secondrategerman-blog

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“Yes I come into your home with my vegetables, we need to get this fixed.”

Hugs are to be had right back! There’s a reason why it was so big he was probably going to eat most of it. He was so ready to eat handfuls of cabbage at this point. But that was neither here or there, dinner was on him!

CONGRATS ON THE GETTING BETTER OF LIFE but heres Seigfried to fuckin put down a giant ass bowl of salad for dinner for you because he hasnt seen Mattie eat a vegetable in three weeks

@secondrategerman

Excuse you, he’s been eating well enough! And you haven’t been home in three weeks. You need it far more than he does!

“You come into my home-” He’s joking, but he’s also going to hug you because he’s missed you ya big lug!

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Sleeping?? Great!!

Sleeping 18 hours and waking up in the mid afternoon?? ... Not so great.

Drowsiness still clings to him, but there’s things to do! Like.. eating, that’s a good start, right?

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I think it's less a matter of appreciating the smaller things, and more the fact that, well, his heart is becoming black as coal. Once upon a time he was pouty about Valentine's day, and now he loathes it. He looks at people around him and he hates them, because they all have something that has scorned him so badly in the past. He drinks to forget the misery, but the misery just hits once more when he sobers up. He's admitted it to us anons in the past quite a few times.

Siegfried stares at this slip of paper in his hands for what seems like five years, eyes blinking unevenly as he was still trying to process it three more times. Who let him sleep in till 3 in the afternoon anyway.

“... Who he? Mattie? Well, yea, he’s depressed and angry about life. It’s depressing in his own way to see him sink so low but.. well, nothing I do helps. Last time I saw him genuinely smile while sober was shooting off a machine gun. It’s... a far cry from when we first met.Of course, I make it just as worse honestly, whether being here or on the other side my influences still poison him. Luciano’s been helping me process the guilt but ya know, I try to help when I can but... well, people change I guess. Doesn’t change him from being my best friend though.”

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Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Nope, it's Mattie, here to tackle hug you.

HIS ARMS ARE OPEN AND READY.

HES READY TO BRACE FOR IMPACT!!!

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... Or maybe Volker was being normal. He had no idea at this point, but he came over to want to invite him out but looks like it’d be an indoor day.

“Sure, I can. ... Are you okay?”

Best address the elephant in the room before he commits to anything too crazy, like being a house guest for a possible drunkard. Not that he couldn’t handle that of course.

You know who hasn't been around the neighborhood for a while? Siegfried. You know who's excitedly knocking at your door right now? You guess it; also Siegfried.

Luckily, Volker was on his way back to the couch from one of his occasional trips to the bathroom and happened to be near enough to the door to chance seeing who might be there. Unluckily for whoever might be on the other side of the door, he was wearing the pajamas Annie had bought for him years ago in the hopes of getting him to wear something to bed, and the too-big flamingo-island-themed plaid clashed horribly with both the stunningly blue sling he’d upgraded to wearing, and his currently slightly loopy mental state that the recent ingestion of morphine had unleashed upon the world.

Regardless, help was not called for, and the door was opened. So to was Volker’s mouth, and the direct line to the first thing that popped into his head.

“Din’n you die inna fire?” He slurred. What a welcome.

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“.... What?”

He thought the smoke had gotten off him by that point, though his smell might not have been what caused that line. ... Maybe. What the hell wa she wearing- That didn’t matter.

“I’m... not interrupting anything, am I?” For all he knew this was something of being caught mid-nookie or having just slammed a lot of alcohol.

You know who hasn't been around the neighborhood for a while? Siegfried. You know who's excitedly knocking at your door right now? You guess it; also Siegfried.

Luckily, Volker was on his way back to the couch from one of his occasional trips to the bathroom and happened to be near enough to the door to chance seeing who might be there. Unluckily for whoever might be on the other side of the door, he was wearing the pajamas Annie had bought for him years ago in the hopes of getting him to wear something to bed, and the too-big flamingo-island-themed plaid clashed horribly with both the stunningly blue sling he’d upgraded to wearing, and his currently slightly loopy mental state that the recent ingestion of morphine had unleashed upon the world.

Regardless, help was not called for, and the door was opened. So to was Volker’s mouth, and the direct line to the first thing that popped into his head.

“Din’n you die inna fire?” He slurred. What a welcome.

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okay whatever but weren't you just travelling with him before you dissappeared? that didn't seem to help him much back then

No, we went to my home and he worked with me. That wasn’t leisure in the slightest.

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you know, I doubt it's just a matter of traveling that's going to help him.

What, you think sitting here would be any better? Something is better than nothing. He doesn’t even have to travel, he just needs to appreciate the smaller things.

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Of course. *The phrase ‘you’d do the same for me wanted to come up, but that was a thought he wasn’t so sure would true. Granted, he has his own problems. He crossed his other arm over to squeeze him for a hug.*

If you find any sort of fun adventure that you want company in, I literally have nothing else to do to keep me from it.

Mattie? Can we talk?

@secondrategerman

*He’s chilling on his couch at the moment with a coffee*

Oh, hey Sigi! Yeah, ‘sup?

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Well, of course. Ruts are never simple.

*He moved over in the coach, reaching out an arm to wrap around Mattie’s slimmer shoulders.*

I’ve told you about my fair share with it here, or even before I came to this world. I mean... ja, nothing really matters when you look at the big picture. It’s the same old stuff, people being cruel, nothing ever being finished that’s really worth while. That’s just how life is. 80 years can go by in a flash with nothing interesting being done in any of it.

You might be self-loathing and hating to the world but that’s just an empty way to live. Looking at the big picture of life is boring and depressing. I would say live for the now but you partying it up still seems to just make you sad. When’s the last time you went hiking to see a waterfall? Have you ever gone snow skiing? Or snow boarding? When was the last time you took a pleasure vacation on a whim? Or the last time you took one that was so expensive you had to save up for months? Maybe even years? 

You might think what’s the point of that but that’s the beauty of it. Nothing matters. Why not use that time to see things not many have seen? To experience wind in your face and sweet tastes in your cheeks? Experiencing small bouts of happiness instead of wallowing in existential despair has its merits.

Mattie? Can we talk?

@secondrategerman

*He’s chilling on his couch at the moment with a coffee*

Oh, hey Sigi! Yeah, ‘sup?

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That’s still not healthy. I mean, my kind do it but it’s because we’re immortal and can get away with it. You though, you’re human. I would say this would kill you but you have enough brushes with death as is. I think you need something else. You might be stuck in a rut or something.

Mattie? Can we talk?

@secondrategerman

*He’s chilling on his couch at the moment with a coffee*

Oh, hey Sigi! Yeah, ‘sup?

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*How the heck could he even bring up this conversation? There was a lot that was hanging on his mind. He had been keeping to the background for the most part but.. he had to come out and say something eventually. He went over and sat down on the couch next to him.*

... I would ask are you okay, but you’d probably be like “oh yea, super fine”. ... I’ve been noticing a lot more bottles than usual in your room and you tearing some things out. ... Don’t think I haven’t smelled what you’ve been eating either. So when I ask this, please just be honest with me.

Are you okay?

Mattie? Can we talk?

@secondrategerman

*He’s chilling on his couch at the moment with a coffee*

Oh, hey Sigi! Yeah, ‘sup?

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... So what’d I miss?

*licklicklick*

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*.... just slowly passes Mattie one of his ales before grabbing one of his own and downing it.

what the fuck*

what would you do if my some strange forces of the universe you got pregnant with seigfrieds child mattie

No.God No. Fuck that. No.

*and on goes the anti-anon headphones*

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This is his third Christmas here but he is still fighting the urge to barricade the house from saint nick.

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*.... Oh dear, that was a bit sudden, but he probably did her a frighten of being a stranger. Welp, best to carry on anyway. He followed after her and just knocked on the door. Least Annie would probably clear things up.*

Vati! Vati, I found slugs!

*… He’s going to take a second to look around before pointing to himself. While he did come over to visit to see how Annie was doing and possibly see the new addition to the family, he didn’t think he’d be meeting the kid.. especially like this. It was like how he met Annie all over again, fitting. He gave a warm smile down to her regardless.*

Good job, though I’m not Volker.

*It’d be rude to pretend to be her dad, best just be honest up front.*