and red wine. If you want to make me happy, you'll give me any of those things. Or just be a pretty girl. It's pretty easy to make me happy, actually.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

i'm really proud of you for embracing your inner white girl and imposing your birthday on everyone you know for an extended period of time to wear them down emotionally until you obtain your ultimate goal - world domination. so congrats on that. and happy birthday - in nine days.

It's August first, which means it's day one of my birthday, yeah you heard that right. I'm spending the next nine days. So as your birthday gift to me, leave your suggestions for what shit I should do for the next eight days. Maybe make a few of them family friendly, so my kid can come.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

miss rose, i was just trying to show you i was your biggest fan, you didn't have to put me on blast. next time i'll just video tape you from a far in a very conspicuous way like your other fans, how's that?

you're a joy to watch perform, i'll be there if i can.

sometimes i get recognized in public and it goes very normally - the people are sweet, maybe they've bought or streamed my EP, maybe we take a picture. this isn't super frequent, but it's enjoyable when it happens, right? i'm putting my music out there, it's inevitable that i'm going to attract attention at some point. BUT then there's today. i was today years old when i was recognized by a guy and he asked me to write my name on his thigh. yup. i was as nice as possible but i did decline and offered to sign his phone case instead. guys...please leave your body parts out of our meetings, i beg. in other news, i do have a show this friday once again at the tin angel, tickets are complimentary when you eat dinner there, so reserve your spot because they will go quickly!

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

no no, you're totally right, cheating on someone eight years into a marriage is totally valid and everyone should do it. i'm a sure you know all about having a cheating partner. or are you the cheater in your relationships since you're full of excuses for them?

People usually have some sort of reason why they cheat: they're not being satisfied at home, lack of communication, they're married to a prick, etc. Did you ask him why he did it?

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

actually i got divorced because my husband is a cheater, but that was very cool of you to make wild assumptions.

I see why you got divorced.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

see, i think you're being facetious, but in a town like this, you could be being completely serious and that's what scares me.

Wow, I wonder where in all of LA will there be a bookstore? I hope you do solve this captivating mystery.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

in monetary value. it's called getting divorced. don't hurt yourself.

Half a marriage?

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

has no one around here ever picked up a book? so you're new? what's your story? you look a little old to be fresh off a high school graduation..

That feels like a reference of some kind and I ain't sure what. But... glad you ain't dead? Despite technically being in the incoming class I really don't know what you can expect, but I hope you get the tea you're lookin for.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

good to know. and if i have a motorcycle i needed fixing...you could do that? look under the hood, so to speak?

I'm pretty sure there's a decent bookstore at the end of Sycamore Lane - I got a repair manual for the Triumph Bonneville motorcycle from there. It was crowded that Saturday I went, so popular.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

i could put you in touch with someone from my production company - yeah I got half of that in the divorce. seriously, write a proposal and i'll see what i can do.

no one could ever impress me, but thankfully i mostly handing legalities, i'm the in-house lawyer.

Well, well, well... welcome back from the dead Sebastian. Care to throw a little bit of your riches my way so I can produce even better content? Maybe I'll even plug your face as the sponsor. Make stickers and everything. But, for real. It's a damn good thing that I'm not a freshman trying to impress you in the admissions office.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

i may be god's biggest disappointment, but i do know my 2000s romcoms, thanks you of course. how're you doing, mads?

Awww, Sebby. Quoting 13 Going on 30? I knew there was a reason you're my favorite. Other than being the best big brother, of course.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

you know i hate when i'm out of the loop, miss rose. we will have to fix that right away. and i think a private show is in order, don't you?

i'd love to, we have a lot to catch up on. there's so much i haven't told you yet. also i just had a show!! hate that you couldn't make it, but we'll have to remedy that as well, right?

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

i suppose you have a point there. welcome to the dark side, the queers have more fun.

I don't think the sanctity of marriage matters as much when you're not into women in the first place. If it weren't for my family, I likely never would've married her.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

to fight physically? or to insult customers? either way i'm intrigued, i need to see it in action.

Literary Edge bookstore. Three blocks from campus, kitty-corner to the Dairy Queen. Just know that the employees have explicit permission to fight, so watch yourself.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

well for some people i suppose a public divorce is basically death, i've never much cared about what other people think of me though. if they want me dead, it's fan behavior honestly.

maybe you'll have to give me the official bookstore tour?

Damn. That has to feel good. To know you've made it to the point where you've got death rumors circling about you. That's pretty badass.

Congrats on the divorce, though, I guess? If you're happy about that, though. I can't really tell you any tea, but I can tell you about the bookstores around here. I know most of 'em like the back of my hand.

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

how old is the kid? i don't know how you do it, i love my quiet time way too much for that. all things considered, i'm better than ever.

i'm good, it's just more of the usual for me. class, hanging out with my kid, trying to write when i have a free moment, you know me. how about you, all things considered?

[sebastiansmythehq-moved]

ah, so you're a cheater. you and my ex would get along great, the sanctity of marriage means nothing to you. i didn't get a prenup, but i have a good lawyer.

Better than getting caught in the act by your wife. If we're talking who won the divorce then I'd have to give it to myself as well - but she wasn't very smart and never got a prenup.