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Partner and I are meeting in a middle location before we go on our trip. I'm taking the train and they're driving so it's a fucking race, buddy. Your pathetic individualistic nightmare machine or my brilliant public transit, the likes of which can only be beaten if we invent portal technology

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I'm putting a leather cover on my thread book to make it more durable, and debating a layer of board between the paper and leather for extra rigidity.

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Gorg as in gorgeous

dumb argument with a friend, so

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Fairy: Hey I didn’t get your name.

Me: Yeah that was on purpose.

Fairy: Oh my god stealing people’s names has been categorized as a war crime for like a hundred years. Do I seem like the kind of fairy that would do war crimes?

Me: Well yes, but that’s just my impression of you personally. Not fairies in general.

Fairy: You’re smarter than I thought.

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270325. Inattentive Subtype.

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alright so I'm flimsily constructing a novel around the premise of dating a spider man. not the Marvel kind, but a man who is literally half spider.

so we start off, and it's invasion of the bodysnatchers. a race of aliens that are definitely not yeerks are taking over the Canadian parliament. then, what's this? truck-kun?

the alien wakes up. it's been isekaiid into a fantasy world, and is now in the body of a frail albino prince. and it's up to him (and a troop of plucky heros) to defeat the demon lord!

but along the way, after slaughtering a mass of the demon lord's forces, they take a spider man captive, forcing him to serve as their guide. sparks fly. roses blossom. some weird gay alien/ spider man action commences.

I don't know what happens after that, maybe just 200 pages of biologically accurate spider sex.

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things you DO NOT need to be a man

a dick

he/him pronouns

XY chromosomes

things you DO need to be a man

the swiftness of a coursing river

the force of a great typhoon

the strength of a raging fire

the mysteriousness of the dark side of the moon

^this post was brought to you by LGBT^

Let's

Get down to

Business

To defeat the huns

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yeah im “transitioning” *dissolves into tiny pieces as i click to the next slide*

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Werewolf boyfriend

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Wing Eared Cats Just a fun little doodle. Switching it up from all those detailed paintings~

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So I started working again today, and me and my coworker had to squeeze lemons which usually is a really un fun job but TODAY. We had the mostly lovely batch of lemons to work with. So we rated how smoothly they cut and how nice the insides of them looked for about an hour. An absolutely marvelous time I gotta say

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the new dj crazytimes song … now that’s what I call music!

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i am shrunken down and brought to the gnome world and when i attempt to assimilate to their culture I use an acorn cap as a hat and they all laugh cheerfully at my silly mistake of wearing what they use as a bowl like a cap and though this is a transgression that would have humiliated me in my human life I am instead laughing alongside them at my humorous misunderstanding

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What To Know About ‘Sinners’

Sinners, the new movie from Ryan Coogler starring Michael B. Jordan, has received widespread praise from critics and audiences. The Onion shares everything you need to know about the film.