selfloathingextraordinaire
selfloathingextraordinaire
Reblog Kitty
2K posts
This is @bobokitty's side blog.
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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glam metal modern but also your contractor is going to jail dawg
Sometimes a house is so ugly, disgust boomerangs back into a form of respect.
This is a rare phenomenon, one which should be treated seriously. I've been looking at ugly houses professionally for almost a decade now and I can say with confidence that there are only a handful of true goose eggs that meet the mark. This house -- this remarkable, revolting house -- located, of all places, in Randolph County, North Carolina, is perhaps the finest goose egg a rogue and most certainly confused contractor could possibly lay.
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Yeehaw, man. For the curious, the house is on the market for over 500 grand despite being badly sited and measly 2600 square feet. Most of that is devoted to the lawyer foyer which is not the choice I would personally make, but hey, to each their own.
Most of the houses on McMansion Hell these days are submissions from members of the McMansion Hell Patreon, either in our discord server or on our livestreams. This one, however was a total fluke. I came across it by accident because my brother is looking to move to the area in order to be closer to my folks. (I doubt he'd be interested in something this, uh, unique.)
Now, in all these years, I've never devoted an entire post to the exterior of a house. As they say, there's a first time for everything. There is so much going on with this house, all of it in direct opposition to the concept of taste, it requires a deeper investigation than the initial exterior image usually allows. (Also the entire interior is, as one might expect, entirely dark gray, complete with that awful washed out laminate flooring.)
(here is a sneak peek inside. the rest is not really important nor interesting.)
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Anyway, without further ado, let's hit it from the top.
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First off, no, I don't know what is inside this house's giant, hammerhead-esque forehead. It's not supported by anything so my assumption is, well, nothing. They put this in there for the sheer aesthetic love of the game.
Second, we have to talk about the siding. It's vinyl, and $500 grand is firmly in Hardie®™© Board territory. You can already start to see it ripple against the cornice, which is probably fine. The cornices are painted black in a cartoony, Roy Lichtenstein fashion, that is, if Roy Lichtenstein was drunk. The can lights are a nice touch. They help highlight important parts of the facade, such as:
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The vinyl siding and black trim will continue until morale improves. Also, I zoomed out here to include the forehead (fivehead?) just because the scale is INSANE -- that's like a 50-50 wall-to-fivehead ratio. Honestly, even though things in the world are pretty dire, I wouldn't trust that cantilever with my life.
The window layout on this thing makes me wonder if the people who put it together have eyes that can see and a brain that connects to them. Now, I'm not going to invoke the Greek orders or anything, but I am going to say that every single architectural rule is being brazenly broken here. Total impunity. The window and door don't line up at the top, which is the bare minimum of common decency. Then there's that little guy pulling a Leeroy Jenkins up in the corner. You go dude.
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The trim on these masses is starting to look AI generated but it's probably just the HDR every realtor uses. The FaceTune of the field. Anyway, I think it's a bad idea to put what looks like builder grade wood flooring on the outside of a house. It's giving mold. It's giving sunbleaching. It's giving Etsy.
As we can see, another familiar McMansion Hell enemy has also made an appearance: the prairie mullion window. There is no reason to use this window unless it involves building a fake bungalow, but the worst possible place to use it is in this particular situation. It's the only window with white mullions, it looks weird with the siding, and it's not exactly """modern""" or whatever this house is supposed to be.
(Often I wonder if some people believe that modernism is just "doing some stuff with squares" and the more squares there are the more modernist it is. Probably not true, but then again, I'm not the one pulling massive profit on houses that look like doo doo so jokes on me.)
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Zooming out again because context still matters even in the most nonsensical situations. The funny thing about this house is that the only normal part of it is the front door and even then... what?? Also, look at that siding-less patch of brick on the right. As though to say: haha! Finally, I love how the stairs lead down into a bunch of rocks. Serves you right!
Thanks to advanced screenshotting technology, we can see that there are also prairie mullions on these other windows, it's just that they're a more reasonable black. Don't worry though, the windows are still offensive. They're two windows stuck together in order to give the impression of a single continuous one. (Remember the inside shot?) Nice try, bucko. Second, why don't the two windows meet where that little band of siding is? Well, we all know the answer to this question. (We don't, in fact, know the answer to this question.)
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This is my favorite part of the house. It's almost good, to me, which is why I saved it for last. I have no idea what the hell that glossy composition book siding is but I love it. I've never seen it before. I also like how they're doing a weird entablature-quoin combo thing with it, but only on the right side of the house. There's some great five-cornice action going on but, thanks to the precedents set by truly mid postmodernism, it works.
Unfortunately there are some downsides here. What's the deal with that tiny, skinny stone? brick? veneer? Second, why is the siding just hanging off the edge like that? That whole little section where the three (four?) cladding meet is precipitous. The cheapo off-white developer special garage door with the little trad elements is a nice gesture, one that tells you life has no meaning. Why bother?
Anyway, after all that, if we put it all together again, we get this:
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My 2025 demo reel! I haven't made a reel since 2017, so it was very difficult, but exciting to choose from the extensive catalog of work I've done throughout the years 💀
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can someone post cid banana
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post-apocalyptic gang like the kings, the gang that worship elvis from fallout new vegas, except they’re all skaters who worship tony hawk
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Rogue lurking hours outside your local tavern 🗡️ -- Please don't reupload my art. Don't use my art to train AI.
Reblogs rock though! Thanks! 💚
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I have just learned that Mountain Goats are NOT, in fact, actual Goats.
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now what I need on my desk by 10am sharp tomorrow is 15-25 scenarios of The Character smeared in blood (a mixture of their own and others') and weak at the knees as they dissolve into a paroxysm of despair upon the sudden inescapable reckoning with their forcibly shattered sense of selfhood and humanity
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NO KINGS! Be safe tomorrow 🇺🇸
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i actually never ever want AO3 to be censored bc nothing is more fun than reading the tags on a fic and going “huh. didn’t know there was a market for that.”
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Link to thread
Link to news story
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“caught in the crossfire” is crazy work when it’s your own reporter and it’s a video where you can just watch the cop aim directly at her and shoot her completely 100% on purpose with your own two eyes
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I DID IT.
"Prince Marine: The Dandy Robot" has a whole ass website. Like, as in a personal goddamn website! With a domain name and everything!
Here's the link!
It's done. HOLY SHIT. From now on, this will serve as THE main page for my webcomic, so go ahead and bookmark it if you guys are following my stuff!
There are stuff I still need to do (RSS) and mild cosmetics, but it's finished. Comicfury will still serve as a back-up site and the webcomic's Tumblr will still serve to promote/update the comic.
⭐ Comicfury: thedandyrobot.the-comic.org 🤖 Tumblr: thedandyrobot.tumblr.com
God, I feel good. Making a personal website for my webcomic has been a dream of mine for years and it's finally happened!
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I Guess I Should Update Ya'll...
The upcoming Kickstarter's demo is wrapping up. Which means in a week or two, we'll go into refining the Kickstarter page, then going full speed ahead on the campaign. (Despite the fact we're only 10% of the follower goal on the actual Kickstarter page. Near existential dread there, but!) If the team has any fortune left, the Kickstarter follower count won't at all be indicative of the success of the game's campaign. So instead of looking at something I can't control, I will focus on showing everyone the vibe and feel of the sequel, and what they should expect in terms of changes.
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First thing's first! Matching the narrative tones between the in-game sprites and the CGs has been greatly improved since the original game. Yes, partly because I have improved my directing and we have WAY more time to work with than before. But also, ssam_reptile's utter dedication to getting that look down while insisting on honoring @nekojirou sprites cannot be denied. There will be some scenes in the demo (that we're obviously not going to show here) that will absolutely have moments of "...Oh this is clean." And we can't wait to see ya'll's reaction to the events that play out.
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Speaking of play, the core gameplay (read a visual book) is the same. But we've updated the UI a bit. The original UI artist makes his return, and presents us with a far simpler look that will hopefully cut down on confusion. Some fun little highlights:
Speaking character's name moved to the center
Quick menu display has more recognizable naming and icons
New font and font color
Name of the song playing now appears! With a volume slider!
Some of the new, cool features to the UI to be added post-campaign
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And the story? For now, let's just say that breaking this game up into two has given us ideas and opportunities that we would not have had if this sequel was included in the original Women of Xal like we originally intended. One of the most notable changes is in fact the tone. Taking place weeks after the events of The True Ending of Women of Xal I, Xjena is learning the hard way that you cannot be a Matriarch without making enemies. And enemies of the powerful tend to be quite formidable themselves.
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For the 1% of you who are familiar with how my stories tend to progress, this will be familiar territory: The honeymoon period that was the first part, no matter how light or dark it started, can never truly return. From this point on, things take a more serious turn, and the writing's real teeth come through. The script will still make you smile, laugh, and have heartwarming moments, but the characters have moved on from castle shenanigans. They're locked in for the turbulent second half, and the writing/presentation will reflect that.
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Women of Xal II Demo Features
40 Minute Demo
New outfits for most of the returning cast
New locations
New environment art
All new music
Two new key characters
Liz has freckles now (You can thank ssam_reptile)
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Please hit that Notify Me At Launch button! I'm quite serious when I say that the Kickstarter website LOVES seeing traction from the first few hours of launch and will help us encourage them to boost us from within.
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As Her sense of sight personified, Janus has become entrenched in the Clot's monitoring system. His booned body has even relented to his job and backed him into a more unyeilding rank. Drawing him closer to Lilin as the only place he can allow any openness towards others. In return, he continues the cycle in self-checks to stay in her good graces.
Edit: Oh god, Tumblr ate the image quality... click the images for a better look A companion piece to this drawing. The other one was more accurate to how the office looks while this is more about vibes. Making this fool look cooler than he actually is. Alas, some of the details in the crt tvs were lost in the process of adding that heavy bloom.
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